May 12, 1984 – Billy Crystal, Mayor Ed Koch, Edwin Newman, Father Guido Sarducci, and Betty Thomas / The Cars (S9 E19)

Segments are rated on a scale of 1-5 stars

COLD OPENING
Sammy Davis, Jr. (BIC) breakdances & sings with Frank Sinatra (JOP)

       

— Yet another extensive season 9 pre-taped segment that signals the upcoming heavy usage of pre-tapes next season.
— Very funny visual of the limo “driving” backwards from Radio City to NBC.
— LOL at the random 80s breakdancer outside 30 Rock. I also liked Joe-as-Sinatra’s sour response to seeing that: “Look at this crap these crazy kids are into nowadays.”
— That obviously must be a double in Billy Crystal’s place as he’s breakdancing, but the editing made it look pretty convincing.
— An on-camera appearance from Don Pardo!
— I liked Don’s facial reaction to Joe’s Sinatra sending him to get towels.
— I’m enjoying how extensive this whole cold opening feels.
— Fairly fun musical performance from Joe and Billy.
— Nice way of working in “Live from New York…”
STARS: ***½


MONOLOGUE
(no synopsis available)

   

— Heh, Billy’s still removing his Sammy Davis Jr. makeup. I had been wondering during the cold opening how Billy was going to get all that dark makeup off in time for the monologue.
— Very interesting seeing FIVE hosts all on the SNL stage at the same time.
— That’s it? It’s over already? This featured literally nothing. The hosts came out on stage and then we’re told “We’ll be right back” and that was it. This is kinda disappointing, as I was looking forward to seeing what they would do for a monologue with five hosts.
STARS: N/A (not a rateable segment)


SARDUCCI & NELSON
Father Guido Sarducci & Willie Nelson (JIB) join to do an album of duets

 

— Funny pairing.
— Wow, Father Guido Sarducci actually has a really nice singing voice. Who knew?
— What was with the “You Don’t Bring Me Flowers”/”You don’t sing me love songs” mix-up? Seemed like it was a genuine blooper.
— The humor in this sketch seems to be dying down after the main joke has been well established.
— Okay, they won me back over with the ending.
STARS: ***


MAYOR KOCH’S NEIGHBORHOOD
Worthington Clotman says no more “buy my book”

   

— A very funny concept with Ed Koch in place of Mister Robinson.
— I was surprised to hear an on-air acknowledgment of Eddie Murphy’s SNL departure.
— LOL at Koch’s attempt at doing the “Mister Robinson surprised face” close-up bit.
— Interesting seeing Tim’s Worthington Clotman outside of Saturday Night News.
— Kind of a weird ending, but the sketch as a whole still worked.
STARS: ***½


MIKKO’S GOT YOUR NOSE SAFETY GUARD
prevents accidental child rhinoplasty

    

— Julia’s skin looks darker than usual for some reason.
— Actually, so does Joe’s.
— Hilarious sudden sight gag with Julia’s face projectile bleeding after Joe unintentionally pulls off her nose.
— I love Joe’s panicking when he finally realizes he has Julia’s severed nose in his hand. This sketch is hilarious.
— A great “How many times has THIS happened to you?” from Brad as the spokesperson.
— Overall, one of the great gory projectile-bleeding sketches in SNL history.
STARS: ****


GUIDO ON THE STREET
Father Guido Sarducci asks various questions to Manhattan commuters

   

— I like the part with one guy telling Sarducci the four ways to skin a cat.
— If you know me, you’ll know that I love how Sarducci’s now asking a Three Stooges question.
— I’m enjoying the fast pacing of this as well as Sarducci’s absurd questions.
— Good ending with him hitching a ride in the backseat of a police car.
STARS: ***


NEEDLEMAN
nerdy oral surgeon’s (GAK) dating service tape is music video-like

       

