Month: May 2020

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October 2, 2004 – Ben Affleck / Nelly (S30 E1)

Segments are rated on a scale of 1-5 stars

FIRST PRESIDENTIAL DEBATE
first George W. Bush (WLF) vs. John Kerry (SEM) debate covers Iraq policy

— A decent opening spiel from Chris’ Jim Lehrer about the presidential candidates wearing a collar to keep them both from walking to the other’s podium.
— To quote something I said in my review of the Bush Sr./Dukakis presidential debate sketch from the season 14 premiere: “The gag with Bush being on a higher platform than Dukakis as they shake each other’s hand after making their entrance would later be copied in a George W. Bush/John Kerry debate sketch in 2004. The gag didn’t even make sense in that context! It made sense here because Dukakis is much shorter than Bush Sr., whereas neither Kerry nor Bush Jr. are short.” It really irks me that they ripped off that Bush Sr./Dukakis height difference gag in tonight’s debate sketch. I know both debate sketches were written by Jim Downey (or at least, I’m assuming they were), but that doesn’t excuse him recycling his own gag, especially since, as I said in the quote, it makes no sense in this context.
— We get the debut of Will’s whinier version of President Bush, which would go on to be the most remembered aspect of Will’s impression.
— Oof. I am now SEVEN MINUTES into this debate sketch, and I have not been laughing much. Bush’s repeated “We’re workin’ haaarrrrrd” has literally been the ONLY part of this very long debate sketch that resonated with me over the years, and that has not changed so far during my current re-watch. And even that “We’re workin’ haaarrrrrd” aspect of this is relied on way too heavily here, as if that’s the only hook Jim Downey could come up with for spoofing Bush here, besides the short bit with Bush praising Saddam Hussein.
— There are absolutely no “Strategery”-esque legendary moments to be found in this presidential debate sketch. No “I can’t believe I’m losing to this guy”-esque legendary moments”. No “It was my understanding that there would be no math”-esque legendary moments.
— Oh, man, this cold opening is just going on and on. Sure, SNL’s presidential debate sketches are typically very long, but more often than not, they’re consistently funny enough to excuse the length and make the time pass by fast. With a dull, lacking debate sketch like tonight’s, on the other hand, the long time length is fully felt.
— Seth and Will seem to be tripping over some lines throughout this.
— I finally got one other good laugh besides Will-as-Bush’s first “We’re workin’ haaarrrrrd” (before that line got run into the ground), and it’s from Seth-as-Kerry’s “That is not flip-flopping, that is pandering! And America deserves a president that knows the difference!”
— Oh, god, I swear, if Will’s Bush says “Workin’ haaarrrrrd” one more time, I’m going to fucking snap. This sketch has gotten to the point where the “Workin’ haaarrrrrd” stuff has become literally the ONLY material they’re having Will’s Bush do anymore. They took a once-funny line and completely ruined it over the course of a single cold opening.
— 13 minutes. This cold opening is just now concluding, after 13 minutes. 13 fucking minutes, people. Not even the first Bush/Gore debate cold opening was that long, and THAT cold opening had actual funny things to say.
— Overall, my god, what a huge disappointment this debate sketch was. A rare flop at this point in SNL history for such a big presidential debate sketch.
STARS: *½


OPENING MONTAGE
— New montage.

— The SNL logo is still the same from the past 9 seasons, but it’s been slightly modified to have far more spacing between the letters (as seen in the second above screencap for this montage).
— Speaking of the SNL logo, there surprisingly isn’t a number 30 added to it to commemorate the 30th season. I wonder why, considering SNL has added an anniversary number to the SNL logo for every other anniversary season ever since season 15.
— After the very unique, fun, and memorable music video style of the preceding season’s opening montage, SNL has gone back to a more standard style. Despite the standard, generic style of this montage, I actually really like the aesthetic of it, with the dark motif and very “late night” feel.
— Fred Armisen has been promoted from featured player to repertory player.
— When announcing Will Forte’s name, Don Pardo mistakenly says “Will Ferr–”, then suddenly cuts himself off and never corrects himself. Don obviously almost called Will Forte “Will Ferrell” before catching his mistake. This is reminiscent of a moment from an episode in the preceding season, where Don mistakenly announced Chris Parnell as “Chris Kattan”, but at least Don corrected himself during THAT particular goof.
— Rob Riggle has been added to the cast tonight.
— This overall montage feels A LOT shorter than the preceding season’s montage.


MONOLOGUE
Alec Baldwin [real] warns host against stealing his moves

— Right out of the gate, Ben Affleck immediately addresses how unusually soon he’s hosting after his last episode, by saying “You’re not watching a rerun. Yes, I did host just five minutes ago.”
— Oh, is that Alec Baldwin’s voice I’m hearing from off-camera?
— Yep, there he is.
— Some good laughs from Alec’s comparisons between himself and Ben.
— Great delivery from Ben of the line “Those aren’t moves, Alec. They’re just the slow-motion trainwreck I like to call my life.”
— Alec to Ben: “Don’t jerk me around, Gigli!”
— I’m finding Alec to be an absolute RIOT in this monologue.
— Alec: “Mike Myers will suck your soul out, then complain about how bad it tastes.” Haha, goddamn. IIRC, Tina would later disclose the fact that she ended up getting chewed out over the phone by an angry Mike Myers, who called up SNL to complain about that soul-sucking line in this monologue. This whole incident is very reminiscent of the notorious Eddie Murphy/David Spade incident. Unlike that, however, where David’s mean-spirited comment about Eddie is still left intact in reruns, SNL would be forced to remove the Mike Myers slam from reruns of this monologue.
— Just now, Alec brags to Ben that he’s hosted 9 times. Odd, considering it’s actually 11 times Alec has hosted up to this point.
— Alec to Ben: “Don’t get too comfortable. Me and Goodman are constantly circling the building every five minutes.”
— An overall strong monologue, with a great performance from Alec.
— At dress rehearsal, Darrell played Alec instead of Alec showing up as himself. I even recall seeing a publicity photo years ago at NBC.com from this version of the monologue (the photo can probably currently be found at GettyImages), and in the photo, Darrell’s not even wearing a wig or anything to look like Alec! Darrell just has his normal slicked-back gray hair, which looks nothing like how Alec’s hair looks at this time. I wonder if Alec not being able to show up for dress rehearsal was perhaps something that happened on VERY short notice, and so SNL was forced to just throw Darrell out there in Alec’s place at the last minute to read off his lines for this monologue, with SNL not even bothering to put him in costume. If so, I’m morbidly curious to see just how bad this monologue HAD to have been with an out-of-place Darrell delivering Alec’s funny dialogue.
STARS: ****


DR. PORKENHEIMER’S BONER JUICE
Dr. Porkenheimer’s Boner Juice emphatically reverses erectile dysfunction

— Meh, a juvenile concept, and not a particularly funny one.
— A particularly cheap attempt at laughs right now, with the ending shot of a satisfied Rob Riggle “pitching a tent” under the bedsheets. I remember that made me laugh a lot when this originally aired, but I can’t even so much as crack a smile at it today. I may be biased, though, because, after the entirety of this SNL season originally aired and I walked away from it feeling the season was a quiet disaster, I would go on to look at this commercial as an embodiment of the bad and lazy humor that dominated this frustrating season.
— This commercial would go on to be re-aired in a few episodes, and IIRC, the aforementioned ending shot of Rob “pitching a tent” under the bedsheets would be replaced by various new and far tamer alternate endings that changed EVERY time this commercial was re-aired in a new episode. Am I remembering correctly? I recall there being at least two different alternate endings used in future re-airings. I guess I’ll see for myself when I cover the episodes that this commercial is re-aired in.
STARS: *½


DEBBIE DOWNER
Debbie Downer kills the festive mood at (host)’s birthday party

— Oh, god. This sketch has officially become recurring, a decision I strongly disagree with, for reasons I explained at the end of my review of the legendary first Debbie Downer sketch.
— Okay, after not laughing for tonight’s Debbie Downer sketch so far, I do kinda like the part right now with the camera doing several mini-zoom-ins on Debbie Downer as she lists off the name of each of the latest tropical storms.
— After being into this sketch at first, the studio audience is noticeably laughing less and less as this sketch progresses. Man, this sketch is dying. Without the performers’ epic laughing meltdown from the first Debbie Downer installment, this sketch’s formula is exposed for how weak and annoyingly repetitive it is.
— Did they have to repeat the “It’s the number one killer of domestic cats (*meow meooooowwww*)” line from the first Debbie Downer installment?
— Overall, boy, this sketch did absolutely NOTHING for me, aside from the aforementioned tropical storms bit. Why couldn’t SNL have just left a classic one-off sketch alone? This reminds me a lot of how, 10 years earlier, the season premiere of the notorious season 20 made the mistake of doing a second installment of the classic first Buh-Bye sketch, and even placed it in an early spot in the show, expecting it to be another hit, only for it to fall HORRIBLY flat and die a painful death. At least in that case, however, SNL learned from their mistake and didn’t do any more Buh-Bye installments after that. With Debbie Downer, on the other hand, I have god-knows-how-many more installments to put up with after this episode.
— This sketch would later be replaced with the dress rehearsal version in reruns, which is even prefaced with a disclaimer stating, from what I can remember, “The following sketch is from dress rehearsal, simply because it worked better”, which is noteworthy, as I don’t think there have been any other instances in SNL history where a rerun actually pointed out a dress rehearsal substitution for a sketch. The reason for a dress rehearsal substitution of this particular Debbie Downer sketch is because the dress version features a lot of breaking from the performers (though definitely not as much as the famous first Debbie Downer sketch), which the audience, of course, loved. The use of the dress version of this sketch in reruns and it actually being pointed out with a disclaimer is clearly SNL fully admitting how much of a failure the live version of this sketch was. IIRC, the dress version of this sketch shown in reruns is also (rightfully) moved to a much later spot in the show than the live version of the sketch was.
STARS: *½


SWIFT BOAT VETERANS FOR TRUTH
Swift Boat Veterans expand their list of John Kerry’s deficiencies

— The unnecessary reliance on a gay marriage reference for a cheap laugh is so sadly typical of this era, and an unfortunate harbinger of how particularly heavy this season will be relying on hacky, gay-stereotype humor.
— This commercial is slowly getting funnier and funnier as it goes along.
— I love the little detail of how Will’s only credential listed on the bottom of the screen is “saw ‘Platoon’”. That makes me wonder if the guys who were shown being interviewed before him also had a funny credential listed on the bottom of the screen, and I just didn’t notice.
— A priceless dry delivery from Will of the word “catsup”.
— Overall, this was a good political piece, but it wasn’t quite as strong or as smart as I had remembered.
STARS: ***½


CAMPAIGN STOP
James Carville (host) wants John Kerry (SEM) to go on the offensive

— The two sketches in tonight’s episode that have Seth playing John Kerry end up being Seth’s ONLY appearances all night, which is surprising, especially knowing in retrospect how hard this season is going to be pushing Seth as the new male star of the show in light of Jimmy Fallon’s departure.
— Oh, no. Maya’s Theresa Heinz-Kerry breaking out into a brief song was just plain unnecessary and unfunny. This is yet ANOTHER unfortunate harbinger of what’s to come this season, as this season is going to be relying particularly hard on Maya singing in sketches, much to my chagrin back when this season originally aired.
— James Carville to John Kerry: “You beat George Bush in a talking contest. That’s like Wilt Chamberlain playing basketball against Stephen Hawking and beat him by ten points. The man can’t talk, John!”
— Ben is fucking fantastic as James Carville. He is slaying me all throughout this sketch. I think I like his impression even more than Bill Hader’s Carville impression from years later, and that’s saying something, as Bill’s Carville is great in its own right.
— I remember it being pointed out by several online SNL fans back when this originally aired that Seth can be seen mouthing Ben’s lines throughout this sketch.
— I know I said in a recent episode review that I’ve gotten burned out on Darrell’s Bill Clinton, but it’s winning me back over here, now that they’ve finally taken him out of the Weekend Update setting he was stuck in during the preceding season.
STARS: ****


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest & Jaheim [real] perform “My Place”


WEEKEND UPDATE
New Jerseyan Tony Soprano (James Gandolfini) on Jim McGreevey resignation

host points out hypocrisy of Matt Damon’s call for integrity in acting

Elton John’s (HOS) songs fail to make amends for his behavior in Taiwan

— A new Weekend Update era has begun, with Amy joining as Tina’s new co-anchor.
— I like the new Update opening title sequence.
— Just-departed cast member Jimmy Fallon does the voice-over in the new Update opening title sequence (probably because Amy previously did the voice-over for the Update opening title sequence during most of the Fallon/Fey era), and him doing this voice-over in the style of “hyper young cool dude” instead of “professional news broadcast voice-over” is SO WRONG for Update. Hell, he even literally shouts an excited “Yaaaay!” at the end of his voice-over here! I kid you not, folks. WTF??? Thankfully, SNL would remove that “Yaaaay!” from the title sequence of all subsequent Fey/Poehler Updates.
— They’re still using the Update set from the Fallon/Fey era, but something about it’s color has definitely changed. It looks…I don’t know, glossier? A different shade of brown? SOMETHING looks different about the coloring of the set, but I can’t put my finger on what exactly it is.
— A terrible opening Bush joke from Tina. As I said in a review from late in the preceding season, Tina’s developed a bad habit lately of using her worst and most desperate joke of the night as her opening joke.
— Amy’s very first Update joke just now wasn’t bad, but she kinda ruined it for me by making an out-of-place cutesy, hammy big smile at the camera immediately after she finished the joke.
— Oh, god, and now, right after what I said above about Amy’s first joke, Amy actually interrupts Tina’s next joke to giddily cheer “That was my first joke!”, which Tina then responds to by joining in on Amy’s giddiness and motioning the audience to actually APPLAUD Amy for doing her first joke. Are you fucking kidding me?!? In all my years of watching SNL, I’ve never seen a new Update anchor basically BEG the audience to freakin’ applaud the fact that they got through their very first Update joke, as if they’re a child. Ugh, this new Fey/Poehler Update team is already starting off very worrisome for me.
— The use of clips of real footage from the presidential debate feels unusual for Update at this point of SNL’s run, but would go on to be a semi-regular aspect of Fey/Poehler Updates. I remember how some online SNL fans back at this time in 2004/2005 complained about SNL trying too hard to be like The Daily Show with their new gimmick of commenting on clips of real news footage. I think SNL fans would later go on to get used to seeing that more often on Update nowadays, with Colin Jost and Michael Che often playing clips of Trump saying stupid shit.
— Nice surprise appearance from James Gandolfini as “a New Jersey resident”. I’m enjoying his performance here.
— I like Tina’s remark after Gandolfini leaves: “That is the scariest man…I have ever been attracted to.”
— Amy seems to be trying way too hard in her delivery of some jokes.
— Just now, Tina has mentioned her former co-anchor Jimmy Fallon in a jokingly unflattering manner, when telling Amy she thinks things are going to work out well between her and Amy as a new Update duo.
— A rarity to see a host do an Update commentary as themselves, or, as Ben’s billed here in a tongue-in-cheek manner, “a Hollywood actor”. Between Gandolfini being billed as “a New Jersey resident” and now Ben being billed as “a Hollywood actor”, are none of the Update guests going to be using a name anymore in this new Update era?
— I liked Ben’s self-deprecating joke about making movies with his girlfriend.
— I’m surprised Ben’s commentary is ALREADY over, after only about one minute. Most of his commentary surprisingly didn’t do much for me.
— Ugh, Horatio’s Elton John.
— Another acknowledgment of Jimmy Fallon’s departure, with Horatio’s Elton John starting his commentary by looking around confusedly and asking “Where’s my Jimmy boy?”
— Blah, these Elton John songs from Horatio are not working for me AT ALL. Just typical self-indulgent hammy Horatio Sanz crap with bad writing.
— Overall, all I can say about this inaugural Update of the Fey/Poehler era is: oof. Normally, if a new Update duo has a rough start, I’d think “Maybe they just need time to grow.” But I’ve already seen all of the Fey/Poehler Updates back when they originally aired, and I recall their Updates drawing A LOT of ire from me in how weak, annoying, frustrating, and unprofessional they were. So, yeah, I don’t think things ever get better for this Update duo, but I’ll see as I go through this era.
STARS: **


ESCALATOR
stalled mall escalator proves disastrous for overly dramatic shoppers

— Good mock-dramatic, over-the-top, disaster-movie-esque performances from the cast in the way their characters are overreacting to a simple broken-down escalator.
— They’re overdoing Ben’s slaps to Rachel WAY too much. It was only funny the first time.
— I love Chris giving up and committing suicide by jumping off the escalator.
— Rachel’s long, exaggerated yell of “NO!” causes Ben to break character by laughing. This has made me realize that we’ve gotten little-to-no instances of breaking from Ben before this point in tonight’s episode compared to his episode from the preceding season, in which he laughed in practically every single sketch.
— Ben’s Spanish conversation with Maya is pretty funny.
— I got a good laugh from Will’s fireman character accidentally falling from the rope holding him.
— An overall solid and fun sketch. Much better than I remember it being in my past viewings.
STARS: ****


