Tag: Britney Spears

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October 18, 2003 – Halle Berry / Britney Spears (S29 E3)

Segments are rated on a scale of 1-5 stars

PRESS CONFERENCE
publicly-supportive wife (MAR) yanks Kobe Bryant’s (FIM) leash in private

— A solid fiery-mad performance from Maya as Vanessa Bryant whenever Chris steps out of the room, and how Maya’s Vanessa immediately shifts back to “loving, sentimental, supporting wife” mode whenever Chris returns to the room.
— Maya’s Vanessa responding to Finesse-as-Kobe’s “I hate that!” with “You know what *I* hate? I hate goin’ to my husband’s rape trial” is a line that stuck with me for a lot of years, and got a very big audience reaction.
— Interesting fake-out with Finesse’s “Live from New York…” getting cut off by Maya. It would’ve been shocking if SNL let Finesse say LFNY only three episodes into his tenure as a new featured player. Then again, Abby Elliott would later say LFNY in only her fifth episode as a featured player, and likewise for Paul Brittain in only his fourth episode as a featured player.
STARS: ***


MONOLOGUE
LOM tries to get host to kiss musical guest a la Madonna at MTV Awards

— A pretty cliched premise, and SNL has gone to the “Lorne plays a horndog towards the host and/or musical guest” well a few times too many by this point of SNL’s run.
— I bet Lorne died a little inside having to mention Adrien Brody when bringing up Halle’s Oscars kiss. The next time SNL mentions Adrien Brody, just two episodes from now, it wouldn’t be in such a kind manner.
— I did get a laugh from Lorne asking Halle and Britney Spears to “Do it for those poor Cub fans”, as this is just a few days after the infamous Steve Bartman incident (an incident I remember all too well, as someone who lived in Chicago at the time and was exposed to the incident ad nauseam on the local news the week of tonight’s episode.)
— This monologue ends with Halle and Britney basically promising us that they’ll kiss later in the episode. However, said kiss ends up NEVER happening. Really, SNL? What a cheap-ass ratings gimmick, trying to get viewers to stay tuned into tonight’s episode, expecting a Halle/Britney kiss. (And SNL also teased the same thing in one of the promos earlier that week.) And then the kiss ends up not even happening! I would call this a new low for SNL, but I guess it ain’t THAT big a deal. Still, though, fucking really, SNL?
STARS: **


GAYSTROGEN
Gaystrogen restores homosexual behavior of (CHP)’s partner (FRA)

— I remember finding this commercial absolutely hilarious back when it originally aired, but all these years later, I now find this kind of gay stereotype humor hacky and tired, especially in an SNL era that relied increasingly heavier on this type of humor.
— After Fred yelled “White is white, Steven!”, I did like Parnell’s humorously dramatic, emotional delivery of “Since when, Russ?! Since when?”
— The part showing a computerized model graphic responding to taking a Gaystrogen pill by becoming rainbow-colored and doing a “gay” dance is one particular part of this commercial that I remember had me howling back in 2003, but I now just groan and roll my eyes at.
— The only thing I’ll say about the cheap man-on-man kissing from Fred and Chris at the end of this commercial is that it’s ironic how tonight’s SNL episode ends up not coming through on their promise of a Halle/Britney kiss, but does give us a same-sex kiss with two men instead. Is this SNL’s way of trolling all the horndogs who were anxiously awaiting the Halle/Britney kiss or something?
STARS: **


THE DON ZIMMER SPORTS SPECTACULAR
guests easily parry Don Zimmer’s (HOS) attacks

— I love Will singing the opening theme song. There’s a subtle absurdity to it that’s great.
— A very topical sketch that doesn’t hold up well, as the Don Zimmer/Pedro Martinez fight it’s based on is probably forgotten by a lot of people today, and is completely unknown to young people watching it in the future. Then again, I didn’t find this sketch funny even when it originally aired.
— Horatio is slipping some mannerisms of old-timey comedians into his Don Zimmer impression whenever he apologizes at the camera. I hear some of both Lou Costello and Curly from the Three Stooges in his voice (hell, at one point, he almost broke into Costello’s “I’m a baaaaaad boy” catchphrase), and just now, he even did the Curly-from-the-Three-Stooges hand-wave towards the camera. You’d think I’d love all of this, if you know how much of a diehard Three Stooges fanatic I am (and a fanatic of classic comedy teams in general, including Abbott & Costello), but nope. Horatio’s Curly/Lou Costello pastiche is just coming off annoying and unnecessary, and you can tell he’s probably amusing himself like crazy, which is something I always find UNBEARABLE about him. He finds himself far funnier than I do.
— Another annoying thing about Horatio’s performance here is that he keeps awkwardly pausing before delivering some lines. He’s always had a bad habit of doing that sometimes in general.
— I always love Darrell’s Bob Costas impression.
— Blah, a VERY one-joke sketch. And one joke that got tired after the first minute. Why the hell was this extremely thin sketch placed as the lead-off sketch of the night (besides the topical nature of it)?
— Boy, was that a lame ending… if it can even be called an ending.
— SNL would later replace this sketch with the dress rehearsal version in reruns.
STARS: *½


