Segments are rated on a scale of 1-5 stars
THE NEW IRAQI GOVERNMENT
George W. Bush (DAH) details Iraq’s new undemocratic constitution
— Oh, what the hell are you doing, SNL?!? ANOTHER presidential address-to-the-nation cold opening with Darrell’s horrible Bush impression, after you just did one TWO EPISODES AGO???
— Now Darrell has “enhanced” his impression by adding in a “leaning to the side” pose, lots of arm mannerisms, and lots of vocal inflections. It’s doing NOTHING to stop this from being an embarrassingly bad impression. In fact, seeing Darrell desperately do all of these ridiculous poses, mannerisms, and vocal inflections to try to put his impression over, and failing miserably, just makes it even sadder.
— Just like last time he played Bush, Darrell has that stupid smirk on his face, though it’s not quite as prominent as it was last time. I still don’t know what he’s going for with the smirk.
— Also just like last time, this cold opening is DEATH. Absolutely no laughs from me, not just because of Darrell’s horrible impression, but also because of horrible writing that not even Will Ferrell would’ve been able to save.
— The only positive thing I can say is that this thankfully ends up being the final appearance of Darrell’s Bush impression. After only two appearances from his impression, SNL would re-cast the role ONCE AGAIN later this season. Darrell’s Bush would end up going down in SNL history as possibly the worst presidential impression ever seen on the show. Even Darrell himself would later admit what a misfire his Bush was, calling it “the Waterloo of my career”.
STARS: *
MONOLOGUE
when co-star host fails to self-promote, MIM plugs The Cat In The Hat
— WTF? Jimmy and Horatio in the SNL Band? Oh, lord, what horror am I in for THIS time?
— Dammit, now we get Jimmy and Horatio taking over this entire monologue while acting like obnoxious jackasses, which they’re given free rein to do too damn often. The fact that it’s an Alec Baldwin monologue this is happening in feels especially wrong.
— Well, at least we get a surprise Mike Myers cameo.
— Ugh, the running gag with Mike constantly dropping character to plug The Cat In The Hat has not aged well, though I remember this bit kinda rubbed me the wrong way even when tonight’s episode originally aired. Almost nothing in this monologue is working for me.
STARS: *½
HUGGIES THONG
— Rerun from 10/4/03.
— During the beginning of this re-airing, you can hear audio of what sounds like excited audience members yelling “MIKE!” in the studio, apparently trying to get Mike Myers’ attention right after the monologue ended.
PLASTIC SURGEON
unprofessional plastic surgeon (host) recommends D cups for patient (AMP)
— I recall hearing this sketch was cut from the preceding season’s Ray Romano episode.
— I like this non-sequitur exchange between Alec and Amy, during their discussion of breast augmentations: “Do you know Catherine Bell from JAG?” “No.” “Damn. I was really hoping to meet her.”
— Amy sternly warning Alec “I am only gonna stay here for a few more jokes!” is very funny.
— Alec is solid in this inappropriate role, though I can’t help but wonder what this sketch was like with Ray Romano. I can picture him being great in Alec’s role too.
STARS: ***½
ZINGER VS. BURNS
scientists (host) & Dave ‘Zinger’ Klinger (SEM) trade childish gibes
— The debut of this character of Seth’s.
— Surprisingly, this ends up being Maya’s only appearance all night, and it’s just a straight role in which she only has about two lines.
— Seth’s zinger routine did nothing for me for the first minute of this sketch, but Alec suddenly coming in and doing the same basic routine as Seth had me laughing out loud. I guess it’s all in the performance. Alec is just better at this type of material than Seth is, in my opinion.
— Some laughs from how extensive Alec and Seth are getting in their burn/zing routines.
— I like Chris having such disdain for Alec and Seth’s burn/zing routines, but treating it so seriously that he demands Alec and Seth do a best-of-three burn/zing-off to declare a winner.
— Okay, this whole burn/zing gimmick is starting to run out of steam for me, though the performances from Alec and even Seth are fun.
STARS: **½
THE TONY BENNETT SHOW
acquitted millionaire Robert Durst (FRA)
— This sketch has officially become recurring.
— Like last time, we’re getting so many hilarious one-liners from Alec’s Tony Bennett.
— I don’t know why, but the characterization Fred is doing for his Robert Durst impression feels kinda Christopher Guest-esque to me. Not sure what it is about Fred’s performance that makes me feel that way.
— Hilarious promo that Alec’s Bennett does for for Stayfree Maxi-Pads.
— Funny bit with Bennett getting Richie Sambora to “apologize” to him.
— Is EVERY character of Horatio’s now going to be a character written to be very giggly? Is this SNL’s way of trying to hide Horatio’s natural giggliness? Horatio’s at least playing his role in this particular sketch like a normal person, and not treating it as one of his typical over-the-top roles.
STARS: ****
GAYSTROGEN
Another rerun tonight, this time from 10/18/03
THE FALCONER
Donald has a wild night in Las Vegas while The Falconer hangs upside down
— Good to see this sketch make its first appearance of the season. Believe it or not, this ends up being the ONLY Falconer sketch of this entire season. Quite odd, after how frequently this sketch appeared the preceding season.
