Segments are rated on a scale of 1-5 stars
COLD OPENING
Pumping Up With Hans & Franz- clips show the guys “up close & personal”
— Not too excited to see the season start off with a recurring sketch that I was starting to get sick of by the end of last season.
— Hans’ confusing talk about picking up laundry without a claim check was pretty funny.
— Hmm, maybe it’s because it’s the start of a new season, but it turns out I’m surprisingly finding myself in a more tolerant mood towards these two characters than usual tonight.
— The slow-motion Olympic profile utilizing clips of last season’s Hans and Franz sketches is interesting. Also, the fact that SNL already had enough Hans and Franz footage to make a full montage out of, despite these characters having debuted only a year earlier, shows how heavily-used these characters have been in such a short amount of time.
— Another thing I noticed about that Hans and Franz montage is that it really shows how different SNL looks in this new season compared to how it looked the previous season. (just compare the visual look of the first screencap above with the last three screencaps above)
STARS: ***
OPENING MONTAGE
— New montage!
— Very interesting blue screen filter used for this.
— The SNL logo has been changed. This new circular one is probably my favorite SNL logo of all-time, though I may be biased because it’s used during my favorite SNL years (late 80s and early 90s).
— Some really good shots of the cast, especially Dennis Miller’s cool shot in the convertible.
— A lot of VERY memorable visuals throughout this, particularly the static-y TV screen laying in front of a river, Nora Dunn and Jan Hooks laughing hysterically in the backseat of a car, an old man looking at the camera with a deadpan facial expression while sitting in front of a moving ferris wheel, the person who’s shown right after the SNL logo (fourth screencap above), the “Sin Will Find You” neon cross, the pants-less(?) guy bopping along to music (third-to-last screencap above), the close-up of a dog looking at the camera while getting its belly rubbed, and the shot of the entire cast gathered together at a restaurant table.
MONOLOGUE
host’s backstage conversations reveal that he truly is a really nice guy
— Feels kinda weird but fun reviewing a Tom Hanks episode again so soon after I reviewed his previous episode just two days ago.
— Some good humor from Tom’s humbleness over the press labeling him the nicest guy in Hollywood.
— Interesting fake-out with the monologue “ending”, only to continue when Tom arrives backstage afterwards. This false ending is something they’d later repeat in Tom’s season 17 monologue (the one where he goes off on a Joe Pesci-esque “How am I funny?” rant to Phil Hartman backstage).
— The backstage scenes have a lot of very funny exaggerations of Tom’s niceness, helped by the use of sentimental background music and dramatic close-ups of Tom’s face.
— Phil’s angry tirade in the control room is cracking me up.
— The very first on-screen appearance of then-SNL-writer Conan O’Brien (“Careful, Mr. Hanks, this horse bites everyone!”).
— We also get a noteworthy appearance from fellow SNL writer Bob Odenkirk as an NBC page getting manhandled by two thugs. This is the first time in this SNL project of mine that I’ve caught an Odenkirk sighting, but I just found out his first SNL appearance was actually as a background audience member in the BushWhacked cold opening that I covered in the previous season. A shame I didn’t notice him there.
— I love Tom’s overreaction to realizing he forgot to thank the audience for coming.
— Overall, one of my all-time favorite backstage monologues. So many memorable parts here.
STARS: ****½
FIRST CITIWIDE CHANGE BANK
Paul McElroy (JID) explains their mission
— The concept of a bank specializing in change is hilarious.
— I love the mock-seriousness of the testimonials and disclaimer screens.
— Jim Downey is fantastic in this. One of the best displays of how his dead-serious delivery can make absurd dialogue come off hysterical.
STARS: *****
ABC CAMPAIGN 88
Diane Sawyer (JAH) moderates Michael Dukakis (JOL) vs. George Bush (DAC)
— Good beginning with Tom’s Peter Jennings announcing what’s currently airing on other channels, as part of the Bush camp’s demands.