VERSACE HALLOWEEN
Naomi Campbell (host) & Elton John (HOS) visit

— Blah again. Ever since the Robert DeNiro episode from the preceding season, these Versace sketches have officially lost steam. And between the Don Zimmer sketch and this, tonight’s episode isn’t exactly off to a hot start.
— Okay, I did love the part just now with Versace inappropriately giving the trick-or-treating kids “candy cigarettes”, which are literally some candy and some cigarettes. That kinda reminds me of a classic bit from a Coneheads Halloween sketch, in which the Coneheads give trick-or-treating kids a 6-pack of beer.
— A nice and committed dive through a breakaway wall from Halle just now.
— Both SNL and NBC would go on to love that visual of Horatio’s Elton John wearing a Spongebob costume, as they would end up using an image of it in a number of things, including SNL promos displayed on the bottom of the screen during some other NBC shows.
— Ugh, Horatio looks like he’s cracking himself up AS USUAL, during the part when where his Elton John is singing. And right after I complained about how damn amused by himself Horatio often comes off.
— The gag with a bat flying out from under Versace’s dress fell flat.
— Okay, I did love Versace’s line after the aforementioned bat gag, with her starting to wrap up her show by saying “Since you can’t top a bat flying out of my cooch…”
STARS: **½


TEL-E-LINK
tel-e-link phone service is simple if you’re a cellular technology expert

— A decent commercial, though the premise of people casually spouting off increasingly complicated technical terms as if it’s simple was already used in that Wilson Countersink Flanges commercial from season 18. I think there was also another sketch or commercial that SNL used that premise in, but I can’t remember what.
— This is the first passing rating I’ve given to a segment tonight since all the way back in the cold opening.
STARS: ***


QUICK ONES
Quick Ones pills efficiently provide immediate sexual gratification

— Amy’s monotone fast-paced orgasm utterances after taking the pill was pretty funny.
— Meh, this premise is already starting to get a little old and one-note.
— Okay, Will is making the gag funny again with his great delivery.
— I got no laughs from that “We’re coming” double entendre at the end, even though it was intended to be badly cheesy.
STARS: **½


JAPANESE STEAK HOUSE
on her birthday, Starkisha (FIM) seeks shrimp at a Japanese restaurant

— OH FUCKING NO. The Starkisha bit that Finesse gave us an extended sample of in his Weekend Update commentary as himself in this season’s premiere has now been spun-off into its own recurring sketch. Oh, these are gonna be some brutally bad sketches to get through.
— Even the names of Starkisha’s friends in this sketch, Frerejaque and Appreciante, are reused from Finesse’s aforementioned Update commentary in the season premiere.
— Halle doing a variation of her work in the movie B.A.P.S.
— I still can’t get over how baby-faced Kenan looks in these early episodes of his compared to how he looks today. Then again, there is a 17-year gap between then and now.
— Boy, this is some cringey and groanworthy stereotypical ghetto humor.
— Chris, to Kenan, in regards to Starkisha and her friends: “Could you please tell your friends to keep it down?” Kenan: “Why they gotta be my friends? Hey, man, I came with YOU.” Solid delivery from Kenan on that very funny line, reminding me of what a reliable and sketch-saving straight man he would go on to regularly become in more recent seasons.
— Good god, that ending bit with Starkisha telling an Asian waiter “I loved you in that movie Rush Hour” was hacky as hell.
STARS: *½


THE SUNDAY NATIONAL ENQUIRER
The Sunday National Enquirer gives erudite readers their trash fix

— Some pretty good laughs from the way this National Enquirer ad is being presented in the manner of a wholesome and reputable newspaper ad.
— This is over already? This actually could’ve benefited from an extra half-minute. Speaking of which, I’m not 100% sure, but I think SNL would later show a longer version of this commercial in reruns, which includes more customers giving testimonials about the National Enquirer.
— Very awkward how this ended with no applause from the audience.
STARS: ***


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “Me Against The Music”


WEEKEND UPDATE
Native American stand-up Billy Smith (FRA) has to explain his references

Bob Swerski & nephew Bart (HOS) vow revenge on Cubs fan Steve Bartman

— Fred does his first of several intentionally bad stand-up comedian characters (I don’t think Fericito is supposed to be bad).
— I’m getting a big kick out of the anti-comedy of Fred’s Billy Smith commentary, and Fred is executing this very well. I remember when this episode originally aired, I absolutely loved how this Billy Smith commentary felt very much in the vein of Andy Kaufman (one of my biggest comedy idols). In his prime, Fred has a great knack for Andy Kaufman-style humor.
— Could’ve done without that bizarre ad-libbed vocalization Tina made in reaction to the audience’s response to her Kabbalah joke.
— That Chinese Space Launch bit… ehh, didn’t we already do a bit earlier tonight (the Starkisha sketch) making use of bad Asian stereotypes that have now aged poorly?
— There goes yet another display of Tina’s love of gay-themed punchlines.
— Tina keeps making unnecessary weird ad-libs after some of her jokes tonight. It kinda reminds me of Colin Quinn’s bad habit of muttering bizarre, often unfunny, and barely intelligible ad-libs in response to the audience reactions to some of his Update jokes.
— Now this is just sad. Horatio as a seemingly semi-mentally challenged member of Bill Swerski’s Super Fans? What the fuck are you doing, SNL?!? Get this crap off my screen. You’re pissing all over the legacy of the Super Fans sketches. Not to mention we’re getting yet another dreaded display of typical Fallon & Sanz jackassery.
— Boy, that is one horrible Chicago accent from Horatio, but I know it turns out to be an intentional part of his characterization, as we’ll see later on. Still doesn’t make it funny.
— As if I haven’t been shitting on Horatio enough in this episode review, now we get MORE painfully awkward long pauses between his lines here, like I mentioned earlier tonight. Ugh. I hate this habit of his. Why does he DO that?!?
— Ah, the return of George Wendt as Bob Swerski, here to save this unbearable Fallon/Sanz bit! Why didn’t SNL just have Wendt’s Bob Swerski come on in the first place by himself, without Horatio prefacing him by doing a terrible “updated” version of the Super Fans routine?
— I wonder if part of the reason for Wendt being willing to show up tonight is because his nephew, Jason Sudeikis, had recently debuted on SNL as a writer.
— Oh, no. Even with Wendt, this Super Fans commentary is still not working for me. It’s a complete mess, and the All That Jazz number at the end is doing nothing for me. It’s also sad to see Wendt get brought down to Jimmy and Horatio’s immature level. Just end this commentary already, SNL. I can’t watch anymore.
— The Super Fans commentary would later get replaced with the dress rehearsal version in reruns.
STARS: **