WEDDING
obnoxious deejay’s (host) inappropriate tunes derail a wedding reception

— Not too crazy about this cliched “obnoxious DJ at a dignified gathering” concept.
— Rob Riggle’s been stuck in nothing but dull straight roles for the entirety of this first episode of his. An unfortunate harbinger (which is something I’ve been saying A LOT in this review) of things to come for him in what would end up being a short-lived SNL tenure.
— A good laugh from Ben playing the song “Sister Christian” during the priest’s speech.
— Ben to the priest: “Alright, father, stay away from the kiddie tables, alright?”
— Despite my dislike of this cliched premise, Ben’s giving this his all as he always does, and there are a few laughs.
— When Amy and Rob complain about Ben playing “Who Let The Dogs Out” instead of the slow song they wanted to dance to, I like Ben complying by slowing down the tempo of “Who Let The Dogs Out”.
— This sketch is going on too long, and should’ve ended earlier.
STARS: **½


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “Na-Nana-Na”


A NIGHT AT CAMP DAVID
by Alison Jackson- a dramatization of Bush substance abuse at Camp David

— Much like the “Adventures of Harold” short film in the preceding season’s finale, we get a huge change of pace for this SNL era, with another out-of-the-ordinary film that involves no recognizable performers. This particular film is by Alison Jackson, who was hired to be SNL’s regular filmmaker of this season. However, tonight’s film ends up being the ONLY film of hers to ever make it on the air, aside from a pre-taped Weekend Update mini-piece that airs later this season. Most of Jackson’s attempts to get films on the air this season end up not making it past dress rehearsal.
— I really like the unique aesthetic of this, as well as the music, but I have not been enjoying this film itself all that much.
— Overall, I give SNL credit for trying something completely unlike anything they had ever done before, and I liked certain individual aspects of this film, but the film as a whole didn’t really entertain me like it should’ve. I think I can see why Alison Jackson’s attempts to be SNL’s regular filmmaker of this season ended up failing, but I still say SNL should’ve aired a second film of hers, just so we could judge the quality of her as an SNL filmmaker more fairly.
STARS: **


GOODNIGHTS

IMMEDIATE POST-SHOW THOUGHTS
— A weak and disappointing season premiere, immediately showing signs of how troubled this infamous-among-hardcore-SNL-nerds-but-forgotten-among-general-SNL-fans season is going to be. That interminably dull and one-note Bush/Kerry debate cold opening already got the night off on the wrong foot, and the episode as a whole never fully took off, despite some solid bright spots here and there. A very tepid and worrisome debut of a new Weekend Update era also didn’t help. Ben Affleck was a strong host once again, but he’s definitely been given much better episodes before and after this.


MY PERSONAL CHOICE OF “BEST OF” MOMENTS FOR THIS EPISODE, REPRESENTED WITH SCREENCAPS


HOW THIS EPISODE STACKS UP AGAINST THE PRECEDING SEASON (2003-04)
a slight step down


My full set of screencaps for this episode is here


TOMORROW
Queen Latifah

Posted on

May 15, 2004 – Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen / J-Kwon (S29 E20)

Segments are rated on a scale of 1-5 stars

HARDBALL WITH CHRIS MATTHEWS
John Kerry (SEM) chooses Al Sharpton (KET) as his running mate

— Kinda interesting how Chris is playing Andrew Card in this season finale’s Hardball cold opening, given the fact that Dan Aykroyd previously played him in the Hardball cold opening from the preceding year’s season finale.
— Chris Matthews to Andrew Card, regarding Card’s over-the-top glowing comments about President Bush: “Man, oh, man. You didn’t just drink the Kool-Aid – you went back for seconds.”
— A good laugh from Darrell’s Matthews being caught putting a noose around his neck while listening to Seth’s John Kerry drone on and on.
— Overall, a little better than the forgettably average Hardball sketches from this season, but still not up to the level of great Hardballs from previous seasons. I eagerly await the addition of Will’s Zell Miller to Hardball the following season, to inject some new life into these sketches.
STARS: ***½


MONOLOGUE
JIF & WLF help simulate the senior prom hosts are unable to attend

— Okay, right out of the gate here, the Olsen Twins have established that Ashley is the blonde one and Mary-Kate is the brunette. I have to remember that, as this episode is the first time I’ve ever had to deal with seeing an episode hosted by identical twins, and I’ve NEVER been able to tell the difference between the Olsens in anything I’ve seen them appear together in.
— Big applause for Jimmy’s walk-on, as it’s known that tonight is his final episode.
— Cute concept of bringing the Olsen Twins’ school prom to them here at SNL, since they’re missing their prom to host the show.
— I love Fred’s cheesy dad character suddenly going from laughing heartily to telling Jimmy a very stern “You touch my daughter, I’ll kill ya.”
— When the prom decorations, including a banner, are lowered from the ceiling, the banner instantly breaks off by accident. (seen in the background of the two below screencaps)

— I see Maya is taking over the recently-departed Jeff Richards’ duties as Drunk Girl. Maya’s drunken character in this monologue is eerily similar.
— Will: “A bunch of us are gonna go into a black neighborhood and try to buy wine.”
STARS: ***½


PAPARAZZI
(hosts) & fellow red carpet paparazza engineer marketable snapshots

— Oh, god. Not a return of this Paparazzi sketch from this season’s Jennifer Aniston episode, a sketch that I hated. And I also hate how these sketches always have to be placed right up top as the first post-monologue sketch of the night.
— I did get a laugh just now from a request Amy shouts out: “Marc Anthony, pretend you’re a genie comin’ out of J.Lo’s butt!”
— Much like Jennifer Aniston in the first installment, the Olsen Twins attempt some self-deprecating humor as their paparazzi characters throw unflattering questions at the passing-by Olsen Twins. And much like Aniston’s attempt at that, it’s doing absolutely nothing for me.
— Amy, regarding what appears to be a passing-by Dakota Fanning: “That’s not Dakota Fanning, that’s David Spade.” Wow, this is the SECOND time this season made a slam at Spade. Ha, I know it’s nothing but good-natured ribbing at one of the show’s own alum, but I still think this is Spade’s karma for his infamous Eddie Murphy slam (and maybe also for all his harsh Hollywood Minute jokes in general).
— Overall, I got a few more chuckles than I got in the first installment of this sketch, but I still disliked most of this installment, and am glad to never have to review any more installments of this.
STARS: **


MARY-KATE & ASHLEY
Ashley & Mary-Kate fragrances purport to capture hosts’ personalities

— Some pretty good laughs from how increasingly absurd and out-of-hand the voice-over from Chris is getting in his details of each perfume.
— Pretty funny ending with the wind from an off-camera fan starting to blow out of control.
STARS: ***½


Z105
Joey Mack’s shameless foolery gives listeners a poor opinion of hosts

— Our final appearance of this sketch. Should’ve left the preceding installment with Ben Affleck as the final appearance, as that would’ve been a perfect way to conclude this series of sketches.
— What’s with the VERY awkward and long pause Jimmy made right before starting to tell the dog crap story? There was a long stretch of painful dead air as Jimmy looked completely lost on what he was supposed to do, before he finally started telling the story. This is an about-to-depart six-season SNL veteran I’m watching?!?
— I admit to getting a laugh from the very un-PC part with Z105’s black weatherman claiming that the only reason Z105’s Middle Eastern intern Sanji liked the movie New York Minute is because it was set in New York and was a bomb.
— Wow, an EXTREMELY intense “And we’re BACK!” from Jimmy’s Joey Mack just now, and you can tell Jimmy delivered it like that because he knows that’s the last time he’ll ever be delivering that catchphrase.
— The ending felt a little abrupt. Either that, or SNL accidentally cued the “Applause” lights too early.
— Overall, some laughs, but I’m a little meh on this final Z105 sketch. This just treaded the same ground from most installments of this sketch, and tonight’s paled in comparison to the aforementioned Ben Affleck installment, which refreshingly did something new with the formula.
STARS: **½


THE SWAN
one-legged Amber loses makeover competition to Vicki (hosts)

FOX newswoman (RAD) teases scare-inducing story slated for WNYW broadcast

— I got a laugh from Chris-as-the-doctor’s unprofessional “fugly” comment about the Olsen Twin’s character (I don’t know which Olsen Twin is in this role, due to the wig she’s wearing).
— We haven’t seen Amy’s one-legged Amber character in what feels like quite a while. I recall starting to get tired of this character in her last appearance, but maybe the hiatus since then will make her come off fresher tonight.
— The voice Rachel’s using sounds EXACTLY like local news reporters, and her fast-paced, over-the-top, fear-mongering news report here is very funny.
— The mirror sequence with both Olsen Twins is fun and a clever way to incorporate both Olsen Twins into this sketch.
— Given that the preceding Z105 sketch relied heavily on fart humor as usual, it was a poor decision on SNL’s part to place this Swan sketch immediately after it, as the usual gag with one-legged Amber farting (which thankfully wasn’t used until towards the end of this sketch) feels badly redundant and unfortunate coming right after Z105.
STARS: ***


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “Tipsy”


WEEKEND UPDATE
thinking of Brad Pitt causes JIF to slip into gayety during Troy review

Olympic stadium contractor (HOS) admits that Athens venue isn’t ready

— Jimmy’s final Weekend Update.
— I’ve gotten so tired of Tina’s Arnold Schwarzenegger vocal imitation whenever she does a joke about him.
— Blah, not caring for Jimmy’s increasingly-effeminate-voiced review of the movie Troy, as I’m just finding it to be yet another typical display of the cheap stereotypical gay humor that’s rampant in this SNL era. I do admit that I did kinda like Tina interrupting Jimmy’s Troy review to sternly whisper to him, “Jimmy, TV voice!”
— We get our final callback to the long-recurring Jimmy-punches-Tina “Fight Club” bit from some of the prior Fallon/Fey Updates, and Tina even wistfully points out to Jimmy “That may be the last time you hit me”, before tricking Jimmy by suddenly punching him.
— Well, I guess it was obligatory that Jimmy’s final Update features a commentary from Horatio. (*sigh*) You know how I feel about these Fallon/Sanz Update pieces, but at least this is the last time I’ll have to endure this.
— Yep, and there goes the obligatory loose Fallon/Sanz ad-libbing and laughing. I admit, as much I don’t care for it, I’m finding a slight charm to it here, knowing this is Jimmy’s final Update. I’ll let Jimmy have his fun here.
— A laugh from Horatio’s character slyly trying to pass off “Stadium Construction” as an Olympic event.
— As an SNL nerd, I like how Horatio’s commentary ends with him imitating the catchphrases from both the Olympia Cafe and Hub’s Gyros recurring sketches from SNL’s past.
— A nice farewell message that Jimmy delivers during his sign-off at the end of this Update, and I love the poignant touch of him subverting his usual trademark of throwing his pencil towards the camera by actually placing the pencil inside his jacket pocket this time.
STARS: **½


PAT ‘N PATTI’S BACKPACK SHACK
crackerjack sack flacks yak

— Oof, I am not liking this corny humor AT ALL. What the hell is this kind of thing doing on SNL? I think I recall an online comment from back at this time in 2004 saying this sketch felt like the type of corny humor that was rampant in the Dick Ebersol era of SNL. I agreed with that comment back then in ’04 when I was only vaguely familiar with the Ebersol era and somewhat associated it with hacky, annoying dreck like The Whiners, but after reviewing the entire Ebersol era in this SNL project of mine, I’ve gained a bigger appreciation for that era and find that it’s nowhere near as corny or hacky as I and others once deemed. I now find it hard to picture Ebersol ever letting a sketch like this on the air, but that still might be giving him a little too much credit.
— What is this, fucking amateur hour at SNL? You’d sure think so from watching Jimmy’s performance during his short appearance, combined with the corny writing of this sketch. Jimmy’s delivery in this sketch is extremely sloppy, he looks like he’s on the verge of busting out laughing the entire time, and he even flat out says “Oops!” after one of several line flubs he makes here. Jesus Christ. Once again tonight, I ask: this is an about-to-depart six-season SNL veteran I’m watching?!? Look, I like Jimmy, but man, this sketch REALLY accentuates the weaknesses he’s had as a performer over the years.
— Overall, this sketch didn’t produce a single laugh from me, nor did it produce a single moment that DIDN’T make me cringe. And I still want to know what the hell this kind of thing was doing on SNL.
STARS: *


ACCESS HOLLYWOOD
Olsen triplet (FRA) was edited out of New York Minute

— Blah, yet another display of bad “Pat O’Brien can’t breathe through his nose” jokes. I would say “At least this is the last time we’ll ever see it”, but I’m not 100% sure, as I think Jimmy later reprises his British Pat O’Brien in a Spy Glass sketch from the following season’s Cameron Diaz episode, which Jimmy cameos in.
— I remember finding Fred hilarious in this sketch when it originally aired, but in the years since then, I’ve gotten really burned out on men-in-drag humor on SNL, with a few exceptions. I don’t think this sketch is going to be one of those exceptions.
— I did get a laugh just now from the reveal of Fred’s Olsen Twin wearing granny panties under her skirt.
— Overall, some mild laughs, but I wasn’t a big fan of this sketch as a whole.
STARS: **½


ROLLER RINK
at a roller rink in 1979, Bloater brothers wilt when (hosts) get amorous

— Tonight’s Jimmy Fallon Farewell Tour continues.
— The Bloaters Brothers make their first appearance in quite a long while.
— The flashback premise is a bit of a change of pace for these Bloater Brothers sketches, but the humor here is kinda washing over me. I’m usually a defender of the Bloater Brothers, but I feel a bit lukewarm on their routine this time around.
— Hell yeah! A rare onscreen Don Pardo appearance! Great way to end this sketch.
STARS: **½


FAMILY BARBECUE
dad (CHP) uses camcorder to chronicle indoor Memorial Day family barbecue

— A laugh from the deviled eggs with M&Ms in them.
— Chris always plays such a good cheesy dad, and it’s good to see Chris starring in a sketch for once. Actually, I shouldn’t say “for once”, as this is actually the second consecutive sketch tonight starring or co-starring him, but it feels kinda rare to see him starring in an original one-off sketch.
— Interesting structure to this sketch, which you don’t see often in this era.
— Seth is fairly funny as the immature older brother.
— A cameo from Chris’ buttcrack.
STARS: ***


THE ADVENTURES OF HAROLD
by T. Sean Shannon- bald 12 year-old at school

 

— Hmm, well, THIS is certainly a huge change of pace for this era.
— The lack of any SNL performers, or anyone recognizable at all, gives this an even odder feel.
— I’m enjoying the aesthetic and acting in this, making this feel even more refreshingly out-of-the-ordinary for this SNL era.
— Good reveal at the end, though I’m surprised this film is ending already.
— Overall, not a bad film.
— This would end up being turned into a movie years later.
STARS: ***


SUMMERTIME
cast members’ summer medley culminates in Grease-inspired JIF & TIF duet

— The use of a locker room for the cast feels like a nice throwback to backstage sketches from the original SNL era. I know some of the SNL eras after the original one also occasionally used cast locker rooms in backstage sketches, but I can’t remember the last time we saw that.
— Oh, I absolutely love how meta this sketch is, with the cast lamenting this being the final sketch of the season while simultaneously anticipating their summer break. I believe this is the very first end-of-season goodbye sketch featuring every single member of the cast since “So Long Farewell” from exactly 10 years prior.
— So many endearing little details thrown in all throughout this. I even like the various odd ways the female cast members pronounce Horatio’s name, even though that seems to be a very inside joke.
— A great Travolta-esque entrance from Jimmy, appearing in his farewell sketch.
— A nice Grease turn in the music after Jimmy’s entrance.
— Lots of great random bits all throughout this sketch, such as Maya joining in Amy and Will’s “Summer Breeze” duet to do a vocalization of the guitar notes from that song, and Jimmy having to restrain Kenan when Kenan gets way too into his gesturing during the Grease song. But my absolute favorite random aspect of this sketch is definitely Darrell in the background, just leaning against the lockers for almost the entire sketch while looking down at his coffee cup in a very deadpan, emotionless manner, not participating at all in any of the various songs his castmates are doing. I’ve seen some SNL fans complain about that aspect of this sketch, as they assumed Darrell was genuinely being a sourpuss and went off-script by refusing to participate in any of the songs. Not only am I certain that Darrell’s lack of participation is a scripted part of this sketch, but that it’s also intended as a humorous meta commentary on 1) how detached Darrell is from the rest of this cast, and 2) how much Darrell’s somber, dry personality clashes against an upbeat musical piece like this. Darrell’s also unintentionally doing a spot-on impression of how I personally would typically act if I had to participate in any kind of musical number like this, so perhaps that’s why this aspect of this sketch resonates so much with me.
— I love the comically unnecessary use of a split-screen when Jimmy and Tina are singing right next to each other.
— Overall, I could not have loved this sketch any more. An extremely fun, epic, and amazing end-of-season goodbye sketch, and also a fitting and fun sendoff to Jimmy. I recall hearing that Amy and Fred both wrote this, and they didn’t even intend for it to be a farewell to Jimmy, as they weren’t 100% sure yet about his departure when they were writing this. They wrote this sketch as both a farewell to the season and as a “Thank you” to loyal SNL viewers. I guess it’s just a coincidence that it ended up working out as such a nice sendoff for Jimmy.
STARS: *****


GOODNIGHTS

IMMEDIATE POST-SHOW THOUGHTS
— Nothing special as a season finale, aside from the final sketch. The show hit a lull for a while after Update, but as a whole, this episode wasn’t too bad. However, given the upswing in quality this season has surprisingly experienced the last few episodes prior to this, I was hoping this season would end on a higher note than it did.


