Segments are rated on a scale of 1-5 stars
OVAL OFFICE
Donald Trump’s (Alec Baldwin) hostile phone calls alienate world leaders
— The first appearance of Alec Baldwin’s Trump as president.
— I did laugh at Baldwin-as-Trump’s first “Australia sucks, etc., prepare to go to war” line over the phone, though they end up making that a mantra of this cold opening.
— A huge laugh from the “Guy who pays for the wall says what?” “Que?” bit between Alec and Alex.
— The second consecutive cold opening with a Weekend Update character/impression of Kate’s (though this isn’t the first time her Angela Merkel appeared outside of Update).
— I hate those long mid-sentence pauses Alec often makes as Trump. I know he’s spoofing an actual vocal mannerism of the real Trump’s, but something about the way Alec does those pauses hurts the humor of those lines for me.
— Kenan’s delivery of his threatening message to Alec’s Trump made me laugh.
STARS: **½
MONOLOGUE
KAM & AIB fear that former Trump tweet target host is too cool for school
— Those Trump tweets about the Kristen Stewart/Robert Pattinson relationship are REAL?!?
— Something about Kristen Stewart’s delivery of this monologue’s material is coming off iffy to me so far.
— The Kate/Aidy bit in this is only mildly funny to me. Nothing great.
— There’s the famous F-bomb in this monologue. Kristen said it so quickly and mumbled it so much that I and probably a number of others wouldn’t have even caught it had she not had that reaction immediately afterwards.
— Speaking of reactions to Kristen’s F-bomb, Kate and Aidy’s reactions are very funny. I also like how afterwards, while saying the usual “We got a great show for you etc.” tagline, Kristen throws in an “and I’ll never come back” ad-lib about her F-bomb.
STARS: **½
U.S. CUSTOMS WELCOME VIDEO
Homeland Security employee (BEB) shoehorns travel ban into customs video
— The sloppy occasional voice-over additions from Beck are hilarious.
— Out of all the Beck voice-over additions, I particularly love the part where, when he’s saying a rapid succession of “No”s in regards to who in a photo of people at an airport will be allowed to travel, he initially responds to the sight of a little boy in the photo by quickly saying a faux-sincere “Awww!” before immediately saying a stern “NO.”
— The “highly detailed questionnaire” (the fourth-to-last above screencap for this commercial) is hilarious.
— Very sharp satire here. I am loving this commercial.
— Beck’s final line, in which he reacts in frustration to being told over the phone that a judge blocked the travel ban, was clearly thrown in at the last minute, after this commercial was filmed, given the fact that the blocking of the travel ban didn’t happen until the morning of this episode.
STARS: ****½
UCONN DRY FRIDAYS
(host)’s blitzed anecdotes wow college alcohol education class attendees
— Yeesh, Kristen’s delivery of that “no-hawk” bit was AWFUL and ruined the gag.
— Mikey’s always perfect at playing this type of laid-back, affable straight man role who tries to come off relatable to the people he’s speaking to and tries to maintain that laid-back affability when reacting to something weird. I particularly like his delivery of the “You can go ahead and…pop that beanie back on” line that he keeps saying throughout the sketch.
— Kristen’s delivery continues to be very iffy, which is a shame, as her lines in this sketch are very good, and her personality does seem right for this role. Her lines are still somewhat making me laugh despite her iffy delivery, but I can’t help but feel that this sketch would’ve been much better if they had done it with another female host this season. Emma Stone in particular would’ve killed it in this sketch.
STARS: **½
TOTINO
hungry guys go without Totino’s Pizza Rolls amidst torrid lesbian romance
— Our third and final installment of this fantastic annual Super Bowl tradition of SNL’s.
— An absolutely FANTASTIC turn this commercial unexpectedly takes once Vanessa meets Kristen’s character.
— Kristen: “Hi, I’m Sabine. What’s your name?” Vanessa: “I…I never had one.”