— “Video date?” Oh, I think this is going to be to the Needleman video that I’ve always been dying to see.
— Jim’s creepy video was pretty funny.
— Yep, here comes Gary as Ira Needleman. It’ll be interesting to see how his normal-so-far intro will transition into the famous music video.
— Yes! Here’s his music video! This is ALREADY coming off awesome so far.
— The “spit” part with the female dancers was hilarious.
— I’m loving the sudden slow tempo change when Needleman is listing off his likes and what he wants in a girl.
— Man, they are going ALL OUT out for this.
— Overall, this did not let me down. This was just as fantastic as legend had me expecting, and featured a phenomenal job by Gary. And much like “Look At Our Video” from a few episodes ago, this is another example of this season doing a very dead-on, detailed parody of then-contemporary music videos.
— Gary would go on to credit this piece as being the thing that got him a third season on SNL. I believe he said if it weren’t for this sketch, he most likely would’ve gotten fired after this season like he originally did after his first season (before Brad Hall stood up for him and convinced Ebersol to immediately re-hire him).
STARS: *****


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “Drive”


SATURDAY NIGHT NEWS
Dr. Ruth Westheimer (MAG) says she learned all about sex from her mother
Dr. Jack Badofsky lists medical disorders named after celebrities
Fernando is miffed because he thought he would anchor the news

       

— Edwin Newman does the SNL news once again.
— First time we’ve seen Mary’s Dr. Ruth in quite a while.
— Didn’t care too much for the sight gag of Dr. Ruth’s mother being so short that she can’t be seen over the desk.
— Mary’s overall Mother’s Day commentary was okay.
— Edwin’s delivery seems unusually slow tonight, even moreso than it usually is. I’m not liking it as much as I liked his delivery when he hosted earlier this season.
— Funny delay with the beginning of Tim’s commentary while he’s seen still applying his clip-on microphone.
— It took Tim a while to get into character before speaking, thanks to the aforementioned delay.
— Here’s our last-ever Dr. Jack Badofsky commentary.
— LOL at the negative audience reaction to the “Syphyllis Schlafly” pun.
— And that’s the official end for Dr. Jack. Tonight’s appearance was fine, though no particular puns here stood out to me and I was a little disappointed we didn’t get the usual great ad-lib out of Tim at any point during this.
— Here’s Fernando making yet another Saturday Night News appearance this season.
— Boy, Billy has really been running the “You look mahvelous” catchphrase in the ground these last few episodes. I don’t like how he always has to spend the first 30 seconds of his Fernando appearances just going on and on about how the audience and whoever is next to him “look mahvelous”. It’s not a good sign when I’ve ALREADY gotten tired of that catchphrase before we’ve even reached Billy’s stint as a cast member in season 10.
— Edwin charming his way into convincing Fernando to let him continue doing the news tonight was fairly funny.
STARS: **½


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “Magic”


HELLO, TRUDY!
Edwin nearly jeopardizes the show’s future

   

— The return of this solid sketch from earlier this season. As I said last time, I’m a little wary over how this will turn out as a recurring sketch, since it doesn’t seem like the type of premise that will lend itself well to repetition.
— I liked Edwin’s “Oh, brother…” when Trudy calls a second time.
— Funny how Trudy is making a reluctant Jim do increasingly ridiculous things to Edwin.
— Surprising turn with Trudy angrily quitting as a viewer of this show.
— Oh, Jim eventually won her back over.
— Jim pushing Edwin away just as he was about to give Trudy advice was pretty funny.
— Overall, this second installment of “Hello, Trudy” surprisingly worked. I’m glad they didn’t just repeat the exact same premise from the first installment of this sketch, and Edwin made for a really good foil here.
STARS: ***½


JOEL HODGSON
Joel Hodgson [real] plays Mystery Date with audience & uses the Levitron

       

— During her intro, Betty Thomas (in her first non-monologue appearance of the whole night, by the way) noticeably announces Joel Hodgson as “Joel Hodges”.
— The “Mystery Date” part seems a little weird, especially the jingle Joel’s singing, which the audience is giving immediate recognition laughter to. It must be parodying something I’m not familiar with.
— A good laugh from Joel sending the Mystery Date-losing audience member away bowling.
— What’s with the random repeated buzzer sound throughout this?
— Oh, I see, the buzzer is reminding him to eat a Pez. Funny running bit.
— Amusing reveal of how he did the “Levitron” trick.
— Haha, oh my god at the bit with him demonstrating the insane costume invention he made involving snakes-in-a-can.
— Overall, an okay Joel Hodgson appearance (his final one on SNL, I believe), though this was slower-paced than usual. I prefer the tighter pacing of some of his earlier appearances.
STARS: ***