MY PERSONAL CHOICE OF “BEST OF” MOMENTS FOR THIS EPISODE, REPRESENTED WITH SCREENCAPS


HOW THIS EPISODE STACKS UP AGAINST THE PRECEDING ONE (Snoop Dogg)
a step down


MY PERSONAL CHOICE OF “BEST OF” MOMENTS FOR THIS ENTIRE SEASON, REPRESENTED WITH SCREENCAPS


HOW THIS OVERALL SEASON STACKS UP AGAINST THE PRECEDING SEASON (2002-03)
Kinda hard to say. Before the last few episodes of this season, I definitely would’ve said this season is a slight step down from the preceding one, but the aforementioned upswing this season’s quality took towards the end makes me have some second thoughts about where this season stands against the preceding one. I’ll have to just put an N/A for now, until I come to a decision.


My full set of screencaps for this episode is here


TOMORROW
Season 30 begins, with host Ben Affleck, one new addition to the cast, and a new co-anchor for Weekend Update

Posted on

May 8, 2004 – Snoop Dogg / Avril Lavigne (S29 E19)

Segments are rated on a scale of 1-5 stars

FRIENDS
George W. Bush (WLF) & Donald Rumsfeld (DAH) reunite a la Friends finale

— A great sudden turn with Maya’s Condoleezza Rice delivering an uncharacteristic Phoebe-from-Friends-esque “My taxi’s outside, I’ll drive you to the airport!”, which is followed by scene transition music from Friends, making you realize that this cold opening is turning into a parody of the big Friends series finale that had aired earlier that week.
— I love Will-as-Bush’s panicked, dramatic yell of “Let ‘im off the plane!” when listening to the answer machine message.
— This cold opening does the near-impossible and manages to make a man-on-man kiss from this SNL era actually come off damn funny. Part of what makes this particular man-on-man kiss work is the fact that it’s a Friends finale spoof, and another part of what makes it work is Will’s extreme commitment during the kiss, to the degree that he causes Darrell to eventually break.
— This is only Will’s third time playing Bush, and he continues to do a good job making the impression his own, and strong sketches like this help solidify to viewers that Will’s not going to be yet another another one-season-and-done Bush impersonator like Chris and Darrell before him.
— Will’s Bush plants another lustful kiss on Darrell-as-Donald-Rumsfeld’s cheek during Rumsfeld’s “Live from New York…”, which must be an ad-lib, as Darrell IMMEDIATELY loses it and breaks, as if he wasn’t expecting it. A great way to cap off this very strong and memorable cold opening.
STARS: ****½


MONOLOGUE
host cautions white America to cool it with the “izzle” talk

— Wow. Right out of the gate in this monologue, SNL breaks format by giving Snoop Dogg a very unconventional, outlandish entrance. Right as Don Pardo is about to announce Snoop, the theme music suddenly stops and is replaced with a musical tribal chant of “Snoop Doggy Dogg”, harem girls are seen dancing around the home base stage, child servants assist Snoop onstage after Pardo announces him, and Snoop is then joined by all of the female cast members. Oh, and everybody that I mentioned is all dressed in ancient native outfits. I love this whole monologue entrance gimmick. SNL rarely does anything out of the ordinary with their own format like this by this point of the show’s run.
— Some funny lines from Snoop addressing the annoying trend of white people speaking in “izzle” talk.
— Snoop’s line about how white people used to love pig-latin is very funny.
— An overall short and sweet monologue, and Snoop handled it really well.
STARS: ***½


MOM JEANS
A second rerun this season of a popular Mother’s Day commercial that originally aired the preceding season


¡SHOW BIZ GRANDE EXPLOSION!
Fericito doesn’t understand host’s humor

— Horatio’s character laughing in an insanely wild, hammy manner in response to a joke from Fericito actually cracked me up, even though I usually can’t stand that type of hamminess from Horatio by this point of his SNL tenure.
— (*sigh*) By this point of Fred’s SNL tenure, I’ve seen enough “Ay dios mio!”s from Fericito to last me a lifetime. That catchphrase and accompanying camera zoom-in has gotten to the official point where it’s slowly starting to get on my last nerve.
— A decent pre-taped “Fericito-Walking” segment with Fericito and SNL writer Emily Spivey. I don’t mind Fericito when he actually does something different for a change, such as this.
— Snoop’s “CDeez nuts” was a cheap joke, but his delivery of it had me freakin’ HOWLING.
— I love Horatio’s character’s amusement over Snoop’s crude jokes to Fericito.
— Snoop is a really fun guest in this sketch, and is giving this a boost.
STARS: ***


RAP BATTLE
wheelchair-bound (host) solicits sympathy to win rap-off competition

host performs “Nuthin’ But A ‘G’ Thang”

— Always a treat to see a J.B. Smoove sighting during these years, but it feels weird and kind of a waste seeing him play a silent, non-comedic role here, given how damn funny he usually is.
— A laugh from Snoop’s character unexpectedly entering in a wheelchair.
— Oh. My. God. Seth, of all people, entering the sketch as a “cool” rapper?!? Ha, this I gotta see. Why don’t I remember this portion of this sketch from my past viewings of it?
— Is Seth wearing the exact same outfit previously worn by “Ass Face” in the TRL sketch from season 27’s Jon Stewart episode? (side-by-side comparison below)

Seth must really like wearing that costume, as he’s later seen wearing it again during tonight’s goodnights.

— Snoop’s depressing raps about being in a wheelchair are freakin’ hilarious. I remember an online SNL fan back at this time in 2004 pointing out how this sketch had kind of a Michael O’Donoghue-esque dark feel, which made me love this sketch even more.
— Kenan’s extreme mugging and goofy grinning towards the audience during his appearance in this sketch reminds me of a HUGE gripe some online SNL fans had with Kenan during these early seasons of his. Those SNL fans complained to no end about Kenan’s penchant for hammy mugging and goofy big grins towards the audience in many sketches he appeared in. This is before the days when Kenan learned to tone down those aspects of himself as he grew as a performer.
— A big laugh from the great little part with Maya having to place a deaf Kenan’s hand onto the speaker so he can feel the beat.
— Hmm, a fourth wall break ending, with Snoop suddenly dropping character, getting out of the wheelchair, and breaking into a performance of his hit “Nuthin’ But a ‘G’ Thang”. Nice performance from Snoop, but ehh… I was really enjoying the hell out of where this sketch was going before this point, and this sudden turn is taking away from that. Not the way I personally would’ve ended this sketch.
STARS: ****


SCHEINWALD STUDIOS
Abe Scheinwald finds a kindred spirit in Booty Hotel pitcher (host)

— The name of Snoop’s character being MC Night Terrors is pretty funny.
— Rachel’s characterization of Abe Scheinwald is always worth some laughs.
— MC Night Terrors to Abe Scheinwald: “I like you, old dude. You like that old Muppet that be hangin’ up in the balcony criticizin’ folks.”
— During a humorously awkward pause that Rachel makes, Seth seems to try inducing a Debbie Downer-esque character break from Rachel by asking her an ad-libbed “You alright?” Rachel wisely seems to be fully aware of Seth’s attempt to get her to laugh, and she is having NONE of it, as she immediately snaps back to him, in character, “Yeah, I’m fine!”, and then goes on with the sketch. I’m glad Rachel understands how, as much of a blast as it was when she and her fellow performers had such a huge laughing meltdown during the preceding week’s Debbie Downer sketch, that type of huge laughing meltdown absolutely CANNOT become a regular thing on the show. A nice display of professionalism from Rachel here.
— This sketch is pretty much just treading the same territory of the preceding installment of this sketch, but it’s still working decently enough.
STARS: ***


ABC
ABC’s schedule is full of shows related to irresponsible plastic surgery

— Meh, the Angel Surgeons portion of this commercial fell completely flat. Where were the laughs there even supposed to be coming from?
— The Trading Noses portion of this commercial is hilarious.
— Snoop’s very menacing delivery into the camera of the line “I’m gonna cut you up, bitch!” during an extreme close-up of him holding up a knife made me laugh out loud, made even funnier by the fact that he’s dressed as a freakin’ ninja.
— Ha, funny how I mentioned earlier in this review how the clothes worn by “Ass Face” in the Jon Stewart episode was reused tonight by Seth, because in the “I Want A Butt For A Face” portion of this commercial, we get what appears to be a reuse of the Ass Face head prop. (side-by-side comparison below)

— Funny cutaway to a smiling, sleazy-looking Horatio being a fan of face-on-butt sex.
— This was kinda hit-and-miss overall, but there were definitely more hits than misses.
STARS: ***


FRIENDS
party atmosphere can’t overcome host’s despondence about end of Friends

— J.B. Smoove in a SECOND sketch tonight, and again, he’s just playing a silent, non-comedic role. I can’t stress enough what a waste this is of someone as naturally funny as him.
— Funny reveal of Snoop uncharacteristically being depressed over the fact that Friends has gone off the air.
— A very solid mock-dramatic performance from Snoop, and him emotionally going on and on about what a Friends fanatic he is is cracking me up. He is selling the hell out of this.
— When Finesse says his favorite so-called Friends moment was when “the blonde girl” got hit in the nose with a football, I love Snoop angrily responding “You damn fool! That was The Brady Bunch!”
— A hilarious photo of Snoop sporting “The Rachel” hairdo.
— A funny ending pre-taped sequence with Snoop, Kenan, and Finesse recreating the opening credits of Friends by dancing in a water fountain while the Friends theme song plays.
— At the very end of the water fountain scene, I love the ending close-up of Snoop just looking into the camera with a cool, kinda “deep” facial expression. (screencap below)

STARS: ****


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “Don’t Tell Me”


WEEKEND UPDATE
for Iraq prisoner abuse, Lynndie England (RAD) is the Dirtbag Of The Week

Bill Clinton (DAH) expects to be blamed for Iraq prisoner abuse scandal

clips show that JIF has done holiday-related song parodies for decades

— Yikes, Tina’s two opening jokes just made me groan. Lately, she seems to use her worst and most desperate joke(s) to start off each Update, a baffling decision.
— The “Dirtbag Of The Week” segment with Rachel as Lynndie England was kinda meh for me. I only liked it for Rachel’s performance.
— (*groan*) A THIRD Bill Clinton Update commentary in just the past three months of this season? I love Darrell’s Clinton impression, but they are REALLY over-relying on it lately, especially given how long after his presidency this season is.
— Ugh, why do these Clinton Update commentaries always have to begin by wasting so much time with him flirting with Tina and being all buddy-buddy with Jimmy? It’s not working for me anymore.
— Tonight’s overall Clinton commentary had a few mild laughs, but yeah, still not enough to justify bringing him back after such an insanely short amount of time since his last two Update commentaries. I never thought I’d see the day where I’d get burned out on Darrell’s popular Clinton impression, but here we are.
— We’re getting a deviation from Jimmy’s usual Update guitar song medleys.
— Oh, I absolutely LOVE this montage of Jimmy’s Update guitar song medleys from over the years, especially when it gets to the point where, the earlier and earlier they go in SNL’s timeline, the clips clearly start becoming fake. Such a great meta SNL piece. There are so many things about this montage that I love, including the detail of recreating the Update sets of the various Update eras we’re shown “clips” of (even if some of the set recreations aren’t accurate). I remember how Jimmy’s “Thanks, Charles Rocket” line in the 1980 Update “clip” was a big favorite among online SNL nerds like me when tonight’s episode originally aired.
— Speaking of online SNL fans when tonight’s episode originally aired, this montage of Jimmy’s Update guitar song medleys was taken as a big sign among online SNL fans that Jimmy may be leaving in the following week’s season finale. Also, tonight’s Update surprisingly ends up being Jimmy’s ONLY appearance all night, which, in a strange way, kinda feels significant for what ends up being his second-to-last episode. (And we’re going to be seeing A LOT of him in his final episode.) A huge rarity for him to make his only appearance on Update (all the while Tina made three appearances tonight, funnily enough; hell, FOUR, if you count the Mom Jeans rerun), but I guess you can say this extensive montage of his Update guitar song medleys is making up for his lack of airtime elsewhere in tonight’s episode.
— I love Jimmy’s parody of Usher’s “Yeah” performance from the preceding episode, right down to the detail of Jimmy even wearing the same outfit Usher wore during that performance. Some fun dancing from Tina here as well.
STARS: ***½


APPALACHIAN EMERGENCY ROOM
country folk exhibit more weird afflictions

— I continue to feel like I’m in the minority in liking these sketches.
— As always, Amy kills in these sketches.
— Funny visual of Kenan trapped inside that claw machine.
— Blah, they always stick Will with the least funniest parts of these Appalachian Emergency Room sketches.
— Snoop: “I don’t have no pool! Who do you think I am – Donald Trump?!?”
— Snoop ends his scene by telling Seth “By the way, I ain’t peein’ in no cup.” In the rerun version of this episode, Snoop’s scene (if not the entire sketch) would be replaced with the dress rehearsal version, which ends in a completely different manner, with Snoop’s character bringing a very long line of family members to accompany him to his assigned room. (A rerun of tonight’s episode was never aired on NBC, by the way, much like this season’s Colin Firth episode. I believe the reason for the lack of reruns for either episode is because over the summer of 2004, NBC aired quite a lot of new “Best Of” specials for cast members and hosts, which I guess didn’t leave any room for a rerun of tonight’s or the Firth episode. It’s similar to how the barrage of “Best Of”s aired during the summer of 1998 prevented a large number of season 23 episodes from ever getting an NBC rerun.)
STARS: ***


TV FUNHOUSE
“Pothead Theater” by RBS- stoner-requested cartoons turn tables on humans

— An unusual TV Funhouse, and also a rare case of TV Funhouse heavily featuring live-action scenes.
— Hmm. Not sure this is working for me so far.
— I did get a laugh just now from the animation of ketchup shaking people out of a bottle. However, do we need EVERY animation scene to be followed by a moronic laughing shot of the individual pothead who requested the respective animation scene? Those laughing shots are far more annoying than funny to me.
— Meh, after an upswing with the aforementioned ketchup scene, this TV Funhouse has gone back to not making me laugh.
— Okay, I absolutely loved the bit just now with an animation of a TV watching a person, which ends up looking no different from what an animation of a person watching a TV would look like. I also like the subsequent cutaway to the two potheads who requested that animation just staring into the camera in unamused, stone-faced (no pun intended) manner instead of laughing moronically like the other potheads in this TV Funhouse.
— Overall, this TV Funhouse was mostly a miss for me, but the great ending scene gave this a big boost.
STARS: **½


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “My Happy Ending”


DUSTER’S DIGEST
Duster’s Digest magazine has its focus on the lifestyle of PCP users

— Odd how this is the second consecutive comedy segment tonight that’s drug-related, though I guess its fitting, given tonight’s host.
— Very funny entrance from Amy.
— I love Will’s delivery during his testimony. Even just the way he says “Duster’s Digest” is strangely amusing.
— A good laugh from Seth cluelessly making his phone call onto a burning iron pressed against his face, and not even being fazed by it.
STARS: ***


MOTHER’S DAY MESSAGE FROM SNOOP DOGG
in his Mother’s Day Message, host thanks his mom for birthing him

— An interesting little change of pace for this SNL era. Almost has the feel of a typical Steve Martin piece from the late 80s SNL era (e.g. A Holiday Wish and To My Love), right down to the little detail of Snoop holding a rose the entire time.
— An overall simple but pretty good bit, and had some heart.
STARS: ***½


GOODNIGHTS

IMMEDIATE POST-SHOW THOUGHTS
— A consistently good episode, with nothing I disliked besides the TV Funhouse (and even THAT at least tried something new, plus it had a strong ending). This didn’t feel like a typical season 29 episode to me. (Then again, with this being the third consecutive good episode, I’m seriously wondering if this disappointing season has been experiencing a turnaround as the end of the season approaches.) Snoop Dogg was the fun, laid-back host you’d expect him to be, right from his unique monologue entrance, and I found that he worked particularly well in the odder bits that deviated from his image, like the wheelchair sketch and the Friends sketch.


MY PERSONAL CHOICE OF “BEST OF” MOMENTS FOR THIS EPISODE, REPRESENTED WITH SCREENCAPS


HOW THIS EPISODE STACKS UP AGAINST THE PRECEDING ONE (Lindsay Lohan)
about the same


My full set of screencaps for this episode is here


TOMORROW
Season 29 comes to an end, with hosts Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen, the second about-to-turn-18-years-old hosts in just the last three episodes, and also the very first set of twins to ever co-host SNL. It’s also the farewell of Jimmy Fallon.

