December 13, 1997 – Helen Hunt / Hanson (S23 E9)

Segments are rated on a scale of 1-5 stars

CAROLING
carollers Marty & Bobbi work pop songs into their Christmas medley

— An interestingly out-of-the-ordinary use of The Culps. Not only are they out of their usual setting, but they’re being shown from a first-person perspective.
— I like Ana’s quiet laugh.
— And now, to make this Culps installment even more out-of-the-ordinary, we get the Culps being joined by two additional singers, played by Helen Hunt and Tim. This is the debut of Tim’s recurring Spanish teacher character from these sketches.
— Lots of funny lines among the pre-song pleasantries the Culps are trying to have with the off-camera person who’s perspective we’re seeing.
— I absolutely love how the Culps transitioned from the “two turtle doves” part of the “12 Days of Christmas” song into Prince’s “When Doves Cry”.
— Another great song transition, with Nat King Cole’s “The Christmas Song” turning into “99 Luftballoons”.
— Overall, I feel this is the best Culps sketch I’ve reviewed up to this point.
STARS: ****

MONOLOGUE
Jack Nicholson [real] responds to castmembers’ impressions of him

— Pretty funny bit spoofing Helen’s hairstyle similarities with Hanson, by having her claim she’s the oldest member of Hanson, complete with a doctored photo being shown of her singing with them.
— Very funny Jack Nicholson impression from Jim, especially the facial expressions he’s making.
— Ha, Colin’s about to try a Jack Nicholson? Well, this sure is going to be a case of “so bad, it’s funny”.
— Hmm, Colin’s impression actually wasn’t all that terrible, showing that anyone can do a Nicholson (except Cheri Oteri, apparently, though her impression was still pretty funny).
— Surprisingly, this is the first time Jack Nicholson has ever appeared on SNL.
— Another good facial expression from Jim, this time when silently reacting to Jack confronting him with the obligatory quote from “A Few Good Men”.
STARS: ***

COOKIE DOUGH SPORT
Rerun from 10/4/97

THE DELICIOUS DISH
Margaret Jo & Terry drink eggnog & welcome rock & roll pastry chef (host)

— Ha, judging from the unusual demeanor of Molly’s character at the beginning of this, is she tipsy on eggnog?
— Yep, she is. This is going to be an interesting change of pace for this recurring sketch.
— A pretty good laugh from when, after Molly timidly says “I’m a little tipsy”, Ana bluntly says “I’m totally wasted.”
— Funny part with a tipsy Molly getting called out on saying something “mean” and “out of line” by her tame standards.
— Great twist with Ana and Molly finding out that the eggnog they’re drinking is actually non-alcoholic, meaning they’re not drunk like they had thought.
— Funny opening line from Helen in regards to her name Trudy.
— Some amusing features of Helen’s Graceland gingerbread house.
— I got a good laugh from Ana and Molly’s story about how their failed attempt at building a gingerbread house “got really ugly… we almost killed ourselves”, which is followed by an uncomfortably long silence between all three ladies.
— Overall, one of my favorite Delicious Dish installments.
STARS: ****

TV FUNHOUSE
“Fun With Real Audio” by RBS- Jesus searches for holiday spirit

— Here’s what would go on to be known as a classic TV Funhouse.
— I love Jesus making warning gestures behind various televangelists, and the televangelists attempting to get rid of him.
— A huge laugh from how one televangelist scene just has Jesus coming in, immediately kicking a televangelist who’s trying to “heal” a man in a wheelchair, and immediately leaving.
— Hilarious bit with a black choir breaking out into an energetic rendition of “Hallelujah” as soon as Jesus makes Kathie Lee Gifford disappear.
— Excellent twist with Linus’ Jesus speech from a Peanuts Christmas special being the only thing that Jesus agrees with, moving him to tears.
— A legendary ending visual of Jesus doing the Peanuts dance down the street.
STARS: *****

