Segments are rated on a scale of 1-5 stars
ANDERSON COOPER 360
Arnold Schwarzenegger (DAH) on immigration
— Kenan is pretty funny here in his laid-back performance.
— Ugh, the return of Darrell’s weak Arnold Schwarzenegger impression.
— Rachel putting her Boston accent routine to good use here, even long after Jimmy Fallon’s departure.
— It’s almost as if SNL heard my criticisms of how bland and unfunny of a straight man Seth’s Anderson Cooper was in the previous Anderson Cooper 360 cold openings this season, because I’ve noticed that he’s making a lot more funny comments tonight.
— A subversion from how these Anderson Cooper 360 sketches usually end with Seth’s Cooper saying “Live from New York…”, as Rachel gets to be the one to deliver the LFNY this time, obviously because SNL was aware that tonight’s season finale was most likely Rachel’s final episode. She would indeed leave with Tina over the summer to do the show 30 Rock (Rachel was originally cast as the character Jenna), but, IIRC (though I’m not sure, so take this with a grain of salt), it wasn’t 100% confirmed yet as of this episode’s original airing if NBC was picking 30 Rock up (which is why I said SNL was aware that this was most likely Rachel’s final episode). Rachel leaving SNL for the show 30 Rock is sad in hindsight, knowing what would go on to happen to her in regards to that show (NBC would demand a re-casting of the role of Jenna, because they felt Rachel wasn’t “hot” enough to play the character).
STARS: **½
MONOLOGUE
host sings an American Idol-friendly version of “For Once In My Life”
— Could’ve done without Kevin Spacey’s little political jab at George W. Bush when making an analogy between the number of voters of American Idol and the last presidential election. Hey, I don’t like Bush either, but this little jab from Kevin felt way too out-of-place and shoehorned into this monologue, and took me out of the point he was trying to make about American Idol.
— Meh, not too crazy about this premise of Kevin enacting his ideal version of an American Idol performance. Feels like a waste of his comedic talents. Hopefully, he can still make this fun, though.
— Kevin’s executing this well, but I’m not laughing.
— Okay, I finally got a laugh just now, from how Kevin refers to Paula Abdul.
— The singing-on-the-floor bit is okay.
— I’m aware that Kevin deciding to finish his song “as a black person” is off-putting to some SNL fans nowadays. I’m not off-put or offended; my problem is that it’s not particularly funny.
STARS: **
TWO A-HOLES AT A CRIME SCENE
detective (host) interviews A-holes about a car theft they witnessed
— I like how this appears to be using the same set from the very first Two A-holes sketch, the one where they try to buy a Christmas tree.
— A huge laugh not only from the Two A-holes randomly requesting to have some of the cop’s donuts (which he doesn’t even have), but from the subsequent cutaway to Kevin’s deadpan, silent facial reaction to that request.
— Now Kevin is making absolutely hilarious deadpan, silent facial reactions straight into the camera.
— Kevin continues to be a fantastic straight man towards the Two A-holes’ hilarious lines; by far the best straight man these Two A-holes sketches have ever had.
— Ha, even Kevin’s execution of the very brief phone call was priceless.
STARS: ****½
OPRAH WINFREY’S LEGENDS BALL SPECIAL
black women plus John Travolta (DAH)
— As usual in sketches with Chris as a voice-over announcer, he has some funny lines here. I just now came to the sad realization this is the final episode we’ll be hearing Chris’ fantastic voice-over work on SNL. In my opinion, to this day in 2020, SNL has yet to find a cast member as strong of a sketch voice-over performer as Chris ever since his departure. Bill would pretty much take over Chris’ role as the go-to cast member for sketch voice-overs, but, as much as I love Bill, I’ve honestly never cared at all for his voice-over work on SNL. I like Cecily Strong’s voice-over work in more recent seasons, but not even she compares to Chris in that department.
— Kenan In A Dress alert.
— Finesse In A Dress alert. Good god.
— Jesus Freakin’ Christ, now we get another Kenan In A Dress alert…IN THE SAME SKETCH.
— Oh fucking no. Now we get the return of Darrell’s absolutely god-awful John Travolta impression. Okay, you know what, JUST END THIS SKETCH ALREADY.