Posted on

May 1, 2004 – Lindsay Lohan / Usher (S29 E18)

Segments are rated on a scale of 1-5 stars

PREPARATION
Dick Cheney (DAH) coaches George W. Bush (WLF) before 9/11 testimony

— It’s both odd and kinda redundant how this is the second consecutive cold opening with Darrell’s Dick Cheney preparing someone for their 9/11 testimony (Condoleezza Rice last time, President Bush this time).
— Will makes his first appearance as present-day Bush, after previously playing young Bush in a 1960s sketch.
— President Bush: “I’m George W. Bush, and I approve this muffin.”
— Dick Cheney to President Bush, regarding the public’s perception of him: “They think you’re like Rain Man… without the math skills.”
— Bush reading his answers off of his leg is really funny.
— Is it just me, or does Darrell’s Cheney voice sound kinda hoarse in this cold opening? Is Darrell under the weather this week?
— Some pretty good laughs from Bush’s various examples of body language.
— Will’s Bush impression continues to be a lot of fun and a big step up from both Chris and Darrell’s takes on Bush. It also helps that Will has been given better writing here than Chris and Darrell typically got in their respective Bush sketches.
STARS: ***½


MONOLOGUE
host, Hilary Duff (RAD), Avril Lavigne (AMP) end their respective feuds

— Seeing a young, baby-faced, loaded-with-potential Lindsay Lohan makes 2004 feel so long ago.
— Oh, the innocent days where the worst thing that could be seen about Lindsay Lohan in a tabloid is her little “teen queen” feud with Hilary Duff.
— The return of Amy’s Avril Lavigne, which never fails to amuse me. What makes it even more amusing this time around is the fact that Avril Lavigne is actually the musical guest in the very next episode.
— Chris: “When do you turn 18?” Hilary Duff: “(in a gleeful manner) Never!”
STARS: ***


TURLINGTON’S LOWER BACK TATTOO REMOVER
Turlington’s (CHP) Lower Back Tattoo Remover erases age-discrepant art

— A huge laugh from the time-lapsed sequence of a “Pretty Lady” tattoo on a thin woman’s back turning into the words “Pretty Sad” when her body has grown much older and saggier. I remember when this originally aired back in 2004, I didn’t even notice that the sagging tattoo read “Pretty Sad”, and thus, I didn’t understand why Chris subsequently said the line “Pretty sad indeed.”
— Great bit with Amy exclaiming “Mother(*bleep*)!” in response to the tattoo remover burning her skin.
— As usual, Chris is fantastic as the spokesperson.
— Very funny ending bit about Amy having a child from a crazy weekend in Jamaica.
STARS: ****


JARRET’S ROOM
stoner (host) moves in & meets a weed-smoking robot

— This ends up being the final Jarret’s Room sketch.
— I remember when tonight’s episode originally aired, I and some other online SNL fans were surprised that SNL didn’t save Jarret’s Room for the following week’s episode, given a certain weed-lover who’s hosting that night (you’ll see who it is at the every end of this review) and who seemed like he would fit perfectly into the weed-centric Jarret’s Room.
— Wow, DJ Jonathan Feinstein’s Britney Spears/Toxic bit got cut off surprisingly fast by Jarret. Was SNL afraid of giving some viewers certain “feelings” over seeing Seth in that bodysuit?
— For once, Gobi makes a straightforward entrance instead of one of his trademark weed-centric gimmicky entrances.
— Jarret mentions that he and Gobi are finally moving off campus after tonight’s episode. I recall how, when this originally aired, many online SNL fans took this as a sign that Jimmy’s leaving SNL at the end of this season. IIRC, Jimmy’s departure wouldn’t be publicly confirmed until earlier in the same day of his final episode.
— A funny asinine flashback sequence of something that we saw happen literally just a few seconds ago.
— The Will Forte-voiced weed-smoking robot is absolutely stealing this sketch and is making this easily one of the better Jarret’s Room installments. A good way for this recurring sketch to go out.
STARS: ***½


HOGWARTS ACADEMY
Hermione’s (host) newfound cleavage bewitches Harry Potter (RAD)

— Hoo, boy. Here comes a sketch that…uh, will certainly be…uh, interesting to discuss by today’s standards.
— And there famously walks in Lindsay as a cleavage-sporting Hermoine.
— As just a 19-year-old when this sketch originally aired during the less-self-aware year of 2004, I had no issue with SNL doing a sketch inappropriately centering around a 17-year-old’s cleavage. 19-year-old me even partook in this sketch’s male characters’ ogling of said cleavage, as much as I don’t want to admit that anymore. Now that I’m in my mid-30s and times have certainly changed, I’m able to recognize how troublesome this sketch is. It’s a shame that this sketch doesn’t hold up too well anymore, because I recall liking this sketch a lot back when it originally aired… and, no, not just because of Lindsay’s cleavage. 19-year-old me got a lot of laughs from the sketch’s humor, performances, and plenty of what I deemed to be quote-worthy lines. (Unfortunately, my old review for this episode that I did back in 2004 when this episode originally aired is lost, unlike most of the other season 29 reviews that I originally did back then.) The fact that Harry Potter was something I was never into, and yet this sketch could still get a lot out laughs out of 19-year-old me says a lot about this sketch.
— An amusing visual of Horatio entering in that wig and beard.
— Ugh, right after I give Horatio a compliment, he has to piss all over it by cracking up at himself as usual.
STARS: **½


RIDING WITH BILLY JOEL
erratic chauffeur Billy Joel (HOS) sings while driving recklessly

— A funny spoof of Billy Joel’s drunk-driving woes from around this time, even if it feels kinda wrong for SNL to spoof such a thing. (Then again, the Harry Potter sketch that I had just watched prior to this sketch has kinda numbed me to other cases of “wrong” humor on SNL).
— I’ve been one of Horatio’s harshest critics this season, and even *I* can admit that he’s doing a killer job in his portrayal of a drunken Billy Joel.
— A memorable blooper in which a mailbox that gets thrown onto the car from off-camera gets stuck on the windshield accidentally, which completely blocks the performers from the camera, leaving the female performers in genuine hysterics. Horatio solves this predicament with an ad-lib in which he leans out of the car window to his side and uses his beer bottle to shove the mailbox off of the windshield. Excellent save from Horatio.
— Speaking of the mailbox, I wonder if that’s the same mailbox that was used in a similar manner then-recently in the Donnie G. And Sidecar sketch from the Ben Affleck episode.
— Wow, a particularly over-the-top shriek of “YOU NEED HELP, BUSTER!!!” from Maya to Horatio’s Billy Joel.
STARS: ****


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest & Ludacris [real] perform “Yeah!”


WEEKEND UPDATE
list-loving Jorge Rodriguez (HOS) failed the GED test many times

— A very odd and unprecedented moment in SNL history occurs right now, in which, right as Jimmy’s about to deliver a joke (a Donald Trump joke, no less), a voice from a real audience member actually interrupts the show by audibly calling out “Hey, Jimmy?”, and Jimmy immediately turns towards the voice in the audience and responds “Yeah?” (which says something about Jimmy, as I feel most Weekend Update anchors would’ve just ignored an audience member calling out their name). The audience member then says what sounds like “Yeah, up here” (it’s hard to tell exactly what he said, as he’s speaking from quite a distance and obviously isn’t mic’ed), and Jimmy just goes “I’ll talk to you later on, my brother” and then ad-libs towards the camera “I hate when my father gets drunk” (which I swear is an ad-lib Jimmy also used in a previous Update, but I’m not 100% sure). There’s actually a backstory to this whole incident. According to an online comment in 2004 from an SNL fan who stood on the standby line to get tickets for this episode, there was a guy on the line who kept obnoxiously bragging to everybody that if he gets a ticket to the show, he’s going to make SNL history by interrupting the show from the audience and asking Jimmy Fallon a question during Weekend Update. Most of the people on the standby line probably assumed the guy was just bluffing, but as they later saw, he ended up following through on his word.
— The Bill Clinton book cover that SNL made up (first screencap below) reminds me a lot of a made-up book cover that SNL used in a presidential address cold opening that Darrell’s Clinton did in the Julianne Moore episode from season 23 (second screencap below).

— Meh, another Horatio Update commentary with him interacting with Jimmy, which almost always spells doom.
— Horatio’s at least not going off the rails with typical unfunny ad-libs and laughing-at-himself antics that his Update commentaries often feature, but ugh, this commentary with his character listing off a whole bunch of things is comedy death to me.
— When Horatio’s character asks if anyone’s seen his friend Pepe, Jimmy ad-libs “I think he was just up there”, pointing towards the portion of the audience that the aforementioned audience member who interrupted Jimmy earlier in tonight’s Update was seated. When the audience is laughing and applauding this ad-lib of Jimmy’s, Jimmy can be heard saying “He got removed”, acknowledging that the audience member got kicked out for his interruption.
— Tonight’s Update is doing quite a number of callbacks to bits Jimmy and Tina did earlier this season, such as Jimmy and Tina’s conversation about dirty Dutch terms, and the punchline of an STD joke being Jimmy turning to a side camera and saying “You’re welcome”.
STARS: **½


DEBBIE DOWNER
at Disney World, gloomy Debbie Downer (RAD) dispirits a family reunion

— Oh, here’s a VERY famous SNL sketch.
— My first laugh in this sketch comes from Kenan’s name being Billiam. Even just his delivery of that name is inherently funny.
— I like how the opening title sequence and theme music feel kinda like a throwback to SNL’s late 80s/early 90s era, which had tons of characters with their own opening title sequence and theme song. I recall this Debbie Downer sketch being the beginning of somewhat of a revival of title sequences and theme songs for recurring characters, as we’ll be seeing quite a number of them the following two seasons.
— Naturally, Jimmy and Horatio are the very first performers to break in this sketch (the fifth above screencap for this sketch), while the other performers initially remain unfazed.
— And there we go. Rachel’s line flub, “The media’s so sensitive there… so secretive…”, as well as Jimmy’s laughter at said line flub, is what officially causes Rachel to start losing it, setting off a chain reaction around the table. The famous widespread meltdown has officially begun.
— Wow. Just wow. It is truly something to see this sketch gradually meltdown so badly. Very unprecedented in SNL history up to this point. (Seems to be quite a number of unprecedented moments happening tonight). I’m usually against how unprofessional this particular SNL cast has slowly been becoming around this season, and of course, I’ve been very vocal of my dislike of the undeserved free rein Jimmy and Horatio are often given to carelessly derail sketches with their laughing and other unprofessional antics, but goddammit, everybody’s breaking is a fucking RIOT in this sketch, and their simultaneous laughter combined with the audience’s uproarious reactions is very infectious.
— What makes Rachel’s breaking here even funnier is the fact that, as part of the sketch, the camera has to frequently do “Wah-wahhhhh” zoom-ins on Debbie Downer’s face, and thus, we get lots of zoom-ins of Rachel fighting unsuccessfully to keep a straight face so she can do her character’s trademark deadpan looks into the zoomed-in camera.
— Now here comes one PARTICULARLY epic part, and the moment that, in my opinion, officially propels this sketch into legendary status: Rachel literally crying with laughter when struggling to deliver the big line “By the way, it’s official: I can’t have children.” A freakin’ classic moment.
— Another truly classic moment right now, with Horatio being seen using a fucking MICKEY MOUSE WAFFLE to wipe off his tears from laughter.
— Fred is the ONLY performer keeping a straight face (aside from what appeared to be genuine giggling from him after he and the others posed together for a photo). According to an SNL fan who went to this episode and was also among a crowd of people outside 30 Rock getting autographs from cast members after the show, Fred, while giving autographs, was asked why he didn’t join in on his fellow performers’ laughing in the Debbie Downer sketch. Fred explained that he had no clue why they were laughing and he didn’t feel that he should laugh just because THEY were laughing. A very admirable display of professionalism from Fred. Too bad it wouldn’t last, though, as his later seasons on the show are quite fraught with breaking from him, especially whenever he teams up with Bill Hader.
— Overall, a historic, legendary, and hilarious meltdown among the performers, with a few very memorable and great little ad-libs, making this sketch an all-timer. I can definitely see some people finding this sketch overrated, but for me, this sketch deserves the hype.
— It’s really too bad that the importance and novelty of this sketch is slightly diminished by the fact that SNL would turn this into a recurring sketch later on – a bad decision. It should’ve been obvious to SNL that the only reason this first Debbie Downer sketch was such an instant hit is because of the huge extent that the performers broke during it. The written material itself was only mildly funny at best. And the very tepid, blooper-less second installment of this sketch, in the following season’s Ben Affleck-hosted season premiere, pretty much bombs with the audience and further proves how not-so-great the written material behind Debbie Downer always was, and how wrong it was for SNL to assume people wanted to see more of these sketches without the performers breaking.
STARS: *****


CLUB TRAXX
hook of young pop duo D.A.D.I. (RAD) & (host) is lesbianism

— Ugh, this sketch once again. This thankfully ends up being the final installment.
— The clip of Amy performing dance music onstage (the second above screencap for this sketch) truly looks like something straight out of Deep House Dish, a recurring sketch that SNL would debut a few seasons later (and would draw my ire, as I I recall absolutely despising those sketches with a fiery passion back when they originally aired). It even looks like Amy’s performance in this Club Traxx sketch is using the exact same Deep House Dish performance stage and exact same Deep House Dish onscreen graphic of the  singer’s name and title of the song they’re performing, though I’m only going by my memory of what Deep House Dish typically looked like (I haven’t watched an installment of that sketch in ages).
— I’m getting a pretty good laugh from Will’s open-shirt performance.
— The D.A.D.I. stuff with Rachel and Lindsay is doing nothing for me.
— Nothing else to say so far. I’ve complained enough about this recurring sketch in past installments, and am ready to happily see this sketch enter retirement.
STARS: *½


SLEEPOVER
hyper preteen Kaitlin (AMP) welcomes sleepover veteran (host) to her home

— The debut of another recurring sketch that I recall despising with a fiery passion back when it originally aired. I’ll try to go into this debut with an open mind tonight, as I’ve seen some people make a good case when defending this recurring sketch.
— This recurring sketch debut was cut from the preceding episode, where I assume host Janet Jackson played the same role Lindsay is playing here.
— I’m actually finding a slice-of-life-ish charm to this sketch, just like defenders of this recurring sketch always claim it has. I especially like the charm of Amy-as-Kaitlin’s interactions with Horatio’s Rick, particularly when he helps get her out of a lie she told Lindsay regarding having a pool. Also, as people always point out about these sketches, it’s astounding how the usually breakable Horatio is consistently able to keep a straight face at Amy screaming in his face.
STARS: ***


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “Burn”


17TH ANNUAL ADULT MOVIE AWARDS
fear of FCC produces truncated broadcast

— Some pretty good cheap laughs from the endless barrage of fictional porn star names.
— I like the little joke of some non-porn-star celebrity names being thrown into the mix, such as Jimmy Kimmel and SNL’s own Darrell Hammond.
STARS: ***


GOODNIGHTS

IMMEDIATE POST-SHOW THOUGHTS
— A fun episode; in fact, it’s easily one of the more upbeat episodes of this season. This episode wasn’t perfect, but, unlike a lot of this season’s episodes, it had a consistently entertaining and fun vibe that made even some of the misfires more forgivable. There were even some all-time memorable and funny bloopers, such as the Billy Joel mailbox-on-the-windshield incident and the entire Debbie Downer sketch.


