December 19, 2009 – James Franco / Muse (S35 E10)

Segments are rated on a scale of 1-5 stars

THE LAWRENCE WELK SHOW
Dooneese creeps out a Mexican singer (host)

— So now this usually-post-monologue sketch has “graduated” to the cold opening slot? At least we’re getting a non-political opening.
— A rare host appearance in the cold opening.
— Blah. The same-old, same-old Dooneese routine that only worked for me the first time. Nothing to really say about it here.
STARS: **


MONOLOGUE
host pulls acting gigs for the new year from a bin of career ideas

— I like the fake-out with James Franco mentioning the title of a movie he was recently in, which the audience gives their obligatory applause to, only for him to reveal the movie doesn’t even exist.
— James: “Unlike last year, I don’t have a movie to promote. But SNL doesn’t have an election this year, so we’re all gettin’ by with a little less.”
— An okay idea of James pulling career suggestions out of a bin.
— Ugh at the suggestion of James picking a town and having sex with every woman in it, a joke that hasn’t aged well.
— After reading a suggestion about James making this the best SNL Christmas show of all time, I chuckled at James responding “Not a chance!” At least SNL’s not getting anyone’s hopes up, given how this episode turns out (not very good, IIRC).
STARS: **½


WHAT UP WITH THAT?
Mike Tyson & Jack McBrayer [real] on holiday episode

— Unlike previous What Up With That installments, in which Will does his announcements while standing next to the backup singers (Jenny and Nasim), Will does his announcements tonight from a separate set, which would go on to be a regular thing for him and future What Up With That announcer Taran Killam in all subsequent installments of this sketch…or at least all subsequent installments I’ve seen. I have yet to see the recent SNL At Home edition of this sketch from 2020, so I don’t know who, if anyone, played the announcer in that one. Thanks in advance if anyone lets me know who it was.
— Holy hell, Mike Freakin’ Tyson!
— For some reason, the gold chain that Jason usually wears in these sketches is being held in his hand when he and Fred first pop up in tonight’s installment.
— Ah, now Jason is wearing the gold chain the second time he and Fred pop up. I wonder why he held it in his hand in his earlier appearance in this sketch.
— It’s always hilarious in these What Up With That sketches whenever Jason gradually slows down his dance when the music slows down while Kenan introduces the character played by that night’s SNL host.
— This sketch is feeling more and more routine each time it appears, but as always, it’s a lot of fun.
— I love Andy as a dancing John Stockton.
— Jason is going particularly wild with his dance moves tonight, which is, of course, a plus.
STARS: ****½


AFFECTIONATE FAMILY
girlfriend (ABE) warms to intimacy of (host) & rest of Vogelcheck family

— OH, GOD. Figures that SNL would follow one of the most fun recurring sketches of this era (What Up With That) with one of the most miserable recurring sketches from this era.
— For some reason, it feels kinda odd seeing Kenan participating in the usual man-on-man kissing in this recurring sketch.
— As always, this is fucking insufferable.
STARS: *


THE TIZZLE WIZZLE SHOW
kids program has host, jammies, knives, pills

— Spot-on spoof of typical pre-schooler shows that air on channels like Nick Jr.
— Hilarious dark turn with the sudden involvement of knives, pills, and a glow-in-the-dark murder spree, all being presented in an upbeat, kid-friendly manner.
— Perfect ending, and I love James’ emotional breakdown.
— Overall, short but sweet. A very strong and funny display of dark and disturbing humor.
STARS: ****½


THE MANUEL ORTIZ SHOW
Latin rhythm eclipses infidelity revelation

— The debut of a recurring sketch that I’ve never liked. Damn, between the Affectionate Family and now this (and even The Lawrence Welk Show, as Fred plays the title role of that), how many bad Fred Armisen-starring recurring sketches can one episode feature?
— Only a minute into this sketch, and SNL has already run the “every guest’s entrance and exit features everybody dancing, to the exact same song each time” gag into the fucking ground.
— Something about the way Kenan looks in his walk-on is actually making me laugh, which is more than I can say for the rest of this sketch.
— Ugh, these one-joke dance routines are so increasingly unbearable.
STARS: *½


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “Uprising”


WEEKEND UPDATE
Jersey Shore’s Snooki (BOM) & The Situation (BIH) are cartoonish Italians

unprepared Garth (FRA) & Kat (KRW) make up holiday songs on the spot

— The debut of Bobby’s memorable Snooki impression.
— Despite being the cliched brash-guy-plays-a-woman trope, and despite the material being thin at some points, Bobby, in typical Bobby Moynihan fashion, is making this role a lot of fun.
— Funny walk-on from Bill as The Situation.
— OH. FUCKING. NO. NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! In tonight’s night of debuts, we get the debut of one of THE absolute nadirs not only of this SNL era, but of SNL history: fucking Garth and Kat. (*groan to end all groans*) And I had to open my mouth earlier in this review when I asked “how many bad Fred Armisen-starring recurring sketches can one episode feature?”
— Such self-indulgent bullshit with Fred and Kristen, the designated stars of this season, being given free rein to waste so much airtime with this painfully unfunny improv game routine that’s just an excuse for them to crack each other up on the air. Save this shit for behind the scenes.
STARS: **½


FRAT PLEDGE
mentally-slow fraternity brothers haze pledge (ANS) to learn basic facts

— For some reason, I’m cracking up at the horror music playing at the beginning of this sketch, during the fratboys’ hazing of Andy.
— Feels kinda like they’re revealing the main joke too early, but it’s still making me laugh.
— I love Jason’s performance as a loud, angry, deep-voiced fratboy, another example of Jason perfectly pulling off a Will Ferrell-esque role.
— When this originally aired, I remember it being pointed out by some online SNL fans that James seemed to be drooling throughout this sketch. That’s supported by the fact that, when James claps his hands a single time at one point, Andy has an awkward facial reaction, then, in an ad-lib, wipes something off of the side of his face while smirking out of character. James’ drool apparently got on Andy’s face when James clapped. I’m completely lost on how or why any of this happened. Does James have some kind of drooling disorder or something?
STARS: ***


VINCENT PRICE’S CHRISTMAS SPECIAL
James Dean (host) visits Vincent Price’s (BIH) 1954 Christmas Special

Marilyn Monroe (ABE) quickly shills for Asbestos

— The usual opening gag with Bill’s Vincent Price being the victim of a special effects failure came off kinda half-assed tonight.
— Kristen reprises her Katharine Hepburn impression from the second installment of this sketch, way back in season 31. Her Hepburn is being utilized much more in tonight’s installment, given that the previous installment her Hepburn appeared in was back when SNL was still experimenting with the format of these Vincent Price sketches and opted to have each guest in that installment make a separate appearance and then immediately leave.
— Unlike in the previous appearances Fred’s Liberace made in these Vincent Price sketches, the gay jokes involving him aren’t working much for me in tonight’s installment, but I always absolutely love Bill-as-Price’s reactions to him.
— They repeat a gag from the very first installment of this sketch, where the commercial break that Bill’s Price throws to ends up being very short, which he angrily questions afterwards.
— I got a big laugh from Kristen’s Hepburn cracking the neck of the raccoon biting her.
— The ending jump scare with a rabies-infested Kristen suddenly popping up in front of the screen while screaming was awfully similar to the ending of the Game Time With Randy And Greg sketch earlier this season.
— This overall sketch was good, but I sadly didn’t find it to be as strong as usual.
STARS: ***½


TREE LOVER
(host) is emotionally attached to evergreens on his Christmas tree lot

— I’m iffy on this premise of James engaging in increasingly detailed conversations with his Christmas trees, though there is something strangely kinda endearing about it. Maybe I’d like this sketch more if it was performed by a host far more adept at pulling off oddball roles, like, say, John Malkovich, Christopher Walken, or Steve Buscemi.
— I remember an online SNL fan back at this time in 2009 saying this sketch had a very season 6 feel. Not sure if I agree with that or not nowadays.
— Kinda tired of all the reaction shots of the straight man characters throughout this sketch whenever James is talking to a Christmas tree. Maybe I wouldn’t mind it if this wasn’t an SNL era that relied too heavily on cutting to people’s silent reaction shots whenever someone is doing something weird.
— Don’t care for the gag at the end with a tree actually talking back to James.
STARS: **


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “Starlight”


OFFICE CHRISTMAS PRESENTS
businessmen Carl, Jerry, (host) choose dildos for office Christmas gifts

— The third and final appearance of Will and Bill’s Carl and Jerry characters, a.k.a. the Fart Face guys.
— Is James supposed to be playing the same character Alec Baldwin previously played in the second installment of this sketch? Both James and Alec’s characters are named Troy, and both hosts wear the same wig.
— The visual of that ridiculous tiny toupee on Will’s forehead always cracks me up in these sketches.
— I always love Will’s delivery of “Carol, hold my caaaallllls!” in these sketches.
— All the dildo talk is very dumb, but is having me laughing out loud due to the solid execution and delivery. While this, to me, still doesn’t compare to the original Fart Face sketch these characters appeared in, it’s still better than their appearance from the preceding season’s Alec Baldwin episode.
— What the hell happened to the camera all of a sudden? While James is angrily saying “What a freakin’ fart face!”, the camera accidentally cuts to a close-up of a silent Bill instead of James, then the screen malfunctions and turns green, then turns gray, then cuts to a random close-up of a silent Will. Very odd.
— Fred has appeared in almost EVERY SINGLE SKETCH tonight.
— What was with the very abrupt ending? Was that even an ending??? This sketch just randomly faded to black after Will, Bill, and James yelled a whole bunch of stuff at Fred.
STARS: ****


MARK WAHLBERG TALKS TO CHRISTMAS ANIMALS
Mark Wahlberg (ANS) talks to a sheep, a partridge, a snowman, Rudolph

— Adding to my confusion over how abruptly the preceding Office Christmas Presents sketch faded to black, it’s immediately followed by this Mark Wahlberg sketch opening with a taped(?) Don Pardo voice-over saying “This has been Mark Wahlberg Talks to Christmas Animals”, as if the sketch is ending instead of beginning. What the hell is going ON?!? Tonight’s episode has gotten really sloppy these last two sketches.
— The first installment of this sketch is a classic, but, yeah, not sure we needed a follow-up. This doesn’t seem like that type of thing that’ll work as a recurring sketch.
— Andy’s execution is still solid, like it was in the first installment of this sketch, but the material is leaving a little to be desired.
— Hmm, all of a sudden, Andy now seems to be rushing through this. He’s also blatantly staring at the cue cards this entire sketch, which he didn’t (noticeably) do in the first installment.
— The ending almost got cut off, and they seemed to be in a big hurry to fade to the SNL bumper photo of James Franco. Yeah, they definitely rushed through this sketch. The show must be running long. I wonder if this is also the reason why the preceding Office Christmas Presents sketch ended so abruptly. I also wonder if this is why Andy blatantly stared at the cue cards all throughout this Walhberg sketch, as perhaps a lot of lines in this sketch were removed at LITERALLY the very last minute so they could squeeze this sketch in.
STARS: **½


GOODNIGHTS


IMMEDIATE POST-SHOW THOUGHTS
— A pretty meh Christmas episode, despite some good things. Further hurting this episode was the fact that we got quite a number of wretched recurring material (The Lawrence Welk Show, Affectionate Family, The Manuel Ortiz Show, Garth and Kat), all of which just so happened to star Fred Armisen and/or Kristen Wiig.


MY PERSONAL CHOICE OF “BEST OF” MOMENTS FOR THIS EPISODE, REPRESENTED WITH SCREENCAPS


RATED SEGMENTS RANKED FROM BEST TO WORST
The Tizzle Wizzle Show
What Up With That?
Office Christmas Presents
Vincent Price’s Christmas Special
Frat Pledge
Mark Wahlberg Talks To Christmas Animals
Monologue
Weekend Update
Tree Lover
The Lawrence Welk Show
The Manuel Ortiz Show
Affectionate Family


HOW THIS EPISODE STACKS UP AGAINST THE PRECEDING ONE (Taylor Lautner)
a very slight step up


My full set of screencaps for this episode is here


TOMORROW
We enter a new decade. Charles Barkley hosts the first SNL of the 2010s.

December 12, 2009 – Taylor Lautner / Bon Jovi (S35 E9)

Segments are rated on a scale of 1-5 stars

ADULTERERS PRESS CONFERENCE
Mark Sanford (JAS) & other unfaithful officials sidelined by Tiger Woods

— A fairly funny idea of officials being desperate to bring up their own sex scandals while the nation is obsessed with Tiger Woods’ sex scandal.
— I’m getting tired of Will-as-John-Edwards’ constant love child mentions in this cold opening.
— Overall, some laughs, but this cold opening was nothing too great as a whole.
STARS: **½


MONOLOGUE
host belatedly stands up to Kanye West in Video Music Awards reenactment

— Funny callback to Kenan as Reba McEntire.
— Do we really need a monologue focused around the then-overexposed Kanye West/Taylor Swift VMAs incident, months after it happened? Not to mention how Taylor Swift herself took the high road in her SNL episode earlier this season by relegating the obligatory VMAs reference to a small bit towards the end of the monologue.
Two monologues in the past three episodes to feature the host doing backflips? Has this become a requirement for ALL male hosts at this point?
— Impressive moves from Taylor Lautner here, though this lacks the excitement that Joseph Gordon-Levitt’s moves had in his monologue.
— Ha, I like how, after TWICE botching his attempt to kick the Kanye West mannequin’s head off, Taylor ad-libs by straight-up punching the mannequin’s head off instead. Nice save.
STARS: **½


ROSE BOWL PROMO
(host) can’t relax during pre-taping of Rose Bowl player introductions

— Very fast costume change for Kenan, considering he had less than a minute to do a costume change between his Reba appearance towards the very end of the monologue and his appearance as a football player in this sketch, which is appearing immediately after the monologue, with no break in between.
— Speaking of Kenan, I’ve been noticing around this time that he’s been losing weight. It’s particularly noticeable in this sketch. His gradual weight loss would continue both this and the following season, only for him to eventually gain all the weight back sometime after 2010. From what VERY little I’ve seen of Kenan in 2019 and our current year, 2020 (as I’ve mentioned in some previous reviews, I’ve been on a still-ongoing hiatus from watching new SNL episodes, ever since December 2018), it seems like he’s lost more weight than ever. I’ve never seen him so thin.
— A little chuckle when Taylor first makes dumb faces at the camera during his intro taping, before you realize this is going to be the ONLY main joke in this four-minute sketch.
— Lately, Bill seems to be trying to make “D’ohhhhhh, boyyyyyy” his catchphrase, as he said it in both the Secret Word sketch from two episodes prior and now this sketch. That “D’ohhhhhh, boyyyyyy” groan of his also matches my fatigue over this tiring, badly-written sketch.
— Ha, I actually got a big laugh from Taylor’s bad dancing and singing during the most recent take, as stupid as it was. The way his voice went in an upwards pitch at the end of his stretched-out, goofy-voiced utterance of his name Phil (“phiiiiiiIIIIILLL!”) made me lose it, and I almost hate myself for laughing so hard at something THAT dumb.
— Andy steals this sketch with his walk-on at the end, easily the funniest part of this poor sketch.
STARS: *½


SURPRISE
imminent pregnancy announcement puts surprise-loving Sue through the roof

— Oh, god. If you’re familiar with my reviews, you’ll know my reaction to seeing Surprise Sue appear.
— At least it’s been over a year since this character’s last appearance. I didn’t realize until very recently that Sue only appears a handful of times during Kristen’s SNL tenure. She only appears once per season from seasons 33-35, completely skips season 36 (I think Kristen announced around that time that she retired the character, because she was sick of playing her), and then makes a return once in season 37, Kristen’s final season. After that, Sue makes one more appearance years later in a 2016 episode that Kristen hosts. It feels like this character appeared a lot more often and more frequently than that, but perhaps that’s me just getting her mixed together with certain other Wiig recurring characters who I don’t like (a lot of those characters run together in my mind).
— Two-and-a-half minutes into this, and I can’t find anything to say about the content of it. This sketch is featuring the same old, same old stuff that didn’t even work all that much for me in this character’s first sketch, yet has STILL suffered diminishing returns for me in the follow-up installments.
— Sue trying to keep herself from revealing the surprise by shoving pieces of a gingerbread house into her mouth and climbing up a chimney feels like a downgrade from her trying to keep quiet by smashing a bottle over her head and jumping out the window in prior installments of this sketch, but at least they tried something a little different this time, unlike the second installment of this sketch, which copied too many gags from the first installment.
— It’s worth noting that this ends up being Kristen’s ONLY appearance all night. Very surprising, given how very heavily SNL has been typically relying on her both the preceding season and this one (much to the chagrin of some online SNL fans at the time). I remember an online SNL fan back at this time had a theory that the reason for SNL going so light on Kristen in this episode may have been because the Gilly Christmas special was going to air a few days afterwards, which obviously features tons of airtime for Kristen.
STARS: *½


PGA TOUR
PGA Tour commissioner Tim Finchem (JAS) downplays Tiger Woods’ hiatus

— Some good laughs from Jason very unconvincingly attempting to assure us that the PGA Tour is going to be fine without Tiger Woods, and how it has plenty of other golfing superstars.
— I like Jason desperately taking a drink from a flask of liquor.
— Pretty funny walk-on from Bobby removing sponsor logos in the background while Jason is still going on to the camera about how “fine” the PGA Tour is going to be.
STARS: ***½