THE LADIES’ MAN
Leon & skank (host) field callers’ lovelife questions

— Yet another change of pace for a recurring sketch tonight, with this being the very first Ladies’ Man sketch to have a guest.
— A big laugh from Leon Phelps asking a caller “Medically speaking, just how dinky is your wang?” I also like how right afterwards, the caller is heard muttering “Not very medical…” under his breath.
— I’m surprised this sketch is already wrapping up. It felt like it was only about two-and-a-half minutes long.
— Good ending reveal from Leon that his definition of “dinner and a movie” is having sex and videotaping it.
STARS: ***½

BASEBALL DREAMS
major leaguers sour youngster’s (CHK) dream of becoming a baseball player

— Here comes another classic piece tonight.
— Chris always makes a convincing child.
— I love how comically out-of-hand the number of entering athletes is getting.
— Chris’ increasingly disillusioned attitude towards the athletes is great.
— Very funny line about how Ken Griffey Jr. stopped at a strip joint down the street.
— A particularly strong part with Will entering as a random guy, Ted Brogan, who played a little minor league in the 80s.
— Ted Brogan, to Chris’ mom: “I got rolling papers if you got weed!”
— When police sirens are heard, I love Brogan handing his gun to Chris and asking him to hide it.
STARS: *****

MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “MMMBop”

WEEKEND UPDATE
COQ’s inebriation derails his International Monetary Fund commentary

— (*sigh*) Well, this is it. The final Norm Macdonald Weekend Update, which Norm himself was not aware of at the time.
— For obvious reasons, it’s very interesting in retrospect that Colin does a commentary as himself in Norm’s last Update. The even more interesting thing about this is that Norm himself did a commentary in the final Update anchored by the man who he would succeed as an Update anchor: Kevin Nealon. Two unintentional passings of the torch.

— Colin does a variation of the drunk commentary he did in the preceding season.
— I like Colin’s line about not getting his own movie deal “like The Roxbury Twins or whatever”.
— Funny ending visual of Colin’s commentary, with him standing up with half of his face covered in eggnog, after having his face shoved against the eggnog-covered Update desk a little earlier.
— An all-time classic Norm Update joke right now, about the percentage of two pie charts not adding up to 100% because the math was done by a woman. The audience’s reaction is priceless, which Norm follows up by telling them “For those of you hissing at that joke, it should be noted that that joke was written by a woman…. Now you don’t know what the hell to do, do ya?”, and then, after letting the audience react to that, casually adds in “Nah, I’m just kidding, we don’t hire women” before immediately attempting to move on with the next joke.
— A strong final joke from Norm, regarding Don Johnson dating a 71-year-old.
— Sad seeing Norm sign off at the end of this Update when you know that he’s unaware this is his last sign-off.
— And thus ends Norm’s last-ever Weekend Update. Before SNL comes back from Christmas break, Norm, along with Update producer Jim Downey, would infamously be abruptly fired from Update by NBC executive Don Ohlmeyer. Everything that can be said about that notorious situation has already been said many times over the years, and will probably continue to be said in the comments section of this review. I have nothing new to add; I just want to question why, if Ohlmeyer was going to fire Norm from Update underservedly, couldn’t Ohlmeyer have at least had the decency to wait until after the season ended? Did he really feel that ratings for Update were so dire that Norm needed to be yanked from Update pronto right in the middle of the season, right after the holidays to boot, and not even letting him know in advance before he went on the air for what ended up being his final Update?
— Seeing Norm go is particularly difficult for me, as he’s tied with Dennis Miller as my personal favorite Weekend Update anchor of all time. It’s been a joy to cover his three-and-a-half-year stint as an Update anchor. Although the quality of his Updates slowed down a bit during this final season of his, they were still enjoyable and he got to go out with a solid final Update, which contained an all-time classic joke (pie chart percentage).
STARS: ****

THE ROXBURY GUYS
therapist (host) counsels Roxbury Guys about how to interact with others

— Meh, these guys again.
— Interesting turn with the club music stopping as Cheri goes on an angry rant at the Roxbury Guys and calls them out on needing professional help.
— Now we get an actual scene of the Roxbury Guys in therapy. Another good shake-up to the format of this recurring sketch.
— A rare occurrence of the Roxbury Guys actually speaking full dialogue, which only happened in one earlier sketch they were in.
— My god, Jack Nicholson’s attempt at doing the Roxbury Guys head bop is LAUGHABLY bad. Epic. Clearly, Will and Chris agree on how laughably bad it is, as after Jack exits, they nod to each other in character before sharing an uncontrollable chuckle.
— The ending was too predictable.
STARS: ***