THE BEST OF KLYMAXX
Joey Lawrence (SEM) tries to interest ’80s fans in The Best Of Klymaxx

— Finesse in drag TWICE tonight?
— Speaking of black men in drag, it feels odd in retrospect seeing Kenan in his very first of MANY drag roles on SNL, given the fact that, 10 years later in 2013, he would publicly take a stand against dressing in drag and vow to officially stop playing women on SNL. I believe he has kept his word on that to this day, 7 years later, and it’s just one of several examples of how much he’s matured as a performer in more recent years. I wonder what his final drag role on SNL was.
— Boy, this sketch is doing absolutely NOTHING for me. Just having Halle and the cast play Klymaxx and sing their songs isn’t inherently funny.
— Okay, I did get a laugh from Rachel’s facial expression and sassy head-bob after incredulously asking “Your half?!?”
— The running bit with Fred’s non-responses to Seth’s Joey Lawrence asking him how great the Klymaxx CD is is falling REALLY flat. It’s getting zero laughs from both the audience and me. And Horatio’s long, awkward pauses from earlier portions of tonight’s episode must be contagious, because there’s an awful lot of bad long pauses between Fred and Seth’s lines in this sketch. Man, what the hell is going ON in tonight’s episode???
— Having Klymaxx do a variation of Duran Duran’s “Hungry Like The Wolf” is at least fairly funny in concept, even if I’m still not laughing all that much at the execution of it.
STARS: *½


BROKAW VOICEMAIL
Tom Brokaw (CHP) gets mad while recording a voicemail message for (host)

— Blah (I’ve been saying that quite a lot in this episode review), this sketch is going NOWHERE. I’m more than three minutes into this, and I haven’t laughed a single time.
— Great fiery-mad delivery from Chris when he loses his temper while recording the final voicemail message towards the end of this sketch. I still haven’t laughed a single time during this entire sketch, but at least Chris’ angry delivery towards the end was impressive.
— Horrible ending.
— SNL would later replace this sketch with the dress rehearsal version in reruns. (Notice a trend in this episode? Well, besides the trend of this episode sucking.) Two big differences I can remember in the dress version of this sketch is that, instead of telling Brokaw “Now you sound like you’re gay” after one of Brokaw’s recordings like she does in the live version, Halle actually says “Now you sound like a f*g”, though the slur in that line was bleeped out on TV. The ending was completely different in both versions too. The dress version’s ending (something to do with us seeing Halle’s voicemail playing the fiery-mad message that Brokaw recorded and it being followed by Halle saying something on the voicemail about how unpleasant it is to work with Brokaw) was a little less hacky then the live version’s ending, but still not funny.
STARS: *


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “Everytime”


ASHFORD & SIMPSON
on her birthday, (host) is thrilled to meet Ashford (KET) & Simpson (MAR)

— First a Klymaxx sketch, and now a freakin’ Ashford & Simpson sketch? What the hell? Were the writers on a 70s and 80s fix this week, or is this just a sign of how bad this season’s writers are at writing for black female hosts?
— Finesse has been getting tons of airtime in this episode, obviously because we have a black host. He’d better be enjoying all of this airtime, because this would end up being as good as it gets for him in his disappointing three-year SNL tenure. Actually, I recall him getting tons of airtime in the following season’s Queen Latifah-hosted episode too, which I guess proves that black women hosting is the only way for Finesse to catch a break on SNL.
— Most of this sketch is very blah (sorry for using that word AGAIN in this episode review). I am liking Kenan’s delivery here, though, which is the only bright spot I’ve been able to find.
— Guess what, folks? This is YET ANOTHER sketch in this episode that would later be replaced with the dress rehearsal version in reruns. (Man, I wonder if this is one of the most heavily-edited-in-reruns SNL episodes of all time?) The biggest difference I can remember is that, in the live version, Halle and Finesse are sitting at their table alone, whereas the dress version has Halle and Finesse accompanied at their table by Rachel and Amy as their friends. I wonder why Rachel and Amy’s roles were removed from the live version.
STARS: *½


SPEEDREADER
speedreader Gary (WLF) uses his skill to pick up (host) at a bar

— Oh, thank god Will Forte has come to save tonight’s dire episode. His patented oddball sketches are always very reliable.
— Hilarious reveal that Will’s sleazy character is a speedreader. It’s also equally hilarious how he keeps bragging about it, thinking it’ll impress Halle.
— I love the vocalizations Will makes whenever he speedreads.
— Will, after speedreading the bible: “Done! Poooooor Jesus.”
— I was actually shocked (as was the studio audience apparently, judging from their silence) at Will bluntly saying “I got a big dick…”, until he hilariously followed it up with, after a one-second pause, “…tionary.”
— This sketch ends a bit abruptly, seemingly because the show is running long. SNL’s been having a problem ending the show on time this season, as this is the second instance in these past three episodes in which the final sketch got cut off early due to the show running long.
STARS: ****½


GOODNIGHTS

— Yep, the show is indeed running long. Much like in the first episode of this season, these goodnights get cut off before Halle even finishes her goodnights speech.
— Speaking of Halle in these goodnights, I remember her sharing a story several months later on The Tonight Show With Jay Leno (lord knows why I was watching that show that night) about how SNL’s wardrobe crew dressed her for these goodnights in such a hurry that they accidentally put her boots on the wrong legs, and she had to do the whole goodnights like that.