MY PERSONAL CHOICE OF “BEST OF” MOMENTS FOR THIS EPISODE, REPRESENTED WITH SCREENCAPS


HOW THIS EPISODE STACKS UP AGAINST THE PRECEDING ONE (Janet Jackson)
a mild step up


My full set of screencaps for this episode is here


TOMORROW
Snoop Dogg

Posted on

April 10, 2004 – Janet Jackson (S29 E17)

Segments are rated on a scale of 1-5 stars

PREPARATION
Dick Cheney (DAH) coaches Condoleezza Rice (host) to flash a boob

— Darrell-as-Cheney’s extended phone conversation with an unseen President Bush has some laughs, but makes it painfully obvious that SNL doesn’t seem to have an official Bush impersonator by this point. I guess even after that 1960s sketch from this season’s Drew Barrymore episode where Will Forte played a young Bush, SNL is still iffy on the idea of Will OFFICIALLY taking over the Bush impression by playing present-day Bush. That would change in the very next episode.
— Interesting decision to have Condoleezza Rice being played by tonight’s host, Janet Jackson, instead of Maya once again.
— Darrell’s Cheney has some funny lines to Janet’s Rice.
— A good laugh from Darrell’s Cheney suddenly suggesting that Rice flash a boob during her 9/11 testimony, referencing a certain then-recent infamous incident from tonight’s host.
— Janet-as-Rice’s toothy smiling during her 9/11 testimony is funny.
— SNL was too early on their cue to blur out Janet-as-Rice’s boob flash, plus you can clearly see that Janet’s wearing a bra, but the gag is still working enough for me.
STARS: ***


MONOLOGUE
host’s home movies unconvincingly show she’s from a normal family

— Pretty funny bit about three siblings that Janet forgot about.
— Another obligatory “wardrobe malfunction” reference. This one didn’t work for me as much as the one in the cold opening.
— An overall pretty short monologue, but maybe that’s for the best.
STARS: **½


BRIAN FELLOW’S SAFARI PLANET
(host) & flying squirrel are a distraction

— Ooooooookay. So I take it from this Brian Fellow’s Safari Planet opening title sequence on my screen right now that Tracy Morgan is cameoing AGAIN this season?
— Yep, there he is. I love Tracy, but it’s a little sad seeing him hanging onto SNL so hard this first season after his departure from the cast, especially considering how tonight’s episode is around the time when a cancellation of Tracy’s unsuccessful NBC sitcom was all but confirmed by this point. As we know now, though, his post-SNL career would later take off.
— The whole conversation between Brian Fellow and Janet regarding if her flying squirrel is aware of 9/11 is hilarious.
— I love’s Will’s deadpan “I really don’t know how to respond to that” line about a particularly asinine thing Fellow asks regarding Will’s French poodle hating America.
— Fellow falling in love with Janet’s character dispels any assumptions that I (and I’m sure a lot of people) previously had about Fellow’s sexual orientation.
STARS: ***½


TICKET LINE
Starkisha balks at paying $250 for a ticket to a Janet Jackson concert

— Oh, god. Fucking Starkisha.
— Finesse In A Dress alert.
— Some self-deprecating humor with Janet playing a character complaining about Janet Jackson’s ticket prices and spreading unflattering rumors about Janet.
— Amy’s very whitebred, nosy character is cracking me up.
— Kenan telling Chris, in regards to Starkisha and her friends, “I’m just as afraid of people like that as you are” made me laugh, but felt like an inferior variation of his great line to Chris in the first Starkisha sketch (“Why they gotta be my friends? Hey, man, I came with YOU.”).
— Overall, while this sketch was still certainly bad, it didn’t come off quite as cringeworthy as the first Starkisha sketch and this had a few more saving graces.
STARS: **½


AN EASTER TREAT FROM SNL
HOS, CHK, TRM, JIF, Simon Cowell [real] perform a happy Christmas ditty

— Oh, hell yeah, the return of the “I Wish It Was Christmas Today” routine, always a favorite of mine.
— I gotta say, though – Chris Kattan cameoing for the THIRD episode this first season after his departure from the cast?!? And I thought it was sad that Tracy’s been hanging onto SNL so hard after leaving. With Kattan on his third cameo of the season and Tracy on his second, I’m starting to ask myself if either of them even truly left the cast?
— Interesting twist with this turning out to be an audition for Simon Cowell, who’s in the audience.
— Funny bit with Simon questioning what Kattan does in the band.
— I like Tracy’s “Imma kick this dude’s ass!” after an insult Simon directs at the band.
— Pretty fun turn with Simon joining in on the musical number while the audience musically claps along to the beat.
STARS: ****


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
host performs “All Nite (Don’t Stop)”


WEEKEND UPDATE
off the record, Condoleezza Rice (MAR) outs co-workers’ lack of diligence

maudlin Kevin Eubanks (FIM) laughs at TIF’s lame joke

JIF sings the theme from nonexistent James Bond film “Jewel Eye”

— Looks like we get Maya as Condoleezza Rice tonight after all. What’s the point of having her play Rice the same night Janet did? Kinda reminds me of Martin Short and Rich Hall both playing Doug Henning at separate points in a single season 10 episode, but at least SNL lampshaded that by having Rich Hall’s Doug Henning say a tongue-in-cheek line about SNL having two Doug Hennings and how it’s an optical illusion. We get no lampshading of the sort with SNL’s two Condoleezza Rices tonight.
— Some laughs from Maya’s Rice gossiping in an off-the-record voice, making decent use of Maya’s knack for doing lots of “white” voices that Janet may not have been able to pull off had she done this same commentary.
— WTF? Finesse suddenly appearing out of nowhere as Kevin Eubanks from The Tonight Show?
— Again, I ask, WTF? What in the world was the point of the extremely brief Kevin Eubanks “commentary”?
— Tina’s mean-spirited joke about Jewel’s teeth rubbed me the wrong way. I don’t know why I found it so off-putting, given the fact that Update anchors over the years have certainly done lots of harsh jokes about celebrities.
— I think I used up all of my “WTF”s too early, because now we get this incredibly dumb and unfunny bit with Jimmy singing a James Bond-esque “Jewel Eye” song, which isn’t working for me at all. And unfortunately, THAT’S what they’re ending this Update on.
STARS: **½


PRINCE SHOW
Paula Abdul (host) & Steve Harvey (KET) visit

— A laugh from the camera panning over to Prince’s “scared” face (the third above screencap for this sketch).
— Kenan’s Steve Harvey impression makes its debut, and, wow, it’s COMPLETELY different from the Steve Harvey impression that we’re used to seeing Kenan do nowadays. Also weird in retrospect to see him playing Harvey with actual hair.
— Prince’s cry-singing while crawling on the floor is really funny. Even Janet seems to be cracking up at it.
— Overall, a decent Prince Show installment, but you can sense that the novelty of these sketches is slowly starting to wear off.
STARS: ***


CORKSOAKERS
(HOS) & (JIF) educate winery tourists on the art of soaking corks

— Another in the series of this era’s dirty wordplay sketches.
— This looks like the same set from another Italian winery sketch this season, where Jack Black played a wine taster doing an endless amount of spit-takes.
— An okay double entendre concept, but I’m not exactly bowled over with hysterical laughter.
— I love Rachel as a toothless grandma who still “soaks cork” at her old age.
— One of the more remembered aspects of this sketch is an unscripted one, with Janet always having trouble saying “soaking cork” instead of the actual term it’s a play on.
— After how bad of a laughing meltdown they had in the preceding episode, I’m glad Jimmy and Horatio are keeping their shit together in this sketch.
— When the winery guys are hornily rushing towards Janet and have to be held back, there’s a funny little detail that’s easy to miss, in which Jimmy grooms himself by combing his hair AND his thick fake mustache (screencap below).

— Overall, a very polarizing sketch among SNL fans (as is any dirty wordplay sketch that’s not Schwetty Balls), as it seems people either love or hate this sketch. I’m somewhere straight in the middle. I found this sketch amusing enough and it had a fun vibe, but to me, the sketch as a whole was just average and I didn’t find the puns to be nearly as well-written or funny as the ones in the preceding season’s Colonel Angus sketch.
STARS: ***


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
host performs “Strawberry Bounce”


GOOD TIMES
Florida Evans (KET) & kin persevere amidst urban tragedies

— Hell yeah, a Good Times sketch! I became an instant huge fan of this show when I discovered it in reruns during my childhood in the 90s.
— SNL writer J.B. Smoove finds himself in another noteworthy onscreen role. The casting of him as J.J. in this particular sketch shows that this season only has a small amount of black cast members.
— The fake laugh track is a very accurate spoof of the boisterous Good Times audience.
— Kenan In A Dress alert. But, by god, he sounds absolutely uncanny in his vocal impression of Florida.
— Maya’s doing a spot-on impression of how over-dramatic Thelma tends to act.
— An unintentional laugh from the Black Jesus painting falling off the wall after Kenan’s Florida lightly touches it, a blooper that Kenan handles in a very funny and expert way.
— Another sign that this season only has a small amount of black cast members, as Maya has to play both Thelma AND Willona through the magic of a fast off-camera costume change. She’s at least doing an accurate impression of both characters.
— This sketch is perfectly and humorously hitting so many of the dramatic beats and hardships that the Evans family typically faces on Good Times.
— I got a good laugh from Chris’ white guy character incorrectly thinking the name Malcolm X is pronounced “Malcolm 10”.
— I absolutely love the ending line from J.B. Smoove’s J.J.: “Would this be a bad time to tell ya’ll I got Sickle Cell?”
— Overall, such a fantastic parody of a childhood favorite show of mine.
STARS: ****½


BOOM BOOMER
in the 1970s, cocaine sparks (CHP)’s interest in party game Boom Boomer

— Weird how this is the second consecutive sketch tonight set in the 70s, but I kinda like that, in a weird way.
— Speaking of the 70s, the 70s aesthetic of this sketch, the party setting, the look of the characters, and the fact that Seth and Amy are playing the hosts of this party all kinda feel like a precursor to the famous Key Party sketch from the following season.
— After Chris’ character gets coked up, it’s great to see Chris get a chance to go extremely over-the-top, because 1) he does that so rarely on SNL, 2) he does it so well, and 3) he’s been badly underused lately. However, this feels like a weak and abrupt way to end this sketch. If that “ending” was supposed to be a punchline, I don’t get it.
STARS: **


GOODNIGHTS

IMMEDIATE POST-SHOW THOUGHTS
— A decent episode, especially compared to both this season and the debacle of an episode that preceded this. Lots of okay material and one or two standout things.


MY PERSONAL CHOICE OF “BEST OF” MOMENTS FOR THIS EPISODE, REPRESENTED WITH SCREENCAPS


HOW THIS EPISODE STACKS UP AGAINST THE PRECEDING ONE (Donald Trump)
a big step up


My full set of screencaps for this episode is here


TOMORROW
Lindsay Lohan makes her hosting debut

Posted on

April 3, 2004 – Donald Trump / Toots and the Maytals (S29 E16)

Segments are rated on a scale of 1-5 stars

THE APPRENTICE
host fires JIF a la The Apprentice; George Ross & Carolyn Kepcher cameos

— Geez, we get Trump appearing right out of the gate tonight, without me even getting to enjoy the first few minutes before he inevitably takes over the show. Boy, this is going to be a LOOOOOOONNNNNG episode, isn’t it?
— I will say that Trump looks “normal” here compared to how he looks today.
— I got a good laugh from George (Trump’s male assistant/board member/whatever) responding “I thought it sucked!” when asked how he felt about dress rehearsal.
— I did get one laugh from Trump just now (I’ll keep count of how many laughs I’ll get from him tonight, which I highly doubt will come anywhere close to approaching the double digits) when he points to Jimmy and says, in regards to Jimmy’s performance at dress rehearsal, “This idiot was laughing the whole time”, which is made even funnier by the camera then cutting to a close-up of Jimmy stifling his laughter as usual.
— Finesse: “First of all, nobody’s firing me, because there’s only four black people on NBC: me, Kenan, Kwame, and Whoopi.” Funny line, but I doubt a lot of people watching this cold opening years later have any idea who Kwame is (a then-current contestant on The Apprentice) nor are aware that Whoopi Goldberg had a short-lived NBC sitcom at the time. Wasn’t Tracy Morgan’s short-lived NBC sitcom still on its last legs around this point? Finesse should’ve included him as a fifth black person on NBC.
— A very funny Frasier promo shown during a mid-sketch fake commercial break. Reminds me of that brilliant “Last Chance Tuesdays” promo that SNL did in the middle of a Bachelor sketch from the preceding season’s Eric McCormack episode. I wonder if both mid-sketch promos were written by the same person.
— Good walk-on from Lorne.
— Lorne, while on a firing spree: “Finesse, go get Parnell.” Ooh, I do NOT like that implication that Lorne’s about to fire Parnell. Sure, it’s only a comedic line in this sketch, but come on, SNL. You already fired the man once before (very undeservedly so), and making a “humorous” passing mention in a sketch of firing him again just feels cruel.
— I like how this Apprentice parody is even going to the extent of showing Jimmy’s “exit interview” in the back of a taxi after SNL fires him.
— A few awkward pauses from Trump here and there throughout this cold opening.
STARS: ***


OPENING MONTAGE
— A Cartoon By Robert Smigel is credited in this montage, but no cartoon ends up airing tonight, as the show presumably runs long. The cartoon was going to be about tonight’s host, Donald Trump.


MONOLOGUE
host’s stand-in DAH practices “You’re Fired”; Jeff Zucker (JIF) pitches

— Oh, god. Cue the shameless Trump bragfest about how “great” he is and how The Apprentice is currently the #1 show on TV. This smug bragfest is fucking TORTURE to sit through.
— Darrell appearing as a Trump stand-in alongside the real Trump isn’t saving this monologue like I want it to, though it’s a gag that SNL would later repeat in Trump’s season 41 monologue, only with Taran Killam added in as a third Trump.
— Blah, the fake NBC shows Jimmy’s Jeff Zucker is plugging are all over-relying on hacky gay jokes, which is sadly typical for this SNL era.
— Overall, not a single laugh from me during this entire monologue.
STARS: *


FEAR FACTOR JUNIOR
Joe Rogan (FRA) traumatizes youngsters on reality TV

— Very funny concept of little kids cruelly being made to perform the type of stunts adults typically perform on Fear Factor.
— Fred is great as Joe Rogan.
— In a scene where one kid is told his parents will get a divorce if he doesn’t complete his challenge, one of his parents is played by future cast member Rob Riggle (screencap below).

STARS: ****


LIVE WITH REGIS & KELLY
host unabashedly promotes himself

— Solid bit with Amy’s Kelly Ripa currently taping various shows on different cameras.
— WTF? Gelman played by Dratch??? While I’m happy not to have to see YET ANOTHER Chris Kattan cameo this season (then again, just wait until the following episode…), having Rachel take over the Gelman impression is just… odd. And not funny. SNL needs to just drop the Gelman parts of these sketches. They’ve never been anything but a whole bunch of hacky, lazy-ass gay jokes that, as I said earlier, are way too overused in this SNL era.
— The usual fun chemistry from Darrell and Amy, including a big character break from Darrell when Amy keeps grabbing onto him at one point.
— Ugh, cue YET ANOTHER shameless Trump bragfest tonight, with the added “bonus” of Darrell’s Regis kissing his ass over how amazing he is. Fucking kill me.
— Double ugh at Trump’s sleazy-ass comments about Amy-as-Kelly-Ripa’s body.
— Overall, despite the usual fun from Darrell and Amy in these Regis & Kelly sketches, all the awful Trump stuff killed this sketch dead. The Gelman crap with Rachel only helped to make things even worse.
STARS: *½


VIP SEATS
Star Jones (KET) corrals host & claims to know who will be The Apprentice

— Kenan In A Dress alert.
— Between Kenan in yet another drag role, Trump being Trump, and lots of hacky and lazy-ass fat jokes about Star Jones, there is NOTHING to like here so far.
— Okay, Kenan got a great laugh from me at the very end of this sketch, with him suddenly grabbing an NBC page by the arm and telling her, in a deep, loud, intimidating voice, “GIMME A PELLEGRINO!” That was reminiscent of a very famous SNL moment with Chris Farley in a Gap Girls sketch (“LAY OFF ME, I’M STARVING!”).
STARS: *½


DONALD TRUMP’S HOUSE OF WINGS
David Crosby (HOS) endorses host’s chicken eatery

— Another in the series of “non-actor host does a commercial promoting their fictional restaurant” sketches.
— I remember when I watched this episode back when it originally aired in 2004, I disliked the musical numbers of this sketch (I couldn’t stand these “non-actor host does a commercial promoting their fictional restaurant” sketches back then) while loving Trump’s goofy dancing and facial expressions during said musical numbers. Cut to 16 years later, I now feel the exact opposite about this sketch, where I like the musical numbers but can’t even muster up so much as a chuckle at Trump’s goofy dancing and facial expressions during the musical numbers.
— Why the hell does Trump sound like he’s yelling all of his lines, as if he thinks he’s not mic’ed?
— An actual funny walk-on from Horatio as David Crosby.
— At the end of this sketch, they actually reference the previous two “non-actor host does a commercial promoting their fictional restaurant” sketches in a map at the end (screencap below), which was a nice touch.