— Love Jan’s performance as Diane Sawyer.
— The gag with Bush being on a higher platform than Dukakis as they shake each other’s hand after making their entrance would later be copied in a George W. Bush/John Kerry debate sketch in 2004. The gag didn’t even make sense in that context! It made sense here because Dukakis is much shorter than Bush Sr., whereas neither Kerry nor Bush Jr. are short. Ugh, don’t get me started on what a failure those Bush/Kerry debate sketches were. I’m eventually going to have to cover the awfulness that is SNL in 2004 anyway.
— Kevin’s Sam Donaldson impression now has the comically-thick eyebrows that his impression is remembered for today.
— Hilarious bit with Dukakis using a mechanical lift to reach over the podium.
— A good laugh from a deadpan Dukakis “proving” how enraged and off-the-handle he is right now.
— Dana’s Bush impression has further developed over the summer, though it’s STILL not at the cartoonish, exaggerated level it would later be.
— Love the whole absurd argument between Bush and Dukakis regarding a time machine.
— Priceless part with Jan’s Diane Sawyer getting a bowl of popcorn thrown at her out of nowhere after kindly telling the audience to hold their applause.
— There’s Dana-as-Bush’s memorable, inane “Stay the course, a thousand points of light” speech.
— Dukakis’ rebuttal to the aforementioned inane Bush speech: “I can’t believe I’m losin’ to this guy!” A legendary moment that defines this debate sketch.
— Great part with Bush demonstrating a bulletproof bubble.
— Dukakis: “My parents were little people… little, swarthy people.”
— Bush, when explaining he didn’t know the Iran arms sale would go to the Contras: “I was told the money was going to the bombing of abortion clinics.”
— I love the commitment to this debate parody, with them even going so far as to do a post-debate analysis with Tom’s Peter Jennings and Phil’s David Brinkley.
— I’ve said it before, but I love Phil’s David Brinkley voice.
— Hilarious “food for maggots” line from Phil’s Brinkley.
— The debut of SNL child extra Jeff Renaudo’s Dan Quayle impression, which would go on to be a running gag. Very inspired joke to have Quayle played by a child, as a comical exaggeration of Quayle’s young age.
— Overall, this classic is among SNL’s greatest debate sketches of all-time, as well as among SNL’s best political satire in general.
STARS: *****
MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “Take It So Hard”
MR. SHORT-TERM MEMORY
Mr. Short-Term Memory (host) is forgetful during a dinner date with (VIJ)
— The debut of a very memorable Tom Hanks recurring sketch.
— I love the opening credits sequence of this.
— Tom’s increasing forgetfulness is very funny, with him even forgetting who his date is a minute into the sketch.
— Phil’s reactions are great.
— Tom is so fun as this character.
— I love how Phil is now making up stuff to go along with Tom’s forgetfulness.
— Hilarious part with Tom spitting out food that “mysteriously” got into his mouth, and then complaining in an outrage “This restaurant serves already-been-chewed food!”
— Good ending with the “mysterious” wallet Tom finds in his pocket.
STARS: ****
FIRST CITIWIDE CHANGE BANK
more customer testimonials in praise of First Citiwide Change Bank
— Very funny line from Phil detailing the type of foreign change he received for a five-pound note.
— An overall equally-classic follow-up to the classic Part 1 of this ad.
STARS: *****
WEEKEND UPDATE
at the All-Drug Olympics, KEN reports on (PHH)’s weightlifting attempt
— I loved Dennis’ suggestion of a presidential system called the “volleyball-tocracy”, where 6 men are elected president and one of them serves until he screws up and then one of the other men is rotated into the role for a while.
— Dennis is on fire so far tonight.
— Very funny concept of an “All-Drug Olympics”.
— Phil making a very rare Weekend Update appearance.
— A freakin’ PRICELESS and classic gag with Phil’s arms coming off during his attempt to lift a huge barbell. Great touch with the fake blood and those stringy organs hanging out of his arm sockets.