SHOW CHOIR
middle schooler (ANS) heckles Christmas program of classmates’ show choir

— Will’s role reminds me of the prison warden role he played in the 50’s Ent sketch (in which Will memorably kept yelling “Shut the eff up!” to the off-camera prisoners booing the onstage performers) from the Ashton Kutcher episode all the way back in season 28, Will’s very first season.
— Not caring for this sketch at all. Not even Will is doing anything for me. His role in this sketch pales badly in comparison to his role in the aforementioned 50’s Ent sketch.
— Ha, yet another Andy Samberg walk-on that salvages a bad sketch. He’s playing this particular obnoxious role to absolute perfection.
— Nice singing voice from Kenan during the part where the stage show actually gets legitimately good all of a sudden.
— Bah, a lame ending.
STARS: *½


PGA TOUR
Tim Finchem (JAS) puts on a brave face amidst desperate PGA Tour changes

— Absolutely hilarious how the only sponsors the PGA Tour can now get are things such as Madoff Investment Group and the movie Old Dogs.
— Jason is perfectly selling his character’s increasing desperation and diminishing emotional state.
— A lot of funny new golf rules that Jason lists off.
— In hindsight, a reminder that Jersey Shore was the new hot show at the time, which also serves as a reminder that the debut of Bobby’s Snooki impression (which we’ll be seeing quite a lot both this and the following season during Jersey Shore’s peak of popularity) is right around the corner.
— I love Jason suddenly having second thoughts when realizing the PGA Tour’s new addition of sexy female caddies would be a bad idea.
STARS: ****


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “Superman Tonight”


WEEKEND UPDATE
Tiger Woods mistress #15 (NAP) wrongly thinks relationship was special

Native American stand-up Billy Smith’s indigenous punchlines fall flat

— Something about Seth’s voice sounds a little odd and slower tonight. Is this another Update in which he has a fairly hoarse throat?
— Nothing much to say about Nasim’s commentary at all. Her occasional sayings of “Oh, fu-huuurrr suuurrre” feels like the only real humor, and even that’s being run into the ground here.
— Wow, Fred’s Billy Smith character, appearing for the first time since way back in 2004, believe it or not. Just to put into perspective how VERY long it’s been, the last Weekend Update commentary Billy Smith did prior to this was during the Fallon/Fey era of Update. (Billy Smith’s actual last appearance prior to tonight was a very brief, silent walk-on in Liam Neeson’s season 30 monologue, which is still a very long time ago from tonight’s episode.)
— Given how badly downhill Fred has been going this season, it’s kinda nice to see the return of an actual funny character from Fred’s actual good years on SNL. Back in those days, he was a master at pulling off Andy Kaufman-esque anti-comedy that this Billy Smith character relies on.
— Sadly, Fred doesn’t even seem to be able to play this character the way he used to. In tonight’s appearance, Fred is mugging up a fucking STORM at the end of each punchline. He never went THIS over-the-top in this character’s previous appearances. It’s completely ruining the character for me, and he’s making the mugging the joke rather than the obscure Native American terms that the punchlines end with. (*sigh*) Just another sign of how bad Fred has gotten this season (and how worse he would continue to get after this).
— Now Fred’s milking the “What else? What else?” gag too much.
— Seth can be heard laughing off-camera at the Billy Smith commentary as loudly as the audience, and certainly louder than me.
— Boy, this Billy Smith commentary is insufferable. Please end this already.
— Hey, Seth? We didn’t need you to explain the punchline of your Amish/“weaving” joke. We got the joke on our own, thank you. As I always say, a comedian explaining their own punchline is one of the biggest comedy sins.
— Overall, the second consecutive subpar Update.
STARS: **


LAB PARTNERS
in science class, tweens (host) & (JES) debate merits of Edward vs. Jacob

— Ugh at the reveal of Taylor in drag, early on in this sketch. I’m already starting to sour on this sketch.
— Unlike the Firelight short from the Taylor Swift-hosted episode earlier this season, which was still able to appeal to me as someone who’s never seen a Twilight movie, this Twilight-centric sketch is going way over my head, can’t hold my interest, and seems like it’s meant to just pander to young Twilight fangirls who may be watching. I also don’t like how this feels like a lame attempt at the “Celebrity makes fun of themselves while playing someone else” trope (which SNL did to better effect even just two episodes prior with Dave Matthews in the Mellow Show sketch).
— This sketch is DEATH so far.
— I finally got an actual laugh, from the cutaway to Bobby’s dumbfounded facial reaction. Good ol’ Bobby.
— Oh, no. Jenny makes a bad gaffe right now (her second bad gaffe of the season, and I don’t need to say what her first one was), where she accidentally reads Bill’s line off of the cue card (“Hey, what have I told you, Marianna?”) when Taylor’s character is making out with a book. You can tell Jenny instantly realizes her mistake and is rather embarrassed by it. To Jenny’s credit, she at least didn’t say the line very loudly, and thus, I’m sure a lot of viewers don’t notice it when watching this sketch. However, this gaffe is still a sign of how green Jenny is as a live sketch performer. Reruns hide this gaffe by replacing the shot of Jenny reading the wrong line off the cue card with a random close-up of Bobby just looking on while doing and saying nothing.
— A very awkward and empty ending.
STARS: *½


PGA TOUR
drunk Tim Finchem (JAS) is angry & distraught over future of his sport

— These PGA Tour bits have been the ONLY things working for me in tonight’s episode so far.
— I love the continued downfall of Jason’s character. We also get a funny visual of a tie wrapped around his head.
— Very funny how one of new sponsors is the letter Q.
— Hmm, this is starting to run out of steam a little. This third PGA Tour ad is starting to come off like this runner has been stretched a little too thin, though as usual, Jason is selling it as best as he can.
STARS: ***


ETERNAL SPARK OF LOVE
(KET) slides in with soulful commentary on young lovers (host) & (ABE)

— Interesting structure to this sketch.
— I like how Kenan’s soulful interjections are now taking a different turn when uncomfortable awkwardness starts happening in Taylor and Abby’s romantic encounter.
— Very funny part with Kenan’s character falling off of the moving platform and then yelling at the crew member responsible.
— This sketch continues Kenan’s growth arc this season, as he is a hoot in this sketch. I particularly love him very briefly popping his head into the screen just to yell an angry, quick “NO!” at the camera, in reaction to something embarrassing Taylor revealed about himself.
STARS: ****


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “When We Were Beautiful”


DOORBELLS AND MORE
Tina Tina Chanuse (JES) voices custom doorbells to suit all needs

— Bobby has the ability to even make his sarcastic utterance of “Pff! Nice doorbell!” come off very funny.
— Wow, the usually-underused Jenny Slate in ANOTHER big role tonight. This, combined with the fact that the usually-dominant Kristen Wiig has made only one appearance all night, along with the fact that Abby and Nasim have been making a fairly large amount of appearances as well, makes me feel like I’m watching an alternate universe episode from this SNL era.
— I have very mixed feelings on the humor of Jenny’s various doorbells, but I think I’m leaning closer to the “Don’t care much for it” side.
— Bobby continues to get a lot of humor out of the littlest things, as I love his sideways thumbs-up before he exits.
— It’s getting tiring hearing all of these comedic doorbell voice-overs back to back. I’m now realizing that some of these doorbell voice-overs would actually make me laugh if I heard them as an isolated, individual gag rather than hearing all of them one after another.
— Jenny’s reaction to Taylor walking out on her was fairly funny.
— When this episode originally aired, I remember feeling that Jenny had finally “made it”, and I considered this to be her breakout night. However, the reception a lot of online SNL fans at the time had to Jenny’s showing in this episode was very negative, due to 1) the poor Lab Partners sketch Jenny co-starred in, 2) Jenny’s aforementioned bad gaffe in said Lab Partners sketch where she mistakenly read Bill’s line off the cue card, and 3) this polarizing Doorbell sketch. I even remember that, right after this episode originally aired, one online SNL fan made a snarky post that stated “Message from the future: Jenny Slate only lasted one season on SNL.”
STARS: **


IN MEMORIAM
a photo of Heino Ripp marks his passing


GOODNIGHTS


IMMEDIATE POST-SHOW THOUGHTS
— Not a good episode AT ALL. Mediocrity dominated the night, and the overall episode had a completely forgettable, “nothing” feel. Aside from a (very) few highlights, this episode was a total write-off.


MY PERSONAL CHOICE OF “BEST OF” MOMENTS FOR THIS EPISODE, REPRESENTED WITH SCREENCAPS


RATED SEGMENTS RANKED FROM BEST TO WORST
Eternal Spark Of Love
PGA Tour 2
PGA Tour 1
PGA Tour 3
Adulterers Press Conference
Monologue
Doorbells And More
Weekend Update
Rose Bowl Promo
Show Choir
Surprise
Lab Partners


HOW THIS EPISODE STACKS UP AGAINST THE PRECEDING ONE (Blake Lively)
a big step down


My full set of screencaps for this episode is here


TOMORROW
The 2000s come to an end. James Franco hosts the final episode of the decade.

December 5, 2009 – Blake Lively / Rihanna (S35 E8)

Segments are rated on a scale of 1-5 stars

WHITE HOUSE CRASHERS
Tareq (BOM) & Michaele (KRW) Salahi photobomb Barack Obama (FRA) speech

— A topical spoof of the infamous White House crashers.
— I like Bill coming on as secret service agent and initially acting sternly towards the crashers, then backing off from them with an “Oh, it’s okay” gesture.
— Funny background antics all throughout this.
— Hilarious random inclusion of Jason’s Joe Biden as a friend of the crashers.
— Pretty funny when the crashers and secret service agents actually ask Fred’s President Obama to stop his speech and take a photo of them, which he does hesitantly.
STARS: ***½


MONOLOGUE
Swedish Chef (ANS) & other Muppets join host onstage for Christmas carol

— A very random excuse for a reprisal of the cast’s Muppets impressions, but I guess this is fun enough.
— Jason’s Fozzie voice sounds even more spot-on than it did in the Muppet Bus sketch from the preceding season.
— Jenny (in her only appearance of the night) takes over the Janice role last played by Michaela Watkins, who herself took over the role from Maya Rudolph. Kinda like the Hoda Kotb role, there almost seems to be a curse with the Janice role, as each individual cast member who has played Janice in this SNL era would end up no longer being on the show by the time SNL does the next Muppets sketch (though unlike Michaela and Jenny, Maya left on her own and wasn’t fired).
— A charming “Hark The Herald Angels Sing” performance from the Muppets.
STARS: ***


CARTER N’ SONS BBQ
Rerun from 11/7/09


VAGISIL SUPERSTARS OF BOWLING TOURNAMENT 1989
Pete Twinkle & Greg Stink cover 1989 ladies’ bowling tournament

— This sketch has officially become recurring.
— I’m getting a little tired of this era’s habit of always following up a “You’re watching (insert channel here)” station ID at the beginning of sketches by inserting a comedic one-liner about people who watch said channel (e.g. “You’re watching (insert channel here), which means you’re asleep and rolled over on the couch.”) Seems to occur about once an episode at this point of SNL’s run.
— Like last time, there’s a lot of fun and fantastic interplay between Jason and Will’s character, and the idiocy from Will’s character is always a hoot.
— Jason: “Vagisil – I scream, you scream, we all scream for vagina cream! (*long pause while the audience laughs*) Vagisiiiiil!”
— I recall hearing that one of the fake audience members in the background is Blake Lively’s real-life father (the man to Blake’s left in the background of the below screencap).

If that is indeed her father, that explains why her character singles him out by aggressively grabbing him briefly while she’s celebrating a strike at one point. I can also see a facial resemblance between the two of them.
STARS: ****


THE SITUATION ROOM WITH WOLF BLITZER
Elin Nordegren (host) abuses untrue Tiger Woods (KET)

— The debut of Jason’s Wolf Blitzer impression.
— Back when this originally aired, I remember not being happy by SNL’s decision to cast Kenan in the Tiger Woods role, as I felt back then that Fred would’ve been far more fitting in the role. All these years later, I now thank God SNL didn’t cast Fred in this role.
— I got a laugh from how Kenan’s Tiger Woods, after another brutal injury from his wife, begins his latest press conference by saying a lighthearted “Talk about a case of the Mondays!”
— Jason’s occasional mumbling as Wolf Blitzer is increasingly hilarious.
— An okay escalation to the scenes with Tiger Woods and his wife.
— I love the beast-like facial expression Blake makes when running after Kenan’s Tiger at the end of the sketch (screencap below).

STARS: ***


SHY RONNIE
musical guest’s duet with Shy Ronnie (ANS) is stymied by his mumbling

— Seemingly one of the most popular music video Digital Shorts in Lonely Island’s repertoire.
— Rihanna’s parts of the song are catchy.
— As someone who, all of his life, has been described as very shy and a low talker, I can really relate to Andy’s character.
— I love Shy Ronnie’s occasional “Ha-HAAAA!”s throughout this, especially after the “He pissed himself” part.
— Great turn with Andy’s Shy Ronnie suddenly breaking out into an audible hardcore rap when Rihanna has left, only to go back to his typical inaudbile shy mumbling when Rihanna briefly returns.
STARS: ****½


GOSSIP GIRL: STATEN ISLAND
less-glamorous borough has its share of drama

— Bill is always perfect at playing Italian wiseguys.
— The stereotypical New York-y wiseguy humor in this sketch in general feels bland, but the performances are pretty fun.
STARS: **½


KICKSPIT UNDERGROUND ROCK FESTIVAL
Under-Underground rock festival subjects attendees to hazards

— The debut of these Kickspit Underground pieces.
— A version of this got cut after the dress rehearsal of the infamous January Jones episode earlier this season, with January in Nasim’s role. Reportedly, that version had a different format from the one airing in tonight’s episode. Not sure if it was live or if it was pre-taped like tonight’s version.
— So many hilarious fake band names and extremely random events; way too many to single out the funniest, as they’re all slaying me. This is made even funnier by the rapid-fire pacing.
— Ass Dan!
— Excellent performances from Jason and Nasim. I can’t even imagine how awful January Jones must’ve been when trying to pull off this type of character in her cut-after-dress version of this (assuming her character was written to be like Nasim and Jason’s character’s in the aired version I’m currently reviewing).
— There’s the first instance of what would go on to be a running joke in these Kickspit pieces, with Ass Dan turning out to be dead.
STARS: ****½


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “Russian Roulette”


WEEKEND UPDATE
gibberish helps make Bill Cosby’s (KET) hip-hop album socially-conscious

recently fired from a movie, Brittany Murphy (ABE) thinks she’s doing SNL

— WTF? Bill Cosby put out a hip-hop album in real-life at this time? How was I never aware of this ridiculousness?
— Kenan’s Cosby impression is always solid. However, given the fact that a certain other guest commentary coming up later in this Update would end up being the victim of very unfortunate timing, it casts a dark shadow over this Cosby commentary in hindsight as well, given what would happen in regards to Cosby’s own future.
— After his Charlie Brown joke, Seth’s ad-lib, “Charlie Brown cannot catch a break. First, that football getting pulled away, and then, uh….AIDS” was very Norm Macdonald-esque, especially the “and, then, uh”, the silent pause afterwards, and then the way he said AIDS in a very deadpan manner while staring down the camera.
— OH. NO. Here comes the aforementioned infamous commentary in this Update: Abby as a loopy, out-of-it Brittany Murphy, in what ends up being just two weeks before the real Brittany Murphy would unexpectedly die. One of the most unfortunate cases of timing in SNL history. Between the Cosby commentary earlier and now this, oof. Tonight’s choices for guest commentators have aged horribly.
— When this originally aired, Abby’s Brittany Murphy impression cracked me up, and I was happy to see Abby get some much-needed airtime, but man, this is now IMPOSSIBLE for me to watch and laugh at in retrospect. All the troubled loopiness in Abby’s portrayal, intended for comedic value, just comes off really sad now.
— Needless to say, the Brittany Murphy commentary would later get removed from all reruns. Can’t remember what, if anything, it was replaced with in the 90-minute NBC rerun. Perhaps a re-airing of a pre-taped ad from another episode?
— I didn’t get the “gay dude’s refrigerator magnet” punchline to Seth’s joke about where you can find a photo of Marilyn Monroe smoking marijuana.
STARS: **½


SKIRT SHOPPING
Virginiaca supports her stepdaughter (host) in an upscale clothes shop

— OH, GOD. And I had (mercifully) completely forgotten about this wretched Virginiaca character, given the fact that her last appearance was all the way back in season 33. Thankfully, tonight’s sketch ends up being her final appearance.
— And, of course, we have our 10,000th different white stepdaughter of Virginiaca’s, despite how we’re always told Virginiaca is married to the same man in every sketch.
— Not caring much for Blake’s attempt at an urban voice. It sounds too forced, especially compared to how natural Jaime Pressly and Scarlett Johansson sounded doing an urban voice in earlier installments of this sketch. At least this isn’t as cringey as seeing Ellen Page attempt a character like this.
— As usual, not a single laugh from me during this sketch. Also as usual, my only reaction is lots of groaning and cringing at all the awful attempts at urban humor and drag humor.
STARS: *


UPS
Andy Azula (BIH) ensures UPS will be identified with a man in a lady wig

— I vaguely remember the real UPS commercials this is spoofing. I remember finding this to be such a spot-on and funny spoof back when it originally aired.
— Solid performance from Bill, even if the material itself is merely okay.
STARS: ***


