Segments are rated on a scale of 1-5 stars
VICE PRESIDENTIAL ADDRESS
Dick Cheney (DAH) is concerned about networks’ battle for David Letterman
— Darrell makes his return after having to miss the last episode due to a rehab stint (though at the time, the public was given other reasons for his absence). At the very beginning of this cold opening, the audience immediately welcomes Darrell back with an extended HUGE round of applause. Quite a heartwarming SNL moment.
— A good laugh from how the “serious” matter Darrell’s Dick Cheney addresses turns out to be the hoopla at the time about David Letterman being rumored to move over to ABC.
— Pretty funny bit with Cheney indirectly comparing Craig Kilborn to President Bush, when asking, in regards to Kilborn, “How does a guy who can’t read, with nothin’ but good looks and charm, get to such a high position?” However, I gotta say, the implication that one of the reasons Bush got elected president is due to his so-called good looks is quite a stretch, to say the least.
— Ha, SNL makes another reference to the “Dude, you’re gettin’ a Dell” commercial guy. At the time, I hated those commercials, but now, when I see these old SNL episodes making a reference to the Dell guy, I get nostalgic thinking back on those commercials. Funny how nostalgia works sometimes.
STARS: ***½
OPENING MONTAGE
— Much like the Josh Hartnett episode from earlier this season, Will Ferrell will not be appearing in any sketches in tonight’s episode, nor in the next episode, as he continues to film the movie Old School. However, unlike the Josh Hartnett episode, Will hasn’t been removed from the opening montage in tonight’s episode, nor will he be in the next episode. I wonder if SNL decided to leave him in the montage because of the scare his removal from the Hartnett episode’s montage caused online, with some worried SNL fans wondering if Will is officially no longer on the show.
MONOLOGUE
host does stand-up about late-night wars, NYC, gay rights, sexuality
— I like how Jon Stewart immediately addresses the Letterman/ABC rumors and if Jon himself will be willing to take any of the open talk show spots at CBS or ABC, which Jon answers here by desperately saying “Yes, I would”, and goes on about how he would gladly replace ANYONE who’s willing to leave. By the way, I found out just a few days ago that ABC almost did end up going with Jon as their late night host, but ended up deciding to give it to Jimmy Kimmel instead.
— Jon, on one of the downsides of his show airing on Comedy Central: “Your show comes on after THREE Andrew McCarthy movies. Do you understand what that’s like? And not the good ones where the mannequin comes to life. The bad ones.”
— Jon: “Are Justin and Britney the before, and Kid Rock and Pam Anderson the after?”
— All of Jon’s material about gays is working for me, and what helps most of it age well (I say “most of it” because I don’t know how people today would react to the whole part with Jon implying the boy scouts are gay, though *I* laughed, due to Jon’s solid delivery) is the fact that Jon is taking a pro-gay stance here.
— Jon, on a guy having sex with a pinata: “…or maybe that’s how they get the candy in them.”
— Great bit about having a sexual attraction to pumpkins.
— Jon: “If you think puttin’ the Ten Commandments up is gonna stop violence, then you think ‘Employees must wash hands’ is keepin’ the urine outta your Happy Meal.”
— Fantastic stand-up monologue overall.
STARS: *****
THE CHEESE GAME
George Plimpton [real] pitches fun way to raise gourmets
— George Plimpton makes another funny random SNL appearance, after the Just Enjoy The Ozzy sketch from season 24.
— For some reason, something about the execution of this is kinda reminding me of that solid The Bird Bible commercial that SNL would later do in season 39.
— A random and questionable premise at first glance, but the execution of it is actually strong and has a lot of charm.
— I like Parnell and Amy’s weirded-out facial reaction when George Plimpton puts his arms around them and introduces himself to them.
— Great ending visual of the little kid sleeping with a cheese grater by his side.
STARS: ****
TRL
(host)’s genetically-engineered boy band makes debut
— Pretty good bit at the beginning with Jimmy’s Carson Daly momentarily breaking from his usual calm demeanor to yell “SHUT UP!” at the screaming teen girls in the TRL audience.