STARS: **½


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest, Ben Harper & Jack Johnson [real] perform “Pressure Drop”


WEEKEND TRUMP DATE
newscast’s garishness makes TIF uncomfortable

— Hmm, interesting deviation from the usual Weekend Update.
— Jimmy and Tina end up immediately giving up on this idea, and decide to go back to the regular Weekend Update. Ehh, probably for the best, as this revamped Update was starting to come off too Trump-centric for my likes. Still, this was an interesting brief bit, as I’m always a sucker for when SNL breaks format.
STARS: N/A (not a rateable segment, but then again, I’m stretching things by counting this as a separate segment from the regular Weekend Update)


WEEKEND UPDATE
many objects hit indignant Omarosa Manigault-Stallworth (MAR) on the head

— Feels kinda fitting seeing an Update joke about Jason Patric during an SNL episode with a difficult, notorious host, considering the infamy Patric has as an SNL host himself (though as far as I know, Patric wasn’t difficult behind the scenes at the show).
— Jimmy is far more amused at this a-whole-bunch-of-things-falling-on-Omarosa’s-head bit than either I or the audience are (though the audience is fairly amused). This bit is just plain stupid and annoying to me. I’m aware of the Apprentice incident it’s spoofing and I remember a lot of online SNL fans in 2004 loving this spoof, but the spoof is unfunny to me, is going on WAAAAYYYY too long, and is encouraging lots of bad mugging from Maya.
STARS: **½


THE PRINCE AND THE PAUPER
update of The Prince & The Pauper has Donald Trump (DAH) & janitor (host)

— Another sketch tonight pairing Darrell’s Trump with the real deal, this time with the real Trump playing a mustached janitor.
— When this sketch originally aired in 2004, I remember how funny I found Trump’s line where he makes fun of his own hair (“My hair’s supposed to look like this – I’m a janitor”), but, much like his goofy dancing in the House Of Wings sketch earlier tonight, I now find myself not even being able to so much as chuckle at the line now. The Trump-makes-me-laugh-tonight count remains a measly 1.
— A very dull sketch so far.
— A pretty funny meta bit with Maya as the narrator intentionally and awkwardly vamping to give Darrell and Trump time to switch costumes off-camera.
STARS: *½


FATHERS AND SONS
(host)’s son (SEM) envies bond between (JIF) & dad (HOS)

— The first (and only) time all night where Trump plays a character that has nothing to do with himself, though of course, he plays this role like himself anyway.
— Trump’s delivery is killing any potential humor during the tense father & son exchanges between him and Seth.
— Oh, no. Another Fallon & Sanz pairing.
— Aaaaaaaand there goes our obligatory Fallon & Sanz breaking. What the holy fuck are they even laughing at here? Unlike most of their other character breaks, nothing appeared to provoke their character break in this sketch. Are they aware of how much this sketch has been falling flat, and are intentionally breaking to “save” the sketch (which is basically the premise of the “That’s When You Break” digital short SNL would later do, which I think even shows a clip from this sketch during one of the “And here’s another one from Fallon & Sanz” lyrics)?
— Jesus Christ, even for a Fallon & Sanz character-breaking moment, they are laughing PARTICULARLY hard in this, and it’s completely taken over the rest of this sketch. Jimmy and Horatio both pretty much just gave up on this sketch, and are laughing so hard that their faces are turning red, almost to the degree where they look like they’re going to die laughing. It sure would be nice of them to let us in on what the hell they’re laughing so hard at.
— As much as I hate to compare myself to Trump in any way, his demeanor during the endless Fallon/Sanz gigglefest, in which he’s aloofly staring off-camera with a bored, miserable look on his face while resting his fingers on his temple and looks like he’s thinking to himself “Ohhh, these two giggling idiots…”, mirrors EXACTLY how I look during this sketch.
— Seth at least makes a funny ad-lib just now, during the endless Fallon/Sanz gigglefest when both performers are supposed to be crying: “They’re so sad, they’re happy.” I remember a fellow SNL reviewer from back at this time in 2004 having a theory that Seth had that ad-libbed line prepared in his head way in advance, because he probably knew Jimmy and Horatio would break during their crying scene.
— While Jimmy and Horatio are still in the middle of their endless laughing, Horatio takes the time to point to something on a newspaper on the table in front of him (screencap below), which then makes both him and Jimmy laugh EVEN HARDER.

Now I can’t help but wonder what in the world Horatio pointed to on that newspaper, and why it contributed to him and Jimmy laughing non-stop like jackass hyenas on acid.
STARS: *


9/11 HEARINGS
prophetic Richard Clarke (DAH) testifies to his myriad unheeded warnings

— (*sigh*) I’m three minutes into this, and this sketch has been droning on and on with typical dull and unfunny 2000s-era-Jim-Downey-written dialogue that gets little-to-no reaction from neither the audience nor me.
— Are these VERY sporadic cutaways to stock footage of real senators at a hearing even supposed to be funny? SNL’s not even fully committing to this aspect of the sketch, like they usually do in State Of The Union sketches.
— Oh, god, now this is just getting desperate and juvenile, with Darrell’s Richard Clarke claiming Dick Cheney “touched me inappropriately”. Just plain dumb.
— Poor Chris Parnell is JUST NOW making his first and only appearance of the whole night here, and he’s just playing a small, bland, forgettable straight role that’s a complete waste of him. This only makes that joking implication earlier tonight about Lorne firing Chris a second time come off even more unfortunate. Chris’ airtime has gotten pretty damn bad these past few episodes, with him being stuck in featured player-level roles like the “Are we goin’ to the Baywatch?” guy who only gets shown from the back in the Gigli sketch from the Ben Affleck episode.
— Speaking of underappreciated cast members getting screwed in this episode, the great Will Forte is NOWHERE to be seen in this entire episode. A real bummer.
— This sketch is BRUTAL. Just end this already, and tell Jim Downey to get back the sense of humor he used to consistently have.
STARS: *


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest, Bootsy Collins & The Roots [real] perform “Funky Kingston”


APPRENTICE BAND
band comprising host & Apprentice co-stars rehearses “She’s Got Class”

— A second Apprentice sketch tonight? Well, at least SNL’s getting their money’s worth out of that set tonight.
— Oh, no. I do not like the looks of where this is headed, with musical instruments being revealed behind a hidden wall in the Apprentice office.
— Ugh, in typical Trump fashion, he breaks the fourth wall in an unscripted manner by smugly milking audience applause from his obvious miming of somebody else’s keyboard playing.
— No, no, no! What is this sketch throwing at me? Trump and his two Apprentice assistants/board members/whatever playing instruments and, ahem, “singing”? What did I do to deserve sitting through this? This feels like some self-indulgent bullshit that Trump probably fought to get on the air.
— What is this sketch even going for? This clearly isn’t a funny sketch. If it is trying to be funny, it’s failing. If it’s trying to be a slice-of-life sketch, it’s failing. If it’s trying to be just a fun AND entertaining musical number, it’s doubly failing.
— This feels like a precursor to a PARTICULARLY wretched and widely hated sketch from Trump’s second hosting stint years later in 2015, where he plays a laser harp instrument in a band.
— Now Maya joins in on the musical number, singing in an extremely goofy, exaggerated voice. Jesus Christ, just end this episode already. I’ve had more than enough.
STARS: *


GOODNIGHTS

IMMEDIATE POST-SHOW THOUGHTS
— (*sigh*) Well, that was… just as rough to get through as I was afraid it would be. I know Donald Trump’s 2015 episode is far more controversial and is widely considered by many SNL fans to be an absolute disaster, but my god, in terms of episode quality, tonight’s episode has to be right behind that 2015 episode. While this episode may have been controversy-free at the time, it does not hold up well AT ALL nowadays, for obvious reasons. Even if I look at Trump through pure, non-judgmental eyes, he was comedy poison in this episode (as I said earlier, my only laugh from him all night came from his “This idiot was laughing the whole time” line in the cold opening), basically sleepwalking through the episode with an unlikable, arrogant demeanor while having SNL stroke his ego for almost the entire 90 minutes. Absolutely unwatchable. And it wasn’t even just the Trump-centric stuff in this episode that I hated. As the interminable and boring 9/11 Hearings sketch, the idiotic and endless Fallon/Sanz breaking in the Fathers And Sons sketch, and the overlong and dumb Omarosa bit on Weekend Update all showed, this episode had quite a number of non-Trump stuff for me to get frustrated by. There were only TWO segments all night that I gave a passing rating to (the cold opening and Fear Factor Junior). Other than that, this episode has got to have one of the top 10 lowest rating averages of this entire SNL project of mine.


MY PERSONAL CHOICE OF “BEST OF” MOMENTS FOR THIS EPISODE, REPRESENTED WITH SCREENCAPS


HOW THIS EPISODE STACKS UP AGAINST THE PRECEDING ONE (Ben Affleck)
one of the biggest step downs imaginable


My full set of screencaps for this episode is here


TOMORROW
Janet Jackson

Posted on

March 13, 2004 – Ben Affleck / N.E.R.D. (S29 E15)

Segments are rated on a scale of 1-5 stars

DONNIE’S WEDDING
Sully & Denise attend Donnie Bartolotti’s same-sex marriage ceremony

— The final Boston Teens sketch during Jimmy’s tenure as a cast member. Interesting seeing these characters starring in a cold opening for a change, which also serves as a nice deviation from the usual political cold openings.
— Great to see Ben Affleck reprising his Donnie Bartolotti character.
— Interesting reveal of Donnie Bartolotti getting married to a man, which was very timely for this period.
— I’m watching the rerun version of this episode, which uses the dress rehearsal version of this cold opening. In this dress version, whenever the camera pans over to Sully and Denise’s reactions to finding out Donnie’s getting married to a man, Jimmy is seen genuinely cracking up for no apparent reason as usual (the fifth above screencap for this sketch), as opposed to the live version of this cold opening, in which Jimmy keeps a straight face.
— Unfortunately, with this being a gay marriage sketch in this SNL era, we have our obligatory instance of SNL presenting a man-on-man kiss as something that’s “shocking” and “hilarious”.
— Speaking of the kiss, I recall how, in the live version of this, Seth’s hand can unintentionally be seen blocking his and Ben’s lips the second time they kiss in this. Perhaps that’s why SNL uses the dress rehearsal version of this cold opening in reruns.
— A good laugh from Sully complaining to Denise that he’s always begged her for the same kind of love that Donnie and his groom have, but “you never let me try it, not even once!”
— Ugh, in typical Horatio Sanz fashion, he botches his scene, pauses awkwardly for a very long time before delivering one particular line, and cracks up at himself when exiting the shot (the last above screencap for this sketch). Jesus Christ. No words can express my annoyance towards this guy by this point of his SNL tenure. Then again, this is the dress rehearsal version I’m watching of this cold opening, so maybe I should cut Horatio a little slack this time, as performers are usually more “loose” at dress rehearsal than in the live show. I don’t remember him botching his scene in the live version of this cold opening.
— I like the callback to the odd names of all of Sully and Donnie’s buddies, which were previously mentioned in the Boston Teens sketch from the Ben Affleck-hosted episode in season 25.
STARS: ***


MONOLOGUE
having missed out on marketing “Bennifer,” host won’t get burned again

— As usual, Ben is showing himself to be a great sport about his personal life.
— A lot of laughs from the variations of the “Bennifer” portmanteau.
— Great little mention of Matt Damon at the end.
— Nice to see that this is a real monologue, with no involvement from the cast or anyone else.
STARS: ****


Z105
Joey Mack is reunited with his character-stealing former partner (host)

— We’re already getting a lot of Jimmy Fallon recurring sketches so far tonight.
— Ben’s doing a great and funny job doing a knock-off of Joey Mack’s various morning crew voices.
— I love Ben denying the similarities his Rajneesh character has to Joey Mack’s Sanji character by telling Joey “Dude, Sanji and Rajneesh are from different villages.”
— Very fun voice showdown between Ben and Joey Mack, and the audience particularly loves when it gets to the point where both guys are doing their voices simultaneously.
— I can excuse Jimmy’s constant breaking here, as I usually enjoy the fun chemistry he and Ben have in sketches.
— Of course, you know I personally loved the Three Stooges reference at the end.
— Overall, easily the best of the Z105 sketches I’ve reviewed so far.
STARS: ****


GIGLI
mentally-challenged (FRA) points out Gigli faults to host during filming

— I like how the audience laughs as soon as it’s revealed at the very beginning that this is the filming of Ben’s notorious movie Gigli.
— It feels kinda wrong to laugh at Fred’s portrayal of a mentally challenged character, but dammit, Fred is so perfect in this, and he is killing in this sketch. The fact that his mentally challenged character is actually the wisest character of the sketch also helps alleviate any troublesome aspects.
— The material in this sketch is fantastic.
— Even the way Chris keeps asking “A-are we goin’ to the Baywatch?” in that mentally challenged voice is strangely amusing. It feels like a huge waste of Chris, though, to use him in a role where he’s mostly only shown from the back and barely says anything.
— Ben is visibly and genuinely very amused during his interactions with Fred’s Frondi, but Ben just has a likable charm that makes it excusable. It also helps that we obviously don’t have to deal with seeing him break on a weekly basis on SNL, unlike Jimmy or Horatio.
— Amy: “Oh my god, Ben Affleck just yelled at that mentally challenged guy!”
STARS: *****


TV FUNHOUSE
by RBS- The Passion Of The Dumpty excerpts & George W. Bush campaign ads

— Hilarious concept for a Passion Of The Christ parody.
— The President Bush election ads that this cartoon keeps occasionally cutting to are funny, but I don’t understand what they have to do with the rest of this cartoon. They feel like too much of a non-sequitur, and are kinda bringing this down for me, as I’d rather this just focus on the Humpty Dumpty portions.
STARS: ***


APPALACHIAN EMERGENCY ROOM
yokels suffer additional unusual ailments

— Amy always kills me with her character in these sketches.
— Finesse’s character wasn’t anything special overall.
— Much like Amy, Chris is another cast member who always kills with his character in these sketches.
— Pretty funny scene involving Ben with a ferret biting his crotch. I’ll just ignore the questionable logic of how Ben’s character was able to fully put on shorts if he was nude when the ferret bit into his crotch.
— I like the little detail of Ben having named his ferret Ferrets Bueller.
— A lot of people seem to hate these sketches. I myself didn’t care much for these sketches back when they originally aired, but I’ve been coming around on them on these re-watches. Some decent amusing silliness in these.
STARS: ***


ONLY BANGKOK
(SEM) is glad “what happens in Thailand, stays in Thailand”

— A very funny “What happens in Thailand” reveal at the end, after the grim situation we see involving Seth and a dead hooker.
STARS: ***½


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “She Wants To Move”


WEEKEND UPDATE
FIM responds in kind to nasty letters written by bill collectors

Diana Ross (MAR) will again try to serve 48 consecutive hours in jail

George W. Bush & John Kerry volleys leave Bill Clinton (DAH) unimpressed

— Tonight’s audience has been so lively that you can even hear them cheer very early on during the opening title sequence of tonight’s Update, which is noteworthy because audiences usually cheer when the Update opening title sequence is about to end.
— Finesse’s overall stand-up commentary was actually good. Much better than the last stand-up commentary he did on Update in this season’s premiere.
— Ugh, another Diana Ross commentary from Maya. Wasn’t the last one she did a few episodes ago annoying enough?
— An overall mercifully short Diana Ross commentary, but still didn’t really make me laugh.
— WTF? A Darrell-as-Bill-Clinton Update commentary for the SECOND EPISODE IN A ROW? I love Darrell’s Clinton as much as the next guy, but this is a bit much, especially since, as far as I know, Clinton wasn’t even in the news around this time.
— Boy, they’re really milking the hell out of Darrell-as-Clinton’s interactions with Tina and Jimmy at the beginning of his commentary tonight. That feels unneeded.
— That’s it? The Clinton commentary is over? It just came and went without me laughing a single time, which is absolutely unheard of for me in regards to Darrell’s Clinton. It was definitely unnecessary and pointless to bring him back this week. And between bringing back both him and Diana Ross so soon, tonight’s Update feels lazy and half-assed, at least in regards to most of the commentaries. Jimmy and Tina’s jokes aren’t too bad tonight, for the most part.
STARS: **½


TOP O’ THE MORNING
Patrick & William remember St. Patrick’s Days past

— Tonight’s Jimmy Fallon Recurring Character Fest continues.
— Not only is this surprisingly the first appearance this recurring sketch is making all season, but it ends up being its final appearance.
— I’ve said this in several past episode reviews, but I always get a kick out of whenever an SNL sketch does flashback sequences in real-time.
— After one of several real-time flashback sequences, Seth says “It’s a good thing we always wear the same sweaters” (referring to how he and Jimmy are wearing the same clothes in the flashbacks that they’re wearing in present day), which genuinely cracks Jimmy up. I’m assuming that line was an ad-lib, and it reminded me a lot of a famous moment in the Gap Girls At Tater Junction sketch from season 19’s Sara Gilbert episode, where David Spade says the memorable line “I can’t believe we’re all wearing the same thing we did four days ago” after a scene transition to four days later. As I mentioned in my review of that sketch, I’ve never seen it confirmed whether that line from Spade was an ad-lib or not, but it probably wasn’t (as much as I’d like to think it was).
— A particularly funny flashback sequence right now, with Finesse and Kenan (the latter making his only appearance of the night) being seen as Jimmy and Seth’s characters.
— Ben busts out laughing HARD at Jimmy’s ad-lib (and this was unquestionably an ad-lib) about Will sounding more Scottish than Irish. It takes Ben a while to get back into character after this.
— Lots of amused ad-libbing between Ben, Jimmy, and Seth, especially after Horatio’s wild brief appearance. I recall hearing from an online SNL fan who went to this episode’s dress rehearsal that the dress version of this sketch featured even more ad-libbing between Ben, Jimmy, and Seth after Horatio’s appearance. You see, in the dress version of this sketch, after Horatio crashed through the breakaway wall, stagehands replaced Horatio with a body double (or a dummy, I forget which) that was noticeably wearing completely different shoes from the ones Horatio was just seen wearing, and Ben, Jimmy, and Seth had a freakin’ FIELD DAY riffing on that with lots of ad-libs while cracking up.
STARS: ***


ONLY BANGKOK
to pay off a gambling debt, host sells new wife (AMP)

— A hilarious eventual reveal of Ben playing himself during this crazy scene of him selling his wife to pay off gambling debts.
— Good reveal of another “What happens in Thailand” tagline, making you realize this is an unrelated second installment of the Only Bangkok ad.
STARS: ****


DONNIE G. AND SIDECAR
cycle cop Donnie G. (host) puts partner Sidecar (FRA) in harm’s way

— Very refreshing and rare to see this type of sketch in this SNL era. I’m loving how this feels like the type of old-timey, black-and-white sketches that appeared frequently in SNL’s late 80s era. I can easily imagine Fred’s role being played by either Jon Lovitz or Dana Carvey.
— After Will experienced a big increase in lead roles the last two episodes before tonight’s, I see that tonight is Fred’s time to shine. Fred’s been having a great night, between the Gigli sketch and this.
— A big laugh from Fred getting knocked out by a huge mailbox.
— The Caracci’s Pizza logo on the apron that Horatio’s wearing is actually from a sketch from the season 18 episode that Tim Robbins hosted.