LATE NIGHT WITH CHRIS HANSEN
celebs get ambushed a la pedophiles

— Interesting how the Weekend Update-only Seth Meyers does the voice-over in the opening “You’re watching MSNBC” gag. Oh, and the fact that this “You’re watching MSNBC” gag is YET ANOTHER example of a station ID inserting a comedic one-liner about people who watch the channel just further proves a point I made earlier in this review about how this SNL era overuses this gag. Twice in the same night, SNL?!?
— Despite my well-documented fatigue towards the talk show sketch format, the idea of a Chris Hansen-hosted talk show being done in the style of To Catch A Predator is fun.
— Jason’s Philip Seymour Hoffman impression is always good to see.
— Amusing seeing Andy as Keanu Reeves.
— Funny visual of Bill’s Chris Hansen hiding behind his desk in a silly-looking crouching position.
— I love Andy-as-Keanu’s delivery of “What’s going ON?”
STARS: ***


UPS
Andy Azula (BIH) feels in command with his UPS whiteboard & lady wig

— A follow-up, making fun of how insanely frequently the real UPS ads were aired around this time.
— Again, like the first ad, I commend Bill’s solid execution of average material.
— Ah, we actually get funny material, with the ending gag involving Bill smugly adding a stick figure erection on the stick figure drawing of his body.
STARS: ***½


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest & Young Jeezy [real] perform “Hard”


POTATO CHIP THIEF
at NASA, astronaut candidate (JAS) admits stealing (WLF)’s potato chip

— Oh, here comes a sketch that’s rightfully beloved by many SNL fans, and is rightfully considered one of the biggest highlights of this otherwise not-very-well-liked season.
— Will’s (and Blake’s) pronunciation of “potato chips” is legendary.
— Fantastic voice and delivery from Jason, coming off like a prototype to his also-well-loved Maine Justice character from later in his SNL tenure. On a similar note, Will’s character in this Potato Chip Thief sketch seems kinda like it could be the same character he previously played in the Dr. Uncle Jimmy’s Smokehouse & Outpatient Surgical Facility sketch, as he has a similar look and voice.
— I love the finger dance Jason does with his hand when reaching for a potato chip in the bowl.
— Another hilarious little detail, with Jason actually dusting himself off when he sees that Will’s about to return right after Jason has eaten one of the potato chips.
— A fantastic insane and intense turn this sketch suddenly takes when Jason is accused of being a potato chip thief.
— When Will is angrily telling Jason things he will never do now that he’s been exposed as a potato chip thief, I love how one of things an off-camera Jason yells is “Take it back!”
— Oh, hell yeah! Now we’re getting a dose of Will’s classic purple-faced screaming routine, this time complete with him crouching on top of a desk.
— The commitment to this sketch is incredible, and the fact that none of the performers are breaking is adding to the amazing execution of this.
— I love Jason’s teary, emotional breakdown when finally admitting he took the chip.
— Blake, who’s giving a great supporting performance in her own right, delivers her “You don’t take people’s potatuh chiiiips” line perfectly.
— And there’s the moment that, for me, propels this already-classic sketch further into a classic: Jason hawking back up the potato chip he ate and spitting it into Will’s hand.
— Seeing the aforementioned Jason-spitting-into-Will’s-hand part reminds me that the dress rehearsal version of this sketch would later be aired in reruns of this episode. (I wonder if the reason was to fill in the extra time left over from the removal of the Brittany Murphy commentary from Weekend Update.) The biggest differences I can remember in the dress rehearsal version are that 1) when Jason’s about to hawk up the potato chip, he stretches out the bit where he repeatedly looks back and forth between Will’s open hand and Will’s face a lot longer and more exaggeratedly than he did in the live version, and 2) unlike the live version in which all the performers keep a perfect straight face for the entire sketch, Blake helplessly cracks up when Jason spits up the potato chip into Will’s hand.
— Jason: “Well…this certainly did not end the way I had imagined it…in my un-dried dreams.”
— Man, even the ending of this sketch is epic, with the unique blocking of the performers during the mock-dramatic ending shot.
— Overall, such a masterpiece. In a season where Will has sadly been pretty invisible, and a season that also ends up being his final one, it’s great to see at least one more live sketch that focuses on Will’s trademark delightfully oddball humor.
STARS: *****


GOODNIGHTS


IMMEDIATE POST-SHOW THOUGHTS
— A decent episode. There was a lot of average material, and a few meh or flat-out bad things, but the show’s quality was given a boost with three standout very strong pieces: Shy Ronnie, Kickspit Underground Rock Festival, and (especially) Potato Chip Thief.


MY PERSONAL CHOICE OF “BEST OF” MOMENTS FOR THIS EPISODE, REPRESENTED WITH SCREENCAPS


RATED SEGMENTS RANKED FROM BEST TO WORST
Potato Chip Thief
Kickspit Underground Rock Festival
Shy Ronnie
Vagisil Superstars of Bowling Tournament 1989
White House Crashers
UPS 2
Late Night with Chris Hansen
UPS 1
Monologue
The Situation Room with Wolf Blitzer
Weekend Update
Gossip Girl: Staten Island
Skirt Shopping


HOW THIS EPISODE STACKS UP AGAINST THE PRECEDING ONE (Joseph Gordon-Levitt)
a slight step up


My full set of screencaps for this episode is here


TOMORROW
Taylor Lautner

November 21, 2009 – Joseph Gordon-Levitt / Dave Matthews Band (S35 E7)

Segments are rated on a scale of 1-5 stars

CHINA PRESS CONFERENCE
Hu Jintao (WLF) expects to be screwed by debtor Barack Obama (FRA)

— Some funny sarcastic comments from Will as Hu Jintao, translated into English by Nasim.
— The out-of-nowhere sardonic “I like to be kissed when SOMEONE IS DOING SEX TO ME!!!” bit cracked me up, especially with how unexpected it was.
— Blah, now they’re overdoing the hell out of the “DOING SEX TO ME!!!” outbursts.
— Boy, this cold opening is going on freakin’ FOREVER, with increasingly less laughs along the way. Any of the goodwill I had towards it earlier on has been long forgotten and tarnished by this point.
STARS: *½


MONOLOGUE
host performs “Make ‘Em Laugh” from Singin’ In The Rain

— Joseph Gordon-Levitt, regarding plans for his monologue: “I figured, why not open with a big number?” Normally, that would have me groaning out loud, but I’m aware in hindsight what an epic monologue this turns out to be.
— I like the running bit with Joseph’s “If you haven’t seen it, your girlfriend/grandma has” whenever he mentions a movie.
— We’re early on into Joseph’s “Make ‘Em Laugh” performance, and it’s already coming off very solid and committed.
— When Joseph asks Bobby if he can believe SNL is letting him perform “Make ‘Em Laugh”, I love Bobby’s sarcastic “No, I can’t believe it” response. I’d like to think that’s a self-deprecating dig at SNL’s over-reliance on musical monologues.
— Very funny running gag with the slaps/punches Bobby randomly gives Joseph.
— Joseph’s already-great “Make ‘Em Laugh” performance is now getting full-on amazing, as he’s doing a whole bunch of great physical actions during it.
— Now he’s doing VERY impressive backflips off of walls, on live TV! I remember how absolutely shocked and impressed I was by this when this originally aired, and I’m still impressed today.
— Love the way the performance ended.
— An absolutely fantastic overall monologue, and with this one piece alone, Joseph Gordon-Levitt has proven he will be miles better of a host than the infamous preceding host – January Jones.
STARS: *****


PALIN 2012
Democrats’ recut 2012 trailer gives vision of disastrous Palin presidency

— A surprising return of the “An SNL Trailer Re-Cut” segment, several years after the Apocalypto one. This ends up being the final one.
— Funny idea to mix a hypothetical future Sarah Palin presidency with apocalyptic footage from the movie 2012. This is being executed well.
— “From the mind of Keith Olbermann…”
— Hilarious reveal of Glenn Beck being vice president.
STARS: ***½


SECRET WORD
actress Mindy Grayson (KRW) is useless on classic game show

— The debut of a sketch I’ve always despised.
— Part of Kristen’s opening line is a delighted “LOOK AT ME!!!”, a line that perfectly sums up so many of the badly-written attention-starved characters Kristen’s been given over the years of her SNL tenure. Only three seconds into the debut of this particular Secret Word character of Kristen’s, and I already hate the character.
— Given how underused Will has been in this final season of his, it feels sad seeing him relegated to playing a boring straight man to a bad Kristen Wiig character.
— A very weak and one-note gag with Kristen’s character always immediately revealing the exact same secret word (drape) she’s supposed to give hints of.
— I like Bill’s goofy-voiced aggravated delivery of “D’ohhhhh boyyyyy”.
— Another funny line from Bill, with him hesitantly and passive aggressively telling Kristen’s character, “I’ll…tell ya…when…to start”, after she tries to start one of the rounds herself. Bill’s providing my only real laughs of this sketch, though I do like Joseph’s characterization of his Latin crooner character.
STARS: *½


TWO WORLDS COLLIDE FT. REBA MCENTIRE
ANS loves man pretending to be Reba McEntire (KET)

— Yet ANOTHER highly-acclaimed and well-remembered music video from Lonely Island, who have been on a hot streak with these music videos lately.
— The idea of Kenan, of all people, randomly playing Reba McEntire is fucking priceless.
— I guess I could say my usual “Kenan In A Dress alert”, but at least this short is putting the Kenan In A Dress trope to good use. This is also putting Kenan’s penchant for bug-eyed mugging to good use, given the fact that he’s imitating Reba here.
— I love Kenan’s goofy redneck-voiced singing, and it’s a funny contrast to Andy’s typical hardcore rapping.
— When this originally aired, back in the days when I couldn’t stand Kenan and viewed him as one of the weakest links of this cast, I was impressed by him in this short and felt it was by far one of the better things he had ever done on SNL. Looking back on this short years later, especially after I’ve softened a lot on Kenan and gained a lot of respect for him, I now view this short as a continuation of Kenan’s growth arc that officially started with the What Up With That debut earlier this season.
— Kenan throughout this short: “Ahhhh’m Reba!”
— Even the juvenile and crude conceit with “Reba” secretly being a man is absolutely working for me in this context.
STARS: ****½


THE MELLOW SHOW WITH JACK JOHNSON
Ozzy Osbourne (Dave Matthews) now likes to take it easy

— The somewhat surprising return of a one-off sketch from two seasons prior.
— Kinda interesting now having Bill’s Dave Matthews be the co-host of tonight’s Mellow Show installment, after he was just a guest in the previous installment.
— I like the random statements of mellow-centric things Andy’s Jack Johnson says into the camera (e.g. “Ultimate frisbee”) as a non-sequitur. I can’t remember if he did the same thing in the first installment of this sketch.
— Andy and Bill giving each other a foot-five, ala a high-five, was hilarious. You can also tell Andy is holding back a laugh afterwards.
— Pretty good Jason Mraz impression from Joseph.
— A fairly memorable Ozzy Osbourne impression from the real Dave Matthews.
— Our obligatory tongue-in-cheek bit with Dave Matthews, while in character as Ozzy, insulting Bill’s Dave Matthews. I don’t mind the sometimes-groanworthy “celebrity confronts a cast member impersonating them” trope as much when the celebrity is playing another celebrity, such as here.
STARS: ***


WHAT UP WITH THAT?
panelists spectate; Al Gore & Mindy Kaling cameos

— I see SNL ain’t wasting any time, as they’ve brought back What Up With That a mere THREE EPISODES after its debut.
— This is following the exact same same formula as the first installment of this sketch, but it’s certainly still loads of fun.
— Awww, yeah! Here comes Jason and his red tracksuited dancing!
— I love Andy suddenly jumping into the scene as a dancing hip-hop clown. His dancing is very funny.
— Absolutely hilarious inclusion of Bobby as a tap-dancing Jake “The Snake” Roberts.
— The camera hasn’t been showing Jason’s epic dancing quite as much as usual tonight.
— Kenan’s final lyric about having “the egg burp” is cracking me up.
STARS: ****½


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “You & Me”


WEEKEND UPDATE
to effect environmental change, Al Gore [real] will start acting crazy

— Another appearance tonight from Al Gore, who’s always fun on SNL.
— A good laugh from Gore bluntly revealing his backup plan: “I’m gonna start acting crazy.”
— I like Gore’s various insane-but-oddly-clever ideas.
— Great sarcastic comment from Gore about his “excitement” over having a bully pulpit on a fourth-place network.
— I really like Seth’s delivery of his George W. Bush joke.
— Wow, an actual fairly short Update with only one guest commentary! Feels incredibly rare to see a one-guest Update in the solo Seth Meyers era of Update. Wish it happened far more often.
STARS: ***½


DYSFUNCTIONAL THANKSGIVING DINNER
family tensions have everyone on-edge at contentious Thanksgiving dinner

— Oh, no, what are you doing, SNL?!? The Dysfunctional Christmas Dinner sketch from the preceding season’s Hugh Laurie episode was a near-classic the first time, but it has no business being made into a recurring sketch. It’s not at all something that’ll work nearly as well in a rehash. On top of that, you’re going to re-cast Abby into the general role that the recently-fired Casey Wilson played in the first installment, an installment of which Casey HERSELF co-wrote (with Kristen), by the way? Really, SNL?
— When I first reviewed this sketch in my original 2009 review of this episode (link here), I went into a HUGE rant, where my point was basically “What was the point of SNL firing Casey Wilson and Michaela Watkins if the show’s going to continue doing sketches Casey and Michaela were prominent in, and re-casting roles of theirs?” I was also upset over SNL’s decision to continue doing the Casey Wilson-co-written Dysfunctional Christmas Dinner sketch AFTER Casey’s firing, as it seemed like a slap in the face to her.
— In my current review, I’ll try to judge this sketch with a less-bitter mindset, but I still can’t help but feel it will pale badly in comparison to the almost-untouchable Dysfunctional Christmas Dinner sketch.
— Kristen has the ability to get laughs just from simply sipping a drink and eating from her fork in a subtly-tense manner.
— So far, despite some laughs I’m getting, this has been such a carbon copy of the original Dysfunctional Christmas Dinner sketch. The “Sit down, Judith!” running bit in particular is not working as well as last time, and it feels like they’re relying a little too heavily on it this time.
— Now they’re even copying the bit where the tense family suddenly unites by singing together. Doesn’t even make much sense to me in this Thanksgiving-related context, whereas the family singing together on Christmas was far more fitting.
— Overall, while I admit this rehashed sketch was not quite as worthless as I previously made it out to be in my afore-linked 2009 review, I still didn’t enjoy the sketch much. Too much unnecessary and inferior copying of the first installment of this sketch.
STARS: **


WOMAN TO WOMAN
insensitive sub Rodger Brush (FRA) is ill-suited adviser

— The debut of these Rodger Brush sketches starring Fred.
— Back in the original era, SNL had a Gilda Radner-starring recurring talk show sketch with this same title (Woman To Woman).
— A fairly funny reveal of Fred as a bald, overweight, brash-looking man sitting in for the female host of this tender female-oriented advice show.
— Ugh, only two minutes into this sketch, and I’ve already gotten extremely sick of the redundant running bit with Fred asking the female guests to speak louder.
— The joke of Fred’s bad, generic advice to the guests is another thing in this sketch that’s getting old fast.
— Though he has no comedic lines, Joseph’s performance is very solid.
— Overall, ugh. Not a good sketch at all, and I dread having to cover subsequent installments of this sketch.
STARS: *½


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “Shake Me Like A Monkey”


SAY ANYTHING
Lloyd Dobler’s (host) “In Your Eyes” boombox strategy bemuses (JAS)

— Between the spoof of the movie 2012 earlier tonight and now a Say Anything spoof, John Cusack’s filmography is getting a real workout in tonight’s episode.
— When Jason initially walks on and sees Joseph standing in a bold, still position while holding up a boombox, I got a big laugh from Jason just responding to that with a hesitant-but-accepting “Alright…” and then immediately exiting the shot.
— Interesting concept for a Say Anything spoof, and I like this idea of Jason as a random character interrupting an iconic movie scene. (Now that I write that, it almost sounds like something that could’ve been made into a solid recurring sketch, with Jason interrupting an iconic scene from a different movie each time.) This is a great showcase for Jason’s general performance style.
— A funny “This kid loves cassettes” comment from Jason when Joseph takes a break from holding up a boombox to speak into a tape recorder.
— The “Genesis is back together!” ending was hilarious.
— Overall, a strong Jason Sudeikis showcase.
STARS: ****


GOODNIGHTS


IMMEDIATE POST-SHOW THOUGHTS
— A mixed episode. To me, this episode feels better than it actually is, due to how solid, fun, energetic, and likable of a host Joseph Gordon-Levitt was, and how he had a monologue for the ages. He was EXACTLY the type of host SNL needed after January Jones’ horribly-received hosting stint. However, when I think back on the quality of tonight’s episode itself, I’m recalling quite a number of things I didn’t like. We also got the debuts of two awful recurring sketches: Secret Word and Rodger Brush (no surprise that one of them stars Kristen Wiig and the other one stars Fred Armisen, because, as I’ve mentioned in a somewhat recent review, a number of online SNL fans seem to consider those two performers to be the usual culprits of the worst sketches from these 2009-2012 years), two sketches that we’ll be seeing too often within these next few seasons. However, tonight had some pretty good things and a few VERY strong pieces, balancing this out to an overall fairly-watchable-though-shaky episode.