IMMEDIATE POST-SHOW THOUGHTS
— As if I didn’t say it enough in this episode review… BLAH. Nah, fuck it. Blah is being too kind. This episode was flat-out terrible. The number of sketches I rated one or one-and-a-half stars almost rivals the number of one or one-and-a-half-star sketches from my reviews of some of the more notorious episodes from season 20. The difference is that none of tonight’s sketches are particularly disastrous or infamous among SNL fans (as far as I know). But still, what a lousy, lousy episode, and it has probably one of the lowest rating averages out of all of my reviews in this SNL project. The Speedreader sketch was the ONLY live sketch I liked all night (not counting the cold opening), and that was buried all the way at the end of the show. I remember when this episode originally aired, it was the official point where I started worrying about the quality of this season, especially since I didn’t like the season premiere either.


MY PERSONAL CHOICE OF “BEST OF” MOMENTS FOR THIS EPISODE, REPRESENTED WITH SCREENCAPS


HOW THIS EPISODE STACKS UP AGAINST THE PRECEDING ONE (Justin Timberlake)
a colossal step down


My full set of screencaps for this episode is here


TOMORROW
Kelly Ripa

Posted on

February 2, 2002 – Britney Spears (S27 E12)

Segments are rated on a scale of 1-5 stars

THE WOMEN’S DOWNHILL
Mormons (DAA) & (WIF) proselytize during Olympian’s (AMP) downhill run

— Ha, we get a random Dan Aykroyd appearance (who’s apparently there tonight to help tonight’s host, Britney Spears, promote her new movie Crossroads, as he plays her dad in it), being paired with Will as Mormons. Dan’s appearance in this cold opening is actually a last-minute addition. In dress rehearsal, Kattan played the role that Dan is playing here, but most (if not all) of Dan’s sketches got cut after this episode’s dress rehearsal, leaving him with little-to-nothing to do in the live show, so SNL threw him into Kattan’s role in this cold opening. I’m not 100% sure, but I also believe that in dress rehearsal, Britney Spears played the role that Amy’s playing in this cold opening, which probably means that this wasn’t the cold opening in dress (I can’t quite remember from the details I read long ago about this episode’s dress rehearsal).
— A pretty good laugh from the Mormons interrupting a skiier in the middle of an Olympic competition.
— Ehh, after the initial laughs from the aforementioned Mormon interruption, this doesn’t seem to have anywhere else to go, though it’s still passable enough.
— The Mormons telling Amy “Good luck in hell” as their parting message when Amy lets them know she doesn’t want to be a Mormon is pretty funny.
— I like Seth shoving Maya’s reporter character out of the way to bombard Amy with more Mormonism.
— Seth delivering a (solo) “Live from New York…” so early into his tenure as a featured player is a nice shock. SNL has been doing a great job of changing up the LFNYs these past two episodes, after an endless, tiring consecutive streak of episodes where Darrell and Will were the only cast members who got to deliver LFNY.
STARS: ***


MONOLOGUE
Justin Timberlake [real] learns he slept with host’s doppelganger (CHK)

— A good reveal after “Britney Spears”’ entrance that she’s actually Chris Kattan. Chris can now say that he’s posed onstage as both a certain musical guest and a certain host, at the beginning their musical performance/monologue: Ricky Martin in season 26 and Britney Spears tonight.
— After Chris’ comically bad dancing demonstration, I actually got an unintentional bigger laugh from Britney’s attempt to show Chris how it’s done. Britney’s supposedly “better” dancing was almost as terrible as Chris’. Back then in 2002, I remember SNL reviewing great Mark Polishuk describing Britney’s so-called dancing demonstration as being “one pole away from being a stripper’s gyration”.
— Much like in the Joshua Jackson episode from season 25, it still feels weird seeing N’Sync-era Justin Timberlake appearing on SNL.
— Another unintentional laugh, this time from how extremely early-2000s Justin’s shirt looks.
— It might just be me, but Justin’s coming off kinda bland here, which is surprising in retrospect. I’m not seeing any signs of the distinct comedic skills he would later surprise viewers with in his first hosting stint two seasons later.
— I got a laugh from Chris saying his personal life has been falling apart because Corky Romano didn’t do as well as he thought. Sadly, though, knowing some of the things I now know about Chris, I wouldn’t be surprised if he really did go through some issues in his personal life due to Corky Romano flopping.
STARS: **½


LOOSE BEAR
Rerun from 12/8/01


BRIAN FELLOW’S SAFARI PLANET
rabbit & donkey don’t cut their own hair

— After making its debut in the 10-to-1 slot several seasons prior, Brian Fellow’s Safari Planet has slowly made its way to the big post-monologue slot, where it would stay for most (if not all) of its subsequent installments during Tracy’s SNL tenure.
— As usual, Brian Fellow’s idiotic statements and snippiness crack me up.
— An interesting twist to these usual sketches, by showing a guest actually having the same thought bubble that Brian Fellow has.
STARS: ***½


INSIDE BARBIE’S DREAMHOUSE
Skipper (host) learns that she’s Barbie’s (AMP) daughter, not her sister

 