— Solid ending.
STARS: ****


ONLY BANGKOK
scandal-quashing Thailand spares host & Kelly Ripa [real]

— A great way to conclude this Only Bangkok runner, making certain aspects from the first two unrelated Only Bangkok ads come together in a crazy way.
— A hilarious random walk-on from Kelly Ripa. She’s surprising me by how funny she is here.
— Overall, this insane ad was absolutely priceless.
STARS: ****½


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “Maybe”


THE FULL MOON KILLER
serial killer’s (host) co-workers have fun with his ill-kept secret

— I’m really enjoying this premise and Ben’s casual attempts to hide the fact that he’s the Full Moon Killer.
— I love the reactions when Ben finds out his co-workers were just pulling his leg and have always been aware that he’s the Full Moon Killer.
— A great “And he was!” ending.
— An overall very well-written and perfectly executed sketch that, much like the Donnie G. And Sidecar sketch, feels like something that easily could’ve appeared in a much earlier SNL era that did this type of sketch more often. Though this sketch also does remind me a little of the Clark Kent sketch from just a few years prior when The Rock first hosted. I love both that sketch and this one.
STARS: ****½


GOODNIGHTS

IMMEDIATE POST-SHOW THOUGHTS
— Easily one of the best episodes of this season, and may even be my personal favorite of the season. Lots of strong sketches, one classic in my eyes (Gigli), and not a single weak sketch to be found (not counting a less-than-satisfactory Weekend Update). Despite laughing his way through the episode, Ben Affleck was an excellent host, much like the first time he hosted, and he added a fun, likable, and positive vibe to the episode.


MY PERSONAL CHOICE OF “BEST OF” MOMENTS FOR THIS EPISODE, REPRESENTED WITH SCREENCAPS


HOW THIS EPISODE STACKS UP AGAINST THE PRECEDING ONE (Colin Firth)
a step up


My full set of screencaps for this episode is here


TOMORROW
(……………………………………..*hesitates for 20 long minutes, because I’m afraid to say who the next host is*……………………………………..*hesitates for 20 more minutes*……………………………………..) Oh, hell, I have to say it. DONALD. TRUMP.

Posted on

March 6, 2004 – Colin Firth / Norah Jones (S29 E14)

Segments are rated on a scale of 1-5 stars

NIGHTLINE
Rosie O’Donnell (HOS) on Martha Stewart (ANG) guilty verdict

— Another Nightline cold opening so soon?
— Some funny lines from Kenan.
— Will’s smug “bitch” talk is making me laugh.
— Oh, god, fucking spare me. Horatio’s tired Rosie O’Donnell impression for the second damn episode in a row. Ugh.
— Hell, yeah! The return of Ana Gasteyer and her Martha Stewart impression. Feels so good to see Ana for the first time since she left the cast.
— Seeing Darrell’s Ted Koppel and Ana’s Martha Stewart speaking to each other interestingly makes me feel like I’m watching something from around season 23.
STARS: ***½


MONOLOGUE
AMP, MAR, RAD, SEM are excited to act alongside charismatic host

— I like Amy telling Colin Firth “You’re the first real actor we’ve had on the show in a long time”, as it’s SNL acknowledging their own questionable decision to have lots of unconventional non-actor hosts this season. Of course, that still doesn’t stop SNL from continuing to go overboard with unconventional, non-actor hosts in the final two months of this season.
— Maya: “I tried to get Ian McKellen to do Shakespeare with me, but he would only talk to Jimmy and Kylie Minogue.”
— Rachel: “I’ve just always had a fantasy of putting on one of these corset things and going to town on some English dude.”
— Great to get the return of Seth’s uncanny Hugh Grant impression.
— I like the little joke with Seth having Amy’s panties in his pockets, hinting at a relationship between the two.
— A big laugh from Colin asking Seth to do his self-proclaimed great Hugh Grant impression, being unaware that he had just done it.
STARS: ***½


ACCENTS
British actor’s (host) awful Southern accent derails Civil War movie

— Meh, I’m not caring at all for the main joke with Colin’s American accent being effeminate and flamboyant. Yet another display of this SNL era’s love of gay stereotypes.
— Finesse In A Dress alert. And do we need Jimmy stifling his laughter during this Finesse-in-drag walk-on, as if he’s never seen it before?
— Uh-oh, now we get Chris doing a very stereotypical Asian accent.
— A lame “project scrapped” ending that SNL would go on to lazily reuse in a few other sketches that they clearly didn’t know how to end.
STARS: *½


¡SHOW BIZ GRANDE EXPLOSION!
Fericito helps host with his joke delivery

— Interesting seeing Fericito starring in his own sketch. But damn, does it have to be in a typical lazy talk format?
— Horatio is okay as Fericito’s bandleader.
— Meh, all of Fericito’s “Ay dios mio!”s get tiring after a while, and he’s been doing it ad nausaem in this sketch.
— I like how Colin’s various jokes are falling flat with both Fericito and the bandleader.
STARS: ***


TV FUNHOUSE
by RBS- Michael Powell announces FCC’s cartoon bowdlerization standards

 

— A lot of laughs from the unnecessary censoring done to classic cartoon clips.
— Great Howard Stern ending, paying homage to the ending of the legendary Daffy Duck cartoon Duck Amuck.
STARS: ****


TRIAL
guilty Tim Calhoun leans on lawyer (host) for Senate committee testimony

— Wow, interesting how Fred and Will’s respective breakout character, Fericito and Tim Calhoun, who, in the past, have only appeared on Weekend Update and hosts’ monologues, have both been spun-off into their own sketch on the same night. Fericito is okay, but I’m far more onboard with the idea of Tim Calhoun starring in a sketch, as he’s always a killer character. This would end up being his only non-Weekend Update appearance.
— Some good laughs from Calhoun always having to be fed his answers from Colin, word-by-word.
— I love the audio tape played of Calhoun’s money-laundering scheme.
— While I prefer Calhoun delivering non-sequitur one-liners like he typically does in his Update appearances, he’s definitely still working for me in this sketch.
— Tim Calhoun: “What if you didn’t have the tape?” Chris: “Well, we DO have the tape.” Tim Calhoun: “Ohhh, nooooo!”
— Odd how the sketch just ends on an extended close-up of Chris. Feels like that’s not intentional.
STARS: ****


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “Sunrise”


WEEKEND UPDATE
MAR reports as WASP housewives riot in protest of Martha Stewart verdict

award-laden Peter Jackson (HOS) secures pity prize for Elijah Wood (RAD)

Bill Clinton (DAH) explains why he should be John Kerry’s running mate

— Boy, some really weak opening jokes from Tina about Martha Stewart.
— Interesting how they’re doing a remote segment with Maya playing herself as a reporter. Feels like a throwback to the original days where Laraine Newman was Update’s regular reporter for remote segments.
— The Martha Stewart riots segment is okay.
— At the end of the Martha Stewart riots segment, couldn’t they have given Amy something funnier to yell into Maya’s microphone than a simple “Free Martha!”? The brief buildup to that had me expecting a great one-liner from Amy.
— Very funny seeing Rachel play Elijah Wood. There really is a strong facial resemblance between them, and I kinda wish SNL had gotten some mileage out of that when Elijah had recently hosted a few months prior.
— Ugh, typical awkward halting and hesitation during Horatio’s line deliveries. Dammit, Horatio.
— I like Darrell’s Bill Clinton greeting Jimmy as “Fallonius”, as a callback to the nickname bit that Jimmy and Tina did earlier in this Update.
— Darrell’s Clinton saying John Edwards is so boring, he’d have sex in the missionary position is a line that SNL already had Darrell’s Clinton say about another politician in an earlier Clinton sketch (I think the cold opening from the Christina Ricci episode in season 25).
— Some fun lines from Darrell’s Clinton. I especially like his ending line, when expressing interest in becoming John Kerry’s running mate: “I’ll put the ‘vice’ back in ‘vice president’.”
STARS: ***


HOTEL WILSON
bellboy (KET) attempts to personally service (host)’s prostitute request

— Kenan’s random attempts to sexually assault Colin are getting no reaction from the audience (nor me).
— It feels kinda weird seeing early-era Kenan doing this type of raunchy material. I almost feel like I’m watching his Nickelodeon-era teen self doing adult material he’s too young for.
— Boy, this sketch is terrible. Yet another display of this SNL era’s annoying love of hacky homoerotic humor (which only gets worse the following season).
— Awful ending.
— Overall, not a single laugh from me during this entire sketch.
STARS: *


MEET THE PRESS
John Edwards’ (WLF) so-called attack ads are pro-Kerry

— Quite a lot of airtime for Darrell tonight.
— Boy, that smiling photo of John Kerry in the first attack ad is just plain creepy (the third, fourth, and fifth above screencaps for this sketch), especially the way the camera is slowly zooming in on it.
— Some laughs from John Edwards’ so-called “negative” ads against John Kerry.
— This sketch feels a little slow and dull, and isn’t making me laugh too much outside of the aforementioned “negative” ads. I want to like this more than I am, especially considering how much Will has been knocking it out of the park with all of the other lead roles he’s been getting these past few episodes (great to see him getting such an increase in airtime, by the way, even though I know in retrospect that it sadly doesn’t last).
STARS: **½


THE SOPRANOS
after a 15-month hiatus, The Sopranos can’t remember their plot lines

— Wow, Darrell’s big night continues. I cannot remember the last time he got this many lead roles in a single episode.
— I got a good laugh from Seth’s little “Oh, snap” when dashing out of the house after being told he’s supposed to be in Italy.
— Jimmy is hilarious as Little Steven.
— An okay concept of The Sopranos’ own characters not even remembering what happened the preceding season due to the extremely long hiatus between seasons.
STARS: ***


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “What Am I To You?”


JESUS: HOLLYWOOD VS HISTORY
Benny Hill (WLF) film has lust, not passion

— Second episode in a row with a History Channel sketch.
— Very funny idea of a Benny Hill-starring Jesus epic.
— I recall an online SNL fan once saying that this movie-within-a-sketch’s opening shot of Will’s Benny Hill on the cross is one of the most bizarre images in SNL history. That open-mouthed “Woe is me” expression on Will’s face during that opening shot of him on the cross (the second above screencap for this sketch) kills me every time I watch this sketch.
— An absolutely hilarious turn with Benny Hill’s Jesus doing a typical wacky fast-paced chase scene with two bikini-clad girls while he’s still nailed to the cross.
— Funny ending line from Colin about how Benny Hill was so emotionally crushed by the movie’s failure that he died “just 18 years later”.
STARS: ****½


GOODNIGHTS

IMMEDIATE POST-SHOW THOUGHTS
— A decent episode. A few things really didn’t work for me (particularly Hotel Wilson, which, if I didn’t know better, I would swear is a season 30 sketch), but they were outnumbered by what worked, especially a few great Will Forte-starring pieces and a solid TV Funhouse.


MY PERSONAL CHOICE OF “BEST OF” MOMENTS FOR THIS EPISODE, REPRESENTED WITH SCREENCAPS


HOW THIS EPISODE STACKS UP AGAINST THE PRECEDING ONE (Christina Aguilera)
a mild step up


My full set of screencaps for this episode is here


TOMORROW
Ben Affleck

Posted on

February 21, 2004 – Christina Aguilera / Maroon 5 (S29 E13)

Segments are rated on a scale of 1-5 stars

HARDBALL WITH CHRIS MATTHEWS
Gary Bauer (CHP) & Rosie O’Donnell (HOS) debate gay marriage

— A lot of technical screw-ups with the name graphics early on in this sketch, as seen in some of the above screencaps.
— Horatio’s Rosie O’Donnell is starting to approach the same levels of annoyance for me as Horatio’s Elton John.
— Interesting how Darrell is playing dual roles here, with his Arnold Schwarzenegger being pre-taped.
— Hmm, Darrell’s usually-off Schwarzenegger impression actually sounds better than usual in pre-taped form. Maybe SNL has finally found the solution in improving Darrell’s Schwarzenegger.
— Darrell’s Schwarzenegger is basically just repeating same lines about gays that he said in the cold opening from this season’s premiere.
— This season’s streak of forgettably average Hardball sketches sadly continues. It’s becoming more and more obvious that the glory days of Hardball being a sure-fire killer sketch are behind us.
STARS: ***


MONOLOGUE
after declining requests to “whore it up,” host performs “Beautiful”

— Pretty good bit with Christina Aguilera calling Jimmy out on the acute/askanky joke he did about her on Weekend Update earlier this season, complete with a clip of said joke.
— As I said in an earlier episode review, the joke of Lorne playing a horndog towards the host and/or musical guest has gotten overplayed. Also, this monologue is starting to feel like Part 2 of Halle Berry’s monologue from earlier this season, and I already disliked Part 1 enough.
— When Lorne asks the guys “Who’s that?” in regards to Finesse, and is then told “That’s the new guy, Finesse”, I love Lorne incredulously asking “We hired a guy named Finesse?!?”
— At least Christina’s singing of “Beautiful” (a song she already performed on SNL a year prior) isn’t being done as a full-fledged musical performance with her going to the musical guest stage.
STARS: **½


SEX AND THE CITY
finale has punny Carrie (AMP) & shemale Samantha (host)

— An absolutely PERFECT Samantha impression from Christina. Shockingly good.
— Some good laughs from Rachel’s poor handling of the obviously fake baby she’s holding.
— I’m having a hard time buying Amy as Sarah Jessica Parker.
— This comedic premise of Samantha coming out as a “tranny” will probably not hold up well with a lot of people nowadays. However, Christina is selling it so damn hard that it’s still working for me, even if I’m not finding this material quite as hilarious as I remember finding it in 2004.
STARS: ***½


DO YOU KNOW WHO MY FATHER IS?
snotty scions ply privilege on game show

— Feels like we haven’t seen an original game show sketch like this in quite a long time, though I’m probably forgetting something.
— Chris doing his usual solid and low-key-funny work as a game show host.
— Seth’s accented, high-pitched delivery of “Do you know who my father is?” was so over-the-top that it cracked me up.
— Will: “I can’t even GO to Switzerland. Stupid date rape trial!”
— Despite some laughs, this sketch as a whole is pretty forgettable.
STARS: **½


TV FUNHOUSE
“Fun With Real Audio” by RBS- banal showbiz questions haunt Pat O’Brien

— Robert Smigel apparently continues to be very busy elsewhere, as this is surprisingly on his THIRD TV Funhouse of the season.
— Oh, geez, what is with SNL’s Access Hollywood obsession this season? I’ve gotten so sick of these frequent Access Hollywood parodies that not even Smigel can make me excited to see another one.
— I guess I see what this cartoon is going for, but this isn’t working much for me.
— Not even the part with the Dalai Lama beating up Pat O’Brien made me laugh much.
— Meh, the joke about O’Brien being dropped down to hell, which turns out to be Access Hollywood, felt like an inferior version of a joke used in a David Brenner-starring TV Funhouse from season 23.
— Overall, I seem to be in the minority, but I did not care for this cartoon.
STARS: **


CELEBRATION OF WOMEN WEEK
in 1880, liberated (host) challenges stuffy women to flout the status quo

— An out-of-the-ordinary use of Darrell’s Phil Donahue impression. Reminds me of his Jack Perkins hosting that jazz profile show sketch from the preceding season’s Queen Latifah episode.
— Rachel’s old-timey dignified accent and facial expressions are very funny.
— Great exit line from Chris: “If you need me, I’ll be discussing negroes in the brandy room.” Reminds me of his great exit line from the Governess sketch in the Andy Roddick episode earlier this season: “Your mom and I have some bedroom-related things to work out.”
— Some funny lines from the women about how oppressed they’ve always been.
STARS: ***


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “This Love”


WEEKEND UPDATE
ignorant white guy WLF is ill-suited to honor Black History Month

— I like the fake-out with Kenan being introduced for a Black History Month commentary, only for Will to unexpectedly show up in his place while Kenan’s name still gets displayed in a graphic on the bottom of the screen.
— A great line with Will rude answer to Tina’s question of why Maya can’t do the Black History Month commentary: “Tina, it’s not Half-Black History Month.”
— Hilarious part with Will calling out individual black audience members to wish a happy Black History Month to.
— Will is so damn fantastic in this Black History Month piece, and it’s so nice seeing him get to shine while playing himself for once. Moments like this really solidify what a strong secret weapon he is on SNL in these early years of his.
— A nice little shoutout to Bill Murray during Jimmy and Tina’s sign-off, with Jimmy wishing Bill luck at the Oscars, as he was up for Best Actor for Lost In Translation. (He would end up losing and would famously have an openly bitter reaction.)
— Another short Update, for the second episode in a row.
STARS: ***