— A hilarious look and voice from Jon as a boy band manager. Something about his voice kinda reminds me of an Adam Sandler character, for some reason. Am I thinking of Audience McGee?
— I like the vague implication that Jon’s character once got busted for something illegal that was found on his hard drive.
— Funny bizarre random concept of a genetically-engineered boy band.
— Some good details in the oddities of Jon’s genetically-engineered boy band members, such as the member played by Parnell being allergic to light. Oh, and, of course, uh… Assface. Wow.
— I absolutely LOVE Parnell briefly breaking out into a hard, fast-paced rap, before suddenly cowering away from a shining light in his face. Parnell’s rapping skills never cease to amaze me.
— A priceless line from Horatio about how his penis looks like a thick piece of bacon with a toenail hanging from it.
— I love Horatio’s anguished “Just kill me; I have GILLS!!!” rant during his solo number.
— Ha, the Assface dance solo is absolutely hilarious. Some SNL fans have had a theory that the (male) Assface character is actually played by a woman, perhaps Tina or Maya, due to Assface’s body supposedly looking somewhat feminine under that outfit when he’s dancing. Yeah, I don’t see it. And whoever it is in that Assface costume seems a little taller than Tina and Maya. Whether male or female, I’m sure the person in that costume is just some extra who’s trained in dancing.
STARS: ****
CUSTOMS
Bloater brothers’ dad (host) comes to rescue them from airport security
— The Bloater Brothers make their first appearance since Parnell’s return to the cast, and they are welcomed warmly byyyyyyyy…. nobody but me, as I’m probably the only person in existence who can tolerate these two characters. Don’t expect ANY kind of positive reception from me, however, when we get the inevitable return of those godforsaken DeMarco Brothers that Parnell does with Kattan.
— I particularly like the “War, huh, good god ya’ll, what is it good for, absolutely nothing” bit the Bloather Brothers are doing.
— The Bloater Brothers now have their inevitable “host plays a character with the same traits as a current cast member’s recurring character” installment. I recall hearing that there was later going to be another “host plays a character with the same traits as a current cast member’s recurring character” Bloater Brothers installment in the Winona Ryder-hosted finale from the end of this season, in a sketch that got cut after dress rehearsal in which Ryder played a Bloater Brothers-esque woman who the brothers meet on a cruise ship.
— Jon’s doing an accurate imitation of the Bloater Brothers.
— Pretty funny ending regarding a cavity search.
STARS: ***
TV FUNHOUSE
“Fun With Real Audio” by RBS- Colin Powell hallucinates a generation gap
— An okay mockery of the intelligence level of MTV audiences.
— Pretty funny visual of one MTV audience member hallucinating Colin Powell having huge cleavage. That feels like a precursor to that “The Life Of Big-Boobed Einstein” TV Funhouse that Robert Smigel would later do in the Molly Shannon-hosted episode from season 32.
— Good hallucination of Colin Powell as Capt. Crunch.
— Ha, a Beavis and Butthead cameo! Kinda odd seeing them right after a Bloater Brothers sketch, considering I recall some online SNL fans back in this era comparing both pairs of characters (oh, is THAT why people can’t stand the Bloater Brothers?).
— A new MTV show titled “Colin Powell Wails On Teens”? Now THAT’S the kind of MTV programming I would’ve proudly watched back then, and I was a teen myself when tonight’s episode originally aired.
STARS: ***
TALKIN’ TO THE STARS WITH RACHEL AND TRACY
good girl RAD & bad boy TRM interview host
— An experimental new cornrow hairstyle from Tracy.
— Interesting seeing Rachel and Tracy as themselves hosting a talk show sketch together. No idea how SNL came up with this random pairing of Rachel and Tracy, but I like it.
— Tracy’s distinct “Tracy-speak” all throughout this sketch, and the juxtaposition of it and Rachel’s professional speak, are priceless.
— Rachel: “I find if Tracy says a word I don’t know, it usually means ‘high’.”
— Jon’s reaction to finding out there’s hardcore porn on cable is pretty funny.