KARATE SCHOOL
the Three Stooges (GAK), (JOP), (TIK) teach a women’s self-defense class

     

— Sad that Betty Thomas is just NOW making her first actual sketch appearance of the night.
— A Three Stooges sketch!!! Oh, you KNOW I’m going crazy over this.
— Weird seeing “Moe” being so much shorter than his fellow Stooges.
— As always, great Curly impression from Joe.
— Tim and Gary are also doing pretty well in their impressions.
— This is an absolutely dead-on parody of the Stooges so far.
— Ha, Joe’s pants accidentally fell down!!! Hilarious blooper.
— And now the pants fell down again!
— Love how all the performers (especially the female cast members) have lost their composure due to the aforementioned blooper.
— Great ending with the ladies imitating the Stooges’ mannerisms and chasing them around the room while the Stooges’ theme music “Listen to the Mockingbird” plays.
— Overall, I loved this sketch, probably more than most people do. I’m biased because this really appealed to me as a Stooges fanatic, and had a classic blooper to boot.
STARS: ****


GOODNIGHTS

 


IMMEDIATE POST-SHOW THOUGHTS:
— A pretty strong season-ender. We got some great sketches tonight, nothing flopped too badly at all, and the novelty of having five hosts gave the show an exciting feel. Part of me wishes this experiment with having a season finale be hosted by five different people who hosted earlier in the season was occasionally done again in some of the later years, though I can kinda understand why they kept it a one-time thing.

— My copy of this episode is missing a sketch at the end of the show called “Sushi Restaurant”, which features all five of tonight’s hosts and has something to do with Godzilla terrorizing a Japanese restaurant. Interesting-sounding premise and it would’ve been fun to see how it managed to work all five hosts into one sketch, which sounds like a nice way to end this special season finale.

— Tonight ended up being the final episode for Joe Piscopo, Robin Duke, Brad Hall, and Tim Kazurinsky, which is quite a shake-up for SNL. I know Joe left on his own, and I’m assuming the same goes for Tim.  I know Brad was fired, and I’m guessing Robin was as well. [ADDENDUM: According to some comments I received, it turns out all four performers were fired, including Joe and Tim. Wow.] Of the four of them, Joe and Tim will be the most missed, as they both played an important part to the show these last few seasons and were very versatile and often reliable. Robin was usually always good, but the problem with her tenure was that she often suffered from being very underused and wasted, which made her come off invisible at times. I had issues with Brad as a performer during his first season-and-a-half, and I figured when he got removed from his anchorperson role on Saturday Night News in the middle of this season that he would have practically nothing left to do for the remainder of the season, as he had never been known to be a standout sketch performer. I was surprised to find out that not only was he not as invisible in the second half of this season as I predicted, but he actually began growing on me more and more during the last few months of the season. The issues I used to have with him were gradually fading away as he was starting to develop into a quietly solid performer. As I said in a recent review, I wonder if that growth would’ve continued had he been brought back next season.

— Season 9 as a whole was a very interesting one. With the show’s megastar Eddie Murphy half-gone for most of the year, you’d think that would spell trouble for the show considering how heavily they used to lean on him to carry the show and how he was the main reason many people tuned into SNL, but the show surprisingly ended up managing to still do well without his dominance this season. (And let’s be honest: even in some of the appearances Eddie DID make this season, he came off kinda complacent and seemed like he was ready to move on from SNL) The addition of Jim Belushi to the cast helped, as he turned out to have a great first year and added a new energy to the show. Another addition that helped this season was new writer Andy Breckman, who added a lot of much-needed creativity to the writing and who’s conceptual, hilarious, premise-driven sketches were usually always a highlight of the show. Yet another interesting thing is how some unique aspects of next season started forming in the last quarter of THIS season: the writing style started to shift quite a bit, we started getting more and more reliance on strong pre-taped pieces, Billy Crystal was getting more and more involved with the show, and the penultimate episode’s musical guest (Spinal Tap) consisted of members who would all either be part of next season’s cast or would host that season at one point. Very intriguing to watch the whole gradual transition from season 9 to season 10.