— An interesting premise that has potential.
— I like the mentions of the various famous dolls and action figures who are going to be at the party that Skipper wants to go to.
— Good reveal from Barbie that she and Skipper are actually mother and daughter instead of siblings.
— A big laugh from Barbie and Skipper demonstrating how their legs are double-jointed.
— Skipper, to Barbie, after being told her father is a Han Solo action figure: “He’s not even our scale! What kind of slut are you?!?”
— Nice detail with the stiff, doll-like hand movements Amy and Britney keep doing throughout this.
— (*groan*) Figures that Kattan would be the one who gets cast as a catty, effeminate Ken doll.
STARS: ****


JARRET’S ROOM
stoners Gobi (HOS) & Summer (host) make a perfect couple

— Jarret, to DJ Jonathan Feinstein: “If you’re from England, what’s the queen’s name?” DJ Jonathan Feinstein: “Latifah?”
— The first two or so minutes of these Jarret’s Room sketches are always kind of a write-off, as they just feature Horatio and Jimmy hamming it up, mugging straight into the camera, and cracking each other up (in other words, the usual nonsense whenever those two performers are paired together). These Jarret’s Room sketches don’t usually start getting fun until the host shows up, but I don’t see Britney as the kind of host who can add much to this sketch.
— Funny bit with Gobi and Britney’s character carrying on an entire conversation without either of them knowing what the other is saying.
— The spy cam footage of Jeff is worth some laughs, though it’s not as funny as the footage of him in the last Jarret’s Room installment.
— Overall, after a big upswing in quality with the last two Jarret’s Room sketches, we get the return of Jarret’s Room’s mediocrity tonight, though this installment wasn’t as bad as the ones from the preceding season. This had some decent moments here and there, but was lacking the infectiously fun feel of the last two installments.
STARS: **½


CAMP X-RAY
international critics misjudge edenic Camp X-Ray, says Dick Cheney (DAH)

— The premise of Camp X-Ray being glowingly advertised in the style of a tourism commercial is pretty funny, and the execution is okay, though nothing special.
STARS: ***


A MESSAGE FROM MARTHA STEWART
Martha Stewart (ANG) is rethinking her affiliation with bankrupt K-Mart

— A laugh from Ana’s Martha Stewart calling Ghostface Killah her very close friend. While it was intended as just a facetious line at the time, a real-life Martha Stewart/Ghostface Killah friendship would actually be far more believable nowadays, considering the hip-hop cred Martha has gained.
— Martha Stewart, to the bankrupt K-Mart: “If I had wanted to spend my life dragging a wounded, impotent beast around on my back, I would’ve stayed married.”
— Some pretty solid lines from Ana’s Martha towards the end of this sketch, but overall, this sketch was merely average, a step down from the usual strong sketches starring Ana’s Martha.
— This ends up being the final appearance of Ana’s Martha Stewart impression during Ana’s SNL tenure. This fantastic impression and all the great sketches she starred in over the years will be missed, though we do end up getting a guest appearance from Ana’s Martha in a season 29 cold opening.
STARS: ***


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
host performs “I’m Not A Girl, Not Yet A Woman”


WEEKEND UPDATE
SEM awards a point to JIF for making a joke palindrome

Geraldo Rivera (DAH) claims to have found Osama bin Laden in Somalia

JIF plays guitar & sings pop-inspired songs about the Winter Olympics

Gay Hitler speedskates as Neil Diamond (WIF) performs “America”

— Yeesh, Jimmy’s hair is looking particularly bad tonight.
— I love the randomness of Seth popping up from below to award a point to Jimmy for a joke palindrome.
— The debut of Darrell’s Geraldo Rivera impression, which is spot-on and pretty funny. He’s having a good amount of funny lines in tonight’s Update commentary.
— The usual okay-but-nothing-special guitar song medley from Jimmy. I do kinda like his spoof of Ludacris’ “Rollout”, though.
— Always great to get an Update walk-on from Will’s Neil Diamond.
— Neil Diamond: “You bet your balls it’s Neil Diamond.”
— Hmm, “Gay Speedskating Hitler” (which won’t make sense to any viewers who didn’t see the original Gay Hitler bit from earlier this season). Well, I see once again tonight that Kattan’s hard at work quashing those gay rumors about himself.
— Interesting and kinda fun how, as Neil Diamond’s musical number is closing out this Update, the Update guests from earlier tonight return in the background.
STARS: ***½


ASTRONAUT JONES
sci-fi romp is a vanity project for its star

— This sketch makes its debut.
— A pretty big night for Tracy, between him getting to do both Brian Fellow AND Astronaut Jones, both of whom would go on to be his two biggest signature recurring characters.
— Man, that is one epic theme song and opening credits sequence. Outstanding.
— Tracy’s one-word utterances in between each sentence of Britney’s long speech are hilarious.
— Tracy, after Britney’s speech ends: “Well, why don’t you jump outta that green jumpsuit and show me that fat ass?!?” I also love how, immediately after that line, this episode of Astronaut Jones ends, and you then realize that the opening title sequence was humorously longer than the episode itself was.
— Hilarious ending credits.
— Overall, an absolutely perfect Tracy Morgan sketch. I’ve always had very mixed feelings about them later turning this into a recurring sketch, but I’ll try to go into those subsequent installments with an open mind in this SNL project of mine.
STARS: *****