— Vanessa, after being told by Kristen to stay with her: “(softly) But…what about my hungry guys?” Kristen: “What are YOU hungry for?”
— The slow-motion montage of Kristen and Vanessa’s romantic, passionate embracing is utterly classic. I particularly love the part with them speaking to each other in a foreign language.
— Overall, a masterpiece, and the absolutely perfect conclusion to this amazing trilogy of Totino’s ads. And after getting familiar with Vanessa’s likable character over the course of these three ads, it’s so satisfying to see her have such a happy conclusion.
STARS: *****
PRESS CONFERENCE
belligerent Sean Spicer (Melissa McCarthy) briefs & berates the press
— The debut of Melissa McCarthy’s Sean Spicer impression.
— When this originally aired, I remember that my shocked “Oh, that’s Melissa McCarthy!” reaction happened at the exact same time as the audience’s, when the camera cut to a close-up of McCarthy about 20 seconds after she entered this sketch.
— I love the extended pause McCarthy’s Spicer takes in the middle of his speech while chewing that ridiculously huge wad of candy.
— A lot of laughs from the ways McCarthy’s Spicer keeps twisting bad statements around to make them seem like the reporters at this press conference were the ones who said them.
— A great sequence with McCarthy’s Spicer using ridiculous props to make his point.
— Feels odd seeing Kristen Stewart playing a reporter like most of the cast is playing, but I guess they had to work the host into this sketch SOMEHOW. McCarthy’s dominant presence here actually made me temporarily forget who the actual host of this episode is.
— A very funny cutaway to Kyle as a CNN reporter locked in a cage.
— The mere gleeful, open-mouthed smile on Kate’s face when she enters as Betsy DeVos is cracking me up.
— A big laugh from the cut-off ending to Kate-as-DeVos’ speech, immediately after her guns-in-schools mention.
— Man, McCarthy is playing this material to perfection (even with the occasional line flubs). Even being aware of the McCarthy-as-Spicer follow-up sketches (none of which I recall being quite as strong as this one, but we’ll see), and the fact that this is the debut of the “women playing male members of Trump’s cabinet” habit that I would end up getting so tired of, I’m still currently finding this first Spicer sketch to be amazing to watch.
STARS: *****
MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “Scars To Your Beautiful”
WEEKEND UPDATE
on the eve of the Super Bowl, David Ortiz (KET) lists other endorsements
— Colin and Michael are so damn good by this point of their Update tenures that they even managed to get a lot of great laughs out of Michael completely botching the hell out of his “If your kid’s dog dies, you don’t tell them…etc.” bit.
— I love Colin’s speech about how much we’re learning about government and the world from Trump.
— Some of Kenan-as-Big-Papi’s endorsements tonight aren’t quite as hilarious as usual, but they’re still making me laugh a lot, and his Little Scissors bit is certainly up to par.
— Keeping up tonight’s trend of priceless huge Update gaffes (and priceless huge gaffes in general tonight if you include Kristen’s F-bomb in the monologue), we get a classic one with Colin ending the Big Papi commentary by VERY prematurely saying his “For Weekend Update, I’m Colin Jost” sign-off into the camera, before realizing there’s still several minutes of Update left. When this episode originally aired, this gaffe of Colin’s had me laughing for about a minute straight. Michael also has an excellent ad-lib in response to that gaffe of Colin’s, telling him “You just saved my job”, a callback to Michael’s own huge gaffe earlier in this Update.
— Colin, in an ad-lib right before delivering his first joke after his aforementioned huge gaffe: “I want to quote our host from the monologue.”
— Yet ANOTHER great ad-libbed callback, this time with Michael referring to Lady Gaga as “Lady Haha”, which Kenan’s Big Papi did earlier in this Update.
— Very strong ending to this Update with Michael’s Patriots vs. Falcons joke. This is also a rare Jost/Che Update to NOT end with a guest commentary. (Maybe that explains Colin’s gaffe from earlier.)