HOW THIS EPISODE STACKS UP AGAINST THE PRECEDING ONE (Barry Bostwick):
— about the same


HOW THIS SEASON STACKS UP AGAINST THE PRECEDING SEASON (1982-83):
— a step up


My full set of screencaps for this episode is here


TOMORROW:

Season 10 begins, featuring no host. The season will have quite a number of major changes to the show’s general atmosphere and we also get a large influx of new additions to the cast, most of whom are already famous and one of whom is one of the very people who co-hosted tonight’s season finale.

November 5, 1983 – Betty Thomas / Stray Cats (S9 E4)

Segments are rated on a scale of 1-5 stars

COLD OPENING
spacesuit-wearing Jesse Jackson (JOP) thinks staff is better than “stuff”

 

— Oh my god at Joe as Jesse Jackson.
— I recall hearing that the whole spacesuit theme, as well as some of the references Joe makes here, are very topical political references that have become lost to time over the years since this episode’s original airing.
— I can’t exactly call Joe’s Jesse Jackson impression dead-on, but I am liking his fiery performance here.
— That’s it? It’s over already? What exactly was the point of this? Again, it must’ve been funnier to audiences in 1983 who got all the topical references. Watching it in modern times, this seems like it has no jokes at all.
STARS: *½


MONOLOGUE
(no synopsis available)

  

— Some laughs from the gun hidden under her skirt and the bit with the nightstick.
— Not much to this overall monologue, but she handled this really well and came off likable.
STARS: ***


SWAN BREAK
(JIB) dances in a Flashdance-style version of Swan Lake

     

— I like the random inclusion of Jim’s out-of-place character.
— Love the sudden turn this has taken, with the song “Maniac” playing and Jim sloppily going through all of Jennifer Beals’ classic Flashdance moves.
— Jim is really funny in this, and this feels like the type of sketch his brother John would’ve made a popular classic if it were done in the original era.
— The obligatory “lay back in a chair as water splashes down from above” part was funny due to the heavy amount of water that splashed Jim, which knocked off his wig. Judging from his amused reaction, I don’t think that was supposed to happen.
STARS: ****


CURLY AUDITION
Elvis look-alike (JOP) auditions for role of Curly in a 3 Stooges tribute

  

— A Three Stooges sketch! If you know me, you’ll know how I feel about seeing this.
— I loved Joe taking off his Elvis wig, revealing a Curly-esque look, and how he’s now going into random Curly sound effects throughout the song he’s singing.
— What the–? This suddenly gets cut off by a “special report”, which I guess leads us into our next segment. I actually wanted to see this sketch go on longer.
STARS: ***½


SPECIAL REPORT
shortchanged USA tourist leads to invasion of Switzerland

     

— Pretty funny premise of the U.S. invading Switzerland. I like how SNL is going out of their way to make this appear real, even going so far as using an outside actor to play the anchorman delivering the breaking news. And I think that’s head writer Andrew Smith playing the White House press secretary holding a conference.
— An appearance from Brad’s Saturday Night News anchorman persona. Why is he reporting from a generic news set instead of the usual Saturday Night News set?
— The whole “shortchanged at a chocolate shop” scene is quite funny.
STARS: ***½


PERFECTLY FRANK
ad exec (JOP) subliminally seduces psychologist (host)

  

— The title almost had me thinking this was going to be another Frank Sinatra-themed TV show sketch.
— Funny concept with Joe subliminally saying seductive things to Betty. But, boy, does Joe’s subliminal delivery pale badly in comparison to future cast member Kevin Nealon’s. Joe’s too broad with the way he’s doing the subliminal lines. The routine is funnier with Nealon, partly because of the way he says it so deadpan and subtle.
— Gary gets some laughs at the end.
STARS: ***