— Oh, and between Ahnuld and now John Travolta, what’s with Darrell bringing back two of his worst celebrity impressions (besides Bush) in not only the same episode, but a season finale of all episodes? Given the fact that he was one of the cast members who online SNL fans at the time speculated over that summer would leave the show (then again, that was pretty much a tradition among online SNL fans during EVERY summer of Darrell’s later seasons, given how incredibly long he was on the show), Darrell doing two of his worst celebrity impressions would’ve been a poor way to end his long SNL tenure if this had indeed ended up being his final episode.
— I finally got a laugh just now, from Katie Holmes being billed as Katie Cruise-Hubbard.
— Funny Tom Cruise impression from Seth, without even saying a single word.
STARS: *½
CAROL!
at a restaurant, on-the-rebound (host) is captivated by crude Carol
— The fact that this is Horatio’s swan song and the fact that we had gotten a bit of a break from this character after her last appearance makes tonight’s installment a little more tolerable to me.
— I like Jason’s response to Kevin referring to Carol as an enchanting creature.
— It took Amy’s character that long to figure out what DILF stands for?
— Seth’s delivery as the waiter is pretty funny when he’s giving Carol her various bags of food in intervals.
— We get a PARTICULARLY energetic and exaggerated delivery of “iiiiiiiIIIIII’M CAROL!” from Horatio just now. I would say that’s a sign that Horatio is fully aware that this is the final Carol sketch and his final episode as a cast member, but I doubt it, as he actually gets fired over the summer due to budget cuts; it wasn’t his choice to leave. I remember an online SNL fan later saying sometime around 2010, in a negative manner, “If Horatio had his way, he’d still be on the show today.” Sadly, that’s very true. It would’ve taken us AGES to get rid of Horatio if it was up to him when he got to leave. A lot of us SNL fans should be very grateful for those 2006 budget cuts Lorne was forced to make, even if that meant we also lost the solid Chris Parnell in the process (though, honestly, I feel it was the right time for Chris to go, especially with Jason and Bill now in the cast).
— I got a laugh from Carol’s line about being a model for plus-sized coffins.
— Overall, for the final Carol sketch, I got some chuckles, though this sketch as a whole was still nothing great to me, and I’m a little disappointed that I never fully came around on the “So bad, it’s good”-ness that some people enjoy from these Carol sketches.
STARS: **½
TV FUNHOUSE
“Fun With Real Audio” by RBS- administration claims produce spit-takes
— A laugh from a congressman spitting out an entire bowl of soup onto Donald Rumsfeld.
— Larry King spitting out an entire lung when doing a spit-take while sipping an ice cream sundae had me freakin’ HOWLING. Hell, even just the randomness of Larry King drinking an ice cream sundae while conducting an interview on his show is hilarious in itself.
— I remember an online SNL fan back at this time suggesting that if this cartoon had appeared in the preceding episode, hosted by Julia Louis-Dreyfus, they could’ve somehow worked Julia’s memorable spit-take talk show host character from 1985 into this cartoon, given the spit-take theme of this cartoon.
STARS: ***
ANDY’S EXCUSE
ANS snows host with a Keyser Soze-worthy yarn to explain why he was late
— An interesting and out-of-the-ordinary backstage sketch.
— I love Kevin’s slow burn while sipping from a drink when he comes to the realization of what Andy had just pulled on him.
— An absolutely hilarious The Usual Suspects-esque turn with Kevin seeing all the visuals in the room that Andy made up his on-the-spot lie from.
— The “I Lied!” fax that Kevin receives at the end is very funny.
STARS: ****½
MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest & Timbaland [real] perform “Promiscuous”
WEEKEND UPDATE
excitable American Idol finalist Taylor Hicks (JAS) breaks into song
on TIF’s advice, AMP escapes from an alligator by pretending to be asleep
TIF extends her heretofore correct predictions regarding Britney Spears
Whitney Houston (MAR) leads a salute to TIF on her 180th show
— The final Tina Fey-anchored Weekend Update.
— When pointing out someone’s at the Update door, it sounds like Amy calls Tina “Betty”. At first, I thought to myself “Huh?”, until I remembered Elizabeth is Tina’s real first name (she gets the name Tina from her middle name, Stamantina), and Betty is commonly used as a nickname for the name Elizabeth.
— Great to see the return of Jason’s hilarious impression of Taylor Hicks.
— Like last time, lots of funny lines and singing outbursts from Jason’s Hicks.