JOAN RIVERS’ 1997 FASHION WRAP-UP
skeletal Joan Rivers’ fashion critiques dismay Jodie Foster (host)

— A huge laugh right from the start, with the opening visual of Joan Rivers being portrayed by a talking skeleton. Great concept.
— Solid Joan Rivers vocal impression from an off-screen Ana.
— Spot-on casting of Helen as Jodie Foster.
— Due to her SNL ties (as bitter as they are), it feels odd seeing Janeane Garofalo as one of the celebrities in this sketch who’s photo is being harshly critiqued (last screencap above).
— Pretty funny ending gag with the Joan Rivers skeleton head popping off her body.
— Despite some laughs, something felt kinda underwhelming about this overall sketch.
STARS: **½

A BURT REYNOLDS CHRISTMAS
dirty jokes & pranks preclude festivity

— I actually thought this was a real NBC commercial at first, until Norm showed up as Burt Reynolds.
— Norm’s Burt Reynolds is slaying me as always.
— I like Will-as-Jerry-Reed’s disgust at one dirty joke that Burt wants him to read off of a card.
STARS: ***½

CHRISTMASOFT
Bill Gates (CHK) announces that Microsoft has merged with Christmas

— The return of Chris’ childlike, mildly-effeminate take on Bill Gates.
— Amusing concept of Gates merging Microsoft with Christmas.
— Wow, this sketch is ending ALREADY, after only 30 seconds?
— Never mind, I was mistaken.  This sketch isn’t over yet.
— The creepy mechanical message from a computerized Santa cracked me up.
— I love the security camera footage of Jim’s Fidel Castro and his men partying to Chumbawumba’s “Tubthumping”. Just hearing that song in this sketch makes this feel like such a time capsule for 1997.
— Hmm, maybe this sketch should’ve ended early after all, like I mistakenly thought it would 30 seconds into this. After about two minutes, this sketch is now starting to feel oddly stretched out and is going on too long. Feels like Chris is just vamping for time by this point, which he is not doing well. This sketch is slowly dying.
— Weak ending.
STARS: **

TORTURING HANSON
vengeful (WIF) & (host) repeatedly subject musical guest to “MMMBop”

— Our obligatory Hanson sketch appearance of the night.
— I love Helen sternly pointing out to Hanson how overplayed “MMMBop” was during the spring and summer of 1997. Brings back memories of how much 13-year-old me hated that song with a fiery passion back in ’97. Both that AND the Spice Girls’ “Wannabe” song were the musical bane of 13-year-old me’s existence.
— Great concept of Helen and Will brutally torturing Hanson by forcing them to listen to an endless loop of “MMMBop”.
— I’ll give credit to Hanson for being good sports to participate in this.
— I can excuse the overacting from the two Hanson brothers who are acting out a mental breakdown.
— I love the dark ending with Will being shot off-camera, complete with blood being seen on the wall behind him when the elevator doors open back up.
STARS: ****

MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “Merry Christmas Baby”

GOODNIGHTS
host & castmembers end the show from Rockefeller Center skating rink

— Skating rink goodnights! Always a treat to see.

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IMMEDIATE POST-SHOW THOUGHTS
— A fairly solid Christmas episode; better than I had remembered, in fact. The first half was very impressive, with two five-star classics (TV Funhouse and Baseball Dreams) and a few other strong sketches. Things slowed down in the second half, but there were still some good things there, especially the Torturing Hanson sketch. I also like how tonight’s episode shook things up with the recurring characters, by refreshingly having them do something different for a change.

MY PERSONAL CHOICE OF “BEST OF” MOMENTS FOR THIS EPISODE, REPRESENTED WITH SCREENCAPS

HOW THIS EPISODE STACKS UP AGAINST THE PRECEDING ONE (Nathan Lane)
a very slight step down

My full set of screencaps for this episode is here

TOMORROW
We enter the year 1998, with host Samuel L. Jackson, and the beginning of a new era of Weekend Update