HBO FIRST LOOK
Gemini’s Twin & latest member (host) in hip-hop epic film

— This ends up being the final Gemini’s Twin sketch. (Quite a lot of recurring Ana Gasteyer pieces are being retired tonight.) Can’t say I’ll miss this recurring sketch, though I enjoyed the first few installments.
— A laugh from the title of Gemini’s Twin’s movie: Damn, My Dixie’s On Fire.
— I love Will’s spot-on look as a typical hip-hop producer.
— Will is getting his usual big laughs even in the smallest of roles. He especially got a good audience response from unnaturally pronouncing “asked” as “axed”, in a poor attempt from his character to sound “street”.
— I see ONCE AGAIN tonight that Kattan’s hard at work quashing those gay rumors about himself. My god, has he played a gay role in EVERY SINGLE SKETCH that he’s appeared in tonight? (Note: I’m only vaguely familiar with the real Brian Grazer and I can’t remember if he’s gay or not, but Kattan is playing him in a very effeminate, flamboyant way in this sketch.) Plus, there was the whole monologue earlier tonight. Jesus Christ, this is getting insane.
— Pretty funny line about Britney’s character playing a runaway slave named Ungawa, because Maya’s (black) character refused to do it.
— When Gemini’s Twin has stripped down to more revealing outfits for their big musical number, Ana’s real-life pregnancy is quite visible here. There had been public confirmation of her pregnancy sometime not too long before this episode’s original airing, which was a huge deal at the time, as she was the very first cast member in SNL history to be pregnant during their SNL tenure.
— I like how the HBO First Look format is changing up a lot of things in the Gemini’s Twin formula.
— Ana’s violin solo during the Gemini’s Twin musical number is very funny.
— Overall, this actually wasn’t bad. Better than the last two Gemini’s Twin installments, and a pretty good way for this recurring sketch to go out.
STARS: ***


9 NEWS MORNING EDITION
technical problems vex anchors (WIF) & (ANG) during morning news program

— Ana has been getting a lot of airtime tonight, which is very refreshing, considering how underutilized and clearly-on-her-way-out she’s been in a lot of this season’s episodes.
— Already a laugh right from the beginning, with the visibly obvious lack of chairs for Will and Ana.
— Ah, this is one of those everything-goes-wrong-during-a-TV-broadcast sketch, the type of sketch I’m always a sucker for.
— Funny visual of Ana chomping into a huge hoagie when she thinks she’s off-camera.
— I like Will’s perfectly Will Ferrell-esque delivery of “God, that’s a stinky dog! That is a stinky dog!”
STARS: ****


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
host performs “Boys”


THE LEATHER MAN
The Leather Man (JIF) sells squeaky animal-skin attire to (host)

— Oh, god, a SECOND Fallon & Sanz sketch tonight?
— I can already tell from the leather store setting that I’m not going to be crazy about this sketch, nor this character of Jimmy’s. Regarding the latter, this feels like a character more suitable for someone like Will, who could easily wring laughs out of a role like this in his sleep.
— Tom Davis is credited during the goodnights of tonight’s episode as guest writing a sketch. I really hope THIS isn’t the sketch he guest wrote, but I think it is, as Tom is also credited as a guest writer in the following season’s Brittany Murphy episode, which just so happens to contain another Leather Man sketch. (Come to think of it, the Brittany Murphy episode also contains two other recurring sketches from tonight’s episode: Jarret’s Room and Astronaut Jones, though regarding the former, Tom Davis obviously has nothing to do with the writing of those, and I certainly can’t see him writing the latter, either.)
— Okay, I am chuckling at the initial leather sound effects when Jimmy starts walking around, but those sound effects seem like they’re going to get old after a while.
— Of course, Jimmy IMMEDIATELY starts smirking when Horatio first comes waddling onscreen.
— A pretty funny walk-on from Dan Aykroyd in that ridiculous leather outfit. I can’t remember if I heard that his appearance in this sketch was also a last-minute addition after dress rehearsal, like his appearance in the cold opening.
— The running gag with Jimmy making Horatio scream by hitting him with a whip is clearly just an excuse to get Jimmy cracking up.
— A good laugh from Horatio’s naughty actions inside the dressing room.
— There’s Ana once again tonight.
— Back-to-school shopping in FEBRUARY???
— Pretty funny ending with Will, Ana, and their kids stealing clothes when they’re left alone in the store.
STARS: **½


GOODNIGHTS

IMMEDIATE POST-SHOW THOUGHTS
— A decent episode overall. The quality was a little all over the place, but even at its worst, the show never really bottomed out, and there was definitely more good than bad.


MY PERSONAL CHOICE OF “BEST OF” MOMENTS FOR THIS EPISODE, REPRESENTED WITH SCREENCAPS


HOW THIS EPISODE STACKS UP AGAINST THE PRECEDING ONE (Jack Black)
a slight step down


My full set of screencaps for this episode is here


TOMORROW
Jonny Moseley. We also get SNL pulling a very rare move and rehiring a certain recently-fired cast member.

Posted on

May 13, 2000 – Britney Spears (S25 E19)

Segments are rated on a scale of 1-5 stars

PRESS CONFERENCE
Rudolph Giuliani (DAH) & Hillary Clinton (ANG) on adulterous politicians

— I always like Darrell’s Rudy Giuliani impression.
— Some laughs from the goals Darrell’s Giuliani lists off, such as “Get my cops to stop shooting old black people.”
— Ana has some decent lines as Hillary.
STARS: ***


OPENING MONTAGE
— After debuting in just the last episode, Maya Rudolph has ALREADY been removed from the opening montage. Don’t be mistaken, she hasn’t been Emily Prager-ed or Laurie Metcalf-ed (the terms used for when a cast member lasts only one episode), she’s just not appearing in tonight’s episode. I guess SNL’s experimenting a bit by going back to their old practice of only crediting some of the featured players on certain weeks instead of crediting them on a regular basis. As we’ll soon see, upcoming season 26 hire Jerry Minor will go through this at an early point in that season.