— The Falconer, while hanging upside-down: “For four days, I have dangled here like a urine-soaked pinata.”
— I love the visual of Donald the Falcon seeing a “Knives, axes… Anything store (We specialize in rope cutting)” and a casino located on opposite sides of each other, then deciding to go to the casino instead of the Knives store which would’ve been convenient in getting The Falconer out of his trap.
— A hilarious cocaine sequence with Donald the Falcon. I especially like his crazed, rapid, increasingly higher-pitched squawking after snorting the cocaine.
— Nice touch with how the traditional ending title card of The Falconer has his usual photo flipped upside-down tonight, to match how he has been hanging upside-down for the entire sketch.
STARS: ****½
MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “Pass That Dutch”
WEEKEND UPDATE
riding Paris Hilton’s coattails, WLF shows his own night vision sex tape
TIF mistakes phone interviewee Christian Slater (JIF) for Jack Nicholson
— Wow, Tina’s Al Gore joke gets booed from somebody in the audience.
— Great to see Will doing an Update commentary as himself.
— Hearing Will speak in his normal voice here, I notice he sounds a tad “country”. Isn’t he from California, though?
— Will’s Paris Hilton-esque sex tape is a riot. Not sure that ending with Fred was necessary, though.
— A good Christian Slater vocal impression from Jimmy. Also, I’m finding the ridiculous back-and-forth Slater/Jack Nicholson fake-out to be pretty funny.
— A somewhat short Update. At least they finally managed to get through an Update without a derailing appearance from Horatio, for the first time since the second episode of this season.
STARS: ***
PRESS CONFERENCE
(host) answers euphemistic questions linking Prince Charles with gay sex
— Fun British accents from Alec and the cast.
— Despite being a cavalcade of cheap puns about gay sex, these are actually coming off fun, funny, and well-delivered.
— Seth’s double entendre about Prince Charles wanting his “crack” to be filled with “caulk” feels like a precursor to a sketch that Jason Lee would later do in season 31 that’s in the vein of dirty wordplay sketches like Colonel Angus and Cork Soakers.
STARS: ***½
KEEN CORPORATION
co-workers (host) & (AMP) flub a presentation after a one-night stand
— Not caring for this cliched premise.
— Okay, Alec’s line about how even his mother looks like Jewel after he’s had 10 drinks was pretty funny.
— I like Alec’s delivery of “So frickin’ what?!?” after revealing to his co-workers all the wrong things he and Amy did last night.
— For some reason, Amy loses it and busts out laughing very loudly during her and Alec’s passionate make-out session on the table.
— A somewhat weak ending with Seth and Rachel.
STARS: **
MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “Work It”
ROY RETURNS
Roy Horn’s (host) return to the stage is beset by more animal attacks
— Hoo, boy. I remember this being kind of a notorious sketch, with some SNL fans considering it really tasteless that SNL would make light of Roy Horn’s tragic attack in such a manner.
— A funny visual of Amy as a beehive-haired lady among people in the crowd getting splattered with blood from off-camera.
— Good lord at the turtle/eye scene.
— Wh… what? THAT’S the entire sketch?!? This sketch felt almost completely pointless, and the turtle/eye scene sure was one weak punchline. Something felt almost season 20-esque about this sketch.
STARS: *½
SCHEINWALD STUDIOS
pandering studio mogul Abe Scheinwald (RAD) scares off director (FRA)
— Here’s another sketch tonight that was cut from an episode from a previous season, this one being cut from the Jon Stewart episode all the way back in season 27. I think I recall hearing Jon Stewart played the role that Fred’s playing in tonight’s version, while the role that Alec’s playing wasn’t in the Jon Stewart version of the sketch.
— Seth has been all over tonight’s episode.
— Funny walk-on from Rachel’s Abe Scheinwald character, making his debut.
— Alec seems to be playing a Robert Evans pastiche.
— Some pretty funny lines from Rachel and Alec all throughout this sketch.
— After something Rachel did just now, all of the performers except Alec are fighting to keep a straight face.
— As this sketch ends and the screen holds on a shot of all of the performers, you can hear audio of the Tel-e-link commercial from this season’s Halle Berry episode start to play, but it soon gets cut off as an SNL bumper photo of Alec appears onscreen. I guess people in the SNL control room realized at literally the last second that there’s not enough time to re-air the Tel-e-link commercial, so they had to quickly abort it on the air after cueing it up. A sloppy moment that you don’t often see happening on SNL. Also, if that Tel-e-link commercial had aired tonight, it would’ve been the THIRD repeated fake ad in tonight’s episode, which might’ve been an all-time record.
STARS: ***½
GOODNIGHTS
IMMEDIATE POST-SHOW THOUGHTS
— One of the more average Alec Baldwin episodes. Not bad, but definitely doesn’t stand out among Alec’s roster of episodes. There were still a few solid highlights, though, and Alec added his usual professional-but-fun atmosphere to the show.
MY PERSONAL CHOICE OF “BEST OF” MOMENTS FOR THIS EPISODE, REPRESENTED WITH SCREENCAPS
HOW THIS EPISODE STACKS UP AGAINST THE PRECEDING ONE (Andy Roddick)
about the same
My full set of screencaps for this episode is here
TOMORROW
Rev. Al Sharpton