MY PERSONAL CHOICE OF “BEST OF” MOMENTS FOR THIS EPISODE, REPRESENTED WITH SCREENCAPS


RATED SEGMENTS RANKED FROM BEST TO WORST
Monologue
Two Worlds Collide ft. Reba McEntire
What Up With That?
Say Anything
Palin 2012
Weekend Update
The Mellow Show with Jack Johnson
Dysfunctional Thanksgiving Dinner
China Press Conference
Woman To Woman
Secret Word


HOW THIS EPISODE STACKS UP AGAINST THE PRECEDING ONE (January Jones)
a definite step up (needless to say)


My full set of screencaps for this episode is here


TOMORROW
Blake Lively

November 14, 2009 – January Jones / Black Eyed Peas (S35 E6)

Segments are rated on a scale of 1-5 stars

BIDEN FIXES HEALTH CARE
Joe Biden (JAS) aims to solve health care reform while Obama is away

— Jason’s always-funny Joe Biden impression is one of the few people who I don’t mind seeing do a straight-to-camera address-to-the-nation cold opening. It’s sure as hell a lot more preferable to seeing one from Fred’s President Obama.
— Pretty funny how the only choices Jason’s Biden has on “easy” things to resolve are Afghanistan, the economy, and healthcare.
— Jason-as-Biden’s harsh “fat girl” analogy was very funny.
— A laugh from the “Stimulus is working” bit.
— A very odd and sloppy delivery of the word “hardliners” from Jason.
— I like Jason’s Biden following his statement, “Some of you out there are asking, ‘Joe, how are you going to pay for a $1.2 trillion plan by cutting taxes?’”, by pausing in a deadpan manner for a while and then moving on to the next topic, not even answering the question he just asked.
STARS: ***½


MONOLOGUE
Mad Men fans (JAS), (FRA), (BIH), (ABE) sing theme song to host

— Hoo, boy. January Jones’ stumbly delivery right out of the gate is already a worrisome sign of things to come.
— I like the idea of Mad Men fanatics being called Mad Mennies, ala Trekkies. Jason, Bill, and Fred are pretty fun in these roles.
— Fred’s “I like Peggy” line is obviously a wink-wink reference to Fred’s real-life then-relationship with Peggy’s actress, Elisabeth Moss. Unfortunately, this reference hasn’t aged well, given how badly Fred and Moss’ relationship would eventually sour.
— Seeing Abby as Mad Men’s Joan just makes me miss Casey Wilson, who previously played this role to perfection even in just a small appearance. This is one of way-too-many examples of Abby, Nasim, or Jenny taking over a role previously played by the recently-fired Casey Wilson or Michaela Watkins.
STARS: ***


TODAY
Kathie Lee Gifford’s (KRW) singing freaks out musical guest

— Geez, as soon as I complained about Casey and Michaela’s roles being replaced, we already get another example, with Jenny taking over Michaela’s Hoda Kotb impression. IIRC, SNL announced before the start of this season that Nasim would take over the Hoda impression (and she eventually would, but it wouldn’t happen until two seasons later, long after the firing of her castmate Jenny), so I’m not sure what made them change their mind between that announcement and tonight’s episode.
— As expected, Jenny seems kinda out of place in this role, and is lacking the certain understated spark and likable professionalism that Michaela brought to the role.
— Kristen-as-Kathie-Lee-Gifford’s detailing of her lovemaking routine with her husband is fairly funny.
— An often-mentioned bad gaffe as soon as the camera first shows January in this sketch: she, out of character, LITERALLY ASKS “Which camera???” in a whispery voice to someone off-camera in SNL’s studio, then pauses awkwardly when realizing the camera caught her asking that, then proceeds to deliver her scripted dialogue. My god.
— (*sigh*) And even after proceeding to deliver her scripted dialogue after the aforementioned gaffe, January’s delivery seems fairly halting.
— I’m kinda meh on this “Everyone Has A Story” segment.
— (*sigh*) And now January has begun tripping over her lines, much like at the beginning of the monologue.
— The bit with the Black Eyed Peas suddenly beating THE HELL out of Kristen’s Kathie Lee in the middle of her song had me howling with laughter back when this originally aired (probably because I couldn’t stand Kristen’s Kathie Lee impression back then, and thus, was delighted to see her get the beatdown I felt she deserved), but something about this beatdown sequence rubs me the wrong way nowadays. Reportedly, and unsurprisingly, it rubbed the real Kathie Lee the wrong way, too, as I recently learned that she complained about it shortly after the original airing of this episode.
STARS: **


REAR WINDOW
Grace Kelly’s (host) nonstop flatulence disrupts filming of Rear Window

— Pretty funny Alfred Hitchcock impression from Bobby, and I also like Jason’s Jimmy Stewart impression.
— Aaaaaaaand there goes all of my goodwill, as we get the first fart of this sketch. (*sigh*) This is going to be a looooooong sketch.
— Yeah, two-and-a-half-minutes into this, and I fucking hate this. Is SNL kidding me with this? SNL has actually done a few well-executed fart sketches in the past, but this sure as hell ain’t one of them.
— While not enough to come remotely close to salvaging this sketch, Jason’s delivery of “That’s because you’re sick, Grace! You’re sick!” amused me. It clearly amused January, too, as it makes her crack up out of character, which makes yet another gaffe from her tonight.
— What an awful, lazy ending.
STARS: *


WIIX NEWS
Michelle Dison clumsily woos Dairy Queen employee (host) during live shot

— Wow, a surprising return of a recurring sketch that hasn’t appeared since way back in season 32. What inspired them to bring this sketch out of the mothballs this week? The fact that they had such a weak host?
— This is going the EXACT SAME route as the previous two installments of this sketch. Even though Kristen is still selling this well and is getting some laughs from me, this sketch feels a little too old hat, even after its three-season absence.
— Very solid straight man performance from Jason in the news studio, and I’m liking the cutaways to his dumbfounded, silent facial reactions. January’s straight man performance, on the other hand, is as bland as bland can be.
— Kristen’s Michelle Dison to January: “You look like a mannequin.” A perfect unintentional description of both January’s performances in tonight’s sketches in general and her demeanor in this particular sketch.
— Pretty funny ending with Michelle Dison accidentally removing her shirt and revealing her bra on live TV in an attempt to get bees away from her.
STARS: **½


A LADY’S GUIDE TO THROWING A PARTY
archaic mores in 1952 how-to

— Clearly, this must be an intentional companion piece to the “Don Draper’s Guide To Picking Up Women” short from the preceding season’s episode hosted by January’s Mad Men co-star Jon Hamm.
— Terrific old-timey visual quality of this short, making this look EXACTLY like an authentic 1950s/1960s instructional film.
— (*groan*) Fred making a walk-on in his typical gay stereotype role, I see.
— I love the part with January telling us “If a black person arrives…just kidding.” For the first (and, IIRC, only) time all night, January is clearly in her element in this pre-taped period piece.
— Good ending regarding what women should do if they have to relieve themselves.
— Very strong piece overall, and the first thing all night that feels like it’s worth really bragging about.
STARS: ****½


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “I Gotta Feeling”


WEEKEND UPDATE
Lou Dobbs (DAH) is leaving CNN so he can sustain his paranoid xenophobia

NBC series pairing Bernie Madoff & Khalid Sheikh Mohammed is punishment

Kim Kardashian (NAP) loves her butt more than sister Khloe & Reggie Bush

Jon Bovi’s lyrical inversion requires the use of questionable opposites

— Darrell Hammond in yet another season 35 cameo.
— Some good oh-so-wrong laughs from Darrell-as-Lou-Dobbs’ racist, un-PC comments about the Latin takeover of the news.
— Something about Darrell’s delivery of “He’s got that…Latin…tiiiinge” had me laughing out loud.
— An interesting Bernie & The Shiekh opening title sequence with a Kenan-sung theme song. I’m also always a sucker for what I call the “Jeffersons font” (the font used in the opening and closing credits of the sitcom The Jeffersons) that they’re using for the captioned lyrics on the bottom of the screen.
— The aforementioned Kenan-sung Bernie & The Shiekh theme song is surprisingly the closest to an involvement Kenan has in this entire episode. He’s nowhere to be seen ANYWHERE in this episode. Given this episode’s negative reputation, perhaps Kenan should consider himself lucky he was shut out of this episode.
— The debut of Nasim’s Kim Kardashian impression.
— Odd voice Nasim is using for Kim, but it and her portrayal in general are making me laugh.
— Always a treat to see Jon Bovi.
— This sadly feels like the first big role Will has gotten in quite a while, showing how much his airtime has been reduced this season.
— Jon Bovi begin this commentary by singing the exact same “Good Medicine” song they sang in their last appearance prior to this. In my review of that last appearance, I said that “Good Medicine” song has stuck in my memory over the years. After now seeing that they reused the song in tonight’s commentary, I understand why that song stuck in my memory over the years.
— Hilarious comment from Jason saying his mustache isn’t on his face. Speaking of which, has anybody else ever noticed that, in Jon Bovi’s very first appearance (in a sketch from the season 32 Jaime Pressly episode), Jason’s character actually had a facial mustache (screencap below), but he doesn’t have it in any of the other Jon Bovi appearances?

— A very funny opposite version of the song “Single Ladies” from Jon Bovi.
— Hmm. Some portions of tonight’s Jon Bovi commentary don’t feel as strong as usual, but I’m still enjoying it. I hope these characters aren’t slowly starting to run out of steam, as much as I love them.
— Wait, I just now checked SNL Archives, and this actually ends up being Jon Bovi’s final SNL appearance! Wow. (Then again, I forgot this is Will’s final season.) At least they got out at the right time, before they got too stale.
— I like how Seth, when signing off after Jon Bovi’s commentary, copies Jon Bovi’s “opposite” routine by ending his sign-off with “Good morning!” instead of “Good night!”
STARS: ***


SCIENTIFIC SYMPOSIUM
Dr. Jekyll (BIH) claims Mr. Hyde is to blame for his homosexual episodes

— Bill is always perfect in these old-timey black-and-white sketches.
— (*groan*) OH FUCKING NO. The big reveal of this sketch’s conceit is that…it’s a gay-themed Dr. Jekyll & Mr. Hyde take-off, with Jekyll claiming his Mr. Hyde personality is who he does “gay stuff” as??? Are you fucking kiddi–….. (*sigh*) Between the fart-filled Rear Window sketch and now this, I swear tonight’s episode must be relying on old, unused scripts from the dreary season 30. These Rear Window and Jekyll/Hyde sketches have the exact same sophomoric hyperfocus on horribly-written hacky bathroom and gay-stereotype humor that dominated season 30. This Jekyll/Hyde sketch in particular, had it aired in season 30, would’ve been considered a companion piece to that dreadful Mrs. Dr. Frankenstein sketch from that season’s Kate Winslet episode.
— Aaaaaaaand this sketch somehow gets fucking WORSE, as we now have Fred making his second typical gay stereotype walk-on in tonight’s episode ALONE. I…I have no words.
— Now Bill’s Jekyll is going on and on about the homoerotic-sounding “Fire Island” that he frequents. Ohhh, the end of this hacky-ass sketch cannot come soon enough. This is AWFUL.
STARS: *


GET OUT
(FRA) can’t avoid encountering (ANS) sitting on the toilet

— After getting two season 30-esque juvenile sketches tonight, now we get a toilet short…
— Fred walking in on a toilet-sitting Andy in increasingly out-of-place locations is making me laugh. However, something feels kinda throwaway about this Digital Short compared to most of Lonely Island’s SNL output. This is still certainly better than some of the utter trash that has aired in tonight’s episode, though.
— A very dumb ending, but I chuckled. However, I remember an online SNL fan back at this time in 2009 pointing out that a bottomless Fred sitting on Andy’s naked lap furthers the juvenile, cheap homoerotic vibe of tonight’s episode. Good point.
STARS: ***


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “Meet Me Halfway”


CLOUD GAZING
(host)’s lack of imagination hampers cloud-watching date with (JAS)

— Hmm, interesting setting of this, and the overhead camera angle used for this entire sketch feels very unique for SNL.
— Very big night for Jason, appearing in a majority of the sketches and doing a lot of the heavy lifting in them.
— What’s that off-camera mumbling I’m hearing early on in this sketch? Are those SNL stagehands speaking in the studio? Do they not realize we can hear them?
— Yikes, January’s half-inaudible delivery of her intentionally-corny “Wiz” joke was TERRIBLE, and caused it to bomb with the audience.
— Meh, a lazy premise (in an episode filled with lazy premises) of January playing a dumb bimbo.
— Jason is giving yet another great straight man performance, and is really helping this sketch’s quality. I especially like how, after one dumb statement of January’s, Jason looks around and asks “Am I on Punk’d or something?”
— January actually has some decently funny lines, but her delivery, in terms of quality, keeps coming and going all throughout, and never reaching the solidness it needs to put this sketch over.
STARS: **½


GOODNIGHTS
musical guest performs “Boom Boom Pow”

— So are we just handing out special goodnights musical performances to EVERY musical guest by this point? It doesn’t feel right to me that the Black Eyed Peas get this honor. Perhaps this is a sign of how poorly written and underwritten tonight’s episode is, that SNL possibly had to rely on the Black Eyed Peas to fill up time at the end of the show.


IMMEDIATE POST-SHOW THOUGHTS
— A weak episode that, while not quite as horrible as its reputation, still sucked. (Also known as “The Nancy Kerrigan Episode Syndrome”.) A lot of this episode had an off feel, furthered by January Jones giving such a lousy and sloppy hosting performance. There was also a lazy feel to a lot of this episode, especially with 1) the unnecessary random rehashing of the Michelle Dison sketches from three seasons prior, and 2) the regression with SNL relying on season 30-esque bathroom/gay-stereotype humor. Only one segment in this entire episode stood out as strong (A Lady’s Guide To Throwing A Party). The fact that NBC would end up never rerunning this episode shows that even SNL themselves are of the common opinion that this episode is a flop.


MY PERSONAL CHOICE OF “BEST OF” MOMENTS FOR THIS EPISODE, REPRESENTED WITH SCREENCAPS


RATED SEGMENTS RANKED FROM BEST TO WORST
A Lady’s Guide To Throwing A Party
Biden Fixes Health Care
Weekend Update
Get Out
Monologue
Cloud Gazing
WIIX News
Today
Rear Window
Scientific Symposium


HOW THIS EPISODE STACKS UP AGAINST THE PRECEDING ONE (Taylor Swift)
a big step down


My full set of screencaps for this episode is here


TOMORROW
Joseph Gordon-Levitt

November 7, 2009 – Taylor Swift (S35 E5)

Segments are rated on a scale of 1-5 stars

END OF AN ERA
Fox News election coverage prematurely declares the end of the Obama era

— Funny Greta Van Susteren impression from Kristen.
— The debut of Bill’s underrated Shepard Smith impression, probably one of my favorite things Bill has ever done on SNL. That voice and the “I’m a naughty boy” demeanor he always uses as Smith always slays me.
— Funny line from Bobby’s Karl Rove, in regards to President Obama: “And don’t forget, it was under his watch that we lost the King of Pop.”
— Fantastic Glenn Beck performance from Jason, and his segment steals this sketch.
— Great trick Kristen does at the end where she seamlessly switches from speaking out of one corner of her mouth to the other.
STARS: ***½


MONOLOGUE
host plays guitar & sings about topics unsuitable for her monologue

— As a funny variation of a joke SNL previously used with a few young adult hosts in the past (e.g. Christina Ricci, Justin Timberlake), in which they say they watched the show when growing up “way back” in the days when (insert cast members from not too long ago here) were on the show, Taylor Swift goes one step further and says she used to stay up past her bedtime to watch SNL “way back” when [current cast members] Bill Hader and Andy Samberg were on the show.
— Despite being yet another damn musical monologue, Taylor is making it very fun. Her song has a lot of very solid lyrics about what she’s “not” going to sing about, and she’s doing a great job getting me and the audience on her side, especially during the bit about her celebrity ex-boyfriend, Joe Jonas.
— Great bit with Bill and Jason as security guards holding up a police sketch of Kanye West.
— Speaking of the Kayne bit, I remember being relieved back at this time in 2009 that the obligatory reference to the then-overexposed Kanye/Taylor/VMAs incident ended up only being a small bit in this monologue. Unfortunately, a month later, SNL would have Taylor Lautner do an entire monologue focusing on the Kanye/VMAs incident.
— Very strong monologue overall, and it’s given me a lot of confidence in Taylor as a host.
STARS: ****½


CARTER N’ SONS BBQ
Carter (BOM) N’ Sons BBQ restaurant regrets its “swine fever” ad campaign

— Very funny conceit with this innocent “Swine Fever”-themed commercial coming off very unfortunate when airing during the Swine Flu epidemic at this time in 2009. This hits even more nowadays when watching this during a certain pandemic going on in our current times.
— Andy’s brief, lighthearted one-liner about Swine Fever being the death of him is hilarious.
STARS: ****


THE VIEW
attention-hungry Kate Gosselin (host) & Nicolas Cage (ANS)