JAMES BROWN’S CELEBRITY HOT TUB PARTY
Godfather of Soul (EDM) gets in

   

— Ahh, here’s an all-time classic! I always enjoy seeing this one.
— Right off the bat after he’s made his entrance, Eddie is already coming off amazing in this.
— Oh, I’m absolutely LOVING this song.
— Hilarious how he’s musically narrating his actions as he’s hesitantly dipping into the hot tub.
— And already, we’re out. This sketch was the perfect length, and the fact that this whole thing just turned out to be his drawn-out entrance into the hot tub is very funny.
— Overall, one of Eddie’s all-time best, as well as one of SNL’s all-time best.
— This was the first airing of what will be several Eddie Murphy sketches this season that were taped during a special “preview show” right before the start of this season so Ebersol could insert them into episodes that Eddie will be missing this season while he’s off in Hollywood filming movies.  Eddie not being in the building tonight explains why Jesse Jackson was played by Joe in the cold opening.
STARS: *****


YOU WIN A DOLLAR
(JIB) endures dangerous stunts in vain hope of a buck

     

— Brad plays another gameshow host. The hokey, corny delivery Brad often uses on SNL actually fits well in the role of a cheesy gameshow host.
— There’s SNL’s very first use of the name Dale Butterworth, which would go on to be one of the trademarks of Andy Breckman-written sketches.
— I’m already liking the concept of contestants eagerly striving to win just one dollar.
— Haha, oh my god at the bowl-filled-with-razor-blades part and Jim’s hand emerging from the bowl while covered in blood.
— This is getting more and more insane, with Jim now being forced to “bob for chicken wings” in a deep fryer.
— All of Jim’s reactions are fantastic.
— I like Brad’s constant “Oh, one more thing” additions to the initially pleasant-sounding Love Tent challenge.
— Brad: “Do we have a consolation prize for him, Don?” Don Pardo: “(exuberantly) No!”
— Overall, this very strong sketch was a riot. Between this and the Larry’s Corner sketch from the season premiere, new writer Andy Breckman has been having a VERY promising start so far. I’m not aware of the subsequent sketches he’s written (at least not off the top of my head), but whatever they are, I’m definitely looking forward to them.
STARS: ****½


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “She’s Sexy + 17”


UNANSWERED QUESTIONS
Havnagootiim Vishnuuerheer addresses Unanswered Questions Of The Universe

 

— This is the first time this character has ever appeared outside Saturday Night News.
— His various questions about the human body are pretty funny.
— Seems to be a legit mailing address that he asks viewers to send in unanswered questions to, so he can answer them later on. I wonder if SNL ends up following through on this.
STARS: ***


THE GUMBY STORY
Gumby directs the movie version of his life story

    

— You can REALLY tell just by the visual quality of this sketch that it’s another piece that was taped before the start of this season.
— Eddie as Gumby to his impersonator: “Who told you say dammit, dammit?!”
— Funny part with Gary trying various gestures to get Joe’s attention while he’s on the phone.
— I like Robin’s walk-on as Gumby’s dumpy-looking wife.
— Surprised to see Jim in this, considering this was taped before the season began and Jim didn’t officially join the cast until the third episode of the season.
STARS: ***


SATURDAY NIGHT NEWS
outdated & inappropriate file footage is used to document Swiss invasion
people on the street react to the news of the invasion
BRH warns JIB against using catchphrases & bits from the original SNL
Ronald Reagan (JOP) addresses USA regarding the invasion of Switzerland
Slopes of Fear- a CIA film shows Swiss links to the communists

           