YOU GOT SERVED
Venice Beach teens serve up lame moves during a low-stakes dance-off

— The beginning of this sketch feels oddly silent. It feels like there should be background music or something.
— Boy, I can tell I’m going to hate this sketch. This feels like a variation of that very unfunny Wade Robson Project sketch from this season’s premiere. Sketches like this epitomize some of the MANY problems I have with this 2003-2005 SNL era.
— Blah. Not a single one of these dance moves from any of the performers is funny. At least in the Wade Robson sketch, we only had to sit through a dance sequence from three performers. This sketch, on the other hand, has, like, seven performers who’s individual dance sequence I have to suffer through.
— There goes Maya using that lean-all-the-way-back-in-a-staccato-manner dance move ONCE AGAIN. She’s taken a once-hilarious dance move that was great when she debuted it in that MTV Spring Break sketch with her and Cameron Diaz, and has completely run it into the ground by this point of her SNL tenure.
— Christina’s dance sequence came off just plain lazy compared to the rest of the cast (or maybe she forgot that her dancing is supposed to be COMEDIC), which is ironic, as she has far more professional dance experience than any of the cast members in this sketch.
— Not even Will could save this sketch with his goofy walk-on at the end.
STARS: *


DRESSING ROOM
host rejects “skank” tag implicit in well-wishers’ backhanded compliments

— Kenan In A Dress alert.
— Finesse’s Al Reynolds constantly being referred to as Stedman is making me laugh, even though it kinda feels like a hacky joke.
— Some of the many sexual euphemisms being said to Christina are funny, but this sketch in general isn’t all that great and and feels too repetitive.
— Another instance this season of Horatio pulling a Chris Farley and crashing through a breakaway table. Meh. However, I did like Amy’s Sharon Osbourne explaining to Christina why Horatio’s Ozzy fainted: “You made Ozzy think!”
STARS: **½


BESOS Y LAGRIMAS
maid (host) inspires kisses & tears in telenovela

— This sketch makes its debut and would go on to appear VERY sporadically within the next six(!) years just about every time SNL has a Hispanic host. Speaking of which, I recall hearing that tonight’s installment originally got cut after dress rehearsal from the preceding season’s Salma Hayek episode, which Christina was the musical guest of.
— The bizarre nature of this sketch is cracking me up, as are the increasingly over-the-top dramatic close-ups of characters.
— The format of this sketch is almost starting to give me a very unwanted reminder of the future Californians sketches (a very polarizing recurring sketch that I despise with the fire of 1,000 suns), but this is miles funnier to me.
— When the camera showed a (very funny) close-up of an eyepatch-wearing Chris during the current sequence of each character being shown in a dramatic close-up, why didn’t he say “Helena” like everybody else is saying in their respective close-up? Was that an intentional joke?
STARS: ***½


HUGGIES THONG
— Oh, you’ve gotta be fucking kidding me. We’re only a little over halfway through this season, and this is the FOURTH DAMN TIME this commercial has been shown this season. Ridiculous. This may possibly have broken the record for most frequently repeated fake ad in the shortest amount of time, until season 31 eventually comes along and replays the living fuck out of that Morgan Stanley ad (the one with Will angrily chewing out Amy and then-newbie Andy Samberg as if he’s Amy’s father, only for him to be revealed as Amy’s family’s Morgan Stanley guy) within just the first few months of that season.


FIRING SANDY
(CHP) fires childishly insubordinate employee (WLF) for absenteeism

— I love the bizarre opening conversation Chris has with Amy regarding his lunch order.
— Hilarious how Will claims that he took one of his many sick days because he had the Elephant Man’s Disease.
— The insane dialogue in this sketch is having me howling.
— After one of Will’s many utterances of “No way, Jose”, I absolutely love Chris angrily responding “Stop using my first name, it’s disrespectful!”
— I’m surprised this sketch is over already, after only about two minutes, but this was a good length.
— Not only was this the usual fantastic Oddball Will Forte Sketch, and not only was this Will’s second strong showcase in tonight’s episode alone, but it was also great to see him paired with Chris (who, like Will, is one of the secret weapons of this cast, only SNL seems far less aware of that than they are with Will), who more than held his own in this sketch. Between the great U-S-Amen bit from the preceding season and now this sketch, I’m starting to think that the Forte/Parnell comedy duo is something we viewers needed to see MUCH more often than we do in this era.
STARS: ****½


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “Harder To Breathe”


DON’S APOTHECARY
apothecary Don’s lack of discretion creates more customers for Walgreens

— The second and final installment of this sketch.
— Blah. Much like last time, this sketch is just a series of unfunny sophomoric jokes. In other words, typical unfunny Horatio Sanz jackassery, which I am beyond sick of by this point of his SNL tenure. I mentioned in my review of the first installment of this sketch that Horatio intended for these Don’s Apothecary sketches to be a relatable, slice-of-life piece that he based off of something from his own childhood. I appreciate the idea he had behind these sketches, but it is so sad that THIS is the result of his attempt at a so-called “relatable” and “slice-of-life” piece.
— Maya got a good laugh from me with her delivery of “It’s for the vagina, baby.”
— Another funny Maya line, with her telling Rachel “You go ahead and buy your ‘gina cream, baby.” She’s becoming the sole highlight of this entire sketch.
— Ugh, another Walgreens twist at the end. It wasn’t funny in the first installment of this sketch, and it’s just plain lazy to just repeat it a second time. Thank god this ends up being the final installment of this lousy recurring sketch.
STARS: *½


GOODNIGHTS

— After I had just shit on Horatio in my review of the last sketch, I will say that I appreciate the fun bit during these goodnights with him driving his motorized cart (from the last sketch) around outside of the home base stage. You rarely see anything out of the ordinary like that happen during the goodnights by this point of SNL’s run.

IMMEDIATE POST-SHOW THOUGHTS
— A mixed bag. There was about an equal amount of things I liked and disliked… actually, the latter probably slightly outnumbers the former. Can’t think of anything else worth saying about this episode.


MY PERSONAL CHOICE OF “BEST OF” MOMENTS FOR THIS EPISODE, REPRESENTED WITH SCREENCAPS


HOW THIS EPISODE STACKS UP AGAINST THE PRECEDING ONE (Drew Barrymore)
a slight step up


My full set of screencaps for this episode is here


TOMORROW
Colin Firth

Posted on

February 14, 2004 – Drew Barrymore / Kelis (S29 E12)

Segments are rated on a scale of 1-5 stars

ENDORSEMENT
John Kerry (SEM) doesn’t want bad-luck charm Al Gore (DAH) to endorse him

— Seth’s got John Kerry’s smile down pretty well, but does he have to keep briefly flashing it so often throughout this cold opening? He’s pushing that smile WAY too hard in this.
— A laugh from Darrell-as-Al-Gore’s odd delivery of “IIIIIIIII’ve decided to suppoooort yoooouuuu.”
— The “crackle crackle” bit Seth’s Kerry uses as an excuse to end the phone conversation with Gore made me laugh, but it’s a cliched joke.
— Aside from the aforementioned two decent bits (and not even those were particularly hilarious), this overall cold opening did not have many laughs. Typical dull Jim Downey political writing from this period.
STARS: **


MONOLOGUE
E.T. (WLF) visits, as do ’80s sci-fi characters host didn’t co-star with

— Good makeup on Will as E.T.
— Meh. I’m not caring for the direction this has gone in, with characters from non-Drew Barrymore movies mistakenly thinking Drew was in their movies. Lazy premise that shows the writers didn’t know what else to do for this monologue. This probably would’ve been better off just focusing on Will’s E.T.
— Is that an ad-lib Darrell made after stumbling over the word “sith”? Drew seemed genuinely amused.
STARS: **


A VERY SPECIAL VALENTINE’S VERSACE
Courtney Love (host) lays waste

— Blah. Are they going to trot out this Versace impression for EVERY holiday this season? First it was Halloween, then Christmas, now Valentine’s Day. Is Easter next up on the queue?
— This sketch is really going through the motions. This Versace routine is simply past its prime by this point, as is Horatio’s Elton John shtick (though I’m pretty sure the latter never had a prime to begin with).
— I finally got one laugh just now, from Versace’s slam to Amy’s Madonna about Dennis Rodman “boning you sideways”.
— Feels a little odd seeing somebody other than Molly Shannon play Courtney Love.
— The audience is eating up Drew-as-Courtney-Love’s violent outbursts, but it’s doing absolutely nothing for me.
— Ugh, they are dragging the hell out of the bit with Versace repeatedly asking Courtney Love to not smash Versace’s cherished figurines, which I get is supposed to be funny because of how drawn-out it is, but it’s just annoying me.
— Double ugh, now there goes these Versace sketches’ obligatory endless repetition of the word “bitch”. As I said in my review of the Versace sketch from the preceding season’s Salma Hayek episode, “These Versace sketches need to realize that the word ‘bitch’ stops being funny when it’s thrown around so frequently in such a short time frame.”
STARS: *½


JARRET’S ROOM
Gobi’s hot stoner sister (host) appears in dream sequence

— Surprisingly, this is the first appearance this recurring sketch has made all season. I’m glad they rightfully cut back big-time on the frequency of these sketches, after how heavily overused it was in the preceding season.
— An unintentional laugh from how a whole bunch of teen Jimmy Fallon fangirls in the audience can be heard loudly going “Awwww!” after Jarret says he doesn’t have a valentine this year.
— The “pipe” that Jarret is smoking in the fantasy sequence is fairly funny (the second-to-last above screencap for this sketch).
— The fantasy sequence is being awkwardly executed, but it has a bit of a charm.
— Jesus Christ, as if it weren’t obvious enough that Jarret’s Room is such a Wayne’s World knock-off, tonight’s Jarret’s Room installment follows up the fantasy sequence with an “I guess it was all a dream… or was it?!? (*sees something in reality from the dream*)” bit, which was a staple of Wayne’s World sketches that involved fantasy sequences. Way to be original, Jarret’s Room writers.
STARS: **½


ACCESS HOLLYWOOD
Charlize Theron (host) gets ugly for acting accolades

— The silly movie clips feel like cheap laughs. Drew is pulling it off okay enough, but I’m still not crazy about the clips.
— Enough with the damn “Pat O’Brien can’t breathe through his nose” jokes. It’s beyond played-out by this point.
STARS: **½


OCTANE
motorcycle movie’s special effects comprise toys & lighter fluid

— Brief J.B. Smoove appearance!
— Kenan’s intense delivery during his brief scene was very funny.
— Not sure what to say about this overall. I got laughs from the fast-paced insanity of this and from the use of cheap model toys for the “action” scenes, but this commercial went by really fast and was kinda hard to follow.
STARS: **½


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “Milkshake”


WEEKEND UPDATE
imprisoned Diana Ross (MAR) contrasts life behind bars with glory days

— Not caring much for this commentary with Diana Ross in prison, and they’re overdoing her “Jail is not like that” statements.
— Holy hell, that’s it?!? Update is over ALREADY?!? Wow, this Update was only about five minutes long. At least Jimmy and Tina’s jokes were mostly decent. Could’ve used a better guest commentary, though.
STARS: ***


MIKE’S BAR
John Kerry (SEM), George W. Bush (WLF), Bill Clinton (DAH) meet at Yale

— We get the debut of Will’s George W. Bush impression, making this the THIRD time in just these past two seasons that the Bush impression has been given to somebody new. Interesting how Will’s Bush is making its debut in a sketch set several decades prior. Can’t remember any other time in SNL history where an important impression of a current president debuted in such a manner.
— Right out of the gate, Will’s Bush impression is coming off as a huge improvement over both Chris and (especially) Darrell’s Bush impressions. Will sounds enough like Bush here, and most importantly, his impression is very fun, immediately making you get onboard with it.
— A good and creative setting of Bush, John Kerry, and Bill Clinton meeting each other in the 1960s, and this sketch is being executed well.
— A great line from Darrell’s Clinton, asking Seth’s Kerry, in regards to Drew’s Hillary Rodham, “Hey, G.I. Joe, why don’t you do us all a favor and jump on THAT grenade?”
— There’s Seth briefly flashing that Kerry smile once again. It’s as if that smile is the only thing Seth personally feels he’s nailed about John Kerry, so he’s overcompensating by relying very heavily on it.
STARS: ****


LARRY KING LIVE
flighty Anna Nicole Smith (host) has lost weight

— Quite a lot of entertainment show spoofs tonight with Jimmy as the host, between Access Hollywood and now this.
— For various reasons, it feels odd seeing Jimmy playing Larry King. I’m also not caring much for his impression. He’s not sounding believable in the role.
— I remember the trainwreck Anna Nicole Smith interview this sketch is spoofing.
— The “biscuit” bit at the end was funny, but this overall sketch just kinda came and went with mostly only mild-at-best chuckles from me.
STARS: **


SPY GLASS
Ian & Zoe point the lens at their own scandalous behavior

— Like the first time this sketch appeared, we get some pretty fun bad puns from Seth and Amy’s characters.
— Seth’s delivery gets better and better with each passing installment of this sketch, and he had a string of particularly funny puns about Diana Ross just now.
— Geez, we get the unnecessary return of Jimmy’s British Pat O’Brien, as well as the return of more tepid “Pat O’Brien can’t breathe through his nose” jokes. Ugh, ENOUGH with this shit.
STARS: ***


THE WORLD OF SCOTT WAINIO
people talk into a microphone-free hand

— The no-longer-on-the-show Jeff Richards does the voice-over intro at the beginning of this, proving that this is a segment that had been sitting on SNL’s shelf for a while.
— Uh… okay, this is certainly something different. At least we’re getting a change of pace for this SNL era. I like the idea of this era doing a short film starring an unknown SNL writer.
— Just when I thought I’d be onboard for this, I end up being very put off by the result. How is Scott Wainio interviewing people with an invisible microphone supposed to be even remotely funny? This feels like a failed attempt at the type of absurdist, alternative humor that I usually love. And why does Wainio keep suggestively rubbing some of the men he’s interviewing?
— Overall, I’m all for SNL trying offbeat concepts, but yeah, this did NOT work for me.
— “The World of Scott Wainio” seems like it was being set up to eventually become a recurring segment (in fact, when this originally aired, I remember wondering if SNL was attempting a new-age Rocket Report type of segment), but we end up never seeing this return. I wouldn’t have minded seeing this get a second shot, as long as it had an actual funny concept, unlike tonight’s.
STARS: **


THE WHITE STRIPES
ostensible crime fighters Jack (JIF) & Meg (host) White just play music

— Poor Chris has been practically non-existent tonight.
— Jimmy, on the other hand, has been EVERYWHERE tonight.
— Interesting concept of The White Stripes as superheroes.
— Meh. The twist with The White Stripes’ self-played superhero theme song being so long that the criminals get away is a cliched gag that I swear SNL used to better effect another time, though I can’t remember when.
— Very weak ending.
STARS: **


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “Trick Me”


PRINCE SHOW
Beyonce Knowles (MAR) mediates Pink (host) guest spot

— This sketch makes its debut. Kinda surprising in retrospect to see that this debuted as a 10-to-1 sketch.
— While this is yet another damn celebrity-hosted talk show sketch, an overused concept of which I’ve griped about many times, Fred’s Prince impression and the eccentric setting of this sketch seem like they’ll be fun.
— Drew has done a celebrity impression in almost every single sketch tonight. I’m not caring much for her take on Pink in this particular sketch. Feels like she’s just doing a poor man’s variation of Amy’s Avril Lavigne impression.
— Such a spot-on Prince impression from Fred, which makes sense, given what a devoted Prince fanatic Fred is said to be.
— Kenan’s performance as George Clinton is kinda making me laugh.
— All the oddball little segments Prince does throughout this are amusing and entertaining.
— I believe we’ve gotten our very first “Kenan reacts” moment in SNL history, when the camera does a brief cutaway to Kenan’s George Clinton speechlessly staring in confusion at Prince’s odd mask routine (screencap below).

— Overall, a good debut for this sketch. I personally feel this should’ve stayed a one-off. IIRC, the subsequent installments of this sketch don’t offer anything particularly new or exciting, and the concept gradually wears thin.
STARS: ***½


GOODNIGHTS

IMMEDIATE POST-SHOW THOUGHTS
— A blah episode. There were way too many things that I didn’t care for in this episode, particularly in the first half of the show, in which I didn’t give ANYTHING a passing rating. Overall, I’m sure I’ll go on to remember absolutely nothing about this episode, aside from the Mike’s Bar sketch.


MY PERSONAL CHOICE OF “BEST OF” MOMENTS FOR THIS EPISODE, REPRESENTED WITH SCREENCAPS


HOW THIS EPISODE STACKS UP AGAINST THE PRECEDING ONE (Megan Mullally)
a big step down


My full set of screencaps for this episode is here


TOMORROW
Christina Aguilera