— Nasim’s not doing the best Barbara Walters impression, but I still like it, and I feel it’s better than the one Michaela Watkins did the preceding season.
— I can’t judge the accuracy of Taylor’s Kate Gosselin impression, given that I’m not familiar with Gosselin’s voice, but Taylor definitely seems to be going for a distinct portrayal here, and her performance is coming off really good.
— Boy, Kristen-as-Elisabeth-Hasselbeck’s constant rants are so grating, and not grating in the funny, satirical way it’s intended to be.
— The debut of Andy’s great Nicolas Cage impression.
— The interview with Andy’s Cage ended up being way too short. I would’ve taken more of that and less of certain other aspects of this sketch.
STARS: **½


FIRELIGHT
Twilight-knockoff movie substitutes Frankensteins for vampires

— Solid idea of a Frankenstein-themed Twilight spoof.
— Much like the High School Musical 4 sketch from the preceding season’s Zac Efron episode, I’ve never seen the source material this Firelight short is spoofing and I can still tell this spoof is very well-done, and I’m enjoying it a lot.
— Good lip-biting mannerism Taylor keeps doing throughout this.
— This is so well-filmed.
— Funny appearance from Andy as a teenage mummy. Speaking of which, when this originally aired, I remember some online SNL fans speculating if that might have been Taylor Lautner making a cameo as the mummy. I guess those SNL fans felt that what little we could see of the performer’s face behind the mummy bandages resembled Lautner. The voice makes it VERY obvious it’s Andy playing the mummy.
STARS: ****


HOLLYWOOD DISH
Hollywood Dish anchors (BIH) & (KRW) elicit desired responses from host

— The first appearance of this occasionally-appearing recurring sketch.
— So far, I’m having very mixed feelings on the humor here, and those mixed feelings are leaning closer to the “Don’t like it” side. This seems like just an excuse to have Bill and Kristen make various over-the-top facial reactions.
— Yeah, more and more, I’m seeing that this humor just isn’t for me.
— I do like the part with Taylor being forced to do a very stiff, unnatural laugh, and how the Hollywood Dish show eventually airs it out of context in a cruel manner during a preview of Taylor’s interview.
STARS: **


T.R.A.A.A.P.D.
teen (host) lists parental car sins worse than driving-while-texting

— Lots of solid relatable humor here. I particularly like the “Birds and The Bees Talk” scene, and how it ends with Taylor desperately trying to put an end to it by grabbing the steering wheel and swerving the car.
— This sketch is getting funnier and funnier. The “He’s got a gun! He’s got a gun!” part is especially hilarious.
STARS: ****


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
host performs “You Belong With Me”


WEEKEND UPDATE
SEM suspects that Nicholas Fehn doesn’t actually have anything to say

Sarah McLachlan (ABE) upsets SEM with plaintive animal-rights crooning

incredulous SEM & AMP say “Really!?!” to Goldman Sachs’ H1N1 vaccine use

— OH, NO. Nicholas Fehn once again.
— Sure, we’ve gotten a long break from Nicholas Fehn since his last appearance, but not even that makes this character come off fresher to me. His initially-funny shtick became officially played-out after his second appearance.
— Much like how the Judy Grimes (a.k.a. Kristen’s “Just kidding” character) commentary earlier this season had a brief, half-assed attempt at a change of pace with her bringing out a chart, SNL does a brief, half-assed attempt at a change of pace in tonight’s Nicholas Fehn commentary by having him try to write down a point he’s failing to say, but it ends up going the exact same route you’d expect it to.
— This Sarah McLachlan commentary is a solid showcase for Abby, and ends up being one of the more memorable things she would do in her forgettable SNL tenure.
— One complaint I have about the Sarah McLachlan commentary is that Seth’s interjections are way too much, and are unnecessary. He’s overdoing it.
Loved Seth’s “Women with two vaginas” jokes, especially the second one.
— An Amy Poehler appearance out of nowhere, joining Seth in a “Really?!?” segment.
— With the cameo Amy made at the end of the preceding season, her randomly co-anchoring ALL of the Weekend Update Thursdays from earlier this season (a decision from SNL that I still don’t understand to this day), and now her cameo in tonight’s episode, I remember it felt to me back at this time in 2009 like Amy never left the show in the first place. We’re clearly in the era of recently-departed cast members being afraid to cut the proverbial umbilical cord after leaving the show. I take a lot of issue with that. Fred would be one of the absolute WORST at this, making a countless number of unnecessary cameos the season (season 39) after he leaves. I’m pretty sure his total amount of airtime that season is higher than that of some of that season’s featured players (e.g. John Milhiser).
— Hate to say it, but a lot of Amy and Seth’s quips during tonight’s “Really?!?” edition are coming off kinda meh and are washing over me. This is the second consecutive subpar “Really?!?” edition they’ve done together (the first one being in the preceding season’s finale).
STARS: ***


WEDDING RECEPTION
Penelope’s hyperbolic attention-seeking upstages newlyweds at reception

— A fairly funny bit with Penelope wearing horse blinders.
— I’ve been tolerant of Penelope’s shtick for a long time, despite its one-note nature, but it’s actually coming off fairly tiring tonight. Even the audience seems to somewhat agree with me, as they’re usually more responsive during these sketches. I’m still getting some laughs, though.
STARS: **½


SCARED STRAIGHT
joyriding teens aren’t fazed by Lorenzo McIntosh & fellow con (host)

— Feels odd seeing this recurring sketch appearing so late in the show.
— Oh my god at the initial visual of Taylor dressed like…THAT.
— This has to be the shortest that Andy’s hair has looked up to this point in his SNL tenure. This is noteworthy given the trademark shaggy hair Andy was known for having in his preceding seasons.
— Feels a little odd seeing Taylor Swift participating in prison rape jokes, but perhaps that shows what a game host she is.
— I like Jason’s “Gave you guys WAY too much leeway on that one!” line after Kenan and Taylor’s rape-related Sound Of Music song bit.
— There goes Bill’s now-obligatory character break when Kenan and the host gang up on him in these Scared Straight sketches. After recently seeing how badly he lost his composure during the dress rehearsal version of the Shia LaBeouf installment of this sketch, shown as a Bud Light Golden Wheat-sponsored clip in one of the commercial breaks of the preceding Gerard Butler-hosted episode, Bill’s laughing in this sketch seems very tame.
— A big laugh from the “1.21 jizz-a-watts” line during the Back To The Future bit.
— Now we get the also-now-obligatory character break from Bill, Andy, and Bobby when Jason hops up onto his desk in a sitting position in these Scared Straight sketches. This time, even Jason himself cracks up.
STARS: ***


ROOMIES
boyfriend (ANS) feels excluded by (NAP)’s close bond with roommate (host)

— Andy (and his new short hairstyle) is all over tonight’s episode. Talk about making up for his absence in the preceding episode.
— Nice to see such a big showcase for Nasim. I believe this is the first actual sketch she’s had a lead role in, after previously having a lead role in a Weekend Update commentary earlier this season. She’s been fitting in on SNL really well so far. (Fellow newbie, Jenny Slate, on the other hand, made her ONLY appearance of tonight’s entire episode in a pre-taped bit role in the Digital Short.)
— A good conceit with Taylor and Nasim’s overly-clinginess with each other, and how it shuts Andy out.
— I saw it coming a mile away that Taylor (who’s in the other room) was going to be revealed as the person on the other end of the phone call that Nasim receives.
— Much like the T.R.A.A.A.P.D. sketch earlier tonight, there’s a lot of solid relatable humor here. I’m even getting a fair amount of slice-of-life vibes from this, which, as I’ve said other times, is so rare at this point of SNL’s run, even if this particular sketch doesn’t have the semi-dramatic tone that SNL’s slice-of-life sketches from the 70s and 80s had.
— I love the bit with an emotional Nasim being dragged on the floor while grabbing onto the blanket that a walking-away Taylor is holding, made even funnier by how Nasim is also dragging the couch behind her via her feet.
STARS: ****


MUSICAL GUEST INTRO

— Something seemed to go awry during this part. This musical guest intro opens on a typical far-away shot of the musical guest stage while some stagehands are strangely seen in the shot, but there’s nobody in front of the camera to introduce Taylor’s performance (usually in the 90s and onwards, a cast member or special guest introduces the musical performances if the musical guest also happens to be that night’s host), and there’s an awkward stretch of silence with nothing happening. Then the mic’ed, off-camera voice of who appears to be Amy Poehler giggles loudly, then, while still off-camera, shouts out a half-audible “Once again, Taylor Swift!”, then Taylor begins her musical performance. What the hell happened there? Why wasn’t Amy (or whoever that was) onscreen during this intro, and why was there a long delay before it?


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
host performs “Untouchable”


BUNNY BUSINESS
star-laden soundtrack relegates movie to an afterthought

— The first of a series of occasionally-appearing sketches.
— Funny Randy Newman impression from Fred.
— Absolutely spot-on Natalie Merchant from Kristen.
— I love seeing Taylor doing an impression of Shakira, given the fact that Shakira was the musical guest in the preceding episode, and I’m always a sucker for SNL spoofing hosts or musical guests right after they were on the show. Taylor’s even wearing what appears to be the same outfit Shakira wore in the preceding episode, and is spoofing the “She Wolf” song that Shakira performed in that episode. On top of that, Taylor’s Shakira impression is a lot of fun.
— Yet another sketch appearance tonight from the omnipresent Andy Samberg.
— Bill’s facial expression as Eddie Vedder is very funny.
— Oh, no. Just when I was enjoying everything in this sketch, we get a Kenan In A Dress alert, doing a groan-worthy take on Jennifer Hudson.
— An overall mostly fun sketch, but it went on a little too long, and the Kenan-in-drag bit was a poor way to end this.
STARS: ***½


GOODNIGHTS


IMMEDIATE POST-SHOW THOUGHTS
— A pretty solid episode. While not without its clunkers, this episode was mostly good and had several strong high points, especially in the pre-Weekend Update half. Considering her young age and lack of much acting experience, Taylor Swift did an impressive job as a host, being surprisingly very good in every single sketch, and committing to every single role. She also added well to the atmosphere of this episode, giving the show a fun, likable feel.


MY PERSONAL CHOICE OF “BEST OF” MOMENTS FOR THIS EPISODE, REPRESENTED WITH SCREENCAPS


RATED SEGMENTS RANKED FROM BEST TO WORST
Monologue
T.R.A.A.A.P.D.
Firelight
Roomies
Carter N’ Sons BBQ
End Of An Era
Bunny Business
Scared Straight
Weekend Update
The View
Wedding Reception
Hollywood Dish


HOW THIS EPISODE STACKS UP AGAINST THE PRECEDING ONE (Gerard Butler)
a step up


My full set of screencaps for this episode is here


TOMORROW
The notorious January Jones episode

October 17, 2009 – Gerard Butler / Shakira (S35 E4)

Segments are rated on a scale of 1-5 stars

THE ROCK OBAMA
health care obstructionists turn Barack Obama (FRA) into The Rock Obama

— An out-of-nowhere reprisal of The Rock Obama sketch from the preceding season.
— This feels a little empty without Andy’s Rahm Emanuel devilishly encouraging Obama to “get angry!” like he did in the first installment of this sketch. Speaking of Andy’s absence, we won’t be seeing him AT ALL in tonight’s episode. He was reportedly feeling under the weather this week and wasn’t able to do the show.
— And with this random sketch reprisal, we now, of course, get a Dwayne Johnson cameo. Always welcome to see him on SNL.
— Bill’s delivery of “He turns into…The Rock Obama!” was surprisingly weak. See, this is why we need Andy in this sketch.
— Funny bit with The Rock Obama clapping and responding “Hahahaha! Me like dog!” when making Bill bark like a dog.
— The arm-ripping/“Better call your insurance!” bit was HILARIOUS.
— After being stuck in Non-Speaking Bit Part Hell for the last two episodes, Jenny FINALLY gets her first speaking role in a live sketch since her notorious F-bomb from three episodes prior.
— The timing seems kinda off during the early portion of Jason-as-Joe-Biden’s conversation with The Rock Obama.
— I like the detail of Jason’s Biden yelling “Geroni-joooeeeeee!” when jumping through the wall.
STARS: ****


MONOLOGUE
host fends off attackers while singing “The Music Of The Night”

— Gerard Butler announces in a VERY excited manner that he’s the first Scotsman to ever host SNL. I recall an online SNL fan back at this time in 2009 pointing out that that’s NOT true. According to that fan, former hosts Alan Cumming and at least one other person (I forget who) are Scottish.
— Musical monologue? Uh-oh.
— Some okay sudden turns with Gerard occasionally fighting with enemies mid-song.
— Kristen’s walk-on noticeably gets big applause from the audience. Back when this originally aired, I took that as a sign of Kristen’s huge popularity, but then somebody online pointed out to me that the applause might’ve just been because Kristen was walking on as a Phantom Of The Opera character.
STARS: **½


FUQUAY SATIN’S GRAND HOOCHIE SKANK ROSÉ
Fuquay Satin’s (KET) skank rosé is ass-pouringest champagne

— An interesting and different-feeling SNL commercial for this era.
— Solid performance from Kenan. In hindsight, this feels like a warm-up for a big breakout moment Kenan will be having later in this episode with a certain sketch.
— Funny line from Kenan at the end regarding the drink tasting funny after being poured down someone’s ass.
STARS: ***


GAME TIME WITH RANDY AND GREG
alien Greg’s tail keeps conversation away from sports topics

— Odd how this is another sketch tonight that’s brought back from the preceding season’s Dwayne Johnson episode. This time, Dwayne himself has no involvement in this sketch, despite being in the building tonight. The co-host character he played in the first Game Time installment has been replaced with a co-host played by Kenan. As I pointed out in my review of the first installment of this sketch, the interesting thing about Kenan’s new co-host character is the fact that it’s the same character he played at the very end of the first installment of this sketch, who was introduced as the show’s upcoming guest. Nice continuity and attention to detail.
— Despite the “Game Time With Dave and Greg” title from the first installment now being “Game Time With Randy and Greg” in tonight’s installment (as can be seen on the TV screen in the background of most of the above screencaps for this sketch), this inexplicably still opens with the “Game Time With Dave and Greg” title screen by mistake (the first above screencap for this sketch). Wow. I nitpicked the Celebrity Family “Fued” typo in the Ryan Reynolds episode earlier this season, but that’s minor compared to this. How the heck did this “Dave And Greg” gaffe get past SNL’s editors? This would at least later be fixed in reruns.
— Love the bit with Kenan making tongue-clicking sounds to calm Bill’s Greg character down after his tail has appeared onscreen. The very distinct, loud, standout laugh from an audience member during this part makes it even funnier to me.
— While tonight’s Greg rehash is definitely still working, it seems kinda lazy for SNL to reuse the Game Time setting. There was a cut-after-dress-rehearsal sketch from the preceding season’s Zac Efron episode in which Greg, in what would’ve been his second-ever appearance, was put in a completely different setting as the co-host of a children’s show. (A publicity photo of this cut sketch was even shown online somewhere shortly after that episode’s original airing, but after 11 years, I can’t remember where I saw it, nor do I know if it’s still available. Maybe GettyImages has that photo nowadays, though.) So it seems that, at one time, the plan was for SNL to place Greg in different settings in each appearance he would make. However, since SNL deemed that aforementioned Zac Efron sketch not good enough to make it on the air (someone who attended the dress rehearsal of that episode claimed the sketch was actually great), I guess they decided to lazily play it safe by keeping Greg in the original Game Time setting.
— Like the first installment of this sketch, Seth has a rare non-Weekend Update role as the voice of a caller.
— Greg’s freak-out over Gerard grabbing his tail is absolutely priceless.
STARS: ****½


BEAUTY AND THE BEAST
Beast (host) thinks Belle (KRW) isn’t a Beauty since she lacks a big ass

— Great make-up on Gerard.
— I like Kristen’s facial reaction to Gerard’s “I can hardly wait until your transformation” line.
— Funny reveal that Gerard’s Beast is under the impression that Kristen’s Belle is the beast.
— Hilarious turn with Gerard’s Beast bluntly disclosing “I like a big ass.”
— Very funny performance from Bill as Lumiere, and I love his line about once dating a menorah.
— Great line from Bobby’s Cogsworth about a “3:45 ass”.
STARS: ****


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “She Wolf”


WEEKEND UPDATE
enlisted New Jerseyite same-sex couple won’t tell, prefers you don’t ask

Heene family balloon hovers by SEM in search of additional media coverage

SEM translates host’s Scottish-accented message to his family back home

Persistent Genital Arousal Disorder sufferer (KRW) gets stimulated

— (*groan*) Another appearance from the New Jersey Gay Couple. Thankfully, this ends up being their final appearance.
— Ugh, the New Jersey guys’ joke about gay soldiers being stationed at Fort Dix was groan-worthy enough the first time SNL used it, decades prior in the “At One With…” sketch with Joe Piscopo and Charles Rocket in the season 6 premiere.
— The bit with Seth being interrupted by the balloon from that infamous Balloon Boy hoax (man, does that take me back) is…odd. No idea what else to say about it.
— Very rare to see an SNL host do an Update commentary as themselves.
— Some of Seth’s translations of Gerard’s native Scottish message are pretty funny.
— Meh, an obvious joke with Kristen’s Persistent Genital Arousal Disorder sufferer eventually stifling orgasms during her commentary.
— Continuing tonight’s theme of audience members with a standout loud laugh, one audience member’s very noticeable constant laugh during one of Kristen’s stifled orgasm faces is making me laugh more than Kristen’s stifled orgasm face itself is.
— I did like the “Oh, that doesn’t help” response from Kristen when Seth tries to quell her orgasm-related grief by putting his hand on her shoulder.
STARS: ***