— Nice how they’re keeping up the Switzerland invasion premise from earlier tonight.
— Funny segment with the Switzerland invasion “file footage” consisting of old out-of-place stock footage and silent movies.
— The reactions of people on the street learning about the Switzerland situation has a few laughs.
— I like how Brad calls Jim out on copying his “you ignorant slut” rebuttal from Dan Aykroyd.
— Ha, now Jim’s going through various other catchphrases from the original era (“but nooo”, “excuuuse meee”, etc.) all of which get shot down by Brad because they belong to the original cast. Also, nice touch with one of Jim’s borrowed phrases being Bill Murray’s “I love you, now get out of here, I mean it”, which usually isn’t as often-quoted as the other 70s catchphrases Jim’s quoting here. The audience gave instant recognition laughter when Jim quoted it, though.
— Jim is now griping about how unfair it is that people will turn against him for doing anything even remotely reminiscent of famous things his brother John did in the original era.
— As someone who recently reviewed the entire original era, I personally got much more of a kick out of Jim’s overall commentary than most people probably would.
— Brad’s joke about Big Bird dying of anorexia was hilarious.
— Another follow-up to the Switzerland storyline. Now we’re seeing Joe’s Reagan impression giving a press conference on the Switzerland situation.
— Now Joe throws to a “Slopes of Fear” documentary about Switzerland. SNL’s really going all-out on this whole storyline.
— Funny part of “Slopes of Fear” where they “translate” the yodeling in a stock footage clip.
— Overall, one of the better editions of Saturday Night News.
STARS: ***


JANE FONDA’S PREGNANCY, BIRTH, LABOR, RE-ENTERING THE JOB MARKET, TRYING TO CATCH A MAN, TRYING TO KEEP A MAN, MAKING NEW FRIENDS, HOLDING YOUR BREATH, AND GOING OVER YOUR CREDIT LIMIT WORK OUT
(ROD) goes into labor during Jane Fonda’s (host) pregnancy workout

   

— Longest sketch title ever?
— Whoa, a very distracting audio glitch has suddenly started in my copy, where the dialogue is overlapped with audio of the same dialogue being replayed a second later. I was once informed by fellow SNL fan & reviewer Ben Douwsma that audio glitches like this are common in these old Comedy Network reruns whenever they removed something from a sketch. I wonder what was removed from this particular sketch.
— Okay, thankfully, the audio glitch is over.
— Mary giving up in the middle of the workout and breaking out a cigarette is funny.
— I saw Robin going into labor coming from a mile away.
STARS: **½


MEMOREX
Memorex video tape captures FBI’s close framing of Lee Iacocca (JOP)

  

— This seems a little too topical, but unlike the cold opening, I can still follow this well-enough.
— I liked Brad blatantly calling Iacocca “Mr. Ia-COKE-a”.
— Good Memorex twist at the end.
STARS: ***


CRISIS ’83 UPDATE
footage of American evacuees & their horror stories about Switzerland

   

— The American returnees’ various complaints about the “torture” they endured in Switzerland are really funny.
— Yet another viewer-submission mailing address being displayed tonight (this time on the topic of what country do we want U.S. to invade next), though this one is obviously fake.
STARS: ***


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “I Won’t Stand in Your Way”


MISFITS
at a support group meeting, transsexuals miss their former male lives

 

— Uh, okay… this is going to be an… uh, interesting premise.
— It IS a change of pace, though, how they’re using female performers in these roles instead of putting male performers in drag for these roles.
— Robin’s unibrow makes her resemble one of Cheri Oteri’s more obscure recurring characters: the unattractive, accordion-playing Italian daughter Maria.
— I feel like I shouldn’t be laughing at this sketch in today’s world, but I am getting some laughs from the transsexuals going on about what they miss about being a man. It’s something about the performances that’s winning me over; Betty and the female cast members are getting really into this.
STARS: **½


GOODNIGHTS

 


IMMEDIATE POST-SHOW THOUGHTS:
— A solid episode, especially the first half. The quality dropped off after Saturday Night News, but overall, this is my favorite episode of this season so far. Also, the Switzerland Invasion running premise gave the night a unique feel and the show was fully committed to it.


HOW THIS EPISODE STACKS UP AGAINST THE PRECEDING ONE (John Candy):
— a step up


My full set of screencaps for this episode is here


TOMORROW:

Teri Garr