— Tracy, to Rachel, regarding Jon: “You don’t care about no Daily Show! You just wanna be his Daily Ho!”
— Jon, regarding Rachel: “Very cute, she’s charming and, uh, very funny.” Tracy: “So why don’choo get her pregnant?” That’s our very first SNL occurrence of Tracy saying a line about getting somebody pregnant, something that would go on to be a major Tracy Morgan trademark both on SNL and beyond.
— I love all of Rachel’s flustered reactions to Tracy.
— Overall, such a great sketch.
— I remember some SNL fans at the time were expecting this sketch to become recurring (ala The Chris Farley Show), but we end up never seeing it return. I’m not sure if any subsequent installments ever could’ve topped this debut anyway.
STARS: *****
NEWS MEDIA
David Letterman (JER) & Ted Koppel (DAH) confer at telejournalists’ party
— Great to see Parnell’s Tom Brokaw back for the first time since Parnell’s rehiring.
— A very fun setting, as well as a fun excuse for impressions of news anchors.
— Darrell’s Dan Rather saying “Why don’t you go jump up your own ass, Brokaw?” had me howling, though it got only minor chuckles from the audience.
— Seth is certainly trying, but he’s no Rob Lowe when it comes to impersonating Stone Phillips.
— (*groan*) Kattan playing yet another woman. (And yes, I’m aware that Christiane Amanpour is a role he’s already played several times back in his earlier seasons.) Him playing women has become about as tired as him playing gay roles all the time lately.
— Very funny bit with Amy-as-Greta-Van-Susteren’s obvious surgically-altered new breasts, which she comments on by simply saying “Why stop at the eyes?”
— I love the look on Parnell-as-Brokaw’s face when Jimmy is attempting to imitate his voice.
— Fantastic meta bit with Parnell’s Brokaw mistaking Tina for being herself, only for her to reveal she’s supposed to be playing Ashleigh Banfield, then saying “Forget it, I shouldn’t be in sketches anyway” and walking off in disappointment.
— Wow, two Darrell Hammond impressions in one sketch, with both impressions being performed live. (Now we know why Darrell’s Dan Rather had to leave the sketch early.) Having Darrell do two live impressions in the same sketch is nice way to show viewers that “He’s back!” after his personal struggles and absence from the last episode.
— The tense silence among the party when it’s announced that David Letterman is outside the door is hilarious, as is Darrell’s Ted Koppel dramatically saying a bold “Let ‘im in.”
— Yikes, this great sketch briefly comes to a screeching halt with the bit with Maya as Lisa Ling saying an agitated “And, no, I was not in Charlie’s Angels. That was Lucy Liu”, which bombed HARD with the audience. That received season 20 levels of uncomfortable silence.
— When Jeff enters as David Letterman, what the hell was that sound I heard in the background? It sounded like one of the performers on the set spitting something out of their mouth VERY loudly. What the hell?!?
— Now I see Horatio in the background, helplessly laughing his ass off HARD with his head lowered (you can see it in the second-to-last screencap above, if you look between Jeff and Darrell), while an amused Jon is looking at him and appears to be trying to get him to compose himself. Clearly, there’s some kind of connection between this and that bizarre loud spitting sound I heard in the background a moment ago. What the hell happened?!?
— Jeff does it once again with yet ANOTHER spot-on celebrity impression. His David Letterman voice is freakin’ uncanny. I do wish he was given funnier lines here, though.
— It’s about half a minute later, and Horatio is still seen uncontrollably laughing HARD in the background with his head lowered while an amused Jon continues to try to calm him down. And I’m still left scratching my head over what the hell is going on there, but I will NOT let Horatio’s typical unprofessionalism take anything away from this great sketch for me.
— Funny ending visual of Letterman and Koppel tenderly slow-dancing together.
— Rachel was the ONLY cast member missing from this overall sketch. Odd how this is the third sketch lately that was one cast member short of being a full-cast sketch. The Bass-Off sketch from the Jack Black episode was only missing Amy, the Super Buzzers sketch from the Jonny Moseley episode was only missing Jeff, and now this sketch was only missing Rachel. By the way, Rachel’s airtime has taken a real hit lately. She seems to be averaging only 1-2 appearances per show these last few episodes.