300
Leonidas (host) addresses Don’t Ask Don’t Tell with all-gay Spartan army

— A topical “Don’t ask, don’t tell”-themed 300 sketch? And right after Seth made a cheap joke just minutes ago on Update about 300 being “gay”? (*groan*)
— Another groan from me, at Fred doing his ol’ “lispy gay voice” routine once again.
— Fred and Bill playing another gay couple tonight? Really?
— I got a cheap laugh (my first laugh of the whole sketch) from Bobby in that stomach-baring outfit.
— An actual FUNNY bit right now, with Jason’s revelations of why he did all the homoerotic things he did with Gerard’s Leonidas. Even just the mere smug smile on Jason’s face during this part is cracking me up.
STARS: *½


WHAT UP WITH THAT?
singing & dancing bumps panelists; James Franco cameo

— Ladies and gentlemen, we have a major recurring sketch debut!
— There seemed to be a big audio glitch at the beginning. Funny to see in hindsight that a sketch that would go on to become such an iconic recurring sketch almost opened with huge technical difficulties.
— Feels fascinating to now look back at this What Up With That debut, back when SNL probably had no idea how huge it would become. I also haven’t watched a What Up With That sketch in literally YEARS, so it’ll be fun to re-live this.
— I love Kenan going into SNL’s audience during his singing just now.
— Speaking of SNL’s audience, actress and future SNL host Saoirse Ronan can be seen in the audience (to Kenan’s right in the sixth above screencap for this sketch).
— Oh, now this sketch has REALLY begun to take off! We get our very first sighting of Jason’s red tracksuit dancing character, the true MVP of these What Up With That sketches (which is saying something).
— Kenan is so damn fantastic in this sketch that he even managed to make his accidental flubbing of his intro of Abby (in her only appearance all night) come off funny instead of cringeworthy. I also like Abby’s facial reaction to that.
— An absolutely classic crazy-eyed look on a now-sweaty Kenan (the ninth above screencap for this sketch) when he’s occasionally rhythmically repeating random key words from what Abby’s saying.
— Damn, this sketch is getting more and more infectiously fun.
— Hilarious walk-on from Gerard as “The Sex-ecutioner”.
— I love Will’s announcer character from earlier in this sketch now walking on while doing The Robot.
— Very fun dance from Kristen.
— Ha, we see our very first instance of Bill’s Lindsay Buckingham getting bumped, which, even in this inaugural What Up With That installment, we’re told happened various times before.
— Overall, what a fucking blast. I’m not sure how I’ll react to the (many) subsequent installments of this sketch in proportion to tonight’s first installment, but this first installment was absolutely perfect to me. I’m sure I’ll find the subsequent installments to be very fun, but probably not quite as magical-feeling as this first installment. We’ll see, though.
— This sketch is said to have been an official huge turning point for Kenan. There was a whole article a few years ago featuring people from SNL talking about how this What Up With That debut was the important moment in which Kenan finally found his voice as an SNL performer, and gradually started to become the reliable SNL veteran he’s considered by many to be today.
STARS: *****


COTTAGE CHEESE IDEAS
new secretary Trina unhelpfully interrupts (host)’s meeting with (JAS)

— (*groan to end of all groans*) Kill me. The second (and thankfully final) appearance of motherfucking Trina, a.k.a. the motherfucking “Thomaaassss!” lady, a character that always induces some of the saltiest, most acid-spewing rants from me that I’ve ever given in any of my reviews in my SNL project. How does SNL follow up the classic debut of What Up With That with THIS?!? Talk about mood whiplash.
— Why does Trina always seem to associate with men named Thomas? At first, I thought Gerard was playing the same Thomas that Steve Martin played last time, who was Trina’s husband, and I assumed we were supposed to ignore the fact that Gerard’s Thomas looks ABSOLUTELY NOTHING like Steve’s Thomas, but then just now, Gerard said something about having hired Trina for this job, which shows that he’s NOT her husband like Steve’s Thomas character was.
— Two-and-a-half minutes into this sketch, and man, what the hell am I watching?!? (*sigh*) It never ceases to amaze me how absolutely barren the material for this god-awful Trina character is. Like I said in my review of the first installment, it feels like they seriously threw Kristen out there with literally NO writing at all, just an annoying quirky character that Kristen (who has gone on record saying she herself hates this Trina character) was forced to awkwardly ad-lib her way through, as if that alone is supposed to carry a 4-minute sketch. And also like I said in my review of the first installment, these sketches are a whole bunch of NOTHINGNESS. It’s a fucking joke that these two Trina sketches ever made it on the air.
— The actual Jason Sudeikis/Gerard Butler pitch meeting portions of this sketch, as brief as they are, seem promising enough to make a sketch of their own, without the mind-numbing Trina stuff.
— As I’ve disclosed in my reviews lately, I’ve recently been starting to surprisingly warm up to some Kristen Wiig characters and impressions who I previously hated the HELL out of (Kathie Lee Gifford, Target Lady, Gilly). Well, that sure as hell ain’t happening with this Trina character.
— I got a genuine laugh just now from Jason beginning a statement to Gerard by asking him “Uh…Thomas, is it?”, after Trina referred to him as Thomas a zillion times throughout the sketch. Unfortunately, the laugh I got from that line of Jason’s still isn’t enough to make up for how awful this sketch in general is.
End my misery, SNL. I am BEGGING you. This sketch is seriously starting to give me a headache. My look while watching this sketch is starting to match how Gerard’s character looks right now (screencap below).

— Ugh. As further proof of how ridiculously lazy the writing of this sketch is, they have Jason, right before leaving, respond to Gerard desperately asking him not to tell anybody about the absurdity he witnessed from Trina by saying “I feel like I will. Just bein’ honest”, which is the EXACT SAME exchange that previously happened between Steve Martin and Casey Wilson in the first installment of this sketch. How are you just going to straight-up reuse that exchange? Man, fuck this sketch.
— What a stupid and lame ending with Gerard and the pen cap. “Ohh. This IS for this!” I bet Gerard felt so dumb having to perform that portion of this sketch (if not the whole sketch).
STARS: * (I wonder if this is the first time in my SNL project that a segment I gave a perfect five-star rating to was immediately followed by a segment I gave a lowest-of-low one-star rating to. I think the closest this happened before is two separate episodes in the late 90s/early 00s era in which a Celebrity Jeopardy sketch I rated five stars was immediately followed by a god-forsaken Pretty Living sketch that I gave a one-and-a-half-star rating to. Right now, Pretty Living is looking almost downright tolerable compared to the Trina dreck I just sat through.)


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “Did It Again”


DAVEHEART
movie chronicles William Wallace’s cowardly brother Daveheart (host)

— Odd how this is the second sketch tonight with the male cast playing a group of soldiers and Gerard playing their leader.
— An okay concept with Gerard as a cowardly version of Braveheart.
— Gerard freaking out over the goat made me laugh, but this sketch in general is starting to feel like it’s running out of steam.
— A surprisingly large amount of live speaking roles tonight for Jenny.
— This sketch continues to run out of steam, as I’m not caring much for the scene with Gerard locked up in chains.
STARS: **


GOODNIGHTS


IMMEDIATE POST-SHOW THOUGHTS
— A strong first half (despite two of those strong sketches being rehashes), but the quality really dropped off in the post-Weekend Update half, aside from an epic debut of What Up With That.


MY PERSONAL CHOICE OF “BEST OF” MOMENTS FOR THIS EPISODE, REPRESENTED WITH SCREENCAPS


RATED SEGMENTS RANKED FROM BEST TO WORST
What Up With That?
Game Time With Randy And Greg
The Rock Obama
Beauty And The Beast
Fuquay Satin’s Grand Hoochie Skank Rosé
Weekend Update
Monologue
Daveheart
300
Cottage Cheese Ideas


HOW THIS EPISODE STACKS UP AGAINST THE PRECEDING ONE (Drew Barrymore)
a mild step up


My full set of screencaps for this episode is here


TOMORROW
Taylor Swift

October 10, 2009 – Drew Barrymore / Regina Spektor (S35 E3)

Segments are rated on a scale of 1-5 stars

OBAMA’S NOBEL PRIZE
Nobel Peace Prize awardee Barack Obama (FRA) adds lottery jackpot to haul

Two President Obama address-to-the-nation cold openings in a row?!? Also, all three of this season’s cold openings so far have featured Fred, by himself (aside from a small walk-on from Kristen in tonight’s cold opening), addressing the nation as someone. Really, SNL?
— A laugh from Kristen’s smile fading in response to Fred-as-Obama’s lighthearted comment about how easily he won the lottery before her on his first try.
— I found this overall opener to be pretty boring, and I feel it’s two steps back in SNL’s portrayal of Obama, after the refreshing take they had of him in the preceding episode.
STARS: **


MONOLOGUE
recordings of host’s thespian ancestors indicate a shared verbal cadence

— I like that we’re shown a photo of a 7-year-old Drew Barrymore from the goodnights of her 1982 episode (the second above screencap for this monologue), and it’s also nice seeing within that photo Tim Kazurinsky, a young Julia Louis-Dreyfus, and the jaw of Gary Kroeger. Seeing this photo takes me back to when I was covering that early 80s era earlier in this SNL project of mine.
— Drew announces that she’s hosted more than any other woman in SNL history.
— Good way to reprise Kristen’s spot-on Drew Barrymore impression from a Prince Show sketch back in Kristen’s first season.
— A fairly fun concept with every movie clip featuring a cast member playing a similarly-voiced thespian ancestor of Drew’s, including Abby getting to do the Drew Barrymore impression that she’s had in her repertoire before SNL. This monologue feels a bit like a variation of the Walken Family Reunion sketch.
STARS: ***


GILLY
Italian foreign-exchange student Gigli (host) & Gilly are kindred spirits

— Where are the glasses that Will’s character wore in previous installments of this sketch?
— Speaking of Will, not counting the Gilly Christmas special from later this season, this is the last time we’ll be seeing him play this character (often cited as one of the very few saving graces of these Gilly sketches). All future installments of this sketch are after Will’s departure, and each have a different teacher.
— Gilly now has a title screen shown at the end of her theme song.
— Continuing the trend of me recently starting to warm up to some Kristen Wiig characters and impressions that I previously hated for the longest time (Kathie Lee Gifford, Target Lady), I’ve actually been finding Gilly less and less annoying with each passing sketch she appears in, believe it or not. I’m still not all that crazy about her, but she’s harmless enough, I guess. The structure of these sketches is still a problem for me, though, because it’s way too redundant.
— I don’t care much for Abby’s mugging at the end of every one her lines. Also, that mugging facial expression she keeps making strangely kinda reminds me of Melanie Hutsell. That makes this another comparison I’ve made between Abby and Melanie’s SNL tenures in my reviews.
— I actually kinda laughed at the twist with Gilly making Drew’s Gigli character explode.
STARS: **½


CELEBRITY GHOST STORIES
Matthew McConaughey (Justin Long) among spooked stars

— I always like Andy’s Billy Bob Thornton impression.
— Very funny Anna Faris impression from Abby. I also love the little detail of her wearing the same dress the real Anna Faris wore in her SNL monologue the preceding season (side-by-side comparison below).

— I shouldn’t be surprised, but man, Drew’s attempt at a Sharon Osbourne impression is AWFUL.
— Justin Long, who Drew was going out with at this time, makes a cameo doing a good-though-cliched Matthew McConaughey impression. That makes this season 3-for-3 in the host bringing along their celebrity boyfriend/girlfriend in a cameo. I wonder if that’s a record.
— Nasim’s brief Charlyne Yi appearance at the end of this sketch is hilarious.
STARS: ***


UNIVERSITY OF WESTFIELD
University Of Westfield Online alums are advised to elide alma mater

— For the first time since the sketch where she notoriously dropped an accidental F-bomb two episodes prior, Jenny finally gets dialogue, though, of course, it’s in a pre-taped commercial. Her only live appearance in tonight’s episode, as a prostitute (*groan*) in Drew’s monologue, had her with no lines, making this the SECOND consecutive episode in which Jenny has no dialogue in any of her live appearances. Like I said in my last episode review, I don’t think that’s a coincidence on SNL’s part.
— Funny concept to this commercial, and it’s being well-executed.
— Jenny’s delivery is actually solid in this, and is providing some of the best parts of this commercial, especially her ending line.
STARS: ***½


LA RIVISTA DELLA TELEVISIONE CON VINNY VEDECCI
Vinny Vedecci hopes host will flash him

— I was about to say it feels odd seeing a female guest in a Vinny Vedecci talk show sketch for once, but then I remembered the very first Vinny Vedecci talk show sketch had a female guest (Julia Louis-Dreyfus).
— Man, these sketches have GOT to stop opening the same way every single time, with the guest saying they don’t speak Italian, leading to an argument between Vinny Vedecci and Fred’s character.
— Ah, we actually get an acknowledgment of the aforementioned tired formula of the beginning of these sketches, as all the regular characters give a guilty look into the camera after Drew says, in regards to the show’s guests not understanding Italian, “I’m sure this has never happened before.”
— Funny angry outburst from Bobby to Drew.
— A pretty good laugh from Vinny Vedecci, after a distraction, continuing his interview with Drew by saying the completely non-sequitur “Speaking of your breasts…”.
— Very funny when Vedecci is slyly trying to get Drew to reprise her famous “dance on top of the desk and flash the host” move she pulled on Letterman.
STARS: ***½


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “Eet”


WEEKEND UPDATE
James Carville (BIH) criticizes those who criticize Barack Obama

coin-hoarding Scrooge McDuck (ANS) likes the rise in the price of gold

Maya Angelou (KET) reads a poem to dispel false rumors of her death

— Bill’s memorable James Carville impression makes its first regular-episode appearance, though it actually debuted in a Weekend Update Thursday special earlier this season.
— Bill’s performance as Carville is hilarious, and he’s making a lot of funny comments here.
— Interesting idea of having Andy as Scrooge McDuck.
— I love Andy-as-Scrooge-McDuck’s reaction when Seth points out caviar is made out of duck liver.
— Some funny lines from Andy’s Scrooge McDuck.
— After the Scrooge McDuck commentary has ended, I like Seth pointing out in an ad-lib how plastic Scrooge McDuck’s gold coins sound when they land on the desk. I noticed that, too, about the sound.
— Kenan In A Dress alert. (I surprisingly haven’t said that in a long while, despite Kenan not having given up dressing in drag on the show since the last time I used that line.)
— Kenan seems awfully amused during his own commentary. A lot more amused than I am.
STARS: ***


TAMPAX TO THE MAX TOURNAMENT OF CHAMPIONS 1991
Pete Twinkle (JAS) & Greg Stink (WLF) cover 1991 ladies’ billiards match

— The debut of these ESPN Classic sketches with Jason and Will’s Pete Twinkle and Greg Stink characters. We’ll be seeing these sketches A LOT this season.
— Lots of very fun and solid interplay between Jason and Will, especially with the idiocy of Will’s character.
— Jason’s Tampax slogans are getting funnier and funnier as this sketch goes on.
— I got a big laugh from Jason disclosing, regarding what he prefers in a woman, “I like boobs and teeth.”
— Jason: “Tampax – helping you relax when Mother Nature attacks your slacks…(*holds a very long pause while the audience laughs*)…Tampaaaax!”
— Will, regarding how he got this job: “My father works at ESPN, and he pulled some strings.” Jason: “Speaking of pulling some strings, Tampaaaax!” A perfect way to end this sketch.
STARS: ****½


COOKING AL FRESCO WITH FRAN & PHIL
outdoor venue leaves chefs vulnerable to bird attack

— Perfect casting of Bobby as Guy Fieri, and he’s very fun in this sketch.
— Pretty funny elaborate gag with the birds dipping bread into the marinara sauce.
— The constant bird attacks and “Please stand by…” cutaways are getting old.
— Okay, I did get a laugh from the ending bit with Guy Fieri’s falling skeleton. What made that even funnier is the fact that the top half of the skeleton’s skull popped open after landing, which I’m not sure was intentional.
STARS: **


LARRY KING LIVE
panelists discuss where men put their wieners

— I always have a very meh reaction to seeing Fred’s Larry King show up.
— Very lame conceit to this, with professionals constantly using the word “wiener” as a penis euphemism. In hindsight, this is an early example of the unfunny sophomoric humor we’ll unfortunately be seeing quite a bit this season.
— I’m two minutes into this sketch, and none of the wiener stuff has gotten a single laugh from me.
— I finally got a laugh just now, from Jason’s line about how, on the “doing bad stuff with your wiener” scale, Roman Polanski is “a 9, or a European 4”.
— I got a second chuckle just now, from Kristen’s delivery of her line about how she likes comparing herself physically to famous women who have touched wieners.
STARS: *½


BRENDA & SHAUN
venues for performers Brenda (host) & Shaun (FRA) trace downward spiral

— Much like the well-loved Body Fuzion Digital Short from the last episode Drew hosted, we get a Drew Barrymore-starring Digital Short that’s made to look like video from an old, worn-out 1980s VHS tape.
— Fred and Drew’s performer characters showing up at increasingly out-of-place events and annoying people there is pretty funny.
— Funny downward spiral of Fred and Drew’s characters, and how each stage of this downward spiral is being presented in the typical cheery manner that the earlier, lighter-hearted portions of this short were presented in.
— Ha, is the crow that Fred and Drew are eating one of the same crow props from the Cooking Al Fresco sketch from earlier tonight?
— This overall short certainly pales in comparison to Body Fuzion, but it’s absolutely fine on its own.
STARS: ***½


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “The Calculation”


BOOK READING
Hamilton (WLF) crashes (host)’s reading of memoir about her time with him

— After Drew’s book reading at the beginning of this sketch, I like Jason’s slightly passive-aggressive line about how people don’t usually read the entire book at a book reading.
— Will’s Hamilton character, my favorite part of the wedding/funeral speech sketches from the preceding season, has now gotten spun-off into his own sketch.
— Every moment of Hamilton’s dialogue in this sketch is funny.
— Drew: “There are so many things you would have to change, I don’t know where to start.” Hamilton: “Start towards the end.”
— I’m liking all the inexplicable comments about Hamilton’s “good” looks.
— Hamilton: “In the words of the black singer, Usher…”
— Funny turn with Hamilton wooing Drew by singing “In This Club” in his very non-melodic trademark voice.
STARS: ****


GOODNIGHTS


IMMEDIATE POST-SHOW THOUGHTS
— A fairly forgettable episode, but was nowhere near as bad as I had remembered. This episode had more merits than I had recalled, and some of the stuff I hated back when this episode originally aired came off a little better tonight (particularly the Digital Short). That Larry King Live sketch is still fucking terrible, though.