— A rare Tina/Amy interaction piece on Update that actually works, as I really like the very random alligator bit. A good way for Tina/Amy Update interaction pieces to go out, considering this is our final one.
— Amy introduces tonight’s Women’s News segment from Tina by saying it’s the second-ever edition of it. Not even close. Tina actually did several editions of these Women’s News segments back in her earlier seasons, but I guess everyone at SNL, including Tina herself, only remembers the famous one about Britney Spears from Tina’s very first Update.
— Another big hint that this is Tina’s final Update, as we get a clip of the aforementioned Britney Spears-centered Women’s News segment from Tina’s very first Update.
— Funny to see how different Tina looked back in 2000 in the aforementioned clip, which 2006 Tina then gets in a self-deprecating jab at, by saying “I was really rockin’ that David Spade haircut.”
— I’m really enjoying Tina’s whole speech towards Britney Spears during tonight’s Women’s News segment. This is easily some of the better material Tina has performed on Update in a long time.
— Tina, towards Britney Spears: “In 10 years, you’ll be president.” Considering who actually does end up becoming president 10 years later, Tina’s joking comment about Britney Spears becoming president no longer seems as far-fetched as it would’ve back in 2006.
— Seems to be a bit of a fat baby theme in tonight’s Update.
— You can tell from looking at Tina right after she did her final Update joke that it was a significant moment to her.
— Amy mentions this is Tina’s 180th show at SNL (I’m assuming that’s including her pre-cast member years as a writer?), and brings out a celebration for Tina. This is actually a thinly-veiled way to give Tina a sendoff, but I’m assuming they’re not coming right out and saying this is her final episode, because, as I mentioned earlier, it wasn’t a 100% sure thing yet if the show 30 Rock was going to get picked up, and Tina probably wanted to keep SNL as an open option to stay on in case NBC decided to pass on 30 Rock. She probably saw what happened to Paula Pell, who left at the end of the preceding season (and got a big deal made about that during the goodnights) to work on an upcoming NBC sitcom, only for that sitcom to end up not even making it to air, leading Paula to come crawling back to SNL after about half a season.
— I love how in the middle of Maya-as-Whitney-Houston’s tribute song to Tina, Maya’s Whitney brings out who she incorrectly assumes are Tina’s favorite characters: Frondi, Vasquez Gomez-Vazquez, and Qrplt*xk.
— And thus concludes Tina’s…uh, rather varying tenure on Weekend Update. Honestly, I didn’t like being so negative about her in my reviews of these past few seasons, given how strong, consistently funny, witty, and refreshing she was in her first two seasons at the Update desk, and what a breath of fresh air her and Jimmy Fallon’s version of Update was from the Colin Quinn era it succeeded (though I ended up hating the Fey/Poehler era so much that my dissatisfaction with the Quinn era now feels absolutely trivial in hindsight). But, hey, I have to be open and honest about my opinions in these reviews, and I personally felt that Tina gradually went badly downhill as an Update anchor starting in season 28, culminating in the absolutely unwatchable final two seasons of her Update stint, the most dire that I feel Update had been since the rock-bottom 1980-1982 years of Update/SNL Newsbreak. I’m glad Tina at least went out on a bit of a high note, as she had some actual good moments in 3 of her final 4 Updates (the exception of those 4 Updates being the one from the Tom Hanks episode). And now, I say: BRING ON THE NEXT UPDATE ERA!
STARS: **½
THE FALCONER
quest to save Donald via time machine produces 14 copies of The Falconer
— This ends up being the final Falconer sketch.
— I love Donald squawking a dirty joke to The Falconer, which gets an offended reaction from The Falconer.
— Jason and Bill as Falconer clones in the first back-in-time scene is great.
— Oh, I am absolutely LOVING the absurd and ambitious escalation of this. This is becoming absolutely INSANE in the most perfect way.
— Hilarious how this sketch has gotten to the point where it has to resort to using female and black cast members to play Falconer clones, due to having used up so much of the cast.
— Various Falconers in unison throughout this sketch: “TO THE TIIIIIIME MACHIIIIINNNNNE-AH!”
— A very funny subversion with one scene being a completely unrelated bit involving Abraham Lincoln chopping wood, because the various Falconers went too far back in time.
— The visual of almost the entire cast dressed as the Falconer and speaking in unison is unforgettable.
— Overall, wow. An absolute masterpiece. And this was such a perfect way for The Falconer sketches to go out. SNL would actually attempt another Falconer sketch sometime after this, but it wouldn’t make it past dress rehearsal. The premise of that cut Falconer sketch was very meta, having something to do with Will’s Falconer character finding out that his life is a sketch on a comedy show. As much as tonight’s Falconer installment was such a perfect way to end this recurring sketch’s run, that cut sketch sounds like it would’ve also been a very fitting way to end The Falconer’s run.
— I only wish that 1) tonight’s Falconer sketch included Tina, so this would’ve been an ENTIRELY full-cast sketch (though it’s not a big deal that she’s not in it, as I guess you can still argue it’s a full-cast sketch in regards to regular sketch performers), and 2) it was placed as the final sketch of this season finale. Closing the season with a full-cast sketch of this nature would’ve been absolutely epic, and this already-classic sketch would’ve gone down as one of the best season-ending sketches in SNL history.
STARS: *****
ANDY WALKING
ANS belittles correct man-on-the-street quiz responses
— Another display of Andy’s Adam Sandler-esque ability to milk laughs out of incredibly stupid humor. I especially got a laugh from the “Are you McSure?” bit.
— I love the bit with SNL writer John Lutz as a passerby.
— Overall, this was fine in itself, but way too average for a season finale Digital Short. Considering the huge first year they had on SNL, you’d figure Lonely Island would go all out on their season-ending Digital Short.
STARS: ***
LEGENDS OF HISTORY
inventor of sarcasm (host) confuses English in 1100s
— Perfect casting of Kevin as this inventor of sarcasm.
— Oh, I absolutely LOVE the voice Bill is using.
— Believe it or not, this is the very first and only time in Chris’ entire SNL tenure where he has dressed in drag. An odd and fitting coincidence how this is occurring in what ends up being Chris’ final episode. You’d think this coincidence was intentional, as a way to scratch off the last thing on the list of things Chris never did during his SNL tenure (besides break character), but, much like Horatio, it wasn’t planned at the time for this to be Chris’ final episode. He was another casualty of the budget cuts Lorne was forced to make over the summer.
— Some good laughs from Kevin’s sarcastic remarks throughout this sketch.
— Hilarious reveal of Stonehenge having gotten built just because of a sarcastic thing Kevin told his men to do.
STARS: ***½
MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “Maneater”
I DO NOT AGREE WITH MANY OF THIS ADMINISTRATION’S POLICIES
Neil Young’s (host) new album contains unsubtle political commentary
— Sadly, this is the ONLY celebrity impression Kevin has done all night. A letdown compared to the wide array of spot-on and very funny celebrity impressions he memorably did in his first hosting stint. Not only that, but his Neil Young impression in this sketch isn’t even particularly good. I see what he’s going for, but I’ve seen much better Neil Young impressions.
— The laughs in this sketch are only mild AT BEST. This is no way to close a season finale.
— Overall, an extremely meh sketch. I once again argue that SNL should’ve closed out this season with that epic Falconer sketch.
STARS: **
GOODNIGHTS
IMMEDIATE POST-SHOW THOUGHTS
— An overall average season finale. There were a few REALLY strong points, but a number of average or weak pieces brought the episode down to just an okay level. Kind of a forgettable episode compared to Kevin Spacey’s phenomenal season 22 episode. Spacey himself, despite a disappointing monologue and a mediocre Neil Young impression, brought a lot of solid performances tonight, even if, again, this hosting stint of his does not hold a candle to his season 22 hosting stint.
MY PERSONAL CHOICE OF “BEST OF” MOMENTS FOR THIS EPISODE, REPRESENTED WITH SCREENCAPS
HOW THIS EPISODE STACKS UP AGAINST THE PRECEDING ONE (Julia Louis-Dreyfus)
a step down
MY PERSONAL CHOICE OF “BEST OF” MOMENTS FOR THIS ENTIRE SEASON, REPRESENTED WITH SCREENCAPS
HOW THIS OVERALL SEASON STACKS UP AGAINST THE PRECEDING SEASON (2004-05)
a big step up
My full set of screencaps for this episode is here
TOMORROW
Season 32 begins, with Dane Cook as host, a more streamlined cast size, and Amy Poehler being joined by a new co-anchor on Weekend Update