STARS: ****½
FAMILY FEUD
Steve Harvey (KET) queries supporters of Falcons & Patriots
— Surprisingly, Kenan’s Steve Harvey isn’t saying his usual comical one-liner about each celebrity contestant right after they make their intro statement.
— Interesting seeing Kristen completely playing against type as Gisele Bundchen.
— I absolutely love Alex’s Casey Affleck impression. He is nailing Affleck’s sleepy, monotone voice, and is also making it funny. As I said in a previous review, I always love when a cast member impersonates someone who recently hosted at the time, as it makes me assume the cast member developed that impression after having gotten used to that host’s voice and mannerisms from working with them all week.
— Kenan’s Steve Harvey, when Kate’s Justin Bieber is trying to impress Kristen’s Bundchen by doing his usual shy/swaggy mannerisms: “I got some bad news for you, playa – that don’t work on women that’s GROWN.”
— The casting of Leslie as Samuel L. Jackson is so damn weird and random that it’s kinda working for me. I’d like to think that weirdness and randomness of the casting is also what Leslie herself is visibly cracking up at.
— I’m enjoying the “laugh” that Bobby’s Bill Belichick keeps doing.
STARS: ***
MEET CUTE
(PED) & (host) agree to date without exchanging information
— Nice seeing Pete do a piece like this, which allows him to stretch his acting chops. He’s doing a very solid job here.
— A good laugh from Mikey’s cold and blunt delivery of “No” in response to a long question Pete dramatically asks him while pouring his heart out.
— Very funny scenes of Pete’s increasing desperation and panicking when trying to find where Kristen lives. I also like how those scenes are juxtaposed with shots of Kristen’s character going through typical upbeat romcom tropes.
— Good ending.
STARS: ****
MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “River Of Tears”
WILLY WONKA & THE CHOCOLATE FACTORY
Willy Wonka’s golden ticket reveals Charlie’s (host) grandparents’ health
— Wow, and I thought Pete played against type in the Meet Cute short. He’s completely stretching his range in this short. This has to be the most I’ve ever seen him disappear into character. Keep in mind that I haven’t seen SNL’s current 46th season, where I hear Pete’s been better than ever and has been doing well playing types of roles that are very different from what he was previously known for playing. I’m looking forward to seeing that when I reach that season in this project.
— A decent reveal of the grandparents being able to walk, much to Kristen-as-Charlie’s upset shock.
— Kristen, when angrily mentioning the things she did for Mikey when she thought he couldn’t walk: “I washed your balls!” Mikey: “I didn’t ASK you to. I also thought that was strange.”
— I’m pretty meh on that ending.
STARS: ***
GOODNIGHTS
IMMEDIATE POST-SHOW THOUGHTS
— A slow start with the cold opening, monologue, and UConn Dry Fridays sketch (though the U.S. Customs Welcome Video commercial was very strong), but after that, this episode really took off. Two back-to-back five-star segments, one of the best-ever Jost/Che Weekend Updates, a great Meet Cute short, and two decent post-Update sketches. Kinda like this episode itself, Kristen Stewart had a rough start in her first few performances, but after that, she was fine for the rest of the show, and was especially good in the pre-tapes.
MY PERSONAL CHOICE OF “BEST OF” MOMENTS FOR THIS EPISODE, REPRESENTED WITH SCREENCAPS
RATED SEGMENTS RANKED FROM BEST TO WORST
Totino
Press Conference
U.S. Customs Welcome Video
Weekend Update
Meet Cute
Family Feud
Willy Wonka & The Chocolate Factory
UConn Dry Fridays
Monologue
Oval Office
HOW THIS EPISODE STACKS UP AGAINST THE PRECEDING ONE (Aziz Ansari)
a slight step down
My full set of screencaps for this episode is here
TOMORROW
Alec Baldwin