MONOLOGUE
host unsuccessfully refutes rumors that she lip-syncs & has fake boobs

— A fairly funny, though simple, lip-sync bit.
— A good laugh from the bit with Britney’s breasts moving by themselves while she refutes rumors of having breast implants. I’d like to think that SNL is using the same special effect they used in a similar memorable bit that Pamela Stephenson once did on the show 16 years earlier.
— Wow, it’s over already? A surprisingly VERY short monologue, but it was pretty good for what it was, and was also pretty impressive that Britney could carry a solo monologue.
STARS: ***


GAP FAT
HOS & other khaki-clad plus-size people dance to “Cool”

— A spot-on and hilarious shot-by-shot parody of an actual Gap ad from this time. This is probably still funny to viewers who aren’t familiar with the source material this is spoofing.
— Horatio’s dancing is very funny, as is the close-up of him mouthing the words “real cool” to the camera.
STARS: ****


MORNING LATTE
disgruntled former Mouseketeer (host) slams Britney Spears

— This ends up being the final installment of this sketch.
— Boy, Cheri’s voice is absolutely SHOT. She must have come down with laryngitis. For this reason, this ends up being the only sketch she appears in all night, not including a musical guest intro that she does with her mother later tonight.
— Cheri, on how hot the weather is: “Hey, Janet Reno, did you put a gun in spring’s face and send it back to Cuba too?”
— Cheri’s character now mentions in passing that she has laryngitis, as SNL’s way of working Cheri’s voice problems into the sketch.
— Cheri: “I am sweating like a prostitute in church.”
— Cheri: “I believe that people should be judged based solely on their appearance.”
— I’m laughing at how Will and Cheri are scared of Britney’s hood character.
— Good characterization from Britney.
— Cheri attempting to imitate Britney’s crotch-grabbing dance move is quite a funny visual.
— An overall pretty solid final installment of this sketch, and Cheri in particular had a lot of good moments. A good way for this sketch to go out.
STARS: ***½


COLONIAL MUSEUM
Sully & Denise meet butter churner (host) at a colonial history museum

 

— Sully, to Britney, in regards to her low-cut colonial dress: “Hey, where’d you get that dress, Ye Olde House of Juggery?”
— I got a pretty good laugh from Denise’s line about how Sully’s mother’s breast milk is like Bailey’s Irish Cream.
— Hilarious line from Denise about getting fired from her last job for using a foot measurer inappropriately.
STARS: ***½


TV FUNHOUSE
“Trouble Coming Twice” by RBS- The Ambiguously Gay Duo at the NBA Finals

— Wow, this is the first Ambiguously Gay Duo cartoon in a fairly long while. As funny as these AGD cartoons are, I can understand why Robert Smigel is phasing them out.
— A big laugh from the visual of Ace and Gary in Village People costumes.
— The villains’ floating robotic device has a lot of funny dialogue.
— I like the change of pace with this AGD cartoon having a climactic scene taking place at the NBA Finals.
— Great visual of Gary suggestively blowing on the bird villain’s beak after squeezing it into a phallic shape.
— A hilarious ending shot of Ace patting Shaquille O’Neal’s bare butt in the L.A. Lakers’ locker room.
STARS: ****


WOODROW
smitten host is serenaded by Woodrow (TRM) at his place in the sewer

— I love the idea of this odd character for Tracy, who’s playing this role perfectly.
— Very funny line from Woodrow about stealing a mailbox because it has secrets about him.
— Woodrow’s absolute nonsense song with insane, non-sequitur lyrics is priceless and memorable.
— I’m loving how this sketch has both great humor and genuine sweetness, the latter feeling rare for this era.
— Overall, a Tracy Morgan classic.
STARS: *****


MUSICAL GUEST INTRO
Sarah Michelle Gellar [real] introduces host

— Random cameo, needless to say. It’s always welcome to see Sarah Michelle Gellar on SNL, though. It would’ve been nice to see her in an actual sketch tonight… oh, wait, that comes next week.


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
host performs “Oops!…I Did It Again”


WEEKEND UPDATE
CHP performs a hardcore rap about going on a dream date with host
Angelina Jolie’s (MOS) brother James (CHK) is upset that she got married

— Very nice to see Parnell doing an Update commentary as himself for a change.
— Parnell’s song unexpectedly turning out to be a hardcore rap song is freakin’ hilarious.
— Parnell’s rapping is INCREDIBLE. Who would’ve guessed at the time that he, of all people, could rap like that?
— So many great little things throughout Parnell’s rap, such as him doing the rhythmic tilted head turns (I can’t come up with a better description of that move) and the way he censors himself from saying “shit”.
— I love Parnell’s final lyric, mentioning that he has a “mother effin’” date with the special guest we just saw earlier tonight, Sarah Michelle Gellar.
— An overall absolutely amazing Chris Parnell commentary, and a great breakout moment for him. I also love hearing the huge audience reception he gets after he finishes his song.
— Humorously, a male audience member can be heard groaning after Colin’s mention of Paula Jones being in negotiations to pose nude for Penthouse. Colin has a somewhat funny reaction to that groan.
— All throughout this Update, Colin keeps fanning his face with the papers in his hand. I guess it really IS unbearably hot in New York at this time, as was mentioned earlier tonight in the Morning Latte sketch. Doesn’t SNL have air conditioning in their studio?
— Pretty spot-on casting of Jimmy as Billy Bob Thornton, as I can see somewhat of a facial resemblance. SNL later gets mileage out of this facial resemblance when Billy Bob Thornton hosts in season 27, by casting him as Jimmy’s father in a Nick Burns sketch.
— Pretty funny turn with the Angelina Jolie/Billy Bob Thornton commentary being crashed by Kattan as Angelina’s brother.
— Rachel returns as her deformed lovechild character, Qrplt*xk. This character of Rachel’s is always good for a big laugh, but are we supposed to forget the fact that in the previous Angelina Jolie commentary on Update a few episodes ago, it was revealed that Qrplt*xk was just an act put on by a professional child actor?
— Jimmy’s having a hard time staying fully in character throughout this commentary. There’s too much of a jokey demeanor in his performance here.
— Haha, boy, this Jolie/Thornton commentary is getting INSANE.
STARS: **½