MY PERSONAL CHOICE OF “BEST OF” MOMENTS FOR THIS EPISODE, REPRESENTED WITH SCREENCAPS


RATED SEGMENTS RANKED FROM BEST TO WORST
Tampax To The Max Tournament Of Champions 1991
Book Reading
University of Westfield
La Rivista Della Televisione con Vinny Vedecci
Brenda & Shaun
Celebrity Ghost Stories
Monologue
Weekend Update
Gilly
Cooking Al Fresco with Fran & Phil
Obama’s Nobel Prize
Larry King Live


HOW THIS EPISODE STACKS UP AGAINST THE PRECEDING ONE (Ryan Reynolds)
a step down


My full set of screencaps for this episode is here


TOMORROW
Gerard Butler

October 3, 2009 – Ryan Reynolds / Lady Gaga (S35 E2)

Segments are rated on a scale of 1-5 stars

OBAMA’S CHECKLIST
Barack Obama (FRA) defends himself by pointing to lack of accomplishments

— Wow, Fred’s already-mediocre President Obama impression has somehow gotten EVEN WORSE. Aside from a few occasional (very occasional) vocal mannerisms, Fred’s not even ATTEMPTING to sound like Obama tonight. He’s basically just speaking in his normal voice and pitch. Usually when he plays Obama, he at least deepens his vocal pitch somewhat (but nowhere near enough to match the real Obama’s deep voice).
— When this originally aired, there was a huge shock among online SNL fans that SNL, after long being accused of coming off way too supportive of and easygoing on Obama in their sketches about him, was actually taking a lot of shots at Obama and criticizing his presidency in this cold opening. This decision of SNL’s got good praise among those shocked SNL fans.
— This cold opening’s jabs at Obama are coming off funny and well-executed. Good enough for me to now even ignore the non-attempt Fred is making at sounding like Obama. In fact, something about Fred’s non-impression is actually strangely working for me in this context. It fits the laid-back tone of this cold opening’s conceit.
— Pretty funny bit with the “Chicago 2016” shirts.
— Fred’s Obama, during his discussion of his accomplishments as president: “I’m seeing two big accomplishments: jack and squat.”
— Overall, I feel this was EASILY one of the better Fredbama sketches. Too bad this new angle SNL found on Obama would not last, and the show would soon go back to their usual soft, boring, non-comical take on him.
STARS: ***½


OPENING MONTAGE
— Two changes have been made to the new opening montage that was introduced in the preceding episode: 1) the single shot shown of Kristen Wiig in the preceding episode’s montage is now bookended by two shots of her in a hallway, the first shot of which she’s posing for the camera in a model-like manner, and the other shot of which she’s leaning against the hallway walls while laughing. 2) The way the musical guest and host’s respective photo is displayed has been changed from being displayed as a full-screen photo to being displayed as a smaller photo in front of a live-action NYC backdrop.


MONOLOGUE
host shows the difference between romantic comedies & superhero movies

— I’m really liking Ryan Reynolds’ delivery here.
— Some okay laughs from Ryan demonstrating the various differences between superhero movies and rom-com movies.
STARS: ***


MOSTLY GARBAGE DOG FOOD
(JAS) figures Mostly Garbage dog food is good enough for his pet pooch

— Funny concept.
— As usual, very strong spokesman performance from Jason, who’s perfect for the concept of this particular ad. I can also imagine Will Ferrell pulling this off, probably because he starred in a few dog commercials kinda like this back in the day, such as Petchow Rat Poison.
— Funny story from Jason regarding his reaction to once finding his dog eating cat poop out of the litter box.
STARS: ***½


CELEBRITY FAMILY FEUD
incest subtext affects John (BIH) & Mackenzie (KRW) Phillips

— Feels a little odd in hindsight seeing a Celebrity Family Feud sketch that’s set in the past and is hosted by someone OTHER THAN Kenan’s Steve Harvey, given the recurring Celebrity Family Feud sketches SNL would later do in more recent years.
— During the opening “Next on the Game Show Network…” bumper sequence, the “Feud” in “Celebrity Family Feud” is misspelled “Fued” (screencap below). Kinda surprised a noticeable typo like that got past SNL’s editors.

— When this originally aired, I remember how surprising a lot of SNL fans, including myself, found it that SNL had the guts to spoof such a touchy and controversial topical news story.
— The casting of Kristen as Mackenzie Phillips and Nasim Pedrad as the mother of Mackenzie, Genevieve Phillips, feels like it should’ve been the other way around, because in this sketch, Kristen looks noticeably a lot older than Nasim, and it’s hard for me to buy Kristen as Nasim’s daughter in this, and thus, also makes it a little hard for me to buy Kristen as Bill’s daughter. Back when this originally aired, I recall taking this miscasting as both a sign of SNL’s continued Wiig favoritism and a sign that they probably didn’t want to give this sketch’s important role of Mackenzie Phillips to a mere featured player (which all of Kristen’s female castmates this season are). 11 years later, I’m now questioning if that assumption of mine was fair or not.
— A huge laugh from Bill-as-John-Phillips immediately answering, in a wide-eyed manner, “Secrets!”, during the “Things you keep for a long time” question.
— I’m not too familiar with Richard Dawson, but Jason seems to be doing a very specific impression in his portrayal of Dawson. Whether it’s accurate or not, I’m loving Jason’s performance. Nice to see him fairly prominent so far in tonight’s episode, by the way, given how ridiculously underused he surprisingly was in the preceding week’s season premiere.
— When Jason’s Dawson gives Kristen’s Mackenzie a kiss on the cheek, I love Bill’s John reacting to that with a lighthearted “Heeeyyyy, careful now.”
— When Jason’s Dawson asks Abby’s Marie Osmond and Kristen’s Mackenzie the topic “Things you do with your father”, the cutaway to Bill-as-John’s silent facial reaction is very funny.
— I can see and understand why some people might be bothered by this sketch, but the sketch is definitely working for me.
— Great tense response from Jason’s Dawson, when finally catching on to what’s going on between John and Mackenzie Phillips: “Ohhhhh. Okay, I got it. Okay, this episode’s over.”
STARS: ****


ON THE GROUND
misguided rebel (ANS) smashes objects; Elijah Wood cameo

— Yet another all-time memorable music video Digital Short from Lonely Island.
— Hilarious comedic conceit to this song, made even funnier by Andy’s angry singing and his over-the-top facial expressions when throwing things to the ground in slow-motion.
— I love Andy’s whiny constant delivery of “Maaaaaaaaaan!” throughout this.
— This is getting increasingly hilarious. The “My dad’s not a phone!” part in particular is having me practically rolling on the floor.
— Andy, regarding a kid offering him a piece of birthday cake: “Whatchu want me to do with this cake, eat it?!? HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO THE GROUND!”
— Man, this short is so damn epic.
— A huge laugh from Andy, OUT OF FUCKING NOWHERE, flipping over the restaurant table that “phonies” Ryan Reynolds and Elijah Wood are eating at.
STARS: *****


MIKE’S FOUNTAINRY
Mike’s Fountainry extends classy brand of Lexi’s dad’s Chandelier Galaxy

— Our third installment of this series of sketches.
— A sudden-but-plausible Scarlett Johansson walk-on, reprising her character from all previous installments of this sketch. At this time, she and Ryan Reynolds were either dating or married (I forget which, much like Megan Fox and Brian Austin Green’s relationship that I mentioned being unsure about in my last episode review), which explains her cameo (and the special flattering mention Ryan gives her during the goodnights at the end of this episode). This season is now 2-for-2 in the host bringing along their celebrity boyfriend/girlfriend in a cameo.
— I will say that Scarlett always sells her character in this recurring sketch well.
— I really like Ryan’s performance here. There’s something strangely kinda Will Ferrell-esque about his performance, especially the big, out-of-breath gasp he does when he’s finished with his speech.
STARS: ***


DEEP HOUSE DISH
musical guest & Madonna [real] get in a cat fight

— The first appearance this recurring sketch has made in a year…and even THAT appearance from a year ago was the sketch’s first appearance in over a year. This sketch is clearly being phased out. In fact, tonight’s installment ends up being the final one.
— For once, Andy’s T-Shane is already on the set while Kenan’s D.J. Dynasty Handbag is delivering his usual opening intro of the show into the camera.
— The echo mic bit with T-Shane made me laugh.
— Catchy melody to Kristen’s song.
— Speaking of catchy, I like the chorus part of Ryan’s “Danny McCooz Is…” Facebook song.
— I gotta say, I’m very surprised by how much I’m actually enjoying this Deep House Dish installment so far, given how I usually dislike these sketches. Maybe the year-long absences this sketch has been taking lately has done it some good.
— Not only do we have our obligatory Lady Gaga appearance, who’s obviously the reason why this recurring sketch was brought out of the mothballs tonight, but we surprisingly get a Madonna cameo with her.
— Despite the novelty of seeing Lady Gaga and Madonna interact with each other, I’m not caring much for the whole rivalry bit they’re doing in this sketch.
— Well, because of this sketch, Kenan Thompson can say he got the honor of being kissed by Madonna and Lady Gaga simultaneously, on opposite sides of his face. This Madonna/Lady Gaga/D.J. Dynasty Handbag kissing orgy eventually gets joined by T-Shane, closing out this sketch. What a wild and amusing way to end this recurring sketch’s run.
STARS: *** (I’m just as surprised as you are)


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “Paparazzi”


WEEKEND UPDATE
Arnold Schwarzenegger (DAH) will not defend Roman Polanski’s actions

Charles Barkley (KET) offers skewed observations on China’s 60th birthday

Mahmoud Ahmadinejad’s (FRA) fiesty wife (NAP) makes fun of him in English

— The recently-departed-from-SNL Darrell Hammond makes his first of several regular-episode cameos this season. He previously cameod in all three Weekend Update Thursday specials that aired earlier this season. With all of these cameos Darrell had been making around this time, I remember joking to myself back then that Darrell’s appearing more than he did in his final season as an actual cast member! (Actually, that’s probably not an exaggeration.)
— Never liked Darrell’s Ahnuld impression.
— While I’m not caring all that much for some of his dialogue in this Ahnuld commentary, Darrell’s big energy is making it fun, which is something I’m not used to saying these past few seasons, given Darrell’s perpetual sluggish, low-energy performances in his later seasons as a cast member.
— I like how Kenan’s Charles Barkley is constantly referring to Seth as “Screech”.
— The usual hilarious absurd dialogue from Kenan’s Barkley all throughout his commentary.
— The Barkley commentary is an early display of Seth laughing his way through a guest’s commentary, which, IIRC, would go on to be a semi-regular thing when he interacts with certain Update guests.
— Seth’s “Eeyore finally did it” joke is one of his most memorable Update jokes of all time.
— Seth has some really strong jokes tonight in general.
— After spending her (official) first episode the preceding week being practically invisible and having no lines whatsoever, Nasim Pedrad gets her first big showcase.
— Nasim is immediately coming off so well in this first showcase of hers. Very strong and fun performance from her.
— This Mr. & Mrs. Ahmadinejad commentary is utilizing Fred’s Mahmoud Ahmadinejad much better than that weak Update commentary he and Maya Rudolph (as Mahmoud’s translator) did two seasons prior.
— Very solid Update overall. Best one in a while, in my opinion.
STARS: ****


SO YOU COMMITTED A CRIME & YOU THINK YOU CAN DANCE
cons do reality show

— Interesting concept for a So You Think You Can Dance parody.
— Boy, that scowl Abby’s making as Nancy Grace is almost downright scary-looking.
— Hilarious visual of Bill as Phil Spector.
— Will makes his ONLY appearance of this entire episode in a non-speaking role in a post-Weekend Update sketch. A sad sign of things to come for his airtime in this final season of his. That being said, even in a silent role, he’s killing it in this sketch, fittingly playing a character who we’re told looks like a sex offender.
— In hindsight, it feels kinda odd seeing Will and Nasim interacting with each other, knowing this is Will’s final season and Nasim’s first. Off the top of my head, I can’t think of many other interactions between them this season.
— Some good laughs from Fred’s constant attempts to escape during his and Kristen’s dance rehearsal.
— I love the visual of Jason as a cop handcuffed to Fred and sternly staring him down during his and Kristen’s dance sequence.
— Then-new SNL writer and future cast member Mike O’Brien (credited at this time in SNL’s writing credits as Michael Patrick O’Brien) makes his first onscreen SNL appearance, playing a stage manager whispering into Andy-as-Kevin-Federline’s ear (the ninth above screencap for this sketch).
— Jenny Slate makes her first live sketch appearance since her notorious accidental F-bomb in the preceding episode…and, as no surprise, she has NO dialogue here, nor anywhere else in tonight’s episode. I don’t think that’s a coincidence.
— Kenan’s mentally disturbed character is very funny. I also love Ryan’s various reactions to him.
— An overall fun sketch with a lot of laughs.
STARS: ****


INTERNATIONAL MASTERWORKS
Norway doesn’t capture spirit of USA cop drama

— Bill’s a tad stumbly in his opening intro.
— Funny concept with Norwegian actors’ bad attempts at casual English speaking and American accents.
— For some reason, Andy’s “Do you want me to strike him with a knuckle sandwich?” line has stuck with me over the years.
— I can see why some people would find this to be another typical “Fred does an annoying voice” sketch, but, despite the sketch’s thinness, I’m finding it to be decent enough.
STARS: ***


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs a medley of her hits


BACKSTAGE
backstage, ANS & musical guest are wearing the same bubble outfit

— Nice to see a non-monologue backstage sketch, which feels rare to me at this point of SNL’s run.
— Big night for Andy. He’s been all over this episode, especially the post-Weekend Update half.
— Amusing visual of Andy and Lady Gaga both wearing the same bubble dress.
— Fun gag with Gaga and Andy’s constant failed attempts to kiss each other over the bubbles on their costumes.
— Funny ending with Lorne’s bubble tie.
— Overall, short and sweet.
STARS: ***½


GOODNIGHTS


IMMEDIATE POST-SHOW THOUGHTS
— A solid episode with a smooth-sailing feel, a huge improvement over the mediocre season premiere. This episode flowed really well, with absolutely no segments I disliked. Hell, this episode was so good that, for once, even a Fredbama cold opening and freakin’ Deep House Dish worked for me. I’m not an avid listener of Lady Gaga’s music, but even her special medley during her second musical performance in this episode caught my attention and fascinated me, especially in how much it felt like a mini-concert.


MY PERSONAL CHOICE OF “BEST OF” MOMENTS FOR THIS EPISODE, REPRESENTED WITH SCREENCAPS


RATED SEGMENTS RANKED FROM BEST TO WORST
On The Ground
Celebrity Family Feud
So You Committed A Crime & You Think You Can Dance
Weekend Update
Obama’s Checklist
Mostly Garbage Dog Food
Backstage
Mike’s Fountainry
Deep House Dish
Monologue
International Masterworks


HOW THIS EPISODE STACKS UP AGAINST THE PRECEDING ONE (Megan Fox)
a big step up


My full set of screencaps for this episode is here


TOMORROW
Drew Barrymore hosts for her sixth and, as of 2020, final time

September 26, 2009 – Megan Fox / U2 (S35 E1)

Segments are rated on a scale of 1-5 stars

UNITED NATIONS GENERAL ASSEMBLY
Moammar Gadhafi (FRA) blames rambling United Nations speech on jet lag

— Odd how the typical opening C-SPAN announcer isn’t being played by Jim Downey for once. It sounds like new cast member Nasim Pedrad who’s doing the voice of the announcer.
— Oh, god. SNL opens this season with a freakin’ translator cold opening? Really, SNL?
— Ugh. I’m only a minute-and-a-half into this, and I’m already tired of this. So far, this has been featuring the usual tepid, rambly (even if the rambling is the point of this particular opening), overly-wordy material that Jim Downey-written translator opening cold openings in the 2000s feature.
— I admit, some of Fred’s exaggerated facial expressions are making me laugh in spite of myself.
— Overall, a poor way to kick off the new season. In hindsight, knowing how this season goes (hint: not well), I guess this was a fitting way to open it.
STARS: *½


OPENING MONTAGE
— New montage.