STARS: ****½
WEEKEND UPDATE
in a terrible re-enactment, John McEnroe (CHK) reacts to cancellation
host almost gets his chance to be an anchor on network television
Drunk Girl sloppily relates Spring Break safety tips to TIF
— Man, these Terrible Reenactment bits of Kattan’s, which I found funny the first 1 or 2 times they appeared, need to freakin’ STOP. Tonight’s was the unfunniest one yet. And why the hell has Kattan been appearing on EVERY SINGLE UPDATE since the Josh Hartnett episode all the way back in January? I’m telling you, Kattan’s unnecessary presence on SNL this season continues to bug me. I can’t believe I still have a little under a season-and-a-half to go until he finally leaves (and even then, he makes tons of cameos in the first season after he leaves).
— The tree frog joke that gets interrupted by Jimmy getting a leg cramp would go on to be a Weekend Update tradition whenever a joke gets cut off by something.
— I absolutely love this whole segment with an overly eager Jon Stewart being brought in from the bench to fill in for Jimmy as an Update anchor. Also, in the initial shot of Jon getting up from the bench, he’s wearing the same SNL athletic sweatsuit that Kattan and Tracy both wore in Kattan’s Olympic Personal Profile sketch from the season 26 premiere.
— Drunk Girl has officially become recurring.
— Even in her second appearance, Drunk Girl already has a way-too-recognizable pattern of bits that she follows every time in the exact same order. I’m still laughing somewhat, but I’m already seeing early signs of me getting burned out on this character.
STARS: ***½
MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “Video”
JAZZVISIONS
spoons player (host) performs cuts from his sensual album
— Tracy is already getting laughs just from his smooth delivery as the host.
— The music video is hilarious, between Jon’s look, Dean as the singer (yes, you heard right – Dean Edwards is one of the highlights of a sketch), and Jon playing the spoons as an instrument.
— Very funny awkwardness after Tracy responds to Jon’s “They’re either in your hands or in your mouth” comment with “Just like genitals”. Even just the odd way Tracy pronounced “genitals” is hilarious in itself.
— So many laughs throughout the Tracy/Jon interview.
— I love the line about Maya being the voice of the tambourine-playing ostrich from the Chuck E. Cheese animatronic stage show.
— The musical performance at the end with Jon and Maya is giving me a lot of laughs.
STARS: ****
WE WERE SOLDIERS THAT KNEW WHAT WOMEN WANT
an odd Mel Gibson (host) film
— A funny hybrid of two completely different Mel Gibson movies.
— Wow, Dean has been having a fairly active night in this episode, for his standards.
— Very broad stereotypical Asian accents from Maya and Ana, though something about the goofy, dumb, somewhat-fun nature of this general sketch makes those Asian stereotypes come off a little passable, even if this sketch in general isn’t quite as hilarious as I had remembered it being.
STARS: ***
MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “Ready For Love”
MY BIG THICK NOVEL BY JACK HANDEY
mulling a cliff jump in chapter 677
GOODNIGHTS
IMMEDIATE POST-SHOW THOUGHTS
— A great episode, and definitely one of the best of the season. Every sketch in this episode worked for me, and there were lots of strong segments that received four or five-star ratings from me. Jon Stewart was also a great host as expected. Also, unlike the Josh Hartnett episode earlier this season, Will Ferrell’s absence did not negatively affect the show. In fact, I surprisingly didn’t even notice his absence in any of the sketches while watching the episode, which goes to show how solid this episode was.
MY PERSONAL CHOICE OF “BEST OF” MOMENTS FOR THIS EPISODE, REPRESENTED WITH SCREENCAPS
HOW THIS EPISODE STACKS UP AGAINST THE PRECEDING ONE (Jonny Moseley)
a big step up
My full set of screencaps for this episode is here
TOMORROW
Ian McKellen