AUDITION
dance moves of Kyle DeMarco & brother Sean (CHP) reflect host’s lyrics

— The return of a one-off Chris Kattan sketch from way back in season 22, now with the addition of Parnell as Kattan’s brother, a duo that would go on to become recurring characters.
— Feels like we’ve been seeing less and less of Tim Meadows as we get closer and closer to the end of this final season of his. Is this sketch his ONLY appearance all night? And he looks really bored during this sketch, though I’m aware that’s just him acting in character.
— A good laugh from the anal sex position Parnell and Kattan hold a frozen pose with when the lyric “I’m not that innocent” is played at the end of the snippet of the song “Oops!…I Did It Again”.
— Tim: “We gotta keep this thing moving, because if we don’t, I may have to shoot myself in the face.” That is such a perfect Tim Meadows-y line, much like his “I’m gonna take this nightstick and hit ya in the head” line from the preceding episode’s Bloater Brothers sketch. Good to see that SNL’s still getting some good mileage out of Tim’s delivery in this late stage of his SNL tenure.
— I just know I’m gonna get sick of this recurring sketch very soon, just as much as the next guy, but honestly, I haven’t been hating tonight’s installment so far. Maybe because it’s the first installment with both DeMarco brothers, so I’m going a little easy on it, or maybe because I’m on such a Chris Parnell high tonight after his amazing rap on Weekend Update. There’s a goofiness to this sketch that I’m finding a little charming (especially from Parnell), though not particularly hilarious.
STARS: ***


AMERICA’S WORST MOMENTS
America’s Worst Moments commemorative plates immortalize cultural shames

— After such a serious beginning regarding the Elian Gonzalez saga, we get a very funny reveal of the infamous “a terrified Elian Gonzalez being captured by soldiers” picture being proudly displayed in a commemorative plate.
— Great premise of embarrassing events in American history being celebrated in commemorative plates. I especially like the mention of the “Clarence Thomas coke can” incident.
— Parnell is so perfect for this. He’s having such a strong night in tonight’s episode in general.
— Ah, I see SNL recognizes that tonight’s episode is the 10th anniversary of the controversial SNL episode that Andrew Dice Clay hosted (May 12, 1990), as they mention him in this sketch as one of the examples of America’s worst moments. Nah, I know the mention of him in tonight’s episode is just a coincidence and has nothing to do with the 10th anniversary of his SNL hosting stint; I’m just a nerd when it comes to coincidental similarities between SNL episodes that happen to have a corresponding airdate.
STARS: ****


COMEBACK TOUR
on-stage, band of abusive diva Deandra Wells (ANG) reaches breaking point

— There’s Parnell ONCE AGAIN tonight. This is really his night. I’m very happy to see this happening to such an underappreciated performer.
— An interesting new character for Ana, who’s doing her usual solid job here.
— Strangely, you can see loose pieces of scotch tape holding up Ana’s long fake fingernails (the second above screencap for this sketch).
— I got a pretty good laugh from Ana’s message to a “huge” audience member in the crowd.
— Funny cutaway to Will’s angry speechless facial expression in reaction to a passive-aggressively rude thing that Ana’s telling him.
— A great sudden turn with Parnell’s FURIOUS outburst at Ana. Fantastic delivery from Parnell here.
— Pretty funny ending with Ana awkwardly going back to her song after getting chewed out by her disgruntled band.
STARS: ***½


UNCLE JEMIMA’S PURE MASH LIQUOR
Rerun from 2/5/00


MUSICAL GUEST INTRO
CHO wishes her mom [real] Happy Mother’s Day & introduces host

— A nice Mother’s Day moment between Cheri and her mom. It also comes off somewhat as a bittersweet Cheri Oteri moment in retrospect, considering this ends up being Cheri’s second-to-last episode as a cast member.


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
host performs “Don’t Let Me Be The Last To Know”


GOODNIGHTS

IMMEDIATE POST-SHOW THOUGHTS
— A consistently good episode, containing nothing that I disliked (aside from some Colin Quinn portions of Weekend Update). Even the weakest sketch of the night, The DeMarco Brothers, was still tolerable for me. For a young pop singer, Britney Spears was not bad as a host. Her childhood experience in The Mickey Mouse Club probably helped her work well in SNL sketches, as it would her fellow Mouseketeer-turned-pop-singers who would later do an impressive job hosting SNL: Justin Timberlake and Christina Aguilera. And it can’t be said enough what a strong night Chris Parnell had in this episode. I recall an SNL fan or two saying that this was the episode that made them finally start to really take notice of Parnell.


MY PERSONAL CHOICE OF “BEST OF” MOMENTS FOR THIS EPISODE, REPRESENTED WITH SCREENCAPS

 


HOW THIS EPISODE STACKS UP AGAINST THE PRECEDING ONE (John Goodman)
a fairly big step up


My full set of screencaps for this episode is here


TOMORROW
Season 25 comes to an end, with host Jackie Chan. It’s also the end of the road for Cheri Oteri, Colin Quinn, and long-time veteran Tim Meadows.