— Funny line from Kevin about how Phil’s character doesn’t have much pain right now, but tomorrow “he’s really gonna feel that.”
— An overall fantastic Update. My favorite Dennis Miller Update so far.
STARS: ****½
GIRL WATCHERS
the desensitized losers experience deja vu at their high school reunion
— Jon’s unibrow from the first installment of this sketch is missing tonight. Guess the unibrow was just a one-time thing.
— I said this last time these characters appeared, but I always love Jon and Tom’s smug, slow delivery in these sketches.
— Jon: “She caught the shine on my forehead and just kept on truckin’.”
— Jon, to an approaching woman: “It’s been a while…” (approaching woman passes them by) “…aaaand it’ll BE a while.”
— Kevin’s appearance here is much funnier than his appearance in the first Girl Watchers sketch. Love his bragging about his unappealing wife, especially him hinting that she’s “not the clean one”.
STARS: ****
JEW, NOT A JEW
contestants try to identify celebrities’ lineages
Feldman’s Kosher Pickles’ You Make The Call- yes, Sandy Koufax was a Jew
— There goes Jan in Ana Gasteyer’s future Bobbi Mohan-Culp dress one again.
— Speaking of Jan, I’m watching the live version of this episode, and Jan’s hair in this sketch looks very different from how I remember it looking in reruns. The rerun version of this sketch must be from dress rehearsal. (side-by-side comparison of Jan’s hair below)
— Great part with Tom explaining the rules of what qualifies as a Jew.
— Fun sketch so far.
— Nice “You Make The Call” segment.
— Al Franken voice-over: “Sandy Koufax: Baseball great. Jew.”
— A strong and memorable sketch overall.
STARS: ****
BIG
outtakes from Big show Josh (host) using his size to bully the other kids
— I like Tom’s threatening repetitions of “Look how big I am!” to a kid he’s bullying.
— Very funny part with Tom casually shoving a kid to the ground at the end of a scene.
— The baseball scene is a freakin’ riot, especially the child umpire eventually running away from Tom’s pending tackle.
— Nice segue at the end to introducing Keith Richards’ musical performance.
STARS: ***½
MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “Struggle”
THE PAT STEVENS SHOW
Barbara Bush (PHH) & Kitty Dukakis (JAH) bicker
— Strange that a well-established recurring sketch like this is appearing at the end of the night.
— Some laughs from Pat Stevens’ explanation of a First Lady “runner-up”.
— Pat’s constant ignorance and mistakes towards her guests are coming off funnier than usual tonight.
— Funny line about Kitty Dukakis being addicted to amphetamines for 26 years.
— The way Jan’s Kitty Dukakis keeps pushing her husband Michael’s political issues is making me laugh.
— Love the cattiness between Kitty Dukakis and Barbara Bush.
— Overall, easily my favorite Pat Stevens installment so far. Also, contrary to my worries, this thankfully wasn’t a carbon copy of the previous Pat Stevens sketch that Phil’s Barbara Bush appeared in. In fact, I feel this was the better of the two.
STARS: ****
GOODNIGHTS
IMMEDIATE POST-SHOW THOUGHTS
— An absolutely fantastic way to start the season. By far, one of the best season premieres I’ve reviewed so far. And what a stellar return the show made after such a long writers’ strike & summer break. This episode was firing on all cylinders, giving us lots of strong sketches all night and producing some all-time memorable and classic moments. Very rarely, if ever, have I done a review where I consistently gave out so many four and five-star ratings. And of course, it doesn’t hurt that Tom Hanks did his usual masterful job as host. With this season premiere, I feel that I’ve officially arrived at the late 80s era fully hitting its stride.
HOW THIS EPISODE STACKS UP AGAINST THE PRECEDING SEASON (1987-88)
a step up
My full set of screencaps for this episode is here
TOMORROW
Matthew Broderick