— Right after the SNL logo is shown, it’s followed by a “35 years” graphic, commemorating the show’s milestone 35th season. This milestone would also be commemorated in some of this season’s going-to-commercial and coming-back-from-commercial bumpers, showing an “SNL 35” logo.
— When this season premiere originally aired, I remember how jarring Will Forte’s new buzzcut hairstyle was. That took some getting used to. I recall hearing that the reason for this buzzcut of Will’s was because, when filming the MacGruber movie in a very hot location in the desert over the summer, Will constantly got so sweaty that he eventually just shaved off all of his hair to reduce his sweating. We’ll be seeing his hair gradually grow back over the course of this season. By the way, seeing Will’s buzzcut always reminds me that this ends up being his final season as a cast member. I recall his airtime sadly being scarce this season compared to his prior seasons.
— A lot of fun and memorable shots of the cast in this opening montage, such as a laughing Andy Samberg celebrating with a group of Asian businessmen, Jason Sudeikis playing basketball with friends and throwing a towel at the camera, Kenan Thompson (with his trademark big smile) high-fiving a passing-by bicyclist, and Bobby Moynihan touching a police officer’s badge in an overly fascinated manner.
— Nasim Pedrad and Jenny Slate have been added to the cast tonight.


MONOLOGUE
host assumes her naked headswap photos must be legit since they’re online

— Some meh and lazy “dumb bimbo” humor with Megan Fox’s reactions to “real” nude pictures of her.
— Ah, here comes Bobby. He seems like he’s going to salvage this monologue.
— I love the sly look Bobby gives into the camera when mentioning his home scanner.
— A funny centaur poster Bobby has of Megan.
— I kinda wanted Bobby’s scene to last longer, as I was surprised by how soon he exited. However, at least SNL got this overall monologue over with quickly, given the scant premise.
STARS: **½


BLADDIVAN
Bladdivan cures shy bladder with a mix of diuretic & anti-anxiety drugs

— A questionable premise for a season-opening commercial, especially since it feels like SNL has already gone to this particular “urine medication commercial” well several times before (including the Urigro commercial from just three seasons prior to this, which has a premise almost completely identical to this one).
— I love Bill’s delivery in his testimonial.
— Very funny testimonial from Jason.
— Didn’t care for the sharing-a-urinal gag with Fred and Will at the end, but I did like them both cheesily laughing into the camera while sharing the urinal.
STARS: **½


FLIGHT ANNOUNCEMENT
stewardesses’ (KRW) & (host) increasingly-dire announcements induce panic

— I like how the lead-off sketch of this season is actually an original, non-recurring, and non-TV show sketch.
— Hannibal Burress, hired as a new SNL writer this season, can be seen all throughout this sketch seated next to Bobby (he’s behind Andy and Abby in the third above screencap for this sketch).
— Kristen and Megan’s overly calm announcements of VERY worrisome things about this flight are getting increasingly funny.
— The bit regarding the Monk nickname Kristen gives Megan is cracking me up.
STARS: ***½


RUSSIAN BRIDES
(WLF) weighs pretty (host) & ugly (FRA) Russian mail-order brides’ merits

— Oh, no. Yet another damn Fred-in-drag showcase. This also serves as an unfortunate reminder that, with the start of this season, we’ve entered what are known by a number of online SNL fans as Fred’s official bad years: seasons 35-38. (The number of annoying things Fred did in the preceding season, season 34, almost has me wondering if we should count THAT as the official start of Fred’s bad years.)
— At least Will’s character is acknowledging how unattractive Fred’s character is. I was worried this sketch would go for the obvious, cliched joke by having Will feel that Fred’s character is just as attractive as Megan’s character.
— Odd how not only is this the second sketch tonight with Fred playing a foreign-speaking person having his speech translated, but it’s Bill translating his speech in both sketches.
— (*groan*) Now Fred’s character is singing.
STARS: *


THE DATE
nebbishy SWAT leader (WLF) rejects (host)’s marriage proposal

— I can’t help but feel bad for laughing at Will’s performance, because he’s kinda coming off like he’s portraying a realistically mentally challenged person, though I don’t think that’s intentional. But screw it, Will is damn funny in this.
— A good laugh from Will’s “No (*bleep*)in’ way” response to Megan’s marriage proposal to him, after all of that build-up prior to this.
STARS: ***½


GRADY WILSON’S BURNING UP THE BEDSHEETS
(host) joins Grady Wilson for his Burning Up The Bedsheets sex DVD

— This Grady Wilson bit has officially become recurring.
— The “Speaking in Tongues” sex move made me laugh out loud.
— Most of tonight’s Grady Wilson sex moves aren’t making me laugh nearly as hard as the ones from the first installment of this sketch did, but they’re still fairly funny.
— Decent addition of Megan to help Kenan’s Grady Wilson demonstrate his sex techniques (and to help keep this sketch fresh), though part of me can’t help but wonder if this sketch is just a thinly-veiled excuse for Kenan to get to do a whole bunch of sex moves with Megan Fox. (If so, hey, I can’t blame Kenan.)
— I don’t like how this is the second sketch tonight with a Megan Fox-played character responding to someone’s simple joke by saying a clueless “I don’t get it.” SNL is leaning way too heavily into the lazy “attractive female host plays a dumb bimbo” trope tonight. I know Megan Fox isn’t exactly known for her acting range or comedic skills, but come on.
STARS: ***


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “Breathe”


WEEKEND UPDATE
the G-20 Summit prompts Jean K. Jean to make a few comedic observations

nervous-as-usual Judy Grimes still fails to relay any travel advice

— Some minor changes have been made to the Weekend Update set. The Update desk’s top is now brown instead of blue, the words “Weekend Update” on the front of the desk are now in light-up letters, and the brown wooden panel on the lower half of the background wall has been removed, making the blue map background now cover the entire wall. (side-by-side comparison below between how the Update set looked previously and how it looks tonight)

— As usual for Jean K. Jean’s commentaries, I like the jokes and Kenan’s fun performance, but could really do without those formulaic dance interludes.
— A particularly funny line from Jean K. Jean about how, with those Jheri curls, Moammar Gadhafi’s name should be Moammar DeBarge.
— Now we get a Judy Grimes commentary. While I like both Jean K. Jean and Judy Grimes (much more than I liked them back when this SNL era originally aired), these are extremely formulaic characters who do the same basic bit in each appearance. I understand SNL wants to display some audience favorites in the Weekend Update of tonight’s season premiere, but can I get at least ONE new Update guest tonight?
— Hmm, an interesting change of pace with Judy Grimes actually bringing out a chart.
— Meh, even with the change of pace with Grimes bringing out a chart, it goes in the direction you’d expect it to, with her saying nothing but several “Just kidding”s when explaining the chart.
STARS: ***


LIVE LOUNGE
Live Lounge phone chat line is populated by all sorts of unsexy oddballs

— Funny opening line from Megan about how, despite her hair and clothes, this commercial is meant to air in 2009.
— Nasim Pedrad makes her second of only two appearances tonight, both of which were non-speaking roles, one in which she was barely onscreen (in the Flight Announcement sketch, in which she sat next to an also-silent Jenny Slate), and the other (this sketch) in which she’s shown for a mere two seconds listening to someone on her phone while having a big cheesy smile on her face. Yeesh, an extremely quiet way to make an SNL debut. (Then again, after a certain infamous thing that Nasim’s fellow newbie Jenny Slate does later tonight that would get so much unwanted attention, maybe Nasim breathed a sigh of relief that she went under the radar with just a quiet, invisible debut.) Then again, Nasim technically already made her very first SNL appearance prior to this episode. You see, in a Weekend Update Thursday special that aired two days before this season premiere, Nasim made a small appearance in that special’s cold opening, in a scene in which she, as Kathy Griffin, is interviewing Fred’s President Obama. (My memory of that cold opening is very fuzzy, so I’m not sure if my details are fully accurate.) When the camera first showed Nasim in that cold opening, I remember confusedly asking myself “Who the heck is THAT???” before realizing that must be one of the two new girls who SNL hired for this season. I find it kinda odd how SNL would have Nasim make her (unofficial, I guess) SNL debut in a Weekend Update Thursday special, before audiences got an introduction to her by seeing her and her name in the opening montage of a regular SNL episode. (SNL’s Weekend Update Thursday specials don’t have cast credits in the opening montage.)
— Jason makes his ONLY live appearance of this entire episode in a non-speaking, two-second role in which he, similar to Nasim, is shown listening to someone on his phone while having a cheesy cross-eyed look on his face. The hell? Having that be your biggest live appearance of the night makes sense for a new featured player like Nasim, but for a reliable, well-liked SNL veteran like Jason?!? And in a season premiere, of all episodes?!?
— Very funny how, after we’re shown “Women who want to be murdered” as an example of a chat line user, the next example of a chat line user is “Murderers”.
— Bill’s frozen facial expression in his shot is pure comedy gold.
— Funny mention of David Duchovny at the end.
— Amusing ending disclaimer.
— A surprisingly short overall sketch.
STARS: ***½


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “Moment Of Surrender”


BIKER CHICK CHAT
tough broad Dawn (JES) expresses strong emotions

— Hooooooo, boy. Welp, here we are, folks. The sketch that contains the notorious moment of both this episode and Jenny Slate’s entire short-lived SNL tenure.
— Pretending that I don’t know what notorious thing is soon going to happen, it’s nice to see Jenny getting her own lead role in her very first episode. Too bad it has to be a talk show sketch, such a lazy, tired, and overused SNL format.
— OHHH, NO. There’s the notorious moment, just a minute into this sketch: at one point during her delivery of a spiel that constantly uses the word “frickin’” as a substitute for “fuckin’” (a running theme among all the characters’ dialogue in this sketch), Jenny accidentally lets an actual “fuckin’” slip in. (Very similar to a gaffe Paul Shaffer made when doing a season 5 sketch in which he was constantly supposed to use the word “floggin’” in place of “fuckin’”.) Jenny immediately realizes this error, and, right before the camera cuts to a close-up of Kristen, Jenny follows that botched line of hers by making an “Uh-oh!” face that involves her puffing out her cheeks (the fifth above screencap for this sketch), a visual that would gain unwanted immortal fame, as screencaps and GIFs of Jenny making that face would be frequently used over the following few weeks on online message board threads (including on some non-SNL message boards) that discussed this F-bomb of Jenny’s.
— When I watched this episode when it originally aired, I actually didn’t catch the F-bomb. I did, however, notice Jenny making that aforementioned cheeks-puffed-out face right before the camera cut to a close-up of Kristen, and I was very puzzled over why the hell Jenny randomly made that face, then I figured that must’ve just been her mugging the camera in a desperate attempt to be funny. It wasn’t until right after this sketch ended and I went onto the now-defunct saturday-night-live.com message board to read what people were saying about this just-aired sketch that I found out Jenny let an F-bomb slip out. (Speaking of that message board’s live discussion of Jenny’s F-bomb, as I mentioned in my review of the notorious Ashlee Simpson incident from the season 30 Jude Law episode, there were so many people who simultaneously flocked to that message board immediately after Jenny’s F-bomb that it eventually caused the board to crash for a short while.) Literally as soon as I read about the F-bomb, I immediately grabbed my remote control, rewound my live DVR to see where the F-bomb happened in this sketch, and when I saw it, you can probably imagine how much I was absolutely floored.
— Man, to have a gaffe like this happen in your first big showcase in your FIRST EPISODE? Yikes! When Jenny, in character, is speaking into the camera several seconds after the infamous moment, you can tell she’s gotten REALLY thrown off by her F-bomb, because she’s suddenly speaking awkwardly and haltingly during this part. I can just hear the poor girl panicking inside her head during this portion of the sketch, thinking stuff to herself such as “I am soooooo getting fired after this sketch!”
— The comedic conceit of this sketch itself, with all the generic badass attitudes, all the “frickin’”s, and all the ashtray-throwings, has gotten REALLY old. The unscripted F-bomb is sadly the only interesting thing about this sketch.
— Finally a funny line, when Kristen mentions her “front bum”.
— A few minutes into this sketch, and I’m noticing that Kristen’s the ONLY thing in this sketch getting any big reactions from the audience. This sketch is a whole lot of nothing.
— Overall……..so, THAT’S over, mercifully. Yeesh. I hate to say it, but Jenny’s F-bomb may have been a blessing in disguise, as it’s probably what prevented SNL from ever turning this waste of time into a recurring talk show sketch (if the lack of audience reaction didn’t already do that). And, F-bomb aside, I didn’t find this material to be a promising first showcase for Jenny at all, sad to say.
— After this episode’s original airing, during the MANY online discussions of Jenny’s F-bomb, a lot of people wondered if SNL would immediately fire her after just one episode. There was even one person in those online discussions who displayed a comical self-made t-shirt that had the words “Jennifer Slate: 2009-2009” (insinuating that her SNL tenure would not last beyond her first episode) under a photo of Jenny making the aforementioned cheeks-puffed-out face. As we know now, Jenny would keep her job after this (if only for one season). Even today, 11 years later, I still see people online ignorantly assuming Jenny got fired after one season just because of her F-bomb from her first episode.
STARS: *½


MEGAN’S ROOMMATE
Optimus Prime (BOM) & Bumblebee (Brian Austin Green) hang out

Two officially-billed Digital Shorts tonight. I always love the rare times that happens in an episode.
— A good laugh from Andy and Megan walking in on Bobby’s Optimus Prime sitting completely bottomless on the couch.
— Despite some laughs I’m getting, something about this short feels kinda underwhelming to me. It has a fairly forgettable feel for Lonely Island standards. I do like Andy’s straight man performance, though.
— I like the use of the original Transformers theme song during the ending credits sequence, as it brings back childhood memories of watching the original Transformers series.
— During the aforementioned ending credits sequence, the mysterious performer playing Bumblebee removes his mask and reveals that he’s the one and only Brian Austin Green, who Megan was either dating or married to (I forget which) at this time. To quote my reaction to finding out the guy behind the Bumblebee mask was Brian Austin Green when I originally reviewed this episode back in 2009: “Ugh. He should’ve kept the mask *on*.” Also, the previous time Brian Austin Green cameod on SNL before this (a laughably bad and pointless cameo that initially received DEAD SILENCE from the audience) in an O.J. Simpson Trial sketch, not only was it ALSO a season premiere just like tonight’s episode happens to be, but it was the premiere of a very notorious season (1994-95). And, wouldn’t you know it, season 35, while certainly not notorious, ends up being a season of pretty poor quality. So, I have to ask, is there some kind of Brian Austin Green SNL curse? Does SNL have a bad season every time he cameos in a season premiere? We’d better hope he doesn’t make any more cameos in any future season premieres. (Not that I see any reason why he would anyway, if his career has gone as south as I think it has.)
STARS: **½


YOUR MOM TALKS TO MEGAN FOX WHILE YOU GET READY
host’s friend’s mom (KRW) engages her in small talk while folding laundry

— Hmm. Interesting concept.
— When this originally aired, I dismissed this as a typical Wiig showcase that proved even further that SNL was pushing Kristen as their designated star, but during my current viewing, I can see more what this this sketch is going for, and I’m enjoying it. In fact, there’s actually a slice-of-life aspect to this that I really appreciate, as it’s VERY rare to see slice-of-life pieces by this point of SNL’s run.
— Solid and reliable delivery from Kristen throughout this.
— Actually a sweet bit of advice Kristen cornily gives Megan at the end.
STARS: ***½


GOODNIGHTS
musical guest performs “Ultraviolet”

— At the beginning of these goodnights, before U2’s show-closing musical performance starts, we get a fairly memorable visual of Seth tightly hugging Jenny in the background (seen in the first above screencap for these goodnights), obviously consoling her after her huge gaffe earlier tonight. I shudder to imagine what poor Jenny’s reaction to her gaffe must’ve been when she was backstage after the Biker Chick Chat sketch.


IMMEDIATE POST-SHOW THOUGHTS
— A pretty mediocre season premiere, and already a sign of the quality that I’m aware in hindsight this season will have (though I know a season premiere is rarely an accurate sign of how the rest of a season will turn out). The first half of this episode in particular was dominated by a lot of laziness, with another bad translator cold opening, a “dumb bimbo” monologue, another urine medication commercial, and another bad Fred-Armisen-in-drag sketch. The second half of the episode wasn’t too hot, either. There were still some good things in this overall episode, but nothing received a rating over a mere three-and-a-half stars from me.


MY PERSONAL CHOICE OF “BEST OF” MOMENTS FOR THIS EPISODE, REPRESENTED WITH SCREENCAPS

 


RATED SEGMENTS RANKED FROM BEST TO WORST
The Date
Your Mom Talks To Megan Fox While You Get Ready
Live Lounge
Flight Announcement
Grady Wilson’s Burning Up The Bedsheets
Weekend Update
Megan’s Roommate
Bladdivan
Monologue
United Nations General Assembly
Biker Chick Chat
Russian Brides


HOW THIS EPISODE STACKS UP AGAINST THE PRECEDING SEASON (2008-09)
a big step down


My full set of screencaps for this episode is here


TOMORROW
